...Slaughtering...
The four of you squeezed through the crowd to watch the main unit of the Scout Regiment coming back.
"That's right, Commander Erwin! Did you give those ugly bastards a thrashing?!" yelled one of the civilians.
You watched Erwin, mounted on his broad white horse, riding through the streets of Trost like a man on a mission. You thought to yourself: That's how a real Scout looks like coming back from battle. And I'm going to look just like him.
"Look! It's Captain Levi! They say he's like an entire brigade unto himself!"
A thin, probably short man looked like he'd rather be anywhere else. At least he didn't look depressed like the Scouts you've seen before. None of the Scouts of the main unit looked anything short of honorable. It made you even more excited to join them.
"Feel how excited everybody is? It's like the crowd just has a different energy now," said Eren.
"Well, we are going on five years without an incident," spoke up Hanna from behind you. "Seems like a good omen."
"And you should check out all the cannon upgrades. The sight alone ought to be enough to scare them off," said her boyfriend Franz.
She smiled. "Isn't that the truth?"
Eren scoffed. "You can't seriously believe that, you stupid lovebirds!"
Hanna gasped and a rosy blush dusted her cheeks. "E-Eren? You think we're a couple?"
"You're getting ahead of yourself, Eren!" Franz pointed his finger back and forth between you and Eren. "You two are the stupid lovebirds!"
"What?!" you and Eren shouted at the same time.
Hanna blinked, looking confused. "Didn't you guys kiss or something at dinner a couple weeks ago?"
You sent a quick glare to Mikasa who just innocently smiled at you. "She made that shit up. All lies, you hear me? That never happened."
"Yeah, Mikasa was just being..." Eren eyed her, "weird."
"Hey, would you look at this?" A blond, older Garrison who looked somewhat familiar came over.
"Mr. Hannes!" called out Eren.
You froze. Oh...him.
"Word on the street says you guys graduated yesterday. Either you've all grown up or they've lowered their standards."
Eren laughed. "You're really one to talk. Do the Corps of Engineers let their new chief drink by himself or with him?"
"Watch it." When his eyes moved along to you, there was an instant spark of recognition. "Hey, aren't you the girl that killed half the animals in Shiganshina?"
You let out an awkward laugh. "Well it certainly doesn't matter anymore, does it? They're all dead now." He didn't look too impressed. "But, uh, thanks for covering for me back then, I guess."
Whenever you got caught, which was never by yourself but by other children snitching on you, he'd step up and deal with the other Garrison to let you off the hook. Time and time again. Thanks to him, you never went to prison. Not that you could as a child anyway, but maybe they would've made an exception if they took a closer look at your criminal history.
"No problem. Y/n, was it? That orphanage was probably messed up to begin with. I'm glad you made something of yourself, though." Then he turned back to the others, falling more solemn. "This might be out of the blue, but I want you to know your mom's death still haunts me. I haven't forgiven myself, and I won't."
"Neither have I, but it wasn't your fault," said Eren. "We couldn't have known what was coming. But that won't happen again because now we know what we're dealing with. Right, guys?"
"Right," you agreed, resting an elbow on his shoulder. "We didn't make it to the top ten all for nothing. Believe us, Hannes, we're going to make the people in the walls prouder than their own children can."
He smiled. "Alright then."
. * . *
Later, some of you were assigned up to the walls to stuff in the cannons. You were helping out Connie with the same one.
"So the Scouts?" he asked.
"Yeah," you said. "The MP?"
"No."
"What?"
"The Scouts."
"What?!" shouted Eren who was stuffing another cannon. "The hell you mean you're joining the Scouts? What happened to the MP? That was your whole thing!"
"Hey, a guy can change his mind, okay?" Connie continued helping out and muttered just for you to hear, "Always eavesdropping on us."
You sighed. He will always weasel himself into other people's situations anyway.
"I think your speech yesterday fired him up," said Mina.
"Hey! I was talking to Y/n first, not any of you! And his little tantrum had nothing to do with it."
"Don't be shy, you're not the only one affected by his words." Thomas came over, looking a little shy himself.
You narrowed your eyes. "Weren't you the one who started the whole thing talking about how humans couldn't defeat the titans?" He averted his eyes and scratched his neck.
"Hey guys? Can I tell you a secret?" Sasha asked, coming over. She opened her jacket and revealed a tube of meat. "Because I accidentally helped myself to the Officer's Pantry." Everyone else gasped as if it was such a scandal. "I'm willing to share if you don't tell," she said, practically drooling down her chin.
"No, Sasha, put it back!"
"Come on! Just think about it this way: sooner or later, we'll take back all the livestock we have lost!"
"Damn right, Sasha. Save me a slice, please," you said. And even though at first the rest of them were nervous, they copied you anyway so now all you'll get is a thinner slice than you probably could've gotten. Which made you a tiny bit bitter.
Lightning flashed before your eyes. Then there was meat. A lot of it---but really it was flesh. And steam. And a pair of big eyes that stared down at you. No one was talking anymore. "Am I dreaming or-"
"The Colossal Titan!!!"
A massive puff of steam released and blew you all off the wall. You shot the wires of your ODM Gear into the wall just in time and balanced yourself. Sparing a quick glance and seeing everyone else alright, you sprinted up the walls. Eren's footsteps were right behind you.
"He took out the cannons and the gates!" he yelled out to you. "He has intelligence!"
You wanted to laugh. Titans have brains? You shot your wires to its head. Then let's cut it open and see it! You flipped upside down in the air and in one swift motion you dragged a long stab of your blades into its flesh from its forehead all the way down to the top of its nape, making it howl in pain.
But you heard Eren swinging in so you moved out of the way to let him take the kill. Just as he raised his blades into the positionâthe titan released another wave of steam. And in the next second, it was gone.
"Eren! Y/n! Where'd he go?! Did you guys take him out?!" yelled Thomas.
"He disappeared!" You ran back up the wall. I should've kicked Eren out of the way and taken it out myself.
"Exactly like five years ago!" Eren made it back up right after you. "Y/n, I'm sorry for wasting that chance-"
"There you go againâapologizing and blaming yourself for shit you have no control of. It pisses me off! You want to make it up to me? Then be ready when the titans start pouring in!" And then you took a step back and schooled your expression back to normal. Damn, I actually sound so serious right now.
"Look alive!" One of the Elite of the Garrison arrived. You all saluted."Operation Colossal Titan Response is in effect. I expect you all to take part! Report to HQ! If you got any details, we will need it!"
"Yes sir!" All of you shouted.
"And which one of you is L/n?" You raised your hand. "L/n, follow me! You are assigned to the reargard on special orders!"
Your eyebrows jumped up. "What? But-"
"Y/n, go! They need you!" Eren told you. "You just said it yourself, we all need to be ready when they come again!"
You stared into his eyes, angry and passionate. As always. "Fine! But you better all stay the hell alive or I'll kill you myself!"
Even the Elite Garrison looked confused by your contradicting words but still led you down the walls. The bell in the tower rang like sirens and the civilians flooded the streets. You landed in the front of HQ, where a stern-looking man had a hand raised for you to see.
"Cadet L/n, is it? I'm Team Leader Ian Dietrich. You're assigned to my team."
"Uh, happy to be here, sir."
"We're just waiting on the other Cadet. There she is."
Mikasa came down the steps, walking faster when she spotted you.
"Cadet Ackerman and Cadet L/n, I don't give two shits if you are still cadets or not. As of now, your mission is to protect the civilians of Trost and aid them their way into Wall Rose! And of course, slaughter all titans you may come across!"
You both saluted. "Yes sir!"
He beckoned you both to follow him over to the rest of the team.
"Have you seen Armin?" You asked.
"Yeah. He was a bit shaken up, but he's fine now. He and Eren are on the same team at the vanguard."
"At least they have each other."
"The two of us too."
You smiled a little. "When this is all over, Sasha's going to treat us to some meat she stole. It's at the top of the wall"
"If it's even there anymore."
"Come on, be a little more optimistic."
"A little hard now, isn't it?"
The rearguard team left at the same time in different directions.
You spotted a titan, ugly and stout, and dove straight for it. Two swings of your blades and it fell to the ground. Your first kill. Some other titans caught sight of you and came your way. With laser-like focus, you slaughtered five in a row like a lightning bolt. Not breaking a single sweat.
Made you wonder how people even managed to die by them.
Six kills already. You twirled your blades with your wrists, feeling a little full of yourself. Let's get it to ten.
Another abnormal was running around in the direction of the gates into Wall Rose. On the way there, you slaughtered another three, bringing your count to nine. Just as you got ready to raise it up to ten, someone else swung in and beat you to it.
You landed on a nearby roof as Mikasa finished the job. You watched as she taught that fat merchant a lesson long deserved and cleared the way for all the civilians to escape through. She joined you on the roof shortly after.
"Aren't you a little thief? That was supposed to be my kill," you told her, but unable to suppress your smile.
"Cry about it."
Ian landed as well and you both saluted. "Good work, Ackerman and L/n. I'm impressed."
"Piece of cake, sir," you said.
"I did what I could here, but thank you," said Mikasa, playing humble. "I need to be more careful in the future. My blades were dulled. I'll do better next time."
He looked taken aback. "What on earth did the two of you have lived through to be so nonchalant about all of this?"
"Well, we're both from Shiganshina," you said. "So."
"I'm sorry, that must've been offensive for me to bring the memories up. Keep up the good work. And stay alive." He jumped off and swung away. You and Mikasa left right after.
When rain started pouring, the bell rang, and the gates closed. All civilians were evacuated. Only the steaming, decomposing corpses of the titans remained.
"That's it, we're done. Now scale the wall," said Dietrich.
"Y/n and I should help the vanguard withdraw, sir."
You glanced at her. "We should?" She left without another word so you followed after her, with Ian yelling at you guys to come back.
"Do you want to find Eren and Armin or not?" she asked as you two were in the air.
"Yes, but they're going to be fine."
"How would you know that?"
"Because they're Eren and Armin!"
"You can't just rely on that reason alone!"
"I can and I will!" You sped off before you could hear her say anything else. You found it ridiculous how you were the only one who believed in your friends. But if she really wanted to see them that bad, then sticking along wouldn't hurt.
Mikasa still stuck behind but neither of you said anything, only slaughtering all the titans in your paths and occasionally lending each other a hand if needed. That brought your kill count up to seventeen.
As you two neared the area where the vanguard were, you spotted a familiar face. "Hey, Annie!"
She turned over her shoulder. "Y/n?"
You landed on the roof. "Good to see you alive, let's catch up later, but have you seen Armin and Eren's squad anywhere?" Mikasa landed right next to you.
"Not sure. I've only seen some squads who made it back."
"But we found Armin. He's over there." Reiner pointed to the corner.
As your eyes settled on him, you recognized that look instantly. Defeat. Because it was just so ugly. It took away everything beautiful about the person the moment it made itself even the slightest visible.
You both rushed to him. "Are you okay? You're not hurt, are you?" asked Mikasa.
"And where'd the stubborn dumbass go?" You glanced around.
Then Armin looked up. Those eyes. Filled with dread. If he wasn't your best friend, then you would've wanted to rip them out of their sockets. Why is he looking at us like that? Then tears started pouring down his cheeks. "They'reâthey were the cadets of Squad 34. Thomas Wagner. Nack Tierce. Milieus Zeremski. Mina Carolina. Andâand Eren Jaeger! They upheld their duties and died valiantly in battle!"
Everyone was listening but no one said a thing. Not even Mikasa. You were staring at her, seeing the light leave her eyes. As if she were dead herself.
"I'm so sorry," he choked out. "It should've been me that died, not him. I couldn't do a damn thing! I'm worthless."
You kneeled down in front of him and put a hand to the side of his head, as if caressing a child. He looked up at you. "Did you bump your head, Armin?"
"What?"
"Eren's not dead. He just hasn't come back yet."
"Y/nâI saw it with my own eyes! He was eaten right in front of me-"
"Armin, did you sleep well last night? I wouldn't blame you if you didn't. The celebration was really loud, after all. You should get some rest when you can, alright?" You patted him on the head and stood up. "So no one's seen Eren yet? Okay, I'll go find him myself."
Someone put a hand on your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks. "Y/n, I know you're grieving and in denial, but-"
"Jean, please take your hand off me," you told him without sparing him a look. "Or I'll cut it off myself." He cursed under his breath and retracted his hand. "Thank you." You came over to Mikasa. "I'm going to go find Eren now. You want to come with?" She didn't say anything, didn't look at you. "Okay, I'll see you later then." You hopped off the roof and swung away.
As you searched for him, you brought your count up to nineteen in the meantime. It's alright, you told yourself. Trost is a big town. It wasn't though, and you knew that factually. But logic wasn't very attractive right now.
ODM Gear could be heard around you which meant either your friends decided to search for him with you or they've all finished resting up and were getting back into action.
You caught a glimpse of something red falling to the ground. You didn't hesitate at all to redirect your course and speed straight to it. Swinging over the roof, you saw Mikasa on the ground, alive but still as stone. Don't tell me she's giving up already. You swung down as an abnormal neared.
As you wrapped your arms around her, sweeping her away, something loomed over. The two of you rolled across the concrete onto the side of the alley. And that thingâthat titanâthat had crossed from above you punched the abnormal to the ground. Then it stomped on it. Kicked it. And kept doing so until the abnormal was a bloody mess from its stomach. It reminded you of the bloody stomach of that dead squirrel you killed years ago.
Mikasa's breath hitched. "Is that titan... killing another titan?"
"Should we clap for it?" you asked.
Then suddenly, Armin came out of nowhere and swept her away. "Y/n! Grab on!" Connie extended his arm and you grabbed his hand. All four of you landed back on the roof. At this point, you've been on top of more houses than inside them.
"You guys alright?" he asked. "We have to get out of here! Shit! Two fifteen-meter titans!"
"No, that one's different." Mikasa pointed to the one that had just practically saved you two.
"Yeah, have you ever seen a titan as ripped as that one?"
"Y/n! Not the time!"
"Just look at it! It's more shredded than any guy I've ever seen!"
The shredded titan howled and charged at the other one. Within seconds, the other was on the ground, head clean. And the shredded one stomped and stomped until it was dead.
"It just finished it off! It knew the weak spot was its nape!" exclaimed Armin.
"Alright, let's stop fangirling over a goddamn titan and split up," said Connie. "Last thing we need is him coming our way!"
"But he has no reaction to us! Any other titan would've killed us already!"
"Forget it, just label it as another abnormal! Let's just get out of here."
"My tanks are empty," said Mikasa.
You bent over on one knee. "Here, I'll carry you on my back."
"I'm not getting on your back."
"No need, Y/n." Armin pulled out his own tanks. "Mikasa, I'll give mine to you. It'll be a complete waste if I keep them. But-"
"Armin, no one's talking to you! Keep your stupid gas to yourself!" you yelled. "Come on, Mikasa, you're pretty light! We'll be fine! Imagine a cadet with four arms and four blades! That's going to be us!"
"I am not getting on your back!"
"Fine! Then Mikasa, take my tanks. And I'll get on your back, Y/n," said Armin.
You kneeled back down. "Hell yeah! Get out your blades and hop on!"
After he switched tanks with Mikasa, he wrapped his arms around your neck and you all took off. He couldn't pull out his blades or else he'd fall off, so you'll have to postpone the dream of being a titan fighter with four arms and four blades.
"I think I have a plan!" yelled Armin right by your ear. "We should use that special titan to our advantage! Make him fight for us!"
"What?! That's insane!" shouted Connie.
"No it's not!" you yelled back at him. "Come on, Armin, talk!"
His plan was to lure that titan to HQ, where all the other titans were climbing and infesting. Simple plan. Risky, but could work. So you all swung all around it, catching its attention, and led it in the way of HQ. As soon as it reached there, it threw a punch at another titan trying to climb into the building. You all went inside through the hole. Jean was right there to greet you all without saying a word.
Connie firmly patted Armin's back. "Okay, you fucking genius! That actually worked! Check it out, Jean! We found an abnormal titan that has beef with its own kind! That big, beautiful son of a bitch is our ticket out of here!"
"Connie, are you insane?! A titan's not going to help us!"
"It is helping us," said Mikasa. One word from her and his mouth is shut closed. "Look at it. It's not going for any of us."
"Alright, let's talk inside," said Armin. "Meanwhile, we can devise a plan to get rid of the ones threatening to come in."
"You guys head on in," you said, which immediately turned their heads. "I'm going out."
"Y/n, you can't!"
"I'm not going to be stuck in there, breathing in the stuffy air! That's boring! I'm going to make sure no more titans out there come over here!"
"Y/n, you're not seriously still trying to search for Eren, are you?" asked Jean. "Face it, he's gone! You're going to get yourself killed out there-"
"I've slain more titans than any of you have! I'm going to be fine. And so is he!"
"Y/n-"
You swung outside, not wanting to hear anymore of this bullshit, and continued your search. He was aliveâyou could feel it. And you were going to prove every single one of them wrong. Even Mikasa.
Traveling across Trost, you slayed all titans that blocked your way. The count was now twenty-one. When your fumes were getting lower and lower, you came across a girl on the floor. A corpse. Her legs bitten off, but her gear untouched. You switched out her tanks with yours. You didn't mourn for herâyou didn't even know her. Then you left.
At this point, your mind was threatening to set itself on fire. Your heart was pounding uncontrollably, and this uncomfortable feeling started boiling in your stomach, as if you had left something important somewhere you forgot. Where is he? Because he sure wasn't deadâyou would know if he was. I would know.
You turned over your shoulder to see three abnormals chasing after you. You twirled your blades with your wrists and charged back the way you came. The first two were killed with ease. The moment the second fell, you were met with a huge palm. And you were flying straight at it. But it was knocked into the building before it could touch you by that titan with the insane muscles. You swung yourself atop a roof, pressing a hand to your chest to try and calm your heartbeats.
But the titan seemed to be wearing itself out after all this fighting as well. Its moves were getting more sluggish, and more titans were taking advantage of it. At the end, it was armless, but it fought like a soldier. It howled its last roar before it fell to the ground.
Goddamn it, I wanted to show Eren that cool titan.
Before you turned your back to it, its nape released a puff of steam. A figure popped out. You sped down there without hesitation. Because you would recognize that silhouette anywhere, anytime, out of anyone.
You caught Eren just as he fell forward, your arm around his back and your other hand pressing his head to your shoulder. He was warm, which meant he was alive. I knew it! I fucking told them all!
Mikasa landed and she fell to her knees. She held up her hands. "Is heâcan I-"
"Yeah." You handed him over to her arms and she weeped for the brother she thought she almost lost.
Then you realized something wet trickling down your own cheeks. Oh, fuck. You turned your face away, quickly trying to wipe your tears away as the others arrived. This is so embarrassing. You couldn't even remember the last time you've properly cried.
Did I actually think he died or something? But that was no matter. Because he was alive and breathing, right in front of you.