20. Distraction

Chapter 20: Distraction

Mika

The house was quiet, which was exactly what I needed right now. I had one more test to take before I got my GED, finally. It was still a couple days away, but I needed to study as much as possible for it to make sure I passed. And today was the best day to focus all of my attention on it.

Sam was napping, Allen was at work, and his parents had gone out somewhere. They could be back any second now, considering I had no idea what their plans were, so I was using every bit of time I had now to study as much as I could.

Having them here was weird. They were weird. I still doubted that they were even Allen's parents. I mean, yeah, they looked alike, but they way they acted was so different from anything I've ever seen Allen do. They constantly bickered with each other, sometimes over tiny things, other times it was a larger issue, like Allen being with me.

Man, that hurt to just watch Edwin hit Allen yesterday. What kind of father did that to their son? I hated to think what his childhood was like if the hit seemed to barely faze any of them. If I had any say in anything - which I still wasn't entirely sure of - Sam will never in his life get hit by either one of us. That isn't how anyone should raise a child. Not like I would know, but I do know that, since I guess Sam is kinda mine now too, he needs supportive parents in his life.

And I plan on being there for him; as weird as that seems to me still. But I love him - and Allen. I do. I don't know how it is even possible, but I guess there's just something about those two that can really bring out the best in me. And I'll forever be grateful to Allen for seeing whatever it is in me long before I could.

Look at me, I'm getting sappy. This isn't me, having emotions and shit like that. Is this what happens when you fall in love? You start feeling more things? I didn't think I liked it very much. I've spent so much time blocking emotions from myself that I no longer knew how to handle them.

I hadn't even thought of the possibility of me blocking my emotions for so long until Allen mentioned it last night, right before we went to bed. He suggested it, and, at the time, I shrugged it off. But now I was actually thinking about it and it made sense. It could be the reason why I was never really bothered by what I needed to do back then to earn enough money for both of us to survive. Now I just hated thinking about it.

The door in the kitchen opened and I sighed. Allen's parents were back. So, hoping to avoid them a little longer, I focused back on the laptop in front of me, figuring they might leave me alone if I looked busy enough.

I knew my planned failed as soon as I felt arms wrap themselves around my neck and warm lips pressed against my cheek. I slowly looked at Allen, not amused.

"Aren't you supposed to be at work?" I asked.

He smiled, kissing my cheek again. "Figured I'm come home and save you from the torture that is my parents."

I shook my head. "That was pointless. They're not even here."

"No, but you are."

Rolling my eyes, I shifted my position so that I was facing him as he backed up. "No duh."

His smile never fell, even when he pulled out his phone and started typing away on it. I wasn't sure what he was doing, but judging by the smile, I wasn't sure I was going to like it. Sure enough, barely a minute later, he placed the phone on the desk behind me and pulled me to my feet just as a slowish Christmas song started playing.

"What are you doing?" I asked, even though the answer was obvious as he placed his hand on my hip while still holding onto mine with his other hand. I sighed. "I don't dance, Allen."

"Well today you do," he replied simply. "For me?"

I sighed again, putting my hand on the back of his neck. "Fine." Love sucks.

We didn't do all that much as far as dancing, mostly just swaying back and forth, which I was grateful for. And we really only got through one song before we stopped moving altogether, drawing ourselves closer to each other until our lips were only an inch apart.

I was about to close that distance when the front door opened with a bang. Of course they'd choose now to come back. Just perfect timing.

Allen didn't back away from me, though, instead, he placed his lips against mine, ignoring his parents walking into the room. I was barely aware of Eliza making a small noise - what it meant, I couldn't be sure, but it might have been because she thought we were cute or some nonsense like that. I swear she wouldn't shut up about that this morning just before he left for work. Because, apparently, him kissing me goodbye was cute. Ugh.

I broke the kiss barely a second later, hating that I could feel her watching us. All I wanted to do was study so that I could pass this stupid test, but that doesn't seem like it's going to happen any time soon.

"I'm so glad you're home early, Allen," Eliza started immediately. "Your father and I decided that we'll watch Sammy tonight if you two wanted to go out by yourselves."

Allen, who hadn't yet let go of my waist, pulled me even closer to him. "What do you say?" he asked me quietly. "Dinner, then come back here so you still have time to study?"

Getting out of the house without Sam for once sounded pretty good. So I nodded. "Only if I get to pick the place." If today, of all days, was the day we got to go out, I knew where I needed to go. Probably not the best idea, but I needed to.

We left about an hour later. It was still kinda early to be considered dinner time, but hopefully there wouldn't be too many people going out to eat now. Not like the place I wanted to go to was ever crowed.

It was a tiny place that used to be Amy's favorite. Each year, I would make sure to save enough money to buy her the best birthday dinner from here as I could. And since it was her birthday today, it was fitting that we go, especially because she seemed to be on my mind more and more these last couple of days as usual this time of year.

Allen didn't even seem to care if it wasn't some fancy place he probably would have picked if it was up to him. He didn't ask how I knew of it or anything either. Which I was grateful for. I may have trusted him enough to tell him about some of my past - actually a lot, even though it wasn't everything - but that didn't mean I wanted to have another talk about my dead sister.

We had only just gotten our food when I heard it. That giggle that I never thought I'd hear again. I immediately spun in my seat to see a family walking in through the door. I barely looked at the adults, focusing instead on the young girl.

It only took another second for her eyes to land on me. It wasn't a very big place, and I knew - if it was actually her - her habits of watching the customers because, according to her, people were interesting.

I had to be going crazy. With everything going on, I wouldn't doubt that I was imagining seeing my dead sister. There wasn't any other option.

I saw her mouth open slightly in surprise before she took off, running straight for me. The woman yelled something after her, but I wasn't listening, too glad that my sister was in my arms again for the first time in over two years. She had gained weight and gotten taller, but since she wasn't actually dead, I wasn't too surprised by that.

"Amy, leave the poor man alone," the woman said, yanking her off of me. "I am so sorry about her. I don't know why she did that." She said that last part with a glare at Amy, who didn't seem to notice.

I reached out and took Amy's hand. "She did that because she's my sister," I all but growled at the woman. She shouldn't be talking to Amy like that.

"So you're the brother that left a little girl for dead." It wasn't a question, more like she was accusing me.

"I didn't know. I thought she was."

She had been so tiny back then. So weak that she could barely stand up on her own. I knew she was out of time, but I brought her - carrying her for so many blocks I lost count - to the hospital anyway. They took her into the emergency room with unhopeful looks, then told me to fill out paperwork that I wasn't able to fill out. We had no insurance, we had no money. My only hope was that someone there might be able to do something. I gave back the blank papers to the person behind the desk - whether it was a man or a woman didn't make it to my memory of that day - and they said only two words: "I'm sorry". I didn't wait for more. I knew what that meant. They didn't need to spell it out for me. So I left and never looked back. I didn't know I had a reason to stay.

But now she was here, over two years later, alive and healthy. And, from the looks of it, stuck with foster parents. The woman seemed controlling and the man they had walked in with had already made himself comfortable at the bar on the other side of the room. But they did take her here for her birthday, most likely because that's what she wanted. And if they cared about what she wanted, they couldn't be so bad.

The woman placed a hand on Amy's shoulder and tugged her out of my reach. "Let's go. He obviously never cared about you."

Amy looked like she wanted to argue - I sure as hell did - but the woman pulled her away so quickly there was nothing I could do besides yelling across the place or chasing after them. And I had Allen leaning over the table to place his hand over mine, holding me back.

I looked at him. I didn't need to say anything. He knew already. Or at least, I had some faith that he was smart enough to figure it out from that. Neither of us said anything, so I looked back across the room to watch Amy.

She was being held still by the woman, who looked like she was trying to convince the man to leave. They weren't even going to stay here to eat. And now, because I was here, she didn't get the one decent thing that she was probably looking forward to.

Amy was looking back at me while her foster parents argued. She didn't belong with them, but she was probably better off with them than she ever had been with me. For the first year we were on our own, we lived under a fucking bridge, and she was barely older than Sammy is now. At least she was probably going to school now.

I was still watching her when she slipped out of the woman's hold and came back over to me. She didn't run, that way she wouldn't be caught again. I always knew she was smart.

I held out my arms when she got closer and she instantly hugged me back. "I'm so sorry," I whispered into her hair. "I never should have left you."

She backed up a bit to look at me. "I just hope I didn't mess things up with him so you can't get money for sex later."

She pointed at Allen when she said that, but I didn't dare look at him to see if he heard, which he probably did. She wasn't exactly being quiet about it.

"I don't do that anymore." There was no point denying it. I did. A lot, actually, and I guess Allen knows now. I never wanted him to know. I didn't know what he'd think of me for it. But I stopped after Amy died - or I thought she died. I didn't need as much money anymore, so I could get by with just the random jobs I was working.

She nodded her head just as I noticed the woman start looking for Amy. I quickly turned to Allen. "Do you have a pen?" He barely thought about it before taking one out of his pocket (which I knew he always kept there) and handed it to me. As quickly as I could, I wrote down our address on a napkin.

"Here," I said, handing the napkin to Amy. "Come by whenever. We'll talk. Without her." I motioned over Amy's shoulder just as the woman started stalking over here. "I'll see you soon. Promise." I had no doubt Amy would be fine walking around the city by herself, even if she was only nine - or I guess she turned ten today - she grew up on the streets with me. And she probably could read by now. I taught her a little bit, but if she was in school, she'd have no problem with the address. The only issue would be getting away from those controlling people that acted like her guardians.

Amy gave me one last hug, and when she did, she whispered in my ear, "I know you didn't mean to leave me, Meeky. And I'm glad you're not doing those bad things anymore."

I smiled at her, even as the woman was pulling her back. "Happy birthday," I said, hoping that for once, she might even get a piece of cake tonight. I just wanted her to be happy. Even if she's in the system, she has someone looking after her the way I never could. Even if that woman didn't like me, she was protecting Amy. I could live with that, if Amy was happy. If she wasn't, there was going to be hell to pay.