8.3|Fidaa: Her Home|

She was in peace. After whole five years, she was home. Finally.

She could feel her Shahana Amma caressing her hair and the teardrops that kept running down Shahana's wrinkled face.

On the other side her Neelofer Amma was sitting, holding her cold hand between her warm ones.

Aziz was standing in a corner, looking at his Dada Jaan. He was waiting for him to speak something. Something he had promised to Aziz five years ago.

But it was hard for Dada Jaan. He will complete his promise no matter what. But the consequences may apart him from his younger son Ibrahim. Even if Ibrahim let his grudges go, Shahana will never forget his injustice. But he had to fulfill the promise he made to Aziz.

That the day Aziz will bring Fida back, he will get Aziz and Fida married. He will break Aziz and Kauser's engagement that day.

"Ahmed." Dada Jaan called his elder son.

"Jee, Abba Jaan?"

"Aziz ke Nikkah ki tayyari shuru karo..."

Kauser's head snapped to his direction.

How could he?

She was so happy to get her little Fida back, but his one order ruined her happiness.

Can't he see she don't want to marry Aziz?

Her grandfather looked at her and continued,

"...Fida ke saath." He was trying to gauge her reaction.

Did he again made her upset?

Did he again became the cause of her tears?

Did he again discriminate between Aziz and Kauser?

No.

He could see relief wash over her. As if a burden was lifted up from her soul.

"Ye aap kya keh rahe hai, Abba Jaan?" Shahana protested. She stood up from her seat, all of a sudden her aura turned cold and stoic.

"Aziz aur Kauser ki mangni hui thi das saal pehle. Ye das saal maine besabri se apni beti ke nikkah ka intzaar kiya hai. Aur ab aap Aziz ka nikkah Fida se karwana chahte hai?"

Shahana felt betrayed. Her daughter was 27 now, the age when a woman should be enjoying motherhood. {Shahana's point of view, not mine.}

"Shahana..." Ibrahim tried to calm down his wife. He was kind of relieved at this decision because he very well knew that Aziz and Kauser were each other's ruin. He kept quiet because it was his mother's last wish to get the kids married in the future.

"Ibrahim, rokei'n Abba Jaan ko. Woh hamari beti ki zindagi barbaad kar denge." By now Shahana was a crying mess.

But her tears were only agitating Kauser. For the first time she was so elated on her Dada Jaan's any decision.

She needed to make Shahana understand the situation.

"Amma, aayein mere saath." Kauser held Shahana's shoulders and took her to her parents' bedroom.

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Shahana was sitting on the bed. Her tears were just like her, stubborn.

"Amma, jo ho raha hai, sahi ho raha hai. Mujhe koi aitraaz nahi hai Aziz aur Fida ke nikkah se."

"Kauser, pagal ho gayi hai? Khwab dekhein hai maine tere aur Aziz ke nikkah ke. Dhokha diya hai Abba Jaan ne. Naa unhone kabhi mujhe apni bahu mana, naa tujhe apni poti. Koi qadr nahi hai hamari unki nazron mai."

"Amma, agar qadr naa hoti toh mujhe itna padhate nahi. Haan, maanti hoon Aziz laadla hai unka, par ab ehsaas ho raha hai ke unhone kabhi mujhe Aziz se kam nahi samajha. Uss vaqt unhone meri Aziz ke saath mangni karwayi kyunki Dadi Jaan apni aakhri saansein ginn rahi'n thi. Unki aakhri khwahish thi yeh."

"Toh ab kyun nahi puri kar rahe woh apni biwi ki aakhri khwahish?"

"Kyunki woh apne potey-poti ki zindagi barbaad nahi karna chahte. Amma... ek baar ke liye bhool jaao jo abhi hua. Aap batao mai Aziz se shaadi kyun karu?"

"Waris hai woh iss khandan ka. Tujhe khush rakhega."

"Amma, khushiyan daulat mein nahi toli jati. Ek dusre ki shakal dekhna tak nahi pasand karte hum. Ye mangni sirf ek bojh thi hamare liye. Mujhe nahi hai Aziz se mahobatt, aur naa kabhi hogi. Mujhe aisa shohar chahiye jo mujhe apne baraabar rakhe. Aziz waisa mard bilkul bhi nahi hai."

Shahana was quiet.

Her daughter was absolutely correct. She herself married Ibrahim because he wasn't like other men.

He never dominated her. He never ordered her. He never belittled her.

And obviously, Kauser also want the same. Someone as chivalrous as her father.

She wiped her tear-stricken face and smiled.

"Chal kar phir dholki ka intzaam. Meri choti-si Fida dulhan ban-ne vali hai."

Kauser broke into tears. Tears of happiness. She hugged her mother and let the happiness overjoy her.

{I was really excited to write this particular scene. Kauser is voicing out all girls' feelings.}

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"Badi ajeeb ho, Amma. Pehle toh duhaiyaan de rahi thi ke Dada Jaan ne aapke saath dhokha kiya hai, aur ab unhi ke liye haleem banayi jaa rahi hai." Kaysan commeted while leaning against the entrance of the kitchen and was eating almonds.

"Abba Jaan ko kahan pasand mere haath ka khana. Ye toh mai Fida ke liye bana rahi hoon. Yaad nahi kaise tere hisse ki haleem bhi kha jaya karti thi." Shahana smiled and kept stirring the gravy.

"Yaad hai. Phir jab mai naraaz ho jata toh apni chocolates mujhe de deti thi. Waise Aziz Bhaijaan ne mujhe aur Marwaan Bhaijaan ko thamki di hai ki hum Fida se doori banaye rakhe." He told his mother in a hushed tone, in case if any other family member heard him.

"Sahi toh keh raha hai. Najaane unn darindo'n ne kya zulm kiye honge masoom par. Mardo'n ke khilaaf uske dil mein darr toh baith hi gaya hoga. Thoda vaqt toh lagega iss darr ko kam hone mein." Shahana could understand Aziz's concern. As a woman, born in a society where rape culture is a hobby of spoilt rich men, she very well knew what Fida was going through.

"Baat toh sahi hai. Aziz Bhaijaan par proud feel ho raha hai. Fida se kitna pyaar karte hai, ye jaante huye bhi ki woh ek victim hai aur unki shaadi-shuda zindagi normal nahi hogi." Kaysan was never close to Aziz, it was a big thing that he was praising his not-so-favourite cousin.

"Ise saccha pyaar kehte hai, jo teri samajh se bahar hai." Shahana commented while chopping tomatoes.

"Aur kya expect kar sakti hai aap mujhse? Mujhse bina puche meri mangni Shafaq se kardi. Mujhe kya pata pyaar kya hota hai." He pouted. C'mon, his mother just taunted him that he doesn't know what true love is.

"Mai tere baap jaisi nahi hoon, jo teri baato'n mein aa jaaun. Jaa ke do akkhar padh le. Aur khabardaar agar tune woh aag wali game khelni shuru kardi toh." She pointed the sharp-edged knife in his direction and gave a murderous expression.

"Amma, usse Freefire kehte hai." Kaysan said irritatedly, and already planning to play a custom with a friend of his.

"Jo bhi kehte hai, par tune khelni nahi hai." Why Shahana was saying this when she knew he will play Freefire no matter what.

"Theek hai, nahi khelta." Liar. He always says the same yet plays the game everyday. For once he could skip bath or food, but not Freefire.

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"Yay! Meri mangni toot gayi. Meri mangni toot gayi." Kauser was jumping around in her room. She was on cloud nine. Finally she was free from that forced engagement. The engagement ring was given back to Aziz's mother Neelofer who blessed Kauser for being so understanding.

C'mon, Neelo aunty, I agree your son is ravishingly handsome but his ego is of Titanic's size. My poor Kauser once will agree to marry Hitler, but not your egoistic son.

But again, every mother thinks very high of her child.

Kaysan was passing through her room, already playing Freefire on his phone. But her jolly voice caught his attention.

Kaysan entered her room and witnessing her happy dance, he thought...

"Toh mera shak sahi nikla, ye ladki padaishi pagal hai. Aur mangni tootne par toh iska level of pagalpan aur bhi badh gaya hai."

But a Pagal's brother is also a Pagal. And when two Pagal unites, this calls for lots of Pagalpanti.

"Sheesha ho yaa dil hooooooo, toot jata hai... toot jata hai... toot jata hai."

I am glad that Taansen died centuries ago. Because if he was alive, and listened to Kaysan's singing. He would have either suicide because of his torturous singing, or would have killed Kaysan for disrespecting the spirit of music.

"Oye Besure Taanpure, tera dil kisne tod diya?" Kauser put her hands over her ears.

Kaysan stopped singing, but didn't reply to her sarcastic remark. Instead he began finding something beneath the bed. When he didn't find it there he looked on her dressing table, cupboard, and the balcony as well.

"Kya dhoodh raha hai?" Kauser asked her James Bond brother.

"Tera dimaag."

Kauser glared into his direction.

Did he just indirectly called her brainless?

"Oye hoye! Mai toh bhool hi gaya, Allah miyaan ne toh tujhe dimaag diya hi nahi hai." His tone was mischievously grim. He just loves to provoke his angry bird sister.

"Oye hoye hoye! Bewakoofo'n ka sardaar mujhe bad-dimaag keh raha hai. Ruk, abhi Abba ko teri Ayesha, Nida aur Ruqsana ke baare mein batati hoon."

"Oye! Kaun hai ye ladkiyan? Maine toh inka naam bhi pehli baar suna hai."

"Lekin agar maine Abba ko keh diya ki tu college mein saheliyan bana raha hai, unhone tujhe jaydaad se bedhakal kar dena hai."

"Mujhe pata tha ki tu mere hisse ke picche padi hui hai. Sunn le, sapne chod de apne hisse ke. Ladkiyo ko nahi milta jaydaad mein hissa."

"Hissa chahiye bhi nahi. Job karti hoon, teri tarah muft ki rotiyan nahi todti Abba ke paise par."

"Abba ke baad unka karobaar maine hi sambhalna hai."

"Kaise? Freefire aur PUBG khel kar? Maalik ban-ne se pehle kaabil ban-na padta hai. Aur tu kaabil nahi, kaablichand hai. Good for nothing."

A simple teasing turned into a heated argument. Kauser, without thinking, said harsh words to Kaysan. The words which crumbled down his ego. She said right though.

He glared at her and left without another exchange.

And Kauser sighed, she shouldn't have behaved this way.

"Kauser, sahi keh raha tha Kaysan. Tu hai bad-dimaag." She scolded herself, fulfilling her mother's duty for a day.

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"Aapki mangni tootne ki khushi mein ek treat ho jaaye?" Marwaan asked Kauser when they were having a walk after the dinner.

"Itni raat ko?"

"Haan, hatti walo'n ne ice cream freezers lagwa liye hai."

(In Punjabi, "Hatti" means general store or karyana shop.)

"Phir toh ice cream banti hai. Chalo, chalte hai"

Marwaan smiled and both the cousins sneaked out of the haveli.

Marwaan is so content with his one-sided feelings. He never expected anything from her, because he already had her attention more than others, he knew this fact. About the feeling called love, Kauser will never love him, he knew this fact as well.

The reason was simple. He was younger than her by age. It wasn't a big deal, he understands. But the society they live in, there's an unspoken norm that a girl should not marry a guy younger than her. Maybe because old folks or so called wise people thought that an elder wife will dominate the household and her husband. Or maybe because of those gender stereotypes, men are mature and women are childish. A women needs someone more mature than her.

But what I believe is that it's women who made this norm a compulsion. We find men elder than us mature and younger than us childish. There's nothing wrong in this that we are attracted to men elder than us. But still, somehow this stereotype has made marrying a man younger than you, a taboo.

Don't you think so?

When was the first time you heard of a marriage in which husband was younger than his wife? Didn't it raise questions in your mind?

It raised questions in my mind though. As a kid, I myself believed that husband should always be elder than his wife. Even if I had no explanation for this thinking. It's what I have seen. And when the first time I got to know about a marriage where husband was younger than his wife, I was baffled.

My friend, Sammar, once asked me while reading a story of mine.

"Yaar, a man can marry a woman ten years younger than him. Then why can't a woman marry a man ten years younger than her?"

I couldn't answer her question.

Can you answer this question? Especially if you are a girl.

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While writing the last few paragraphs I forgot it's a story, not my diary.

And my book HIS CHANDA has completed 40K reads yesterday. It's my best till now, do give the book a try.

I am expecting COMMENTS on this chapter. Because the social issue I mentioned in the 9.1 chapter was revealed in the last few paragraphs.

And one more request, please share this book with your friends. Because I feel very underrated. Just today I read few desi short story books, and honestly it was a torture to read books with so many grammatical mistakes and boring storytelling. But guess what, those books had reads more than 100K. Even when my english is understandable and my storytelling made a confusing story like Rich Hearts tolerable, why only about 25 readers votes out of 200 others.