Dust to Dirt
I stayed outside for a little bit to watch the next training session. I t was nice to just hang out in the sun. Tristan sat with me for a little bit and we talked until he had to leave to go do some work.
I was so relax that I nearly fell asleep. I would have if the yelling hadn't started. I jerked up instantly alert. Everyone was running around, gathering up the now crying children who didn't understand what was going on. I caught a flash of red and followed it. "Alex!" I yelled and she froze. I ran over to her. "Alex, what's going on?"
She didn't turn around to face me. "Grant said that you need to go up to your room."
My brow furrowed. "Why? What's happening? Why is everyone freaking out? Alex?"
She turned around and I saw tears streaking down her cheeks and she wouldn't meet my eyes. "There's been an attack on the edge of the territory."
"An attack?" I repeated not understanding. "As in rogues? Who?" She shook her head and tears dripped off her chin. "Alex?" Then cold realization hit me. "The edge of the territory. The only people who live that far out are..."
"I'm sorry, Katie," she said hoarsely.
"No," I whispered in horror. By the time I'd consciously thought to do it I was already running.
"Katrina no!" Alex screamed out after me. "You can't! Grant said you have to-"
I didn't hear the rest of what Grant said I had to do. I was too far and the sound of my blood pumping drowned everything else out. I ran with everything I had. All I could see in my head were my parents. They're the only people who live that far out. I'd gone to visit after I first woke up.
When I reached their place the door was kicked in, the frame torn to hell. I approached it cautiously. "Mom? Dad?" No one else was hear. I could smell the fading scent of rogues and Grant but neither still here. "Dad?"
I stepped inside and gasped. Everything was torn apart and broken. "Katrina!" Grant said startling me. He came in after me and grabbed my arms. "Katrina go back to the pack house." He tried pulling me back out of the house and that's when I saw the blood on the wall leading back towards the bedroom.
I broke out of Grant's hold and walked down the hall as if I were in a trace. It felt like I was. It felt like this was all just a dream, that none of it was real.
I pushed the already ajar door to their bedroom open. At first I didn't see anything wrong. My parents were laying on the bed as if asleep.
Then I saw their open eyes and the blood on their clothes. "Mom? Dad?" It sounded like a young child talking. I approached the bed and reached out to touch them but my hand froze. I saw writing in the corner of my eye. I turned my head, hand still reaching towards my parents.
The son shall pay for the father's sins.
It was written in red. I walked towards it and touched the edge of the period. It was dried and flaked. I felt sick. The words smelled like... they were written in blood. "Mom, Dad," I gasped and flung myself towards them. I reached my father first and shook his shoulders. "Dad get up!" I crawled onto the bed and reached over to my mother. They were both covered blood, their clothes torn and ripped. "Get up! You need to get up!" My vision blurred with tears. "Please get up," I begged.
"Katrina," Grant said pulling me off the bed and away from my parents. "Katrina, they're gone."
"No!" I screamed and fought against him to get to them. "No, no, no, no, no!" They can't be gone. They can't! They just can't be gone! Suddenly all I could think about was the time I'd lost with them. I'd run away at sixteen. Eight years I never saw or spoke to them. All of that time to make up... All that time to make it up to them, to apologize for what I put them through. My chance can't just be gone. They can't be just gone... "No," I sobbed roughly and collapsed against Grant's arms.
He pulled me to his chest. "I'm sorry," he whispered into my hair. "I'm so sorry, Katrina."
I turned my head away from the bed and pressed my face into his shoulder so he wouldn't see the tear flood down my cheeks. They can't just leave me, leave Tyler. Oh God. Tyler. He doesn't know. "I need to see Tyler," I said in a thick voice.
"Katrina," Grant whispered. "Maybe-"
"It needs to come from me," I said as a new wave of pain hit me. "Before he... It needs to come from me."
"Okay," he said and pulled me up to my feet. "Okay."
I realized later in the car that there was blood on my hands.
I found Tyler with Trina in his room. They both jerked off the bed as if they'd been caught doing something very illegal. "Kate?" Trina said softly when she saw my face.
I'm not sure what she saw I just know I felt shallow and empty. "Tyler, when need to talk." My voice sounded... dead. "Alone."
He frowned. "Whatever it is you can say it in front of Trina."
I shook my head unable to look my brother in the eyes. More tears slipped loose. They traveled down my cheeks and jumped down to the floor. Trina approached me cautiously. I don't think she'd ever seen me cry. After Blackwater crying wasn't something I did often. Almost never really. "Kate? What happened?"
Hadn't I'd been asking Alex that less than an hour ago? "There was a rogue attack," I whispered. I looked up at Tyler. "Mom and Dad... they-they're... dead." My voice broke and I heard Trina's sharp intake of breath.
Tyler shook his head unbelieving. "No, you're lying."
"I wish I was," I murmured as his eyes glaze over.
I knew what he was doing. He was searching for his link to them. A few seconds later the glaze went away. "You're wrong," he growled. "I'm going to go find them, they'll be at home and they'll be fine."
He tried to storm pass me and out the door but my arm snapped out and stopped him. "Trust me, Ty," I whispered. "You don't want to see."
I turned my head to look at him but he was looking down at my hand. My red stained hand. He took a shuddering step back. "No," he whispered much like I had.
Trina came to us glassy eyed with empathy. She knew how we felt. She was an orphan, just like we are now. "I'm so sorry, Tyler," she whispered put her hand on his shoulder.
He shook it off and turned on her angrily. "Don't touch me!"
"Tyler," I gasped.
He glared at me. "You did this! If it weren't for you they would have been living all alone out on the edge of the territory. It's your fault!" He shoved me back into the wall and stormed out.
I fell down to the floor and Trina got down and wrapped her arms around me. "He didn't mean it," she whispered. "He's just-"
"He's right," I whispered horrified. More tears tugged themselves free and I had one of those wild, random, totally inappropriate thoughts where I wondered how long can someone cry before they had no water left for tears.
"No," Trina whispered softly, almost cooing. "No, sweetie this isn't your fault."
"Yes it is," I sobbed. "This never would have happened if I hadn't left. They moved there because they couldn't stand being in our old house. Because I had left! This is my fault."
"No," Trina said strongly as she wiped at my cheeks. She made sure I was looking at her for her next words. "The fault lies with the people who killed them. Not you." Another sob ripped through me and she pulled me to her like Grant had done back at my parent's house. "I'm so sorry, Kate," she whispered.
She wasn't the only one. But their sorry doesn't make it hurt any less.
The funeral was three days later. Closed casket. I hadn't spoken to Grant since that day in their house. Nor had Tyler spoken to me. I kept to myself, only ever talking with my pack mates and even then it was mainly Trina and Tristan. They were the only ones who knew how it felt. Tristan's father had been killed in a Rogue attack when he was a kid, his mom a couple years later to cancer. Normally human diseases don't affect us because of our stronger immune system but heartbreak does a really good job at weakening those.
A lot of people showed for it. My father was a well-liked Beta even after he and my mother cut themselves off from the pack. I stood in front clinging to Tristan's arm as my life support. My parents were Christian and wanted a Christian service. As I child I was as well but I wasn't sure how werewolves really fit into the creation theory.
"As the first man was made from dust," the preacher said, "and the first woman from him and we all hail from Adam and Eve, today we return our fallen brother and sister to dirt. Timothy and Vera Grim will be missed. They were a beloved Beta couple, friends, and parents." His eyes flickered to me and I looked away. Tristan moved and wrapped his arm around me. "They will never be truly gone, they reside in our hearts and we will one day be reunited with them in the afterlife. If the children would like to say anything."
Everyone either looked at me or searched for Tyler. "You don't have to go," Tristan whispered in my ear.
I sniffed, "Yes I do. Tyler's not here and one of us should speak." He gave my shoulders a quick squeeze before I went up. I took a couple seconds to gather myself before speaking. "As you all know I left Silver Moon when I was sixteen." More than a few people shifted and glared but I ignored them. Today wasn't about them. "For nearly eight years I did speak to my parents. That will be my greatest regret. My mother and father were the greatest parents anyone could ask for. They went to every T-ball game, every school recital, every birthday party Tyler and I had. They were an amazing Beta couple to the pack. I could tell you stories about them when I was growing up but the only thing that really matters is that they were loved and the world is a dimmer place without them in it."
It was all I could do to hold back tears as I laid a rose on each of their coffins and made my way back to Tristan. He gave me a warm encouraging smile. "You did well, Kate," he whispered.
I wrapped my arms around his waist and laid my head on his chest. He hugged me back and rubbed my back soothingly. A few more people went up and spoke then everyone laid roses on the coffins. I thought that was it until a couple people started making their way to me.
"I'm so sorry for you lost," a woman I didn't recognize said holding one of my hands in both of hers.
I was too surprised to say anything. Most of the people here didn't like me. She waited a second then left. More and more people came to give me their condolences. A few it was grudgingly and a portion I didn't know or remember.
I was surprised when I did see one familiar face. "Oscar?"
He smiled. The kid cleaned up nicely. He was with a couple about my parents' age who had LT with them. "Hey Kate. This is my aunt and uncle and you've met-"
"LT," I finished and he smiled.
"My parents couldn't make but I wanted to say I'm sorry about your folks," he said sincerely. "I know it can't be easy."
The woman with him handed her son to her husband and stepped forward. "Your parents were good people. We knew them from when Blake was a Lupá¾°tor. They'd be very proud of the person you are."
"Thank you," I replied. "It's nice to see a friendly face."
She gave a mean scowl to a few glaring onlookers. "They'd no right to treat the way they do, especially today."
"People in Silver Moon rarely change," I sighed. "Thank you for coming."
She nodded sadly. "If you need anything at all just ask."
I gave them a forced smile before the left, Oscar giving me a quick hug as he did so. The next people weren't so friendly. Ivanna and Holden Adams. They came to me with smiles so fake they were only out done by the falseness to their kindness. "Katrina, I'm so sorry for the loss of your parents," Ivanna said.
Their presence set my hair on edge. "It's Kate," I said poorly masking my dislike.
Holden's smile tightened ever so slightly. "Well it's fitting that they passed on together. They were truly in love even by mating standards."
He was digging. But for what?
"Ivanna?" a voice laughed bitterly in my head. "I'll let you in on a little secret: Ivanna is not Holden's mate. She never was and never will be."
Somehow I knew it was true, and I knew those two want to know if I remembered. Maybe if I were so plague by grief I would have played dumb but instead I said, "Yes, my parents were true mates, weren't they. Almost as true as you two are."
Holden's eyes narrowed threateningly. I was too emotionally exhausted to deal with the politics of subtlety any longer so I did something that only someone very rude and very stupid does. I turned my back on the Alpha.
It seems like something small but really it's saying that you don't even consider him to be strong enough to be a threat. He growled behind me but didn't dare to retaliate in front of so many witnesses.
"What was that?" Tristan asked as I walked over to him. He was glaring at someone over my shoulder. I give you three guesses who and the first two don't count.
"Nothing," I said leaning into him.
"Are you ready to leave?" he asked thankfully not pressing what'd just happened.
I nodded. "Yes." I gave my parents coffins one last look. "I don't want to go back to the pack house yet."
"Okay," he said kissing the side of my head. "I know a place."
He led me away to my truck. Looking at the car pained me now. I remembered the hours and hours Dad and I spent working on the truck in the garage. I could almost smell the lilies he was always put on the dash to combat the smell of engine oil.
I watched the world zip by as Tristan drove. About twenty minutes later he was pulling into a parking lot. "Where are we?"
"A pancake place," he answered.
I looked at him as if he were crazy. "It's two in the afternoon."
He smiled. "Pancakes are a comfort food. I think you could use a little of that right now. Am I right?"
I gave him watery laugh and nodded. He got out and opened my door for me like a true gentleman. We stuck out like a sore thumb in the restaurant. Everyone looked at us like we didn't belong. I didn't blame them, Tristan still wore his suit and I was still in my formal black dress for the funeral. Yet here we were in the middle of a pancake place at two in afternoon after I buried my parents.
Tristan made a point of talking about anything but that though. He also didn't point out that I was silently crying into my food. To my surprise when we left to drive back to the pack house I actually felt a little better, but it was still be a long time before I was ever okay again. For now I'll settle for better.