Chapter 37: Conflicted

Once my mother was gone, I began to contact our old acquaintances, and before I knew it, chats were organized, urging members to call the police tip line if they knew anything.

When an alert that included Haylee’s picture was released by the news outlets, the chat went wild with people claiming to have spotted her all over the state. I was hopeful at first, but as I scrolled through the comments, I easily debunked most claims.

As I waited for my phone to ring, I fantasized that Haylee would see her face posted all over social media and call me, livid that we had dared to release such an unflattering image. Then we would get into an argument, because this had all been just a silly misunderstanding.

Though I had been praying for my phone to ring, my heart nearly leapt out of my chest when it finally happened.

But I was disappointed to see it was Justin calling.

This time I answered, but only because he volunteered for the police department. Maybe he had received news about Haylee.

“Dharma, are you all right?” he asked as soon as I answered the phone.

“Physically, yes, I’m in one piece.” I had intended on remaining neutral during our call, but my voice cracked as soon as I spoke. “But my heart is breaking, Justin. At first, I thought she had just crashed with some strange guy, but she certainly would have texted me by now.”

“That may still be the case,” Justin said in a comforting tone. “The media moved quick, and now her face is plastered all over the internet. She just may be too embarrassed to come forward.”

I shook my head. “Not Haylee,” I insisted. “She would have at least reached out to her parents.”

I wanted to believe Justin’s theory, but in my heart, I knew it wasn’t true and this was no time for me to entertain my delusions.

“I think she may have attempted to walk to the party on her own and had an accident,” I said.

“May I ask why you decided not to go to the party?” Justin pressed gently.

I wiped at the tears that had escaped the corners of my eyes and cleared my throat. “Because I didn’t want to run into you,” I told him honestly. “After the incident at the concert, I was conflicted and needed some time to think.”

“So, you know about Sienna,” he surmised. “I don’t want to discuss her personal business on the phone, but if you are willing to see me, I can explain.”

“None of that is important right now,” I reminded him firmly.

“You’re right. We can revisit that conversation another time.” He paused. “You told the police Haylee was supposed to meet Toby. Did she text you to let you know she arrived safely?”

“No, but it wasn’t a far walk. Toby confirmed that she reached the bus stop when I spoke to him this morning.”

“I was at that party last night,” Justin said. “Toby made an appearance, but Haylee wasn’t with him.”

“He said they got into a minor argument, and Haylee decided to return to the house,” I told him. “Toby said he lingered behind, hoping that she would change her mind, but when she didn’t, he walked to the party on his own.”

“Do you know what they were arguing about?” Justin inquired.

I was reluctant to share the details of their argument. Haylee had been upset with Toby for not warning me about Justin, and Toby had rightfully defended himself by reminding her that he hardly knew me and had been acquainted with Justin since elementary school.

“They just argued,” I said. “And it resulted in Haylee fleeing back home.”

“Do you believe him?” Justin posed.

My blood ran cold.

Justin was well acquainted with Detective Dunn. He had even called her by her first name. I had to wonder if she had disclosed something to him.

“Do you think Toby did something to her?” I demanded. “Did Detective Dunn tell you something?”

“Slow down,” Justin snapped. “Detective Dunn didn’t tell me anything. I was just speculating, since Toby was the last person to see her.”

“If you hear anything, promise me that you will call me,” I urged him. “Even if it’s something that I may find difficult to hear.”

“I will,” he promised. “I love you, Dharma. Please stay safe.”

I was stunned. I knew this was not the time to be contemplating my romantic life, but my heart had done a flip flop. I should have reciprocated his words, but though I had feelings for Justin, I was not certain that I loved him.

Before I had a chance to resolve my internal conflict, the doorbell rang.

“I have to let you go, Justin,” I said, speaking rapidly as I rushed down the hall. “Someone is at the door.”

I didn’t wait for him to respond as I hung up the phone. I already knew it wasn’t Haylee—she wouldn’t have bothered ringing the doorbell—but the shadowy figure behind the distorted glass may have come bearing information.

I threw open the door and found myself face to face with Toby.

My first instinct was to step aside and invite him in, but I refrained. I didn’t believe Toby had harmed Haylee, but Justin was right; it was strange that Haylee had returned home so abruptly. Haylee had really wanted to go to that party, and she had spent all afternoon trying to convince me to go with her.

“Toby. How are you?” I asked, stepping outside and closing the door behind me.

“I was about to ask you the same thing,” he said with an awkward chuckle as he studied my face.

I didn’t need to see my reflection to know I looked awful. My cheeks were sticky from weeping, and I was pretty sure I had busted a capillary in my right eye when I had dry heaved earlier.

I had been angry with Toby all day. I’d replayed the scenario in my head several times, each time envisioning him insisting that he walk her home. There was no good explanation in the world to explain why he hadn’t.

As if he had read my mind, he said, “Dharma, you can’t imagine how sorry I am. I keep kicking myself for not chasing her down.”

“Why didn’t you?” I asked, my voice heated. “She was a visitor in a strange neighborhood.”

“I thought she was with you,” he insisted. “I loitered for a few minutes, but then Justin’s car passed, so I assumed you had changed your mind and she’d caught a ride with you guys.”

“You saw Justin’s car?” I frowned. “Are you sure?”

“Do you know anyone else in town that drives a McLaren?”

“Did you share that information with the detectives?”

“Of course I did,” Toby said. “But when I saw him at the party later, you weren’t with him. He must have just been taking a shortcut.”

He sighed and shielded his eyes against the setting sun. “Anyway, I just wanted to swing by to make sure you’re okay, but it will be dark soon, so I better get walking.”

I gestured towards the garage. “I can loan you my scooter.”

Toby laughed. “I haven’t ridden one of those things since middle school.”

“It’s like riding a bike, you never forget,” I countered.

“You must have been an awful bike rider,” Toby quipped, reminding me of my wipeout.

I laughed, which surprised me, considering how awful I felt. Toby leaned in and offered me a hug, which I gratefully accepted, because I feared once the moment was over, I would start crying again.

“They will find her, Dharma.”

Justin had been feeling skeptical about Toby, but as I rested in his arms, I couldn’t imagine feeling any safer. He was the first one to withdraw, since I was reluctant to release him.

“Get home safely!” I called out as he started down my walkway.

He offered me a little wave before he turned in the same direction Haylee had traveled the night before.