Sophia paces back and forth watching the door anxiously. Her hands trembling, stomach tight with nervousness. Her sister's memory pushed aside by other thoughts. How will he take the news? Will he be happy for her, happy for the both of them? She turns to the mirror hanging from the wall and smiles. This is what she needed. This. The promise of new life after a tragic death. She runs her hand down her stomach, knowing it's too soon to tell, she rubs it anyway. She wonders how it will feel once it starts to show.
The door knob turns slowly making her turn abruptly. She takes a deep breath.
Adam walks inside, eyes looking down on the floor, the suit in which he usually looks so handsome, is disheveled.
"Adam?" Sophia walks towards him deeply concerned by her husband's sad demeanor. She places a gentle hand on the side of his cheek and lifts his face slowly meeting his eyes. "What's the matter?"
He gazes at her but doesn't say a word. Instead, he takes her hand and guides her to the drawing room. Sophia starts to imagine the worse.
As they settle on the sofa, he starts speaking lowly. "It's nothing too bad. We were invited to the Mayor's house for a luncheon."
"How did it go?" she asks desperately.
"My father and the mayor came to an agreement."
"What kind of agreement?"
He rubs his head roughly as he replies, "My father sold him the shop."
Sophia gasps puzzled. The carpentry, the only one in Lakewood, the one that Adam's own grandfather built from scratch and passed it down to his son and it was supposed to be passed down to Adam in the future. It's the Lancaster's pride, all their work and determination packed in that one place.
Catching her breath she asks in disbelief, "He sold the shop to Mayor Smith?"
"Yes, to the Mayor of Lakewood," he says sarcastically. "As soon as he heard of our business in New York, he wanted the shop as his own. He offered my father a substantial amount of money and my father accepted it. There was a big celebration after the accord. He didn't even ask me." He says as an afterthought. "He didn't think of asking for my opinion."
"I'm sorry," she replies softly not able to find any suitable words. They sit side by side, Sophia runs her hand down his back encouragingly, wondering what she can do to make him feel better about all this.
"Oh God, I've been so selfish," Adam says hurriedly after a moment of silence. "I completely forgot about your appointment with Dr. Harris."
Sophia's cheeks turn red and she looks down shyly. Feeling her stomach in knots, she takes a deep breath
"So, are you better then?" he asks eagerly.
"No, not better."
His eyes betray him, he looks distressed by her health and it makes her smile. "Is it serious?"
She nods. "Very." He's about to embrace her with great sadness but she stops him with a hand on his chest. "I'm pregnant."
He's eyes widen is great shock. "You're...?"
She smiles all her worries melting away, and by the look on his face his worries did so as well.
"My darling Sophia! You make me the happiest man alive!" he stands up in excitement and pulls her in, embracing her strongly, he showers her face with kisses, Sophia laughs as his kisses tickle her skin.
They embrace in the candle light as the sun starts setting. The lack of a fire at the fireplace makes the cold air unbearable, but they don't feel a thing, they're sharing the warmth, the warmth that Adam always seems to have.
"Are you hungry?" she asks looking up at her husband. Lily and I made supper but I'm afraid it's gotten cold." Adam shakes his head. "Neither am I. I suppose we could save it for tomorrow, if you don't mind."
"I don't mind at all," he replies.
"We shall go to bed then?" She pulls away and starts towards their bedroom but Adam holds on to her hand.
"No Mrs. Lancaster. You are now a mother, or soon to be and I will not have you making any efforts whatsoever." He lifts her in his arms smoothly, Sophia giggles in delight. "It's my duty as a husband to ensure both of your safety."
"Adam, you're mad," she laughs.
"I am mad. And you're the one to blame."
Ò Ò Ò
"Truth is, it is not all balls and entertainment." Valerie sits beside Sophia early in the morning at the Smith's garden enjoying a luncheon. A few servants stand by awaiting any order or whim the Mayor's daughter in law may have. Sophia sits uncomfortably wondering why Valerie invited her to a luncheon in the first place. Valerie was a pleasant person but she prefers to keep her distance from her for obvious reasons, but an invitation from the Smith family can't be rebuffed.
"I hardly see my husband throughout the day, with luck we acknowledge each other at night before we go to bed."
Sophia nods and looks down at her shoes wishing she could be somewhere else.
"May I tell you something in confidence?" Valerie says as she holds Sophia's hand for support.
"Umm yes," she replies looking around her watching the three maids standing by the table.
"Daniel believes that little Daniel isn't his son."
Sophia's eyes widen in disbelief. "But the boy looks so much like him."
"Yes, because he is his." Valerie sighs as she struggles to come up with an explanation. "Let me explain. My family owns a vineyard and for Mayor Smith and my father to become associates they agreed that Daniel and I would be married once we became of age. We only met once when we were fifteen. He was so sweet that I completely fell head over heels for him. The second time we saw each other was weeks before our wedding, and well," she pauses and raises her eyebrows. Sophia watches her confused but as Valerie sips on her tea, cheeks red and hands holding on to the mug for dear life, it dawns on her.
"I got pregnant," she says confirming Sophia's thoughts. "I tried concealing at first but I felt so much shame, I had to tell my father. Who told Daniel's father. Who decided to pull the wedding forward. Instead of the vast wedding our families were planning, we were married at my house with only the priest and our fathers."
He takes a deep breath and lets out a laugh. "I've never told anyone this and I have to admit I feel better."
Sophia fakes a smile, she really wishes she hadn't told her at all.
"After our wedding, we decided to stay with my father until I gave birth. But Daniel had to leave because his father wanted him back, so he left me for three months." Her eyes start watering and her voice starts breaking as she continues. "Daniel was born prematurely and I honestly thought I was going to lose him." A few tears escaped her eyes and she wipes them rapidly with the back of her hand. "But he recovered so fast. By the time that I arrived with the baby, Daniel was convinced that he wasn't his. He claims that I saw someone else and that . . . he's a healthy baby, he just seems like he was born like any other baby, I just. . ." she pauses and takes deep breaths trying to calm herself down. "Forgive me, I just don't know what to do."
Sophia looks out to the distance, the forest seems so welcoming, she is tempted to get up on her feet, walk straight to the green trees and not look back.
"Forgive me, I shouldn't have burdened you with my tale of woe, I'm sure you have more important things to think about."
Sophia turns her attention back to Valerie wiping her face with a handkerchief, she exhales with a smile on her face, though the smile seems out of place, but she has no other thoughts but of the baby growing inside her. "Valerie..." she tries to say something encouraging, something to let her know that everything will get better. Truth is, Sophia could've been in a similar situation months ago. Her smile fades, her breathing quickens, all those feelings of shame, and guilt, of feeling dirty come rushing back. She's back on the floor in her room, the engagement party downstairs, Adam waiting for her at the other end.
She needs to leave now.
"That's enough about me," she hears Valerie say. "How are you? How's Adam?"
Sophia blinks at how she referred to her husband. "He's doing well."
"I understand he wasn't very happy with the accord concerning the carpentry business."
"He was... taken off guard. He wasn't expecting it, I mean, it's his family business, their legacy."
Valerie nods and gives her a supporting smile, "Mr. Smith was convinced that it was the best for both of our families..." she stops short, seeing Sophia's uneasiness makes her believe that Adam leaves her out of the Lancaster business, like husbands usually do. "Well, we shouldn't be talking about such a delicate matter, it's not our place."
Sophia looks up at Valerie, she watches her bright blue eyes, her flowing long black hair, her expensive dress, and the manner she addresses the servants, she's polite, even nice but there's something in the way she speaks, something that makes her uncomfortable. She gets up on her feet hurriedly. "Well, this has been a lovely evening, but my husband will be home for his lunch hour and I should be there to greet him."
Valerie smiles and stands. "Of course, you must, let me call the coachman," she snaps her fingers at one of her maids.
"No, no, that won't be necessary, I'll walk."
"Are you sure? You live so far away," Valerie insists.
"That's not a problem, I enjoy walking," she says rapidly.
"At least let me walk you."
"No, you finish your wine, I'll show myself out," Sophia replies trying to escape the Smith house as soon as possible.
"Alright," Valerie says pulling her in her arms giving her a strong hug that left her out of breath. "Thank you so much for listening, you are a great friend."
Sophia doesn't reply, she wouldn't go as far as to call her a friend. As much as she enjoyed Valerie's company, she honestly doesn't need friends, she had her husband, and that was enough.
Valerie let's go of her after what seemed ten minutes, and with a polite good bye, Sophia makes her way inside the grand Smith house, her mind so engaged in the early conversation with Valerie, she doesn't notice Daniel walking down the stairs.
"Hello."
Sophia recognizes that voice immediately, she freezes in place and doesn't want to look back.
"I wasn't aware you were here," he says quietly.
She turns slowly holding her breath. Daniel stands behind her looking as handsome as always. "Your wife invited me to a luncheon."
"I see, I hope it was pleasant."
"Yes, very."
"I was just going to go to the drawing room for some tea, would you like to join me?" he asks politely.
Sophia doesn't think twice, she replies, "I can't, it's getting late I better get home."
Daniel takes a few steps forward carefully, keeping his eyes on the footman standing by the door. "Sophia, please it will only take a few minutes," he whispers.
Sophia's perplexed. What can he tell her that he hasn't told her since her engagement with Adam? She doesn't trust him, she doesn't trust herself with him. But his eyes tell her he has something in his mind, and she can't refuse him. She nods faintly and Daniel smiles.
"Please," he says allowing her to precede him.
They enter the drawing room and he closes the door gently, but he doesn't turn, as if figuring out his next words. Sophia shifts in place not knowing if or how to start.
"I want to apologize," he says at last. Sophia blinks in confusion. He turns slowly, his face holding so much pain, her eyes start to water. "I've fallen to a place I've never wanted to be in. To a place of lies, selfishness and arrogance. I want to be the same man that first sat eyes on a young beautiful girl one Christmas party, but I fear he's lost forever." He sighs deeply before continuing. "All I want is for you to be happy, and now I see that you are. Will you ever forgive me?"
Sophia's bewildered. She has never seen Daniel so vulnerable, her heart slows down at the realization that this will end as it should have ended months ago. "I already forgave you." He looks up at her surprised. "Because of you, I learned how it felt to be loved. I will never forget that."
He shrugs sadly. "Maybe in another life?"
She smiles. "Maybe." As a farewell, she leans forwards and standing on her toes, she pecks him on the cheek. "Thank you for giving me such wonderful memories," are the last words she tells him before exiting the Smith house.
Ò Ò Ò
Just as she exits the Smith's property, the cool air feels fresh and welcoming. She takes a deep breath feeling free and renewed. From far down the street, she hears the clacking of a horse loud and fast. As she sees the familiar face, a smile escapes her lips.
"Hello there milady," Adam says as he comes to a halt.
Sophia reaches her hand out to Jesse, the friendliest horse they own, and caresses his sweet face. "What are you doing here?"
Adam comes down and pats Jesse on the side. "You weren't home and Lily told me where you were, I was going to surprise you."
"It's a nice surprise," she replies.
Adam smiles and holds out his hand. "Your horse awaits."
Sophia laughs as she accepts it and takes his hand. He kisses it gently. He helps her up on the horse and Adam pushes himself up confidently behind Sophia, wrapping his arms around her, he takes hold of the reins, she leans back comfortably.
"Alright Jesse, we are going to take it slow this time, we don't want our mother to be to go through any strains," she hears him say.
"I'm expecting, not ill," she retorts playfully.
"I heard," he starts as the horse walks calmly on the outskirts of Lakewood, their usual route. "That the less harsh movements, the better for the infant, and I am going to do whatever it takes to make this little man as secure as possible." He rubs his hands on her belly and she giggles. "How was the luncheon?"
"It was good," she replies.
"Really? Did Mrs. Smith boast about her piano skills again?"
Sophia laughs. "She did play one song."
"Typical. If only she knew you are so much more talented than she is."
"I haven't played the piano since our families met," Sophia replies incredulously.
"And it was the best music I have ever heard."
Sophia smiles. "I spoke to Daniel," she admits.
"Oh?"
"We talked it all out. We had closure and now we can just focus on what's important."
His hand covers her belly again. "I agree." As the house comes into view, Adam says excitedly. "I forgot to tell you. I hired someone new."
"You did?" she asks surprised. "A maid?"
"A maid, a nanny, a cook, whatever you need her for, she will be there."
"Why did you..."
"Because," he interrupts as if he already guessed what she was going to ask. "You will need help. You will no longer be able to do chores and Lily won't be able to do everything for herself."
They arrive to their home and Adam climbs down first, then he holds Sophia by her waist and helps her down. Sophia smiles in gratitude and he holds her hand as they enter the house.
"There she is!" exclaims a woman's voice.
Sophia's eyes widen in excitement. "Gilda? But how?"
Gilda hugs her as she explains, "Adam came by your father's house and asked me if I wanted to come work here. I had to say yes of course. He said that it was urgent, did something happened?" Gilda asks, her face gone serious.
"No, well..." Sophia looks at Adam and Adam nods. "We haven't made an announcement."
"Announcement for what?" Gilda asks eagerly.
"We're pregnant."
Gilda doesn't know how to react. She covers her face and whispers, "Oh my God." Then in a louder voice she says, "Congratulations!" she embraces Sophia again and then pulls Adam in as well. "Does that mean that I get to be the child's nanny?" she asks. Sophia smiles and nods. Gilda's eyes start tearing up. "It's been a long time since I last held a child. You were the last." She pulls away and in a more serious tone, she says, "This is what we needed. After..."
Sophia nods fighting back tears. "I know."
After a moment of silence, Gilda says, "So, where will I be staying?"
"Please, right this way Mrs. Gilda," replies Adam extending his arms pointing up the stairs.
As soon as Gilda walks ahead of them, Sophia takes a hold of Adam's hand and pulls him towards her. Adam turns confused, but before he can speak, she pulls him down by the collar of his jacket and kisses him on the lips. Adam smiles as she lets go, he holds on to her before she can pull away and steals another kiss. Sophia giggles as he makes a snarling sound and kisses her neck.
"Adam!" she squeals quietly.
"What a lovely house!" comes Gilda's voice from upstairs.
Adam pulls away rapidly, face red with excitement, "Thank you Mrs. Gilda," he replies as he takes Sophia's hand and start up the stairs. "Had it specially made for my lady."
Gilda laughs. "Isn't that sweet," she says as she turns to Sophia. Sophia simply smiles, she has a feeling that the rest of her life will be sweet.