;
bubbað¤:
i'm outside
:
ok, here i come
bubbað¤:
nah i'm comin to the door, i wanna speak to ya parents
i grabbed my tote and made my way downstairs anxiously. not only because i wanted to see her, but also because i was concerned. the sound of my footsteps grabbed the attention of my mom and dad, who were in the living room watching tv.
"aw you look cute, sam here?" my mom asked.
i nodded, "yeah, but she finna come in and speak, then we leavin'."
"ok, go open the door-" a knock from the front door stopped my dad mid-sentence.
knowing who is was, i hurriedly went to open it, and was met with sam.
"hey lani." she gave me a toothless grin and brought me into a tight hug, which i reciprocated immediately.
we pulled away and i looked at her hesitantly, wanting to ask about what happened earlier. but i guess sam could tell, because as soon as i opened my mouth she nodded.
"i know, i wanna talk about it in the car. lemme speak to ya parents first." she gave me a sincere look and i nodded understandingly.
sam gently moved me aside so she could step in, her hand around my waist; which i noticed was a habit of hers. i led her to the living room where my parents were and she greeted them and they made small conversation. i could tell my parents actually liked her, which was odd because they're never too fond of anyone.
after a few minutes they wrapped up and we eventually left, but not before i said goodbye to both of them. sam and i walked out to her car and she opened the door for me, per usual.
any other day i would've grabbed the aux but it didn't feel appropriate right now, the uneasy tension floating around. sam crunk up the car and let the radio play lowly, pulling out of the neighborhood. i took notice of her seatbelt not being on and tapped her shoulder. she responded with a hum, glancing over at me.
"put on your seatbelt." i said lowly, averting my gaze back out the window.
i wanted to talk to her about what happened earlier, or ask if she wanted to talk about it. but i didn't wanna initiate the conversation, afraid i would be overbearing.
so i continued staring out the window, attempting to get my mind off of it. which wasn't very hard because overthinking is a friend of mine.
"he's always acted like that." she spoke so lowly that i almost didn't hear her. i knew what she was referring to though, so i looked over and waited for a continuance.
"ever since i came out he's acted that way. he usually can keep his thoughts to himself, but not always. whenever i wear something 'too masculine' or do something too 'man-like' he kinda blows up like that.
"i know i shouldn't let it be normalized, but it's become something i don't mind anymore. he goes on his verbal rampages and i sit and listen, it's not like i can do much since i live under his roof..." sam didn't dare look at me the whole time she spoke, and i wondered if it was cause she was actually sad or if she was trying to pay attention. either way, i still listened to her thoroughly and concluded that it was the former.
i grabbed her hand, that rested on the console, and squeezed it gently.
"i'm sorry, if that means anything to you. i can't tell you i know how you're feeling cuz i don't, but i don't imagine it's the best. it can't be." i told her honestly.
"how did your parents react?"
"when i told them i liked girls?" she nodded.
"well my mom was supportive off rip, and i loved her for it cuz she made me feel comfortable with myself. my dad was still trying to grasp the concept and he got pretty distant, but he's doing a lot better. i think he was caught off guard..." i could see sam grin sadly somewhere in the midst and immediately felt bad.
"wait wait i'm sorry, not tryna rub it in or nothin." i looked down at my lap, slightly embarrassed.
"no, no you good... i just wonder what it would be like to have someone to support me like that. i mean, of course i know you support me but it's different."
i knew what she meant.
sam lived in her home with someone who didn't support who she was, and i know from experience that the environment you live in influences a lot of your attitude and mindset. with the way sam's dad acted, it couldn't be good for her or her mental.
"... thank you for telling me, you didn't have to." i said genuinely, because i meant it. she chose to tell me something rather personal about her life, and i appreciate her for trusting me enough to do so.
sam shook her head and i peeped the faint smile on her face, "no, thank you for listening."
i smiled back at her, which led us to burst into a fit of giggles. tension in the car finally disappearing and returning to the usual, comfortable aura. we settled down and rode the rest of the way in a comfortable silence.
i saw the ferris wheel in the distance and did a little dance in my seat. i hadn't been to a fair in forever, so i was excited as hell.
"you been to a fair before, right?" sam asked while pulling into the crowded parking lot. there weren't many available spaces but she managed to find one towards the middle.
"yeah i have, just not in a while." i replied.
sam hummed in understanding and pulled into the space carefully, making sure not to hit any other cars. she turned the car off and grabbed her few belongings that she needed/wanted to take with her. said girl diverted her gaze to me, pouting slightly with puppy eyes.
"can you put these in your bag, pretty please?"
i shook my head and chuckled, replying in a soft voice, "yeah bubba."
i took the few items from her and put them in my tote. then i pulled the mirror down to fix my hair and apply a little more lipgloss, afterwards i was ready to go. from my peripheral, i could see sam about to get out but i stopped her.
"no, this time i'm openin the door for you. stay put." i demanded playfully. sam arched her eyebrow in question but allowed me to do so, shrugging.
i got out of the car and walked over to her side, pulling the door open so she could step out fully. i went to close it behind her but she stopped me.
i felt the heat radiate from our bodies as she stepped closer to me, wrapping an arm around my waist. goosebumps formed on the back of my neck and i had to contain the nervousness i felt; especially when she began to lean in. i froze slightly in place, allowing my anxiety to consume me.
but then i felt soft lips peck my forehead.
i tried avoiding her gaze, but inevitably failed since we were so close to one another. our eyes met and i thanked god for my complexion, otherwise i would be red.
sam only smirked at me, grabbing my hand swiftly,
"come on, the lines gettin' long."
;
y'all, tomorrow is election dayð.
to all my minorities, lgbtq+ folx, poc, etc. please be safe. try to stay in the house if possible and if you're going out to vote, go straight home afterwards. i'm already knowin america gon' be in shambles tomorrow.
don't forget to vote and comment, i love y'all ð¤.