Chapter 23: Chapter 23

Time seems to blur together. I watch as the candle burns down slowly, only to be replaced. I spend most of my time sleeping, and when I wake, the petite woman is there with soup and water. The man with the blue eyes helps me sit up to eat.

Until one day, I can sit up on my own. The woman starts to give me small pieces of vegetables and fruits.

I wake up to a sharp pain in my stomach. I know where the toilet is. Well, what I’ve been using as a toilet: a shallow aluminum bowl in the corner of the room.

The candle is burning brightly, which means someone just left the room. They won’t be back for a while.

My body screams in protest as I slowly pull myself into a sitting position and swing my legs off the side of the bed.

I look down at my thin, white legs. I see my muscles, hard and tight against my bones. I’ve never seen muscles like that on me before.

I let one foot drop to the ground, then the other, and I gently lift myself up. At first, I can’t support my weight and fall back onto the bed.

Biting down on my bottom lip, I pick myself up again and manage to stay standing for a few seconds. My heart pounds with the effort, and my head spins.

With determination, I stumble toward the bowl. Each step brings pain, but it also becomes easier as my body remembers how to walk again. I let out a sigh of relief when I reach the bowl.

After taking care of my needs, I drag myself back to the bed and collapse. I fall back to sleep, feeling incredibly proud of myself.

***

I wake up to the sound of hushed voices. The people I’ve started to recognize are all in the room.

The petite woman is standing closest to me, while the Crippled men, the blue-eyed man, and another woman with no visible defects stand behind her.

There are others too, in the doorway. I can’t make out their faces, only hear their voices. They all fall silent when they see I’m awake. I slowly lift myself into a sitting position, and they all watch me intently.

“Girl, did anyone help you to the bowl?” the petite woman asks me in a stern tone.

I look at her and gently shake my head. She turns to face the others. A ripple of grunts passes through them, and they look at me.

“She can’t talk. It’s not worth it. She’s taken up too much of our time, effort, and food. She’s still weak and useless,” the short man declares.

“She’s been here for weeks now. She still can’t talk,” the mouth-breather agrees.

“It’s not like she can’t talk. She probably just chooses not to,” the blue-eyed man replies, frowning slightly. The woman beside him raises her eyebrows in curiosity.

“To be honest, when you dragged her in, I thought she was a goner,” the petite woman says to the blue-eyed man. She turns to face me.

“I didn’t expect you to live. You were way past starving, and you were sick. I didn’t think you’d make it through the first night. But you did. You’re a fighter.”

I nod once. The petite woman looks back at the others.

“You see, she’s just like us,” she says, but the others don’t look convinced.

I cough once and clear my throat. My tongue feels thick and heavy, but I manage to find my voice. “Her name is Beth,” I say.

They look at me, wide-eyed.

“Who is Beth?” asks the blue-eyed man. I can tell he’s been wondering about this for a while.

“My daughter,” I whisper. “I have to save her.”

They glance at each other. “Who are you?” the petite woman asks.

“Alexandra 958,687,487.64.4.2.1,” I answer automatically.

There’s a long silence, and I see their eyes widen. Suddenly they start to shout and argue all at once. Some yell at me, and others yell at each other. The ones in the back yell as well.

Only the petite woman by my side is silent. She holds my gaze for a few long seconds, then turns around.

“Shut up! All of you, shut up!” she yells.

They all fall silent. The short man sighs deeply. “She’s not one of us,” he says.

“No.” The petite woman shakes her head. “No, she’s not. But she’s not one of them either, is she?” she says, turning back around to face me. I slowly shake my head.

“Sector 64,” the other woman whispers. “That’s almost three hundred kilometers away. Did you walk all that way? For your daughter?”

I nod once. She blinks at me.

“Well, she can’t stay here!” the mouth-breather says.

The petite woman ignores him. “What do you want us to call you?” she asks me.

“Alex. My name is Alex,” I reply.

She nods firmly.

“I’m Ellen. This is Thomas, my partner. Rob and Ida, and her son, Liam.” She points to the people in the room, from the mouth-breather to the blue-eyed man.

“We live here in this house. The people out there live in other houses. There are thirty-seven of us living here. We work in the steel factory down the road,” she tells me.

“You’re workers,” I conclude.

They nod, scowling. I close my eyes for a moment, then open them again.

“They’ll notice if she stays here,” Thomas says.

“Yes, she can’t stay here,” Rob agrees.

“Then where can she go? She’ll die out there again,” Liam snaps.

“I can’t stay here,” I tell them gently.

They all look at me, wide-eyed.

“You’ll die out there,” Liam repeats.

“I’ll find a way to survive. I need to find Beth.”

“Who’s Eric?” he demands. I flinch at the name. “A lover? Is he waiting for you?”

“No,” I say, pressing my lips together. “I can’t stay here.”

“I agree,” Rob chimes in.

“Maybe. But for now, she can’t go anywhere,” Ellen counters, her gaze fixed on me.

“She must be tired. We should let her rest,” Ida suggests, placing her hand on Rob’s arm. He lets her lead him out of the room.

The others follow suit, drifting away from the door. The petite woman sighs and exits with Thomas trailing behind her. After a while, only Liam remains. He takes a seat on the bed and lets out a heavy sigh. I watch him.

“So, you were one of them? Until when?”

“Until I ran away,” I admit, letting out a breath.

He gives a single nod. “How old are you?”

“Almost twenty,” I answer.

He nods again. “How old is your daughter?”

“Seventeen months,” I respond. “I think.”

“So you ran from those places?”

I hesitate. He glances up at me.

“Yes. I want my daughter back. They took her from me.”

“How are you going to find her?”

“I’m going to keep looking.”

“Don’t you want to stop? She’s not in bad hands. There could be worse places for her than a school. Here is a bad place to grow up, for example. I would know. You could hide here. There’s no chance of finding her. Not really.”

I look at him, and he quickly averts his gaze.

“I can’t stop looking for her. She’s all I have to live for, and I won’t have her manipulated her whole life like I was,” I declare.

He’s silent for a moment. “Who is Eric?” he finally asks.

“A Master,” I answer.

His head jerks up and his eyes meet mine with intensity. “A Master?”

“My Master, the one who’s been with me since my Testing.”

“Your Master?”

“I’ve said too much.”

I look away. He’s silent for a while, then I feel his hand on mine.

“You shouldn’t leave. They don’t hate you, you know. You will be safer here than out there. If I hadn’t heard that shot, they would probably have found you first. You can’t survive out there alone. Stay here.”

“I’d like to sleep now,” I say, turning away from him and lying down. I hear him sigh, then stand up and walk toward the door.

“Think it over,” he advises before disappearing.

***

“My mother stayed with them for about six months. It wasn’t long before she was walking around and exploring again. She felt confined and lonely in her little room.

“At first, she only paced around the room. Then with Liam’s guiding arms, she explored the rest of the house. A small kitchen, a living room where they all slept, and a broken part of the house that they didn’t like entering.

“They walked outside without gas masks. The workers knew well that the air wasn’t toxic, they merely wore masks around Perfects to make it seem they were oblivious.

“My mother insisted on pulling her own weight as soon as she could work on her own again. She was moved out of the sick room and into the living room with the rest of them after Rob came down with a cough.

“To my mother, it was warmer at night to sleep with others anyway. Liam held her in his arms to keep her warm as well.

“She knew what he wanted from her, what he could give her, but her drive for Beth was stronger than her desire to stay with him for the rest of her life.

“Since she didn’t have any skills apart from making weapons and some sewing, she was quite useless to the workers at first. Only Ellen had any patience for her.

“She taught her how to clean the house, how to wash clothing, and how to cook food. My mother found a certain delight in cooking.

“There was never much food…vegetables, fruits, some flour, some sugar, some nuts. The food came from the Masters who worked them. They were paid in food; the more work, the more food.

“But there’s only so much work one can do, and feeding an extra and starving mouth did put a considerable strain on the family.

“Rob and Thomas warmed to her slightly, especially when they came home from work and she had all the food prepared and the house clean and the clothes washed and dry.

“She worked hard to make it so that no one had any work to do when they came back home. It was the very least she could do for them.

“Every day she grew stronger, she delighted in her newfound strength. She was no longer slowed down, with milk in her breasts and wide soft hips. What once was a soft, curvy young girl had turned into a strong young woman.

“She was covered in scars, and her muscles were hard and powerful. But to Liam’s delight more than hers, she did keep a strongly curved body and a full chest.

“She found a certain joy in running. Each morning when the others left for work, she would pull on her soldier boots and light clothing, pieces of cloth that she sewed together, and go running.

“At first, she only ran around the village. But each day she began to go further out. She listened to the hard thump of her feet against the dead earth, watched the sunrise on the horizon. She ran with the sun, racing the sun.

“When she got back, her legs would ache, but she found she was stronger. She felt powerful, and she slept well. She wondered why she had never been like this before.

“I thought back to all those girls and women she had known her whole life. Soft women with wide hips and big busts. Slow women with big eyes and nimble fingers. She was glad she wasn’t like that anymore.

“One day, she discovered the clothes she’d stolen from the soldiers. They had been cleaned and stored on a low shelf. She changed back into them.

“The gray dress Ida had lent her reminded her too much of her time in the Masters’ house, and the soldiers’ clothes reminded her of her duty to find Beth.

She tailors the clothes to her body, snipping and stitching until they hug her form just right, allowing her to move with ease. She stumbles upon the revolver, tucked away beneath the kitchen sink.

A smile tugs at her lips. It feels good to have it back in her possession.