Chapter-30

I crinkle my eyes in attempt to push away the sunlight hitting my face. When that didn't work I try to put hands in front of my face, still not able to achieve what I intended. I get up from my sleep and sit on my bed annoyed at the interruption in my sleep.

I yawn and strech my limbs.

Rubbing my eyes I slowly open them to see my surroundings. White bedsheets, off white walls, sunlight entering through the huge windows.

This is not my room.

Then it hits

Lorenzo,office, wound, kiss and then

Ohh noooo

What was I thinking?

Why didn't I protest or tell him to stop? He would have stopped immediately, I know him.

What he must be thinking?

What if he thought that I am an easy women?

I put my head in between my hands pondering over his views on me.

He is not with me that means he must have been disgusted by this wayward behaviour of mine.

That's why he left.

I immediately remove the sheets and get up to go to him and tell him I am not what he is perciving me as.

But I stop as I reach the door. What if he still decides to leave me?

What if he don't like me?

He would be irritated by my presence just like other people.

My hands start shaking and my vision turns blurry. I feel my chest tightening and my cries escaping.

Why am I like this?

I think and go towards the bed.

As I sit on the mattress I notice a card lying on the desk adjoining the bed.

Out of curiosity I pick it up with shaky hands.

"Sweetheart"

I notice the lorenzo's handwriting and I grip the letter harder.

I read further.

"Hope your not drained by yesterday darling. I had to leave as some urgent work came by but I'll try to get back as soon as possible.

Have some food though, don't you dare strave yourself."

- Lorenzo

My tears fall wetting the paper underneath.

My silent cries turn into full blown crying as I cover my eyes with the paper.

My overthinking is tiring. The constantly running brain conjuring up scenarios that physically hurt me is exhausting. I want my mind to still for a second.

Slowly my cries subside as I take deep breaths to relieve me of the tightness I was feeling earlier.

I smile as I again read the paper. My tears have blurred some words but they are still readable.

A small laugh escapes me when I realise he didn't want to leave me or that he didn't hate me.

I sigh and fall back onto bed holding that piece of paper close to my heart. My emotional dependence on people is fatiguing.

A feeling of serenity fills me up now that I know he didn't abandon me.

Holding that note tightly in my hands I get up to freshen up and maybe cook something from him.

...............

I hold the ladle and move it stirring the curry. I decided to cook a nice meal for him when he gets home.

"Cognata, you cooking again?"

I hear luca and a moment later see him entering the kitchen and sitting on the shelf.

"Wow, after last time I was dying to get to taste your hand cooked food again."

Smiling at him I take a spoon dip it in the curry and hold it out for him to taste.

He hurriedly takes the spoon in his mouth.

"How is it?"

I ask a little worried whether it's according to his liking or not.

"Yummyyyy."

He says exaggeratly and relishes on the small amount of curry I gave.

I chuckle seeing his antics.

"Elena, why are you standing there? Come join us."

He says and I turn around to see Elena standing at the door of the kitchen.

She looks a bit sombre by her expression but she soons hide it.

She gives a big smile to Luca and moves in.

I turn off the gas seeing the curry is done and utter

"Yes please come and join us for lunch too."

She stands besides Luca still smiling but when she looks at me her smile falters.

It's like the happy fake exterior she is keeping in front of him is breaking.

Her resolve is breaking my seeing me.

"Luca, will you please bring me some groceries?"

Knowing he won't refuse I ask him.

'Groceries, cognata?"

He asks confused

"But, you have cooked the meal already."

"I am deciding on adding a few more dishes."

"Fine if you are asking but otherwise I would have made any worker do it."

He says showing that he is really going the extra mile.

I smile and tell him

"You are the best Luca."

"Cognata, just say that in front of Fratello. That's all I ask in return."

"Ok I'll do it."

I say seeing his enthusiasm.

"Yessss."

He says and waddles out of the kitchen like an exicted baby.

Seeing him move out I turn towards Elena and ask her

"What is it?"

I ask her.

"What?'

She tries to avoid the question but I still ask.

"Tell me now, Elena. What happened?"

She gulps knowing there is no way out with me now.

"Sorella, I did the research you ask me do on mafisio capo."

My heartbeat picks up on hearing just about this topic.

"And and I found somethings."

She stops

"What did you find Elena? Tell me."

My hand turn clammy and my throat dries up I feel a weird sensation bubbling in my stomach. My face is feeling hot and my mind is fearing of the unknown truth.

She pulls out her phone and shows me a photo.

A photo of Lorenzo in a suit, a wedding suit precisely.

But he is not alone a lady is standing by his side.

The same girl from the park.

Same hair, same eyes and same smile.

They both are looking at the camera and smiling. I have never seen him smile so widely before. He looks so happy.

That weird feeling starts to build up more and reach a point of erratic pace.

My mind is all fuzzed up, heart beating so fast that I could hear the beats in my ears.

I know who she is but still mind conjures up all the lies to feel safe, heart refusing to accept what I already know. So I ask

"Who is she?"

Elena stays quiet for a moment but then she replies.

"I am afraid that's his wife."

My heartbeat shatters, mind goes blank and that feeling stops.

There is a moment of silence where I feel every particle around me settle, a moment of stillness to appreciate this bitter truth that is smashing my heart into the pieces which I think I won't be able to join back.

"Noone except him and close family knows about her. Her and lorenzo's father are quite good friends and I think it's a marriage of convienence. It's quite common in Mafia world.

I only found this photo of them together."

She says but mind don't register her words.

It's lost deep in it's own grief, everything in my body is weeping except my eyes.

She keeps a hand on my shoulder and says

"I might be wrong sorella after all what can a single photo tell?"

She gives me false sympathy. I know it's not true but my weak heart is too broken so it makes this hope as it's shield and fight against my mind for a battle I know my mind must win.

But I am not that strong atleast now, so I support my heart and say.

"Yes yes youu are r right wwhat can a photo tell? What cannn it teelll?"

I say stammering badly.

She quickly pours some water in a glass and hands me the glass.

"Yes, sorella we mustn't make assumptions. You should discuss your feelings with capo."

I drink the water and nod.

I have to discuss it with him.

He'll tell me the truth.

But what if he lies?

Maybe he'll feed me lies and not tell me the truth.

I need truth only, I build up my reslove but I know deep down that truth is far from what I need right now.

I just need him.

................................

Sorry I am quite late with the update this time but something just came up and I got quite wind up in it but I'll try to make it up to you all by updating other chapters quickly.

Hope you enjoy the chapter.

Do like and comment to tell me about your opinions on the story.

And sorry again for the delay.