"You're not in any pain?" Fang asked after he got done giving me a better pat down than any TSA agent ever dreamed of. He was so thorough, I wouldn't need another breast exam for at least three years.
"Of course not," I snapped, smacking his hands away from my chest.
Standing up, I brushed off yet another layer of grime. Seriously, my poor clothes have been put through the wringer since I hooked up with fang-a-licous. I looked at my dilapidated turtleneck which wasn't much more than a rag at this point. What do these vamps think? Cotton grows on trees? Wait? Does it? Or does it grow on bushes? Anyway...it didn't matter. My shirt was ruined and my new jeans were going to need a power washer to get off the amount of crud embedded into the fabric.
"Then what was with all the twitching and jerking?"
"That wasn't twitching and jerking...you jerk! I was dancing."
"You call that dancing?" His brows shot up to the top of his forehead.
"Yes," I hissed, putting my hands on my hips. First he attacks my singing, which I cut him a little slack on. We can't all be Beyoncé, but I draw the line at rude comments on my dancing skills. I should have you know, I put the erk in twerk.
"That's not dancing," he rumbled, giving me one of those panty melting smiles.
For a moment, I had the urge to check to make sure mine where still on. After the bra incident, one couldn't be for certain he hadn't squirreled them away like David Copperfield and they were now gracing the Statue of Liberty or something.
Before I could pull out the waistband of my jeans to take a peek, he snatched me into his arms. One of this thick, muscular thighs shot between my legs and his hips slammed into mine as he pulled me tight against him.
"This is dancing," he murmured. Flashing his fangs in a Dentine smile, he whirled me around the cavern in moves that would have made Jonny Castle look like a failing monkey. This wasn't dancing...it wasn't even dirty dancing...this was sex shimmying. Or foreplay...I couldn't be sure.
With one last bump and grind, he dipped me low enough my hair swept the floor before bringing me slowly back up and straight to his lips. He growled as his mouth took possession of mine. His arms folding me close, then closer still until not even air could fit between the two of us. I have to give the guy kudos, his kissing skills were stellar and I could taste his triumph when my lips opened of their own accord. Drat! The little Benedict Arnolds.
Why was I always allowing him to kiss me, I wondered as my tongue tangoed with his. I swear, the man never asked, but simply swooped in anytime the urge took him. I should be mad about that. What was the matter with me? Why were my arms lifting up and running my hands through his luxurious hair? Why was I still kissing him when I knew full well I shouldn't? Oh...that was a new move. How does he get his tongue to swirl like that? And why was I wasting my time having an internal monologue with myself when I should be peeling off his pants?
What? Wait! No! No depantsing! Bad, bad Melanie. With herculean effort, I pulled my lips away from his and stepped back panting like I had just run a marathon. I was hotter than if I had been watching Magic Mike while reading Fifty Shades of Grey. He, on the other hand, looked completely composed and was grinning from ear to ear. Arrogant snot.
"Cut that out!" I huffed, trying to calm my hormones which were being riled into a frenzy by my inner slut who was waving around her pom-poms like an over-exuberant cheerleader. "Can you please do me a solid and at least ask before you wrap one of those lip locks on me?"
"No," he said casually. "I quite enjoy our little interludes."
Grinding my teeth, I shoved him to the side giving him a good glare as I went past. "If you are done trying to suck out my soul, I have a plan."
He narrowed his eyes at me. "What is your plan?"
Suspicion was dripping so much off his tongue, I wondered if he was still holding a grudge about the No Chance Bridge thing. I mean...seriously...it worked out even though he left finger imprints so deep in my dash I could probably extract DNA out of them.
"I spotted Gizmo parked right where we left him. I can jump up through the trap door and snag my car back. I'll drive back here and when the sun goes down...zippity-do-dah...we can make our getaway." I clapped my hands excitedly. It was a bloody brilliant plan if I do say so myself and it required no Forrest Gumping through the woods. When he didn't join in on my celebrations, I turned to look at him. "What's the matter?"
Fang was rubbing his forehead as if a zombie of a migraine had just started attacking his brain and was chewing on it. "Melanie, Melanie. You make me tired sometimes."
"Uh...thanks?"
"It wasn't a compliment."
"Somehow, it never is," I griped, crossing my arms over my chest. "What's wrong with my plan?"
"For one, I can't have you parading around the Colony grounds unprotected."
"What do I need protection for? I'll be out in the sun," I reminded him.
Giving me a patronizing smile, he shook his head. "There are others here who are not vampires."
"Like who?" I hadn't seen anyone other than the pointy teeth variety.
"Immortal servants."
I laughed. "Oh please, if they are anything like Mason, that's not going to be a problem." All I had to do was flash my fangs and ask them to do something and they would bend to my vampy will.
"Mason is loyal to me, which makes him eager to please me and my consorts, but the immortals at the Colony are loyal to the Colony," he said dryly.
I resisted the urge to kick something. My shoes were scuffed enough. "Are you saying they won't listen to me?"
"If they have been made aware of you, which by now...I'm sure they have...then no. They will be under strict orders to detain you in whatever means necessary."
That didn't sound ominous or anything, I thought shuddering. But, there was one thing Fang probably should know about me by now, I don't give up easily. "Then I will just have to make sure I don't get caught by any immortal minions." I waved a hand irritably and walked over to the trapdoor. "Now, give me a boost."
"I'm sorry," he said, sounding anything but. "I will not send you to your slaughter."
"Has anyone ever told you you're a pessimist?"
The pounding which we had become accustomed to hearing, changed. No longer was it the beating of fists against a door, but now it sounded strong, steady and relentless.
"What is that?" I asked, blinking up at Fang in confusion.
Cocking his head to the side he listened. He looked like Labrador retriever when he did that.
"I would have to say...it's a jackhammer," he said with a little wince.
Note to self, Druilla was more resourceful than Tim the Toolman Taylor.
"If you don't give me a leg up, then you are sacrificing me to her." I grabbed him by his meaty biceps and gave him a shake. "You asked me to trust you once, Fang and I did. Now, I'm asking you to do the same for me." I wasn't above using a guilt trip to get my way. Besides, I would rather face a hundred immortals than one Druilla.
He looked down at me and I could see the battle waging in his diamond yes. His full lips grew thin with displeasure. "It seems we are out of options. Though I am fully regenerated, I cannot hold off Druilla and how many others she may bring down upon us." He tilted my chin up. "But you must promise you will come back to me."
My heart lurched in my chest at his softly spoken request. Flinging my arms around his neck, I kissed him full on the mouth. Fang was so surprised by my enthusiasm, I nearly toppled him over.
Reluctantly, I let him go. "I will," I promised, peeking up into his glowing eyes with my own shining just as brilliantly, bathing his face in a greenish tint.
Bending down, he boosted me up and I scrambled out of the trapdoor as quickly as I could without letting in any light. Not an easy chore, I might add, but I must have managed it because I didn't hear Fang melting like the Wicked Witch of the West. Rolling off to the side, I jumped up on my feet and turned, ready and alert. But other than the chirping of some birds, the coast was clear. My eyes on the other hand felt like I had opened them under chlorine.
Heading across the grass, I hoofed it to where the gate was. Um...okay...there's an itty, bitty, teensy, wincey, tiny problem with my plan. I had kind of forgotten Fang had said the exit from the tunnel was on the "other side" of the Colony boundaries. Which meant, Gizmo was on the inside and I was presently standing stupid on the outside. Great.
I cranked my head back and looked at the intimidating wall and all that electrified wire. Even if I managed to get past all that without turning myself into a Pop Tart, there was still the razor wire sitting pretty on top waiting to slice and dice me. What I needed was another tunnel under the wall. Where was El Chapo when you needed him?
Walking along the wall, I searched for any chink in its armor. Any weakness I could creep through, but nada, zip, zero...nothing. Who says craftsmanship is lacking in America? Sighing, I leaned against a tree in frustration. Right now, I heartedly wished I had a tank or, better yet, the A Team. Hannibal would have some awesome plan to get around this stupid wall of well-built ingenuity. Hell...I would settle for BA's badass van. I always wanted one of those.
Looking up, I pondered what I was going to do when I saw two little squirrels fighting over a nut. It was rather comical until I noticed the limb they were squabbling on stretched up and over the fence. Holy Moses on a pogo stick! I jumped up. I had a thought...a lightning bolt, really. My ideas are like storms. There's this magnificent crash, some smoke and confusion and then BOOM...I have a brand spanking new idea from out of nowhere. The fact that sometimes they cause destruction is just a small consequence of my genius.
Testing the texture of the bark, I dug my hand in and started to pull myself up. In no time, I was scampering up the side of the tree like a boxelder bug. HA! Take that Mr. Hooper! Who needs to be able to climb your stupid rope in gym class when I could scale a sequoia faster than I could open a bag of Cheetos? I was speedy, I was powerful...I was Super Vamp!
Getting to the top, I gave a little jump and landed gracefully on the limb. In heels no less. Usually, I was well known for my random gravity checks when it came to coordination skills, but since turning into a vampire...I had become rather nimble. I could probably get away with running with scissors and not need a trip to the ER. It's amazing how much damage a pair of supposedly child safe scissors can do.
Walking one foot in front of the other, I made it to the end of the limb with minimum bowing and hovered a good 20 feet above the ground. Rather high, but at least I was over the damn wall. Taking my shoes off so I wouldn't snap a heel on landing, I took a deep breath and did a spectacular swan dive off the limb. I soared in the air like an eagle for a split second before landing softly on the other side. Whoop, whoop! That totally deserved a perfect score from the judges, I thought putting my shoes back on and hustling it towards my car.
There was an awful lot of open space between me and Gizmo, but I was so fast I was able to zip from bush to tree until I was within feet of my goal. Poking my head out from around a huge pot of begonias gracing the driveway, I looked to see if the coast was clear. I must have looked like a whack-a-mole, but as long as nobody was hovering over me with a sledgehammer, I didn't care. Not seeing a soul, I tiptoed over to my car. I was just about to give him a little smooch on the hood when a small voice set every nerve in my body on high alert.
"Who are you?"
As usual, Mel's ideas come with a few issues... Who has she run into? Will it be friend or foe?
Stay tuned for the next installment of FANGED to find out. Don't forget to come join the fun on my Facebook page K. M. Halandras for sneak peeks!
Hey everyone! I hope you enjoyed reading this story as much as I have enjoyed writing it. If you liked it please give it a vote and comments are always appreciated. If you don't see any updates here...check out my other stories Bending Steele, When Roses Collide or Stealing You Away.