"....Fever..."
"Ella...."
"...Strong."
Voices were nothing but a distant echo as Ella shifted between consciousness. She had become so numb from the emotion of the past few weeks that any pain or illness went unnoticed.
"Please..."
Fighting through the haze in her mind seemed impossible. She could barely distinguish the voices that pleaded to her. As her mind raced, Ella felt a gentle kiss on her forehead as a hand lightly brushed her own.
"James?" She croaked.
"Shhh. Rest."
How long had it been since that day in the rain, when her eyes were last opened, she did not know. But finally Ella's eyelids cracked opened to a dim blurriness that covered her childhood room. Ella's eyes slowly adjusted to seeing light for the first time in who knows how long. She noticed the curtains drawn of what she perceived as a foggy summer morning. While the crackling of a dying fire filled her ears, Ella's eyes focused on the figure sitting at the windowsill bench.
What Ella had first believed to be a figment of her fever induced imagination was in fact real. James sat on the bench with his back against the wall, eyes looking out to the mist filled garden outside. He had yet to noticed her awakening as he appeared lost in his own thoughts, something Ella was glad for as her own drifted between one another. When she finally steeled herself to speak all that came out was a raspy cough. James moved without hesitation and carefully brought a cup of water to her dry, cracked lips.
"Drink slowly and try not to speak quite yet."
Ella took a few small sips hoping to relieve the scratchy feeling in her throat, only to spit the water back up due to the pain to which she imagined resembled swallowing glass. James softly wiped her chin with a cloth at her less than graceful attempt at drinking. His eyes roamed her face, and Ella could see the shadow of a beard along his jaw and his usually bright blue eyes tired and dimmed. Most striking to her was the relief filled within them.
"I should inform your parents you are awake and call for the doctor." His voice sounding as tired as he looked as he rose from the bed. Ella reached out weakly to grab his arm.
"Please... just..." She rasped out and he lifted her hand from his arm. Just as Ella believed he would walk away, James deftly climbed into the bed beside her, bringing her head to his warm, firm chest.
"Thank..."
His fingers lightly traced her arm. "There is no need, I will be here as long as you need." She drifted back to sleep wrapped in his strong arms, feeling any previous fear slip away with her consciousness.
******
When Ella next woke it was to the feeling of a damp cloth gently wiping her forehead. Her eyes slowly fluttered open to see Jane leaning over her with a soft smile. A slight squeeze to her hand caused Ella to look to the opposite side of the bed to see her mother with tears of relief in her eyes. "Oh Ella, you do not know how happy I am to see those emeralds of yours."
Ella managed a soft smile before looking over her mother's shoulder to find Becca sitting by the window with a forced smirk. "Ella must you always be so dramatic?"
"I will be sure that next time death attempts to take me I will do so with less theatrics."
A surprising burst of laughter from Jane caused Ella to chuckle, although in her weakened state a fit of coughing quickly took over. "Apologies My Lady it was inappropriate of me to laugh."
"Dear do not ever apologize for laughter especially after all the sorrow we have faced." Mrs. Hunter said while reaching across to rest a hand on Jane's.
"There is no such thing as inappropriate in this household, only well times distractions." Becca stated.
"Something as you can see I am quite an expert at."
"Ella..."
"Mother..."
The two shared a knowing smile, one that faded quicker than Ella hoped as questions formed in her mind. Ella let out a harsh breath before she propped herself up with Jane's assistance. "I know I should ask, but I am not sure I wish to know the answer."
Mrs. Hunter and Becca shared a look before the latter joined her beside the bed. Becca sat down and placed a hand on Ella's leg in a show of comfort.
"That bad than." Ella stated more than asked.
"Had you not been feeling well prior to this?" Mrs. Hunter asked.
"To be honest I had not been feeling much of anything."
Mrs. Hunter looked at Ella with sad eyes before engulfing her in a hug. We she released Ella, she looked to Becca who exhaled a large breath. "You suddenly stopped when we were running in the yard. I called out to you, but you just... dropped. I tried to wake you.... you did not move... you were so paled and there was...." Becca choked up mid sentence as tears ran down her cheeks. Ella looked to her mother, who was gently rubbing circles on Becca's back. Ella shifted uncomfortably in bed as she tried to figure out what could have caused her friend such distress.
"Mother? What exactly happened?" Ella asked, the confusion clear in her voice.
Mrs. Hunter steeled herself before looking her daughter in the eyes while grasping her hand. "Your father and I heard Becca scream and ran outside as fast as we were able. When we saw you, you looked so lifeless. I collapsed in horror and thought the worst until I dragged myself closed." She shuddered a breath before continuing, "The bottom of your dress was covered in blood. I am so sorry my love." She paused once more to collect herself. "You were with child and lost it."
Ella felt as if all the air had left the room. Her breath hitched as she attempted to swallow a lump in her throat and her lungs tightened as if her chest was closing in. Without warning a sudden grief overtook Ella and she began to cry as if her soul had been ripped from her body. Although the three ladies present in the room tried to console her, Ella felt alone with the massive weight of emotions overwhelming her. It did not take long in her current state to tire out and return to another slumber.
******
Night had fallen when Ella stirred from her grief induced sleep. Candles flickered barely lighting the large room. From what she could tell they were only recently lit letting her know she did not sleep long. Mrs. Hunter still took residence in the chair beside the bed quietly knitting.
"How long have I been here?"
"Just over two weeks. The doctor did not believe you would survive, but became hopeful when your fever broke. Of course we all knew you are too stubborn to leave us and it was all we had to keep your father from punching the doctor square in the face." She smiled without it reaching her eyes and Ella reached to squeeze her hand in reassurance. They both sat in silence just enjoying each others presence.
"Is James still here?" Ella suddenly asked.
"Yes."
"When did you send word?"
Mrs. Hunter repositioned herself on the chair and looked away. "You did send word to Hamsfield Manor I had taken ill did you not?"
"Of course we did."
"Mother."
She sighed dramatically and leaned back in the chair. "We send word the day after you took ill. Jane had said that a member of the staff she writes to mentioned Lord Winters was in town as of last week. Which if true would have added an extra day for it to be delivered."
"If he was in London it would take two days to receive word, and if he left right away two to arrive. What am I missing?"
"He arrived the day after the message was sent with no idea of your condition. Which suggests he left London before the message was even sent."
Ella rested her head against the headboard and looked at the ceiling. She was not sure whether she should be happy by the news or not. Admittedly she was curious about what brought James here without cause. "Did he say why he came?"
"No, but when we told him what happened he seemed... He seemed devastated. Heartbroken if I may say."
"Not surprisingly after losing a potential heir."
Ella studied her mother, who had fallen quiet, her face turned away almost guilty. "You did not tell him about the child?"
"No."
"May I ask why?"
"Your father and I did not see the point in it. Your marriage was already in a difficult state and we were concerned what this would add."
"Regardless he had a right to know!"
"Ella his foolishness caused the stress to you that nearly cost you your life!" Mrs. Hunter hunched over and began to cry. For a moment Ella had forgotten all the pain her mother must had been feeling, not knowing if her daughter would survive.
"I am sorry mother. But you must know it was unkind to hide this from him."
"You are right, but you must understand we did not wish to cause him more pain at the time."
"I should speak with him."
"You need to rest or at the very least eat something."
Ella shook her head, "No. This cannot wait any longer that it has."
Mrs. Hunter nodded sadly and rose from her chair, giving Ella a hug before leaving the room. She looked up to the ceiling once more as she prepared herself for the door to open once more and the most difficult conversation of her life.