Chapter 77: CHAPTER - 76

کِسٹ نمبر  - 16

"Mujhe usey zinda rakhna hi tha, yahi waada tha."

Woh bachpan se hi Aazam Shirazi ki sakht talkh baate sunta aaya tha. Hostel mein sab kabhi kabhi woh sabr kho deta tha, raato tak so nahi paata tha. Uska takiya aansuo se bheegta rehta tha. Uske dil mein ek aziyat si jo thehri hui thi. Usey normal hone mein waqt lagta tha. Aisa pehli baar aisa hua tha ke usne bilkul bhi waqt nahi liya. Uski aankhe nam nahi hui thi. Woh apne kamre mein chhup ke roya nahi tha. Uske andar ek dam se sab kuch sard par gaya tha, sab jam gaya tha.

Jameela Daud uski zindagi se ja chuki thi. Woh Dr. Mustafa aur Jannat ko bhi kho chuka tha. Ab usey apne kisi bhi nuqsaan par gham nahi ho raha tha. Apne kisi bhi dard par rona nahi aa raha tha. Usey acha waqt yaad nahi aa raha tha.

Usey bura waqt sakit nahi kar raha tha.

Woh bed par leta tha aur uth kar bahar aa gaya. Samne hi swimming pool tha. Woh pool ke kinare khada ho gaya. Ab woh waada yaad kar raha tha jo usne apne baap se kiya tha. Usey zinda rakhne ke liye kiya gaya tha.

Bhale se woh khud mit jaye, fana ho jaye lekin uski saanse chalni chahiye. Uska dil dhadakna chahiye. Uski aankhe nam hokar phir sukha gayi thi. Usne apne chhekho ka gala ghont diya. Khud ko kahi andar dafna diya. Door se kahi horn ki awaaz sunayi di. Shirazi farmhouse ka bahri gate khul gaya.

Teen gaadiya aage peeche andar aayi thi. Usne peeche mur kar dekha.

Siyah gaadi se Haroon Shirazi bahar nikla tha. Uske haath mein bag tha, doosre haath mein mobile tha. Uske saath kuch dost bhi the jo kisi baat par has rahe the. Uska clean-shave chehra taro taaza tha. Uske baalo se gel se jame the aur uske kapdo se mehnge perfume ki khushboo aa rahi thi.

Woh bohot khush aur pur-sukoon lag raha tha. Usne kisi bat par kehka bhi lagaya tha, Usne naukaro ko koi hukam diya aur phir uski nigah us par pad gayi aur woh wahi thithak gaya.

"Faris Wajdan, kisi mulazim ka beta!"

Woh swimming pool ke us paar khada tha aur woh usi ko dekh raha tha. Woh apne dosto mein ghira hua tha par apni jagah munjamid hua tha. Ab tak kisi ki bhi tawajju us 14-15 sala us ladke ke taraf nahi gayi thi. Lawn mein barbeque ka intezaam ho raha tha. Shirazi house se jo naukar aaye the woh kaam shuru kar chuke the. Koyle jalaye ja rahe the aur khuli hawa mein dhuaan bharne laga. Uskk saas ghutni laga.

"Agar Haroon 'Papa' kehte hue uske paas aa gaya toh?"

Wahan koi naukar nahi tha, koi rok tok ya deewar nahi thi. Na Mudhat na Aanaa Ali, na Aazam Shirazi. Ab wahan sirf woh tha aur uska beta tha.

No saal guzar chuke the aur Haroon Shirazi apne andar kahin usi waqt ke daayre mein, usi maqam par atka hua tha. Uska dar, uska khayal, uski ghabraahat aaj bhi wahi thi.

Woh larka…

Woh Faris...

Sirf ek lafz, "Papa",

aur sab kuch khatam, sab kuch fana.

Usne Faris Wajdan ki aankho mein aag dekhi. Har shey fana kar dene ka junoon dekha.

Usne sab paane ke liye jise chhorh diya tha, wohi sab raakh karne ke liye ab saamne tha. Jaise ek jhalak thi. Aane wale waqt ka trailer tha ke woh kaise taqat rakhta hai, kaise unhe barbaad kar sakta hai. Magar woh na hua jiska darr tha.

Faris Wajdan kadam ghaseet-ta hua andar chala gaya. Usne darwaza band kar liya. Usne khidkiya bhi band kar di aur un par parde daal diye. Yoon jaise usne apne baap ke dil ki har hikayat parh li ho, har khauf dekh liya ho, har khadsha mehsoos kar liya ho.

Aankho mein khadshaat liye Haroon Sherazi apni jagah khada reh gaya. Usne aakhri nigah un jamud, murda aur sulagti hui zakhmi nigaho par daali.

Nau saal ka arsa beet gaya tha. Magar ek chhe saal ke bachhe ka pukarte hue uski taango ke gird lipatne ka woh manzar maazi ka tehra reh gaya tha.

Aaj toh koi rukawat bhi na thi. Na aagha tha, na Mudhat thi, na koi guard, na mulazim. Aaj koi bhi nahi tha. Aur uska beta wapas laut gaya tha. Usne koi lafz ada nahi kiya tha, usko koi awaaz nahi di thi. Woh uski mehfil mein mukhil nahi hua tha. Uske dosto ke saamne nahi aaya tha. Woh hosh bakhta tha. Apni jagah munjamid khada tha.

Aur tabhi Haider ujalat mein kadam uthata hua darwaze se bahar aaya. Usko hairat hui ke woh Azam Sherazi ka personal guard tha. Woh hamesha unke saath kisi saaye ki tarah rehta tha. Unke har behrooni daure mein woh unke saath hota tha. Usko yaqeen nahi aaya ke Azam Sherazi uske bagair hi kisi safar par chale gaye.

Haider ke lehje mein ek tashweesh wazeh thi. Haroon se baat karte hue usne apni tasalli ke liye us taraf zaroor dekha jahan se Faris ke kamre ki khidki aur ek darwaza bahar ko khulta tha.

Uske liye Haroon Shirazi ka aamad gair mutwaqqa thi, Shayad dosto ke saath yeh plan bhi achanak ban gaya tha.

Haroon ne sar jhatak kar apne doston ki taraf rujhan kiya. Usne zabardasti muskurane ki koshish ki, magar woh muskurana nahi saka. Sawal karti zakhmi nigahe ka naqsh uske zehen par chhapa hua tha. Uski halat ajeeb si ho gayi thi. Woh kursi se uth gaya. Uske liye wahan theharna mushkil ho gaya.

Woh apne dosto ke saath khud plan bana kar aaya tha aur ab maafi maang raha tha. Usne kaha ke woh wahan nahi ruk sakta. Usne zaroori call ka bahaana kar diya. Kaam ka bahaana bana diya.

Usko apne wade ka bhi paas rakhna tha. Usko apne maqsad ko bhi yaad rakhna tha. Agar woh ruk gaya toh kabhi aage nahi badh paayega aur agar mur gaya toh sab yahin khatam ho jayega. Khud ko samjhata hua, fayde nuqsanat ginwate, woh gaadi mein baith gaya aur wahiin se Shirazi farmhouse se chala gaya. Faris ki ek jhalak ne uske purane zakhmo ko taaza kar diya tha. Usko Aarzoo Jahangir yaad aa gayi. Uske saath guzara hua ek ek pal yaad aa gaya tha.

Woh aankhe Aarzoo ki thi, chehra bhi uska hi tha. Nau saal pehle usne usko tor diya tha. Nau saal baad usne wahi tassur apne bete ki aankho mein dekha.

•••

Haider mamool ki tarah andar aaya toh darwaza halka sa khula hua tha. Magar kamre mein andhera tha.

Haadse ke baad in chaar mahino mein aisa pehli dafa hua tha ke uske kamre mein andhera tha. Usne ek dam se haath badhakar lights on kar di.

Woh khidki ke neeche carpet par baitha hua tha. Jaise aam taur par woh Shirazi mansion mein apne kamre ki khidki ke paas baitha karta tha.

Woh khidki ke neeche baitha karta tha. Ghutno par kohaniya rakhe samne kisi nazer na aane waale nuqte ko dekhta hua. Uski aankhe bilkul khamosh aur sunsaan si thi. Chehra bilkul sapaat tha. Woh thande farsh par baitha tha lekin usko thand mehsoos nahi ho rahi thi. Woh kapka nahi raha tha. Apne kamre mein din raat roshni chahne ke bawajood woh ekdum se andhere ko apnane laga tha.

Haider kuch dair tak apni jagah khada raha. Usko woh theek nahi lag raha tha. Uski yeh haalat yaqeenan apne baap ko dekhne par hui thi, magar woh hairaan tha. Woh phone par report karne ke baad bhi hairaan tha. Woh apne baap ke paas nahi gaya tha. Usne unki mehfil mein koi khalal nahi daala tha. Koi tamasha nahi kiya tha. Shirazi ke ghar mein jaise uska baap nahi, koi ajnabi aaya tha.

ek aadat jo bachpan se thi, woh usi aadat par qayam tha. Shirazi Mansion ka servant quarter, uska kamra  Woh khidki jk har jagah se Shirazi house ka manzar dikhati thi. jo ek mukammal khandan ka manzar dikhati thi. Woh manzar jisme uska baap hota tha. Baap jo uske baghair khush tha. Aaj bhi khush nazar aa raha tha.

•••

Hospital ke ICU ke samne woh bench par sar jhukaaye baithi thi. Mobile haath me tha. Ab tak jaane kitni baar Faris Wajdan ko call kar chuki thi magar woh uski calls recieve nahi kar raha tha. Adil Ahmed, uske guards, kisi ko ilm nahi tha ke woh kahan gaya tha. Raat ke is pehar apni surkh hoti aankho ko baar baar ragar kar gehri saans lekar usne sar uthaya tha. Nigahe ek baar phir band darwaze par thehar gayi thi. Uska chehra tar hone laga. Ek hi jagah par, ek hi position mein baithe rehna mushkil ho gaya tha. Kamar mein dard hone laga toh uth kar tehlne lagi. Larazte, kaampte haathon se usne dobara call aur message kiye. Mobile band ho raha tha. Usse apna dil band hota mehsoos ho raha tha. Uski haalat aisi ho rahi thi jaise woh bas ek pal mein sab kuch kho dene wali ho.

Haan, woh sab kho dene wali thi.

Nurse se pooch kar woh namaz ke liye mukhtis ek kamre mein chali gayi thi.

Sajde mein rote hue usne Mrs. Shirazi ki sehatyabi aur Fa

aris ki wapas aane ki dua ki.

Ek baar pehle bhi woh sajde mein gayi thi. Apni maa ke waqt itna sadma tha ke sahi se dua ka moqa hi na mil saka tha. Woh kuch kar hi na saki thi, kuch keh hi na saki thi. Aur ab woh apne Rab se sab kuch keh dena chahti thi. Galtiya usse bhi bohot hui thi. Lekin uski saza yeh nahi honi chahiye thi. Iss tarah nahi honi chahiye thi. Ab koi bhi rishta kho dene ka hosla us mein nahi tha. Ab kisi nafrat ka muqabla karne ki taqat nahi thi. Woh phir se tanha, besahara nahi hona chahti thi. Usne bohot dard aur shiddat se, rote aur siskate hue un tamaam rishto ko manga jo uske haath se chhut ti ja rahi the.

Uske qadmon se zameen nikal rahi thi. Usko sar se aasman behne ka ehsaas ho raha tha. Lekin uske labo par ek hi dua thi.

"Bhale se uske haath khaali reh jaaye. Tanhayi muqaddar ho jaaye. Raste juda ho jaaye. Galti ki jo saza milni hai mil jaye, magar Faris Wajdan ki zindagi se Mrs. Shirazi na jaayein. Woh theek ho jaaye. Wapas aa jaaye."

Uski behno ne maa ko uski wajah se khoya tha. Woh khud ko unka mujrim samajhti thi.

Uski wajah se Faris apne kisi pyare rishte ko na khoye. Uski bas ab ek hi dua thi.

•••

Uska ma'ooaf hota dimagh kisi aur raah par chal nikla tha. Jo baate kabhi na sochi thi, woh ab sochne laga tha. Jo khayal kabhi na aaya tha ab aane laga tha. Usey Shirazi khandan se alag hona tha. Usey is ghar ko chhorhna tha. Azam Shirazi ke tasallut se azaad hona tha aur aisa sirf ek surat mein hi mumkin tha. Usne farar ke liye raat ka waqt chuna tha. 12 baje ke baad woh bahar nikal gaya tha.

Har shoo tariki me baag ka wo rasta numaya ho raha tha, wo is par bhagta hua pathrili sadko par pahuch gaya tha. Ye jagah Roshan thi. Yaha din ka sama maloom hota tha. Niche ki taraf road tha,  aur upar kahi restaurant ki khidkiya nazar aa rahi thi, Wo qadam uthate apni jagah thithak kar ruk gaya tha.

Azam Shirazi, shalwar suit mein malboos, siyah rang ki shawl kandho par dale apne guard ke humrah seedhiya utarte isi taraf aa rahe thay. Beech raste mein usey nage pair seedhiyan charhta dekh kar ruk gaye. Wo bhi ruk gaya. Das barah seedhiyo ka jo faasla tha wo fasla phir unhone tay kiya tha.

Un ke liye utarna aasan tha.Uske liye charhna mushkil ho gaya tha. Uske ghutne chhile hue the. Jeans bhi phati hui thi. Ghaliban wo upar charhte hue kahi gir bhi gaya tha.

Car haadse ke baad ba-zaabta tor par ye pehli mulaqat thi. Wo pehli baar is tarah uske samne aaye the. Use lagta tha agar wo usey kahi nazar aayege to wo zabt kho dega. Wo chikhne lagega. Wo un par hamla kar dega. Magar wo kuch bhi nahi kar saka tha. Wo apni jagah se aik inch bhi nahi hila tha.

Kya yehi tha wo raab jo wo uske andar bachpan se bharte aaye hain? Kya ye wahi khauf hai jo uske qadam jakad chuka hai? Usey to lagta tha ke nafrat ke siwa kuch bhi mehsoos nahi karta. Wo kabhi bhi unke samne jhuk nahi sakta, dar nahi sakta. Uske andar unke liye sirf aag jese jazbaat the. To ab achanak ye uske saath kya ho gaya tha? Wo ruk kyon gaya tha? Wo un par cheekh kyun nahi raha tha? Kuch keh kyon nahi raha tha? Uske andar lava jese aag thi. Uske jazbaat dekhte hue angare the.Uske qadmon se zameen kheench gayi. Uske andar toor phoor hone lagi. Us ki rooh ke zakhm phir se udhar rahe the. Woh bohot si cheekho ki zed mein tha. Aaine ki tarah tut kar, tukdo mein bata hua. Apne aks mein hi zakhmi ho raha tha. Magar woh unhein koi bhi rad-e-amal nahi de sakta tha.

Azam Shirazi us ke samne the. Aur woh lab siye khada tha.

"Kahan ja rahe ho tum?" Unhone kalai mod kar waqt dekhte hue us se poocha. Use woh sawal apna mazaq udaata hua laga. Woh achhi tarah se jaante the bhari duniya mein na us ki koi jagah thi na ghar, na manzil. Aur woh phir bhi farar ke raste dhoond raha tha.

Unhone yahan wahan nigah daurai. Jaise kuch dhoondh rahe ho, Faris apni aankho mein qissa aur qabar liye apni jagah khada raha. Bhaagne se saans chadhi hui thi. Cheeram surkh ho raha tha. Guard faasle par ruk gaya tha.

"Yahan se nikal kar kahan jaoge?" Apne tor par sanjeedgi se khoda

"Aarzoo ke paas?"

Us ki muthiya sakhti se is qadar pighri gayi ke ungliyon ke jor surkh ho gaye.

Us ki aankho se nafrat aur adawat ki chingariyan phootne lagi. Aisa hi ek sard aur hebat naak sa tasir un ki aankhon mein bhi bina kya. Labo par halki muskurahat ki aa gayi.

"Tumhari maa ne bhi mujhe aise hi dekha tha jab maine use naukri se nikala tha. Us ke khayal tha woh mujhe phansa legi. Lekin phir haroon use aasaan target laga."

Yeh inkishaaf us ke hifazat ke hisson par nikli ban kar gira. Aur woh andar teek saakin ho gaya. Adawat ke taane haane peeche kahi aur ja kar milte the. Nafrat ke peechay ek wajah thi. Inteqam yunhi nahi liya jata. Barbad karne ke liye bhi usool waza karne padte hain.

"Woh ek chaalak aurat hai. Khane ka sauda bhi nahi karti. Intiqam lene par aaye to phir har had se guzar jaati hai…"

Uske kadmo se zameen kheech gayi, uske andar tod fod hone lagi.

"Tumhara kya khayal hai usne Haroon se talaq lene ke liye mujhse kitne paise liye hoge?" Woh mutohash sa unki aankho mein aankhein daale khada tha aur ek dum se uski aankhein bhi thi. Usne kahin aur dekhna chaha, kisi aur taraf...

"Abhi pichle hafte usne shaadi ki hai. Meri umar ka aadmi hai. Paise me itni taqat hoti hai let's see ye shaadi kitne arse tak chalti hai." Usse laga woh uspar has rahe hai. Uski zaat ka, uske wajood ka tamaskhur uda rahe hain. Usse bata rahe hain ke woh aisi aurat ka beta hai.

"Agar maa ke paas ja rahe ho to soch lo ke kaisi maa ke paas ja rahe ho?"

Unhone khud se, apne tor par qayas kar liya tha ke woh unke tasallut se aazad ho kar sirf apni maa ke paas hi jaana chahega. Woh maa jisne guzishta 10 saalo mein ek baar bhi palat kar khabar nahi li thi.

Woh aurat jo uski zindagi mein nahi thi. Woh uske wajood se hi pehchana jaa raha tha. Woh uska naam adhoora kar chuke the. Uski pehchaan moshih kar chuke the. Usse tamaam rishte chheen chuke the. Phir bhi unki nafrat, unka gussa kam nahi ho raha tha. Unka dil naram nahi ho raha tha. Unka inteqam khatam nahi ho raha tha. Unhein aur kya chahiye? Uska dimaag phatne laga, aankhe nam ho gayi.

Woh mutthiya sakhti se bheench ke, gehri saanse lene laga.

"Iske dada ko usse aur kya chahiye?" Woh yahan wahan dekhte, apne andar ki cheekhon mein fanaa ho raha tha.

"Pichle kuch mahino se Aarzoo Haroon se milne ki koshish kar rahi hai? Tumhara kya khayal hai, kis liye? Usse ab kya chahiye?" Unhone aankhon mein sakhti liye sawal uchhala.

"Tum…"

"Aur tumse kya chahiye?"

Sawal karke unhone uski zaat ke purkhe udha diye.

"J&E International hamari hareef (rivals) hai. Woh is company ke chairman ki ab doosri biwi hai. Baqi tum khud samjhdar ho…"

"Mujhse milne aayegi toh main tumhara dead certificate usey dikha dunga. Qabar par jana chahegi toh woh bhi tayyar hai"

Mansooba saaz ne sab hi mansoobe tayar kar rakhe the. Unhein ek lamhe ke liye bhi apne alfazon ki talkhi ka koi ehsaas nahi hua. Is baat ka bhi nahi ke woh is masoom zehen mein zehar bharte hue usey apne aap mein khatam karte ja rahe hain. Unhone yeh bhi nahi socha ke woh maut ki sarhado ko chhoo kar palta tha aur abhi tak is haadse ke asar se bahar nahi nikla tha. Unhein yeh bhi yaad nahi ke psychiatrist ne usey sadmo se bachaye rakhne ka mashwara diya tha. Koi bhi aisi baat na ho jo uski tabiyat par garan guzre. Koi bhi aisa sawal jo is haadse ki yaad taza kare. Koi bhi aisa waaqia jo uski takleef ko trigger karde.

"Yeh tumhari bhool hai ke tum meri marzi ke baghair kahin bhi jaa sakte ho." Qadam uthate qareeb se guzre.

"Kam az kam apne khandan ka tamasha banane ke liye main tumhein us aurat ke hawale kabhi nahi karunga. Kabhi nahi."

Woh seerhiya utarne lage aur utarte gaye, apne guard ke hamrah... Woh saans roke unhein dekhta raha, dekhta raha. Yahan tak ke woh nazron se ojhal ho gaye.

Usne yun saans li jaise woh uski aakhri saans ho. Aur yun mehsoos kiya jaise woh sach mein kisi qabar mein utaar diya gaya ho. Usey Azam Shirazi se kisi bhi narami aur reham ki tawaqqa nahi thi magar itni sakhti ki bhi nahi ke woh usey Jeete jee maar dete. Uski qabar bhi tayar kar lete. Woh mushkil se saans lete hue neeche baith gaya. Door se Haider pathreli seedhiya chadhta uski taraf aa raha tha. Usne usey dekha aur sar ghera liya. Us din ke baad usne faraar ki koshish dobara kabhi nahi ki thi.

•••

Raat ke aakhri pehar Haroon Shirazi ki aankh khul gayi thi aur woh uth kar baith gaya tha. Hathailiyo par kitni hi dair tak sar jhukaye raha. Woh jab se Pakistan se aaya tha uski kefiyat kuch ajeeb si thi. Roz marra ke mamlaat mein koi farq nahi tha magar ab raat mein aksar woh uth jata tha. Usey theek se neend nahi aati thi. Baithe baithe koi na koi baat karte hue, sunte hue, koi kaam zimme lagate hue woh apne alfazon mein ulajh jata tha. Uska zehen bhatakta. Uski soch mein bas ek chehra thehar jata tha. Samaat mein bas ek awaaz utar jati thi. Guzishta nau saal usne kis kadar mazbooti se, be-hisi se, aur apni zaat ke liye bohot mutmaeen ho kar guzar diye the. Uske paas apne har faisle ki hujjat aur daleel thi. Woh khud ko mazloom samajhta tha. Baap ka faisla jabran musallat kiya gaya tha. Usey maanna us par farz kar diya gaya tha.

Jo waar Aarzoo Jahangir ne uski zaat par, uske aitmaad par kiya tha, us waar se woh in nau saalon mein theek nahi ho saka tha.

Uske liye Aarzoo Jahangir aur Faris ek ho gaye the. Apni is aziyat se nikalne ke liye woh dono Aarzoo hi nazar andaaz karne laga tha. Aarzoo uski zindagi se nikal gayi thi. Faris ko usne khud hi nikaal diya tha. Woh uska ek maazi, uski ghalti, uski zindagi ka ek naa-pasandeeda baab ban gaya tha.

Uska sirf ek hi beta hai, woh is par khud ko yaqeen dila chuka tha. Apne naam, status, aur khandani jah o hashamat ke hisaab se woh khud ko ek but mein dhal chuka tha. Uski soch apne baap jaisi ho gayi thi.

Ab uski nazar kisi mumkinah scandal par theher gayi thi. Uske hareefo ko kamzori mil jayegi aur uski zaat par keechad uchala jayega. Aarzoo Jahangir ne shohrat, dolat aur duniyavi kamiyabiyo ke liye har had paar kar di thi. Uske mutaliq jo khabre media ki zeenat banti thi, woh achi noiyat ki nahi thi. Aisi kisi bhi aurat ki zindagi ka hissa ya uska sabiqa shauhar hona uske liye sharmindagi ka bais tha. Usey apni ghalti ka ehsaas shiddat se hua tha. Arzu se uski aulaad nahi honi chahiye thi. Usey chahiye tha woh Faris ko wapas lane ke bajaye kisi foster home mein chhod deta. Is se ye hota ke woh uski zindagi se mukammal tor par kharij ho jata. Kisi saza ki tarah uske aas paas na rehta. Uski soch ko ek dum se brake lagi thi. Woh apni jagah ruk gaya tha. Pathar ho gaya tha.

"Woh ye kya soch raha tha?"

"Kya chah raha tha?"

"Woh aisa pehle toh kabhi nahi tha, aisa be-his toh kabhi nahi! Ab aisa kyun ho raha tha?" Mutohash ho kar usne apna sar pakar liya.

Guzishta 9 saalo mein sirf ibtedai chand maheene uske liye mushkil rahe the jab woh apne chhote se bacche ko hamesha hamesha ke liye chhor kar gaya tha. Aur ab achanak uske liye har lamha bohot mushkil ho gaya tha. Uske bete ki aankho ne uska sukoon cheen liya tha. Woh aankhe uski aankho mein gir gayi thi. Woh taassur sab raakh kar raha tha.

❏❏❏