Chapter 62: •CHAPTER-61•

قِسط نمبر 13

Woh bed par uske paas hi baithi thi, uska haath apne haath mein liye, jhuk kar uske pur sukoon chehre ko dekhte hue saanson ko ginte hue. Kuch der pehle hi woh kapde badalne ke baad neend ki goli lekar so gaya tha aur woh tab se uske paas baithi hui thi. Ang ang mein fikar aur ek anjaana sa khauf samaaya hua tha. Neend udd chuki thi. Sukoon garat ho chuka tha. Usse is tarah achanak, is roop mein dekh kar uska dil bohot se andesho mein ghir gaya tha. Woh bay-had pareshan ho rahi thi.

Qehar barsaata lehja aur shola chalagati aankhein to jaise zehan mein sama gayi thi. Usse itni azeeyat mein dekhne ke baad apni ghalti ka shiddat se ehsaas hone laga. Mrs. Shirazi ne roka tha, to usse ruk jaana chahiye tha. Shayad usse kisi aur tareeke se baat karni chahiye thi. Ek yateem bache ke liye pathar hote dil ko kisi aur tareeke se mom karna chahiye tha. Usne socha.

Magar woh aisa kaise karti? Mrs. Shirazi usse kuch bhi batane ko tayyar nahi thi aur Faris usne to darwaza khulne se pehle hi band kar diya tha. Ek hi jumla, pathhar par lakeer jaisa Phir Rayyan ka zikar aur uski lahu rang aankhon se jhalakti waazeh tanbeeh,

"Agar tum chahti ho ke hamare darmiyan sab theek rahe, to aindha tum uska naam nahi logi mere saamne." Usse yaqeen nahi aa raha tha, yeh baat usse Faris Wajdan ne kahi thi. Woh jo uske liye kuch bhi karne ko tayyar tha, woh is tarah sakht alfazo mein ek hadd numaya karega ?

Usne gehri saans lekar aziyat se aankhein moond li. Mrs. Shirazi ka gham ek taraf, Rayyan ki fikr doosri taraf, aur Faris ka ishtiaal amaiz ravaiya teesri taraf tha. Ek zara si umeed thi ke baat karke masla hal kar legi, lekin yeh umeed bhi khaak ho gayi thi. Khushk labo ko tar karte hue usne zakhm saaf karke patti baandh di.

Faris ke liye kuch tasalli karke sone ki koshish ki to baar baar uska chehra aankho mein aane laga. Woh kitna ghusse mein lag raha tha aur kis qadar ajnabi sa ho gaya tha, jaise woh usse jaanta tak nahi tha. Usse bohot andar tak dukh hua.

Raat karwaate badalte, khud se ulajhte, aur situation ko sochte hue guzargayi. Baar baar uski aankh khulti rahi, uska khayal aata raha, uski fikr hoti rahi.

Namaz ki adaigi ke baad, woh uski talaash mein tez tez qadam uthati kamre se bahar aayi thi. Rahedaari mein neem tareeki thi. Deewaro par lagi khidkiyo se subah ke aasar numaya ho rahe the. Sooraj ki roshni abhi zameen par nahi utri thi, magar ujala har taraf phail chuka tha.

Usne Faris ko kitchen mein khada dekha. Fajr ki namaz ke baad woh yaqeenan apne liye qahwa bana raha tha. Aahat par zara sa rukh badal kar usse dekhne laga. Nazar bilkul khaali aur weeraan lag rahi thi. Jannat ka dil shiddat se dhadak utha. Cabinet band karte hue usne chaar rakha aur aanch dheemi kar di.

"Qahwa bana raha hoon, tum piyogi?" Uska lehja naram tha. Taa'suraat mein koi sakhti nahi thi, na hi andaz aur ravayye mein kisi talakhi ka shaaibah tha. Wo Faris wajdan ko dekhti reh gayi.

Usne fikar aur pareshani mein saari raat sote-jagte guzari thi, aur woh subah se aise mukhatib ho raha tha jaise guzashta shab unke darmiyan koi baat nahi hui thi. Jaise usne sakht tassurat nahi diya tha, na hi kisi baat par mushtail hua tha. Aankhon mein fikar aur dil mein izteraab liye usne sar hilate hue usay ijazat dedi.

Faris ki peeth ab uski taraf thi. Woh sar jhukaaye khamoshi se qahwa bana raha tha. Aag ke neelgo sholo par rakha ubalta paani apna rang badal chuka tha. Woh kursi par baith gayi, ungliyo mein ungliya phansaaye, andar ke izteraab ko chupane ki koshish karte hue.

Faris ne cup mein qahwa daal kar uske saamne rakha aur doosra cup haath mein liye kursi kheench kar uske paas baith gaya.

Kuch dair tak uski nigaahein bhaap uthaate cup par jami rahi. Phir usne sar utha kar Faris ko dekha. Yeh khayal tha ke shayad ab woh kuch kahega, koi wazaahat dega, ya koi baat karega. Shayad narmi se kuch samjha dega ya apne ravaiye ki wajah batadega. Magar doosri taraf gehri khamoshi ke siwa aur kuch nahi tha.

Chand lamho ke baad usne bilkul aam lehje mein Jannat se tabiyat ka poocha, bilkul waise hi jaise roz poocha karta tha. Phir apne masroof schedule ka hawala diya. Gyarah baje meeting thi, usse nau baje nikalna tha. 12 baje ki wapsi ki tawaqqa thi, usay mrs. Shirazi  ko weakly check up ke liye hospital le jana tha, chand ek sawal ka muntazir jawab deti, na smjhi ke aalam me usay dekhti reh gayi thi.

Bawajood koshish ke, woh koi sawaal nahi kar saki, na yeh pooch saki ke usne aisa kyun kiya. Na rawaiye ki wajah jaan saki, yeh haq uske paas nahi tha. Faris Wajdan ke mamlaat mein woh mudakhlat nahi kar sakti thi. Guzashta raat us par yeh had waazeh hui thi aur yeh soch usay be-had ghamzadah kar rahi thi.Aankhon mein nami liye, usne khud par qaboo paate hue sar jhuka liya. Faris ne uske daine haath par apna haath rakha, usay yun laga jaise woh kuch kehna chahta ho, magar doosre hi pal apni shakhsiyat ke gehre rangon mein doobte hue, uska haath thapthapa kar uth gaya.

Faris ka ravaiya samajh se bilkul baahar tha.  Zyada tar to sar hilaane par hi iktifa karta. Apni soch aur khayalaat mein itna gum rehne laga tha ke woh baat shuru karke khatam bhi kar chuki hoti aur usse maaloom hi na hota ke woh kya keh rahi thi. Kya poochh rahi thi. Kya suna rahi thi. khali zehni ke aalam mein ek hi maqam par ruk jata, file ke kisi page par bay-tarteeb se lakiren kheenchte, lawn mein be-maqsad tehelta, channel ghoomta, ya briefing sunta, lekin kuch samajh nahi aata. Woh kisi bhi tarah usse apne aap mein nahi lagta tha.

Uska har kaam adhoora, har baat be-maqsad. Har taseer dhundla hone lagi thi. Woh ab usse samajh nahi paati thi. Kabhi kabhi usse hairat hoti thi, kabhi pareshaani, aur kabhi gussa. Ek pandrah maah ke bache se aisi dushmani? Aisa rawaiyya? Mare hue bhai se ikhtilaf apni jagah, lekin ek zinda wajood ko laash bana dena? Yeh kahan ka insaaf tha, kahan ka badla? Kaha ka inteqam tha?

Apne andar ke sawalato se uljhte hue woh besaakhi se samajhne ki koshish karti. Tasuraat kuch normal karke Faris ke paas jaati, lekin bawajood koshish ke, us Rayyan ka naam na le paati. Dimag ki bahas apni jagah thi, lekin dil chahta tha ke usse koi gham na ho, dukh na ho, gussa na aaye. Jab woh Faris Wajdan ki aankhon mein dekhti, to saari uljhan wahi reh jaati thi. Kuch poochhne ka, ya use khojne ka hosla hi nahi bachta.

Masla baat se hal nahi ho sakta tha. Usne yeh jaan liya tha. Ab usse koi aur raasta dhoondhna tha, koi aur hal talashna tha. Pichhle kai raato ki tarah, us raat bhi woh kaafi zyada bechain rahi. Neend aankhon se door thi, to uth kar wuzu kiya, nawaafil ada kiye, aur dil se dua ki. Subah nashte ke baad, workout se farigh hote hi, woh Mrs. Shirazi ke paas chali gayi. Woh sitting area mein kitaab liye baithi thi, laptop khula pada tha, kuch files aur registers bhi the.

"Main aapse kuch puchhna chahti hu auntie," usne himmat jama karke kaha.

"Haan, puchho!" Unhone apni glasses hata kar uski taraf dekha. Woh ek relaxed se dress mein thi, baalo ki French choti bana rakhi thi, aur chehre par kuch fikr mand asaar numaya the. Aankhon mein soch thi, sawal tha, aur ek ajeeb si uljhan, jo aksar tab hi nazar aati thi jab woh kisi mushkil mein hoti.

"Ek masla hai." Lafz jodne mein thodi mushkil hui. "Mujhe laga ke mere paas iska hal hai. Main ne woh hal azmaya, lekin usse wo masla aur zyada bigad gaya. Yeh mera khayal hai." Usne ruk kar apne sookhe labo ko tar kiya. Mrs. Shirazi ki taraf dekha, unki aankhon mein tashweesh numaya hui.

"Yeh koi itna bara masla nahi hai," usne foran se sambhal kar wazahat di. "Yeh mera maamla hai, meri family ka. Behno ka." Nazar churaate huay keh diya.

Mrs. Shirazi ne andar hi andar sukoon ki saans li, ke masle ka taluq Faris se nahi tha. Andar hi andar, Jannat is baat par sharminda hui ke usne jhoot bola, lekin woh Mrs. Shirazi ko kisi dukh ya takleef mein nahi daalna chahti thi.

"Accha!" Unhone thoda fikrmand hote huay kaha, "Agar mumkin hal masle ko aur zyada bigaar raha ho toh?" Unhone daanista baat adhoori chor di.

Mrs. Shirazi ne kuch dair ruk kar socha, aur phir kaha, "iska matlab to yahi hua jise tum hal samajh rahi ho wo hal nahi hai."

Jannat ek pal ke liye ruk gayi, "Agar is ek mumkina hal ke ilawa koi aur raasta na ho to?"

Mrs. Shirazi ne use dekh kar reh gayi, jane wo apni bheno ke kis masle se pareshan thi. Unhe fiqr hui, "Jagah badal kar dekho! Ho sakta hai ke kisi aur nazariye se dekhne par tumhein sahi hal nazar aa jaaye."

Jannat ne chonk kar unhe dekha. Unhone side table par rakhe laptop par haath badhakar kuch type kiya. Phir dobara uski taraf dekha. "Ya phir is wajah ko dhoondo jiske sabab masla paida ho raha hai." Unhone mazeed kaha. Woh nichla lab kaanti khud se uljha hua reh gayi.

"Wajah to hai, aur koi bahut badi wajah hai lekin main us tak nahi pahunch sakti."

"Phir hal tak kaise pahunch gayi?" Unhone sawal kiya aur woh la jawab ho gayi. Chand lamho tak kuch keh nahi saki.

"Tum jis jagah par khadi ho kar poore masle ko dekh rahi ho, woh jagah galat hai. Wahan se jo manzar tumhe nazar aa raha hai, woh manzar adhoora hai. Tum masle ki teh tak jab tak nahi pahunchogi, hal nahi dhoondh sakti. Jo us lihaza se Jis hal ko tum samajh hal rahi ho, woh hal nahi hai Jannat!"

Unhone apne fahm ke mutabiq be had sanjeedgi se uski mushkil hal karne ki koshish ki. Woh chand lamho tak unhe dekhti rahi. Mrs. Shirazi wajah jaante hue bhi is masle ko hal nahi kar saki.

Maamla wahi atka hua tha. Dooriya hanuz qaim thi. Woh bebas thi. Unke haath mein kuch nahi aa raha tha. Aur usne socha tha woh sab theek kar legi. Baat karke Faris ko mana legi. Jab Mrs. Shirazi kuch na kar saki to woh kaise kuch kar sakti thi?

"Ho sakta hai main is masle ki teh tak pahunchun aur mujh par intesaaf ho ki is ka to koi hal hai hi nahi." Uske lehje mein mayoosi dar aayi thi.

Mrs. Shirazi Mushaf utha chuki thi. Khulte khulte ruk gayi. Sar uthakar usse dekha.

"Hal har masle ka hota hai. Kuch hal hamare haatho mein de diye jaate hain. Kuch hal Allah apne haathon mein rakhta hai." Ek lamha ruk kar glasses laga liye.

“Wasa'at ke mutabiq har mumkin koshish karo aur baaki Allah par chhod do.”

Baat khatam ho gayi. Woh phir se apna kaam karne lagi. Jannat chand lamho tak unhe dekhti rahi phir ek gehri saans bhar kar wahan se uth gayi. Kuch masle har zaaviye se ek hi nazar aate hain. Usne socha. Aqbi darwaza khol kar lawn mein aa gayi.

"Agar tum chahti ho hamare darmiyan sab theek rahe to aindah tum naam nahi logi uska mere saamne." Khuli fiza mein sans lete Faris ko sochti rahi.

Qahr barsaata lehja tha. Shola dehkata hui aankhein thi. Ajnabiat aur begani thi. Gussa tha aur nafrat thi. Is ek masoom bachay se jo uska bhatija tha. Uski shahed rang aankho mein phir se nami ubhri. Chehra surkh hone laga.

"Agar tum chahti ho hamare darmiyan sab theek rahe to tum is maamle mein nahi padogi." Wazeh dhamki thi, ishaara tha, tanbeeh thi.

Lab bhinch kar usne apni aankho ko masal dala. Uske haath khaali the. Na masla samajh mein aa raha tha, na hal nazar aa raha tha. Bebasi ka yeh ehsaas dil par bhaari tha. Aur be had bhaari tha.

•••

Jannat ki aankh khuli to us waqt barah baje ka waqt tha. Sofa par neem daraz position mein thi. Ek dum se uth kar baith gayi. Atraaf mein nigah daudai to aas paas koi nazar na aaya. TV on tha. Volume band.

Usay Yaad aaya, Faris match dekh raha tha jab woh uske paas aakar baithi thi. Kamar mein dard tha, tabiyat bhi kuch theek nahi thi aur kuch guzashta raat ki be-aaraami ki wajah se sofa par lete lete hi so gayi thi. Gehri saans lekar usne be-tarteeb balo ko phir se pony mein jakda aur uth kar kitchen mein chali aayi. Karhi par baith kar paani pee rahi thi jab deewar gir khidki ke us paar se hulchal ka ehsaas hua. Awaaze bhi aa rahi thi. Lakdi ke unche liye stool par takhte rakhe the. Adeel Ahmed bhi tha shaayad. Faras bhi. Dupatte ko phela kar lete hue woh ussi waqt bahar aayi thi. Awazo ke taaqub mein mashriqi simt qadam uthaye aage badhi aur agle hi pal hairat se ruk gayi.

Samne wali deewar par paint ho raha tha. Neeche paint ki baltian, brush aur roller waghera rakhe the.

Mulaazim ne seedhi pakad rakhi thi. Faris upar chadha hua tha. Apni safed shirt ki aasteenein kehnion tak mode aur syaah pant ko ghutno tak fold karke apni tie se ulajhta Adeel Ahmed usse bhi upar kahin takhte par khada tha. Dono ke maabain office ke maamlaat par guftagu ho rahi thi. Adeel modab sa Faris ke har sawaal ka jawab deta bulandi se kuch kuch khaif aur ghabraya hua sa lag raha tha.

"Yeh kya ho raha hai?" Uske sahi ma’non mein chaudah tabaq roshan ho gaye the.

“Paint ho raha hai Aapi!” Aqsa barabar mein hi kitaab pakde khadi thi.

“woh to mujhe bhi nazar aa raha hai magar yeh sab aur tum tum yahan kya kar rahi ho?”

“Faris sahab ne saza di hai.” Aise khush hokar boli jaise saza nahi koi inaam diya gaya ho.

“Aur yeh jo Adeel hai na, usay bhi hahaha.” Usne aaj se pehle Aqsa ko itna khush kabhi nahi dekha tha. Jannat na-kabhi ke aalam mein usay dekh kar reh gayi.

“Asal mein, main na wahan baith kar padh rahi thi. Faris sahab mere paas aaye. Bio ki book uthayi, sawaal poocha, mujhe jawab nahi aaya. Ab mujhe kya pata, mera surprise test lengay woh, warna main tayari kar ke baithi naa, Phir unhone mujhe woh baatein sunayi, woh baatein sunayi Allah ki kasam miss Bio mein bhi nahi dekha. Aur yeh jo Adeel hai Aapi! Yeh Faris sahab ke peeche khada hash raha tha. Maine dekha, Dil kiya kichhi maroorr doon uski. Allah ka lakh lakh shukar Faris sahab ne bhi dekh liya. Toh bas.…”

Uski muskurahat kano tak pahuch gayi.

“Toh bas kya?” Jannat ek dum mutashakkar hui.

“Pehle unhone kaha, ‘Why are you smiling?’ Phir unhone kaha, ‘Is this a joke to you?’” Aqsa Faris ki acting karti khushi ki inteha par thi.

“Kehte hain, ‘Sorry sir’ bada aaya ho, na ek dum se utar aayi. Magar Faris sahab ne sorry qabool nahi ki. Apne saath yahan le aaye. Halaanke yeh toh files de kar wapas jaa raha tha. Toh mujhe pata hai.” Awaaz mazeed sargoshi mein pheli.

“Faris sahab ne ise saza di hai. Isay oonchai se darr lagta hai. Itni der se dekh rahi hoon. Ek baar bhi neeche nahi dekha. (Phir se hashi) Upar wali deewar Adeel kar raha hai. Yeh wala hissa Faris sahab karenge. Aur yahan poonchne wali deewar shaam ko main paint karoongi. Faris sahab ne kaha hai.”

“AQSA!” Faris ki bhaari awaaz par forahi kisi fouji ki tarah active hui aur usi sur’at se nigahein kitaab par gaadh di.

Jannat ne sar utha kar ab ke Faris ko dekha. Uske chehre par itni tashweesh aur fikr thi ke woh paint brush haath mein liye ruk gaya. Aankho mein lamhe bhar ke liye ghair mafhoom sa tasur ubhra, phir woh brush rakhta seedhi utar kar neeche aaya. Kursi se paani ki bottle uthayi.

"Kya tum, tum theek ho?" Jannat ne paas aakar poocha. Aankhon se pareshani jhalak rahi thi.

Faris ne paani ki bottle se chand ghont lete hue dekha aur bola,

"Kya tumhe meri dimaagi haalat par suba (shak)ho raha hai?" Uske is tarah poochne par woh gadbadakar reh gayi.

"Nahi to… Maine aisa to nahi kaha."

"Socha to hai."

"Maine aisa socha bhi nahi. Phir hairaan kyun ho rahi ho?"

"Hairaan nahi hoon." Ruk gayi, nichla lab ka na. Kehna chahti thi, pareshani ho rahi hai magar. Sar utha kar use phir se dekha. Uska chehra spot aur aankhein be-tasur thi.

"Agar tum subah sawere uth kar wall paint karna shuru kar doge to main is baat ko nazaar kaise samajh sakti hoon?" Himmat jamaa kar keh diya.

"Aur woh jo tum subah soire uth kar library ki setting badalti thi, woh normal tha?" Jannat sadme se gung apni jagah khadi reh gayi.

"Usse kaise pata? Woh subah soire uth kar yeh kaam karti thi?" Ek nazar utha kar dekhne tak ki fursat nahi hoti thi mohsin ko aur routine ka to aise gyaan tha jaise uske aas paas saaye ki tarah rehta ho.

"Ek to yeh uske mulazim. Pakke jaasoos. Pal pal ki khabar dete rahe." Tap kar reh gayi.

Shadeed depression mein bas ek do baar hi library ka rukh kiya hoga, usne ghabra kar yaadash doodhai to pata chala woh subah shaam kisi bhi waqt kitaabon ki tarteeb badalne lag jati thi. Aur yeh kaam usne kai baar kiya tha.

"Magar sawal yeh tha ke usne yeh baat Faris ko kyun yaad diladi thi?"

"Woh to main, isliye karti thi kyunki aunty aisa karne ko kehti thi." Jhat se keh diya.

"Subah sawere. Shadeed thand mein? Mummy se puchhta hu!" Faris sach mein hairaan ho gaya.

Dobara se utarne laga to woh ek dum se ghabra kar aage aayi. Sidhi(ladder) ko pakadna is tarah tha ke woh neeche na utar sake lekin uska balance bigad gaya. Girte girte mushkil se bacha.

"What the hell?" Gript mazboot karte hue jhidak diya

"Apna kaam karo. Neeche kyun aa rahe ho? Paint karo. Balki saari deewaro ko paint karo. Tumhe kisne roka hai? Balki acchi baat hai, insaan ko apne ghar ka kaam khud karna chahiye.*"

Faris ne uske pentra badalne par jawabon ko kaanp kar rah gaya. Dhoop mein woh haath ka chhaja banaye, sar uthaye use dekh rahi thi. Chehra timtimaa raha tha. Shahd hathon ne jaise aag pakdi hui thi.

"Ek kaam tum bhi hamara kar do." Daant peesh kar jhuka.

"Haan, bolo." Apne asar par qaboo paati, woh bahut mustaid nazar aayi.

"Jis darwaze se bahar aayi ho, usi darwaze se andar chale jao. Bahut meherbani hogi."

Woh jo sach mein kisi kaam ki mutmain thi, sulag kar reh gayi.

Fikron mein ghar ka dard gusse se bhar gaya, Bhar bharati hui door shade ke paas ja baithi.

"Zara si pareshani dikhado to apne aap ko pata nahi kya samajh aane lagta hai. Ek to itni tension de rakhi hai mujhe. Raat bhar so nahi sakti. Aur isse dekho, paint ho raha hai."

Bur burate hue kahin aur dekhne lagi. Aur phir aadat se majboor, dobara dekhne lagi.

Woh Adeel Ahmed se baat karta apne kaam mein poori tarah focus aur mutmaeen lag raha tha. Kitne dino baad usne Faris ko is tarah dekha tha. Dil mein sukoon sa utarta mehsoos hua. Yun laga jaise seene par se ek bojh sirak gaya ho. Mobile par vibration hui to usne screen par nigah daudai. Ruby ki call thi. Uska nichla lab daanton tale aa gaya. Gala jaise kuch atak gaya ho. Sar utha kar ek nazar Faris par dali, phir call receive karti darakht ke neeche ja khadi hui.

Roller haath mein liye Faris ne mud kar use dekha. Woh baat kar rahi thi, toh chehre par fikarmandi ke aasaar numayan ho rahe the. Sar jhatak kar Faris phir se deewar par roller ghumane laga. Deewar ka rang poora safed ho chuka tha, lekin uske andar ki siyaahi thi jo khatam hone ka naam nahi le rahi thi.

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