Chapter 34: Forged in Blood: Chapter 32

After pulling up the hood of my raincoat, I slip out of my dorm building and make my way toward the library. Raindrops bounce at my feet, and my boots splash through the puddles as I pick up my pace. I usually enjoy walking in the rain, but this downpour is torrential. Even the quad is empty, but that’s no surprise, given that it’s Saturday and there isn’t much of a reason for people to be out and about if they don’t have to be. I suspect most students are cozy in their dorm rooms, hanging out with friends or snuggled up in their beds with a warm body to keep them company.

Sucking in a stuttering breath, I choke back the sob that threatens to escape. I’ve done enough crying over those jerkwads. They don’t deserve a single tear. So why do I feel like my heart has been torn out of my chest and trampled by a herd of rhinos, leaving a black hole in its place? A black hole of despair that threatens to pull me in and consume me every time I picture their faces. Every time I recall Xavier’s unhinged laugh, Axl’s scowl, or how Malachi’s green eyes twinkle when he smiles.

Sharp pain stabs my chest, and I press my hand over my heart. It’s still there. Still beating even though it wants to stop. Even though I want nothing more than to sink to the ground and curl into a ball until the rain washes me away. And it could. Nobody would notice I was gone. Anger and despair crash into me again, and I tip my face to the sky as I slow my pace, letting the rainwater cleanse some of it, some of me, away.

But as angry as I am with those assholes, I’m beyond livid with myself for believing them. For allowing them to make me feel like that seventeen-year-old girl again, sobbing in the dressing room while flames swirled around me. Because I made myself a promise that day—that if I got out of that room alive, I would never allow anyone to have that kind of power over me again. Never again let anyone make me feel worthless. Because despite every shitty thing that’s happened in my life—being left on the steps of that church, getting passed from foster home to foster home, Penelope and her crew of mean girls making my life hell in high school, and the year I spent in the group home after the best foster parents I ever had kicked me out because nobody would believe that I didn’t start that fire—I am somebody. I am worthy. And one day, I will find my people.

I hasten my steps, eager to reach the library and its warmth. Solace has always greeted me when I opened a book. For a person who has spent their entire life alone, I relish the magic that can be found and the experiences I’ve had thanks to what’s written on those pages. Making a new friend. Traveling to faraway lands and being swept away by the kind of heroes and heroines who have made entire generations fall in love.

Perhaps today I can find the comfort in words that eludes me in life.

“Hey, girl. I didn’t think anyone would be in here today. That storm’s wild, huh?”

I rest my book on my lap and watch Cadence shrug off her coat and shake droplets of rain from her bangs.

“It is, yeah.”

“I had to get out of my room. My roomie’s boyfriend came over, and we were gonna chill and watch a movie, but then they started getting all hot and heavy, and I did not want to be there for that.” She giggles. “And then there was a ruckus in the common room because somebody’s earrings went missing, so I thought why not try the library. I really need to do some studying anyway. Drakos’s class is kicking my ass this year.”

The mention of his name is enough to have that swirling vortex of sadness, shame, and anger raging in my chest once more. A loud crack of thunder makes us both jump.

She shivers. “Wow. We might have to hole up in here all day.” She glances at the empty chair beside me. “You mind?”

“Not at all.”

“Great. I know libraries are supposed to be quiet and all, but I like having another person around. You know what I mean?”

Unexpected tears fill my eyes, and I blink to clear them.

She puts her cold hand on my arm and squeezes. “Hey, Ophelia.”

She remembers my name!

“Is something wrong?”

I swat away the tear running down my cheek. “I’m just being stupid.”

“No way. I know I don’t know you that well, but I know you aren’t stupid.” She leans forward and waits for me to meet her gaze, and when I do, she offers a gentle smile. “Now, in my experience, there’s very little that a good chat and a pack of Tate’s chocolate chip cookies won’t fix.” She reaches into her backpack and pulls out the familiar green bag before tearing it open. “What do you think?”

I blink at her when she opens the smaller packet inside and holds it out to me. “Take four. One is never enough.”

I take two. “These are my favorite,” I murmur. “Thank you.”

“Mine too.” She bites into one and hums with satisfaction. After she’s done savoring her first bite, she licks the crumbs from her lips and eyes me with concern. “So, tell me what has you in here all alone on a Saturday afternoon.”

I shrug. The last people I opened up to turned out to be heartless douchebags with the emotional intelligence of dung beetles, so I’m not exactly eager to repeat that experience.

She arches an eyebrow. “A guy, right?”

“Yeah.” More like three.

“Ugh!” She takes another bite of her cookie. “They’re such jerks.” Crumbs fly out of her mouth, and we both bust out laughing.

“They sure are,” I say, once I’ve caught my breath.

“I’m swearing off boys this semester. My grades weren’t great last year, so I promised my parents I’d study more.” She holds up her history book and pulls a face.

Cadence ends up getting zero studying done over the next few hours, but she does make me laugh with stories of all the disastrous dates she had last year. And for a few short but wonderful hours, I almost forget about the three vampires who broke my heart.

“Hey, we’re having a party at my house tonight. You want to come?” Cadence asks as we step out of the library. Thankfully, there’s a break in the clouds and the rain has stopped.

“Thanks, but I’m gonna grab some dinner and head back to my dorm. I’m not really a party kind of person.”

She rolls her eyes. “Me neither, but I have to go to some events for the society and all that.”

“You’re in a society?” I have no idea why that surprises me so much.

“Yeah. Silver Vale.” She flashes me a grin. “It’s cool, but sometimes I prefer doing my own thing, you know?”

I walk beside her toward Dionysus Commons. “Why did you join a society? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Not at all. It’s a family tradition. Generations of my family have attended Montridge, and they all joined Silver Vale.”

I recall Malachi telling me Silver Vale was a witch society. If generations of Cadence’s family were members, does that mean she’s a witch too?

“You should come check us out. We don’t make pledges go through the stupid hazing some of the other societies do. You either fit or you don’t.”

I frown. “That seems a little elitist.”

She shakes her head and laughs. “I get that, but it’s not. Some people are right for it, and some aren’t. It’s nothing to do with popularity or grades or who dated the hottest guy in high school. It’s purely based on”—she chews on her lip and looks at me as though she’s wondering how to finish the sentence—“ability.”

“I don’t have any special abilities,” I tell her.

We reach the Commons and come to a stop. She places a hand on my arm and offers me a smile that makes her hazel eyes twinkle. “You’ll never know unless you give us a try, Ophelia.”

I open my mouth to tell her she’s mistaken, but we’re interrupted by a guy running toward us and almost knocking Cadence over. “Jake!” she admonishes him.

“Sorry, C,” he replies with a sheepish grin. “But have you heard what happened?”

She rolls her eyes. “This is my friend Ophelia, by the way. Neanderthal.”

Her friend? Did she actually just call me her friend? A surge of happiness warms the cavernous black hole around my heart.

Jake gives me a quick once-over. “Hey, Ophelia.” I squint back at him as the sun peeks from behind the clouds, glaring directly in my face.

“There was a crash down by the river Thursday night.” He huddles closer to both of us and drops his voice, making me feel for the first time in my life that I belong in a secret conversation. “Two cars were involved, both of them burned-out wrecks. Five students were killed.”

My stomach drops through my knees, and I force my mouth to remain closed. This isn’t the kind of gossip I hoped for.

“Oh my word,” Cadence says. “Who?”

“Madison Cummings from our history class. Some new girl, Penny whatsherface and her boyfriend.” He snaps his fingers. “The football player. Aiden? Hayden?”

Cadence shakes her head. “I don’t know them.”

Her admission floods me with relief. She isn’t Penelope’s friend. And more importantly, maybe she won’t hate me if she ever finds out I had anything to do with their deaths.

“Well, they were in one car, but the other one had two new pledges from Onyx Society.”

I swallow. That means Madison’s boyfriend and the guy I didn’t recognize were vampire pledges.

Cadence’s eyes widen. “Oh, interesting.”

If Cadence is a witch, she must know about vampires. I want to ask her, but I wouldn’t dare. Especially not with Jake here. “And th-they all died in the car accident?” My words stick in my throat as I recall the bloody mess of bodies left behind in that parking lot.

Jake nods. “That’s the official report. From the horse’s mouth.”

“Jake’s dad is the chief of police,” Cadence explains.

My stomach churns. The chief of police. I’m going to jail. My arrest, trial, and ensuing life sentence flash by in a montage of horrible images. It doesn’t matter that I didn’t kill those people, just like it didn’t matter that I didn’t burn down my high school. I was there. Axl, Xavier, or Malachi can’t be trusted to tell the truth about my part. And it’s not like I can tell anyone that vampires were responsible.

“You sure you don’t want to come to this party tonight?” Cadence asks me, and I force the blur of images that could be my potential future from my mind.

“It’s gonna be a rager.” Jake pumps his fist in the air.

Cadence swats his chest. “You’re such a caveman.”

He blows her a kiss, and she makes a retching sound like she’s disgusted by him, even though it’s clear she’s not.

I force a smile. “Thank you for the invite, really, but I’m gonna pass.”

“Then you should definitely stop by next week some time. Just ask for me, and I’ll show you around.” She takes me by surprise when she pulls me in for a hug, and I awkwardly return it before Jake is pulling her away, demanding she help him get a keg. He says a quick goodbye to me, and I watch the two of them head off in the direction of the Silver Vale house.

There’s still a smile on my face, but that bone-crushing sorrow is already snaking its way back into me, filling me up from my toes until it reaches the top of my head. Droplets of water splash on my face, and I tilt my head back to see dark clouds rolling overhead once more. At least the weather matches my mood.