Chapter 37: Puck Me Secretly: Chapter 36

THE PLAYERS MEETING DRONED ON. I sat at the back and stifled a yawn. The team had been on the road for 3 games and we only had tomorrow night’s game before we headed into a five-day break for Christmas.

I felt someone staring at me. I lifted my head from my page and my gaze clashed with Max’s intense blue stare. I ducked my head over my book, feeling heat wash over my face.

Mom had lied. Nothing was okay.

After my talk with Mom, I had spent a fitful night debating how to handle this situation with Max. Mom was right. If Max got cut from our team, the odds of him being picked up from another team would be slim. He needed a full year, proving himself on and off the ice, to ensure the longevity of his career. And if Dad got a hint of anything between us, he would get rid of Max. Max was a rebel at heart, and being told that he couldn’t be with me, might make him want to be with me just to thumb his nose at authority.

Did I need to say anything? Besides our hotel time together after the crash, we had only kissed twice. So why did it feel like there was so much more between us?

It was all the other stuff. The way he held my hand under the blanket whenever the plane took off. How he’d come to my room to check up on me after Minnesota. The way he stared at me from across the room. It was all the little ways he acted that made this so difficult.

I needed to protect him, but I needed to do so without letting him know what I was protecting him from.

So, I took the cowards way out. For the last week, I returned to avoiding him like my life depended on it. I didn’t talk to him. I didn’t flirt. Hell, I didn’t even look at him. If we spent no alone time together, he’d be safe. It felt like a rotten thing to do, since he’d done nothing wrong, but I needed to keep him safe.

The only problem was that Max didn’t seem to get the hint. Anyone else would react to being so obviously blown off and would back off. Not Max. He never approached me, but he watched me every chance he got.

I peered up at him through my eyelashes. His unblinking gaze stared back.

I dropped my head forward, letting my hair curtain in front of my face. He was making this so difficult. All I wanted to do was be near him. Pushing him away was my version of torture.

The meeting broke up. I gathered my stuff and moved out of the hotel conference room. I almost made it to the elevator when a strong hand grabbed my arm and steered me around the corner.

“What are you doing?” I anxiously peeked around Max’s shoulder, scared that someone would see us talking.

“Why are you avoiding me?”

I met his gaze and lied my ass off. “I’m not.”

“Bullshit.”

“Just… don’t.”

“What happened? You’ve been weird ever since the Christmas party.”

“I’m not weird.”

“Tell me what is going on.”

I felt emotionally exhausted. I knew this was the right thing for him, but his anger-laced hurt was gutting me. My only move was to step around him towards the elevator, punching the button several times. He didn’t follow, and I made my escape to my room.

For the hundredth time, I reminded myself that I was doing this for him. To protect him.

I missed the shared team lunch, and in an act of rebellion, decided I’d skip the afternoon practice too. I answered only necessary emails before collapsing on my hotel bed for a nap.

I WOKE up with a dry mouth and noticed that I had also slept through the team dinner. I did not care. I took a hot bath, shrugged on the robe over my naked body and then ordered room service. I needed to get through one more night, one more flight and then I’d have five days off, away from this team, and away from Max.

A knock sounded on my door.

I swung it open. Max stood there, a dark expression on his face.

His presence bewildered me. “What’s going on?”

“Can I come in?”

That was a bad idea. But having him standing in the hallway was an even worse idea. I opened the door wider, and he walked in. He moved to lean against the desk, his arms crossed. Max was in a mood.

“I’m not leaving here until you tell me the truth.”

“What truth?”

“The truth about why you did a 180 and fucked off.”

Oh. That truth. “I’ve been busy.”

“Bullshit.” His eyes narrowed on my face. “What did your mom say about me?”

“What makes you think she said anything?”

“She busted us at the party and next thing I know, you can’t even look at me.”

“That’s not what happened.”

“What did she say about me?” The tendons of Max’s muscles stood out and his jaw clenched.

I realized Max thought I was avoiding him because of something Mom had said about him. Something bad or unsavory. Which made me feel terrible.

“Nothing. She said nothing about you,” my voice wavered.

His eyes narrowed. “She wants you to be with Calder. Someone with a pedigree, is that right?”

I shook my head.

“Tell me you’re not dating that Baby Boy.”

It was in that moment I knew Max meant what he said. He wouldn’t leave the room until he wrangled the truth out of me. A truth I couldn’t afford to share.

So, I implied a lie. “Calder’s a family friend.”

“He’s a drugged up punk who doesn’t deserve you.”

I avoided his gaze and shrugged.

Painful and cold silence ticked between us. Matching the beat of my bruised and sore heart.

“Answer this one question and then I’ll leave.”

My eyes met his outraged expression.

“Have you slept with him yet?”

I’d rather be celibate for the rest of my life before I slept with Calder. “Not yet.”

Max’s nostrils flared as he worked to get his emotions under control.

With my arms crossed, I watched him. I felt horrible for how this was ending. I hated that I was hurting him and I hated that whatever was between us, I was killing with my lies. But I was doing this for him. As pissed off as he was, losing hockey would be a million times worse. We’d never be able to survive that. And then he’d have nothing.

He pushed off the desk, and his eyes, dark and stormy, pierced mine when he passed me towards the door.

I took a deep shuddery breath and followed him to lock the door behind him. I tried to think of something, anything to say that would make him feel better, but redemption was impossible after this conversation. Max had shown me nothing but kindness and now I was throwing his friendship in his face so I could allegedly choose Calder over him.

He reached to open the door, but his hand paused on the handle. I faltered behind him, unsure of what verbal scorn he’d unleash on me. Whatever he had to say, I deserved it and more.

He stared down at me. His eyes were like blue diamonds, glittering like hot ice. He took a step towards me.

I stepped back.

He kept coming until my back was flat against the wall. He towered over me, staring down at me, with those angry hot eyes. He planted the palm of his hand against the wall beside my head. A total dominant move. A thrill shot into my gut.

“This is complete fucking bullshit.”

My lips parted as my brain tried to think of some words.

“Don’t,” his lip curled. “I don’t want to hear it.”

He traced a finger down my lips, pausing so that one finger pressed against my mouth as if to hush me. Our eyes met.

He reminded me of a wolf. Big. Hungry. Aggressive. And such a fucking turn on.

His eyes were on my mouth. “Do you think your drugged up Baby Boy can satisfy you the way I can?”

Not a chance in hell. I didn’t answer but my wide eyes remained on his face.

“Drop your robe,” he growled.

“Why?” I whispered over the furious pounding of my heart.

“Because I’m going to give you something to remember when he tries to make you come.”

I swallowed. I was naked beneath my robe. This was madness. I should tell him to leave. I tried to remember why I had been pushing him away in the first place.

“Now,” he commanded.

My hands fumbled with the robe belt. The robe fell slightly open. Delicious tension quivered in my stomach. I hesitated.

I shouldn’t be doing this. I should ask him to leave. This can’t happen.

I glanced up at his beautiful, hard-to-read face and then shrugged my shoulders, letting the robe slide off my naked body and puddle at my feet.

Two huge warm hands grabbed me around the waist and spun me around, pushing me against the wall. I gasped as I felt him step in closer. The heat of his warm chest through his t-shirt pressed against my naked back. With infinite gentleness he brushed my long hair away from my back, over my shoulder.

His voice was low in my ear. “God, you’re so fucking beautiful.”

My body tightened in response.

“Now I’m going to show you what it means to get properly fucked.”

A shiver wracked my body.

His fingertips trailed down my arms. And he captured my wrists in his grasp. I inhaled sharply as he brought my hands up, and placed them above my head, flat against the wall.

“Spread your legs for me.”

It took two breaths before I had the guts to move my legs apart.

“That’s it,” his lips were on my back, trailing kisses across my shoulder.

I arched, quivering when I felt his teeth graze the skin of my shoulder.

“Tonight, I’m going to control every inch of you.” He sucked my earlobe into his mouth. “After tonight, no matter who you’re with, you’ll only think of me.”

One big hand slid around my neck, and I felt his hand gently squeeze my neck. I could feel the pulse of my heartbeat under the pressure of his thumb. It was a move designed to dominate, to let me know he was in charge. My entire body trembled with responding lust.

I whimpered when I felt him kick out one of my legs, forcing me to spread my legs open wider. I felt so vulnerable. So exposed.

“I usually like to draw things out, torture a bit, but right now I feel impatient. I want to feel you come all over my fingers. Hard and fast.”

“What?” I blinked, my eyes opening wide.

I cried out when I felt his hand slide between my legs. He didn’t give me a chance to process. He buried his fingers into me. His fingers plundered me the way I imagined he would fuck me. Primal, greedy and demanding.

Oh my god.

My entire body reacted. I was on my tippy toes, arching back, my head against his chest, and his fingers were relentless, rough and wild; pushing me into a frenzy. He was driving me to the point of madness.

“That’s it,” his stubble rasped against my neck. “You’re so hungry for it, aren’t you? You want it so bad from someone who knows how to actually fuck.”

My legs were shaking and my head pressed hard against his chest as my body tightened like a bow. I couldn’t contain my need. I was moaning, my hands curling against the wall, and still his magnificent fingers impaled me, moving at an impossible speed.

“Do you like it when I fuck you like this? I can feel you clenching around my fingers. So hot, so tight, so wet,” he murmured in my ear.

I responded with a choked noise. I was so close. So close.

“Come for me. Come all over my fingers,” he commanded as his hand tightened around my neck.

A half scream escaped my lips as I felt my universe fly apart. I exploded. My body shuddered and quaked as my orgasm rolled through me.

I clung to that wall, panting like I had run a marathon, while my body twitched and trembled.

“That was just to get you warmed up, so you’re hot and ready for my cock,” his voice was hoarse.