Chapter 44: Chapter 44

Sanoske lets me slide down his body. His hands linger on my hips, his forehead resting against mine. His breath comes out in heavy pants.

“Come with me.”

He doesn’t wait for my response. He snatches up the dagger, a semiautomatic, and our jackets. He throws one over his shoulders and helps me into the other.

Then he takes my hand and we’re running down the tunnel. My heart pounds with excitement. He leads me to the entrance, to the staircase, where he starts pulling me up into the darkness.

My thighs strain a bit from the effort, but I can’t focus on that. All I see is Sanoske, his smiles in the darkness, his warm hand in mine. He pushes open the heavy, rusty door, and we step out into the night.

The air is fresh and humid, a soft breeze whistling past us. I gasp. Above us, a huge white moon hangs in the sky, lighting up the ocean waves as they crash against the white cliffs.

Sanoske points at the sky. I follow his gaze and see millions of stars scattered across the darkness. A lightness fills my chest. For a moment, I forget about my worries, my fears.

Then I turn to look at Sanoske, his face also turned towards the stars. My heart skips a beat.

“This way,” Sanoske murmurs, guiding me through the ruins to a long stone path that leads down the cliffs.

He holds my hand as we make our way slowly down to the water. The breeze whips through my hair, making me shiver. I can taste the salt on my tongue.

Sanoske leads me to the bottom of the path. The white cliffs tower above us, ghostly and beautiful in the moonlight. He jumps down from the end of the path to some small, dark stones.

He reaches his hands up to me, and I step into his embrace. He holds me above him for a second, looking up at me, then gently sets me down.

I look out at the ocean. It roars back at me, sending huge waves into the air. They crash back down, racing towards our feet.

“It’s so powerful,” I say, breathless.

Sanoske nods in the darkness. He takes my hand and leads me to a couple of larger stones.

“Take your shoes off,” he says, kicking off his own boots.

I see his white teeth flash in the moonlight as he grins. I blink at him, then glance at the ocean.

“What are you planning?” I ask him quietly.

He grins at me. “Don’t you trust me?”

“I don’t really have a choice,” I answer, and he laughs.

“Trust me, Alex.” He winks at me.

I lean down slowly to remove my shoes. Too slowly for Sanoske. He picks me up suddenly and plops me down on one of the larger stones. Then he’s kneeling in front of me and pulling my shoes off.

“Sanoske!”

I watch wide-eyed as he straightens up and grabs me. I can only hold on tightly as he sprints towards the water, stopping just before the bubbles as it races up to meet us.

He puts me down and wraps his arm around my waist, holding me tightly as I watch the water approach.

It hits our ankles, icy cold, lifting the stones at our feet, and then races away again. I watch in wonder as it gathers in a greater wave and comes rushing back again.

I find myself reaching out to Sanoske. He holds me tightly against his body, breathing heavily. My body slowly sinks into the pebbles.

“Did you grow up in a place like this?” I ask finally.

He glances down at me.

“It was very different, but the ocean always smells the same,” he replies softly.

He turns to me and caresses my cheek softly. I lean into him. He bows his head and kisses my forehead gently.

“Do you want to go for a swim?” he asks me gently.

I blink up at him. “Swim? In the ocean?”

“Yes.”

“I can’t swim.”

“I will keep you safe.” He smiles.

I blink at him. “I can’t get my clothes wet. They’re all I have.”

I glance down at my roughly tailored outfit. Sanoske’s gaze follows mine.

“I can always find you more clothes,” he murmurs. “Or you can take them off to swim. The sun will dry you off.”

He points to the horizon. In the distance, I can see the sky lightening.

“Okay.”

Sanoske takes my hand and leads me further back to the larger stones where we left our shoes. I watch as he pulls his jacket and shirt off, tossing them onto the stone.

He slides his sword off his belt and places it gently between the rocks. Then he pulls his pants off in one swift movement, wearing only his underwear. His taut skin gleams in the moonlight.

I find myself wanting to touch him and trace my fingers up his chest. I reach out, but he grabs my wrist.

“Your turn,” he says softly, his dark eyes gazing into mine.

I nod once and shrug my jacket off. I untie the knot of my shirt and pull it off over my head. Then I unfasten my belt, and my pants fall down on their own. I step out of them as delicately as I possibly can.

Sanoske watches me, his eyes moving slowly over my body.

“You really are perfect, aren’t you?” he says, closing the distance between us in a second.

His warm skin presses against mine, and his hands move over my body, down my arms, down my waist, and over my hips. Then he slides his hand under my legs and picks me up in a smooth movement.

Before I can cry out, he’s sprinting for the water, a wild look in his eye. He crashes into the waves, his grip on me growing tighter.

The water is colder than I had anticipated, biting at my naked skin. I gasp in shock as Sanoske dives under the black waves. The cold water is all around me, in my ears, up my nose.

I open my eyes, but everything is dark. Then I feel Sanoske’s arm around my waist pulling me back up.

We break through the surface. I sputter as the cold air slaps my wet face. I grip onto Sanoske’s frame, my arms interlacing around his neck, my legs around his waist.

“Wow, that was awful!” I shudder, glaring down at him. Sanoske’s got me in his arms, his hands resting under my thighs, his face soft.

“That was invigorating,” he counters, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. I can’t help but stare at his lips.

The wind picks up a bit. His eyes scan the horizon, watching the dark waves roll slowly toward us. I hold on to him tighter.

He buries his face in my neck, pressing warm kisses against my salty skin. I tighten my arms around him and look out over the black ocean.

“Don’t worry. I’ve got you,” he whispers. When I look down at him, his dark eyes meet mine. “I love you, Alex.”

“You do?”

“Yeah.”

He grins at me, almost shyly. I feel his fingers tighten on my thighs, lifting me higher out of the water.

“I’ve been so happy these past few days,” he says. “Knowing I’d come back to you, that I’d get to hold you.”

He doesn’t look away from me.

“I’m not a good man, Alex, I’m a soldier. I’ve done some terrible things. But you make me want to be better. Now I picture a future with you in it. And I can’t shake that image.”

He walks us slowly out of the waves, speaking softly. I feel my body getting heavier, but he holds me tight and I wrap myself around him completely.

“I just want to whisk you away from here. Keep you above all the pain. I just want to hold you all night without worrying that I can’t keep you safe.”

“Sanoske,” I say. He carries me out of the water, his eyes on the rocks where we left our clothes.

“You’re so pure. I see you trying to embrace Albion, trying to love a country that doesn’t love you back. I want to take you away from all of it. To make you happy.”

He stops when we reach the rocks, still holding me up. I keep my legs wrapped around his waist.

“I don’t know what I’d give to have that with you, Alex. I’m scared of what I’d do. I love you.”

He sets me down gently, and my wet feet cling to the cool rocks. Sanoske stands over me, his hands on my hips.

“I want that with you too,” I say, my heart pounding.

Sanoske lets out a small groan and pulls me into his arms, pressing me against him, crashing his lips onto mine.

Suddenly, he’s everywhere. His fingers trace my hips, up to my waist, to my collarbone. His other hand holds the back of my neck, keeping my face to his.

My skin prickles with goosebumps, and my heart races in my chest. I reach up to pull him closer, pressing my body into his.

He lifts me up again. I wrap my legs around him, and he holds my thighs as I pull him closer. I feel him setting me down on the rock; the cold, smooth surface feels good.

He pulls back just enough to grab my thighs and pull me closer. His lips trail down my throat, and I find myself gasping for breath.

My whole body feels hot, and I can’t control the small sounds escaping me. Sanoske grips my hips, pulling me closer, running his fingers up my back, his lips up my throat.

I run my fingers down his back. His wet skin is warm. He lets out a small groan and pulls back from me, his eyes wide.

“We need to stop here, Alex,” he says, panting. “I need a break, or I won’t be able to stop.”

“We don’t have to stop,” I say, my breath coming out in heaves. I glance at the dark sky above us, the rays of sunshine on the horizon. “I don’t want to stop.”

I look back at his feverish expression.

“You sure?” he asks.

“I’ve never been more sure,” I admit, feeling my cheeks heat up slightly.

“Here?”

“Here is perfect.”

Sanoske doesn’t need any more confirmation. His hand slides over my hip and pulls my body to his again. He gently unclips my bra and lets it fall to the ground.

Incredibly slowly, he kisses down my chest, stroking, nuzzling, and sucking my skin.

“I love you so much,” he murmurs, pulling my lips to his again, and I lose myself completely.

His touch is gentle but firm, hard but confident. I am powerless. My whole body is hit with waves of pure pleasure, I can barely hold on to him. I never want him to stop.

I never knew it could feel like this. My heart feels full for the first time in years, and I can’t stop the tears that spring to my eyes as he holds me to his chest when we finish.