Viggo walked outside the house. It was early morning. He could see Vincenzo was standing not far away. Vincenzo was standing next to one of trees and leaning to it. Viggo had been watching his older brother through the windows. Vincenzo hadn't slept that much and had gone outside mostly to clear his head. Vincenzo had been pacing the grounds. He was looking at his watch and balling his hands into fists.
As Viggo approached his brother, Vincenzo glanced in his direction giving him a look that was not hostile but was not welcoming either.
Viggo wordlessly approached his brother and stood in front of him. He stared into his eyes and didn't say a word. Neither looked away.
Viggo decided to speak first. He was the younger brother. He had to respect his brother's wishes to remain silent. He gave his brother a weak smile and said "I wanted to give you space but sometimes no amount of space can be enough. You know... Talking can resolve conflicts, not walking. So instead of walking in the cold why don't you come inside and we can talk."
Vincenzo looked whispered "There is no conflict here Viggo. I see nemesis. Only nemesis."
Viggo nodded "That's good. You are talking. Let's go inside. I don't want to talk to you in the freezing cold out here when there is a warm home right behind me. You love the cold. I know that. It gives you satisfaction. But ... it doesn't satisfy me to see you have separated yourself to a point you don't even want to come in and have breakfast with us."
Vincenzo said "It's too early for breakfast."
Viggo said "But you are not planning to join in. Are you? The business can wait Vincenzo. But family can't... You can't exclude yourself from this family. Just because you are taking the law into your own hands and ignore our family wishes you are still part of the family... There is conflict here Vincenzo. You thought I am referring to what's happening at our grandpa's lair. I wasn't. I am talking about our family and how we must keep together. The Irish are working hard at it to keep a strong front. They even have a convention while we are fighting amongst ourselves. You could have built bridges like how father does. It's not too late. I have no doubt you can. You are capable of anything because father taught you everything you know... So I know that you can handle anything yet you are losing sleep here. Do you want to tell me why you are standing here or am I supposed to guess. You can't be worried about what happens outside this house. You know you can handle anything. So say it. What's bothering you?"
Vincenzo said with a dismissive tone "You. You are bothering me."
Viggo gave him a serious look "You don't like it when someone reaches out to you. Clarissa offered you to go to her house and stay. You could go. But you refused. She was trying to help you. You could bring her here instead..."
Vincenzo said "That's not right. I want to take actions the right way... Her father won't approve..."
Viggo said "Of course. But let's be honest ... You didn't do this for her father. You did it for yourself. It's killing you. Isn't it? It's killing you what you have done. You feel guilt. You don't think you deserve a family or comfort from your girl. You feel responsible..."
Vincenzo said "I am responsible..."
Viggo said "You are... You have turned your back on our father..."
Vincenzo took a step towards Viggo and said harshly " I have not."
Viggo could see his brother's chest rising and falling now. His brother was offended. "You are taking this the wrong way. I know you did what you did not to defy father but you thought this was the way to do it. In the process you put our father in front of his father and you have to face our father to save our grandfather who put you in a position against our father."
Vincenzo said "You don't know anything." As he said this he watched his brother's face turn sad.
Viggo admitted "I know. You are full of secrets and experiences I have no knowledge of. But I am still your brother. Father loves you even when you betray him..."
Vincenzo said in a low tone "I have not betrayed our father. In fact, I have spent years fighting to put myself in a position to protect our father ... You have no idea what you are talking about."
Viggo said "I know I don't know anything. It's because you haven't told me. Talk to me Vincenzo. What is going on? But like I said at the beginning... no matter what happens out there I know you can handle it. I know it will be alright. What I care for is this family. We have family values. Don't you see what this family stands for. We are standing here because of the sacrifices of our father and our mother. They are the reason we can chase our American dreams that they couldn't because they were sacrificing so much for us. We have a home because of their sacrifices. So don't tell me business at the lair is what's occupying your mind. It shouldn't. What you should think of is not separating yourself by standing out here. It hurts to see you distant. Our parents have sacrificed so much so we can sit together every morning in peace when no one is fighting and getting hurt. They live to make our lives better... What have you sacrificed to rival their sacrifice? What do you live for?"
Vincenzo said to himself "I sacrificed my innocence, my childhood. I saw what I didn't want to see. I heard what I didn't want to hear. I was forced to know what I didn't want to know. My choices were taken away from me... Now I live to protect our father..." He remained silent looking into his brother's eyes.
Viggo wanted to continue but he stopped. Something in his brother's eyes told him to stop. He wasn't sure what it was. He had a feeling he had over stepped the mark and had hurt his brother. He could sense he just hurt him. He said automatically "I am sorry." He didn't even know what he was saying sorry for. It felt strange.
Vincenzo thought to himself "I am sorry too... for what's happening and what's about to happen..." He said "Go inside. I will come back in after some time out here..."
Viggo said "What is it you are hiding? You feel guilt you defied our father? Is that it? Is that why you want to be alone and didn't take Clarissa on her offer. You are angry with yourself? Defying our father is killing you?"
Vincenzo said to himself "I have been defying him for years ... and not by choice..." He said "Why don't you go check on your girl? I could hear her crying through the basement door. Business can wait but family can't." He gave his brother an expecting look.
Viggo shook at his words. His brother referred to Angelia as family. She wasn't technically and didn't even have meals with them. She was still staying separately... but to hear his brother call her family did hit him hard. Vincenzo was committed to family enough to put his hate away for her. He was alarmed to hear she cried again. He was used to it but she was getting better. Viggo didn't say anything and made his way to Angelia's residence in the basement of the guest building just behind Vincenzo. He felt strange. He could not stop thinking about the irony. His brother had secrets inside. He had a lot of untold secrets. And he had asked him to go tend to Angelia. Angelia had a lot of untold secrets inside her. Ones that she knew that shaped her pain... Maybe his brother was telling him something... That he also had so much inside he couldn't tell him yet. He hoped his brother didn't keep him waiting long. It was one of those days. If his brother didn't want to tell him his secrets nothing could persuade him unless he chose to share.
Viggo slowly entered through the door and saw Angelia awake sitting on a sofa with a blanket wrapped around her. Her eyes were puffy but gorgeous as usual.
She gasped "Hi..." She didn't expect to see him.
Viggo said "Bad dreams again?" He walked to sit next to her on the sofa and held her in his arms.
Angelia shook her head "I had another nightmare. I wish they stop. I don't want to feel ill. I don't want to see nightmares. I am tired of being in bed. I want to be strong Viggo. I really do..."
Viggo said "You are stronger than many women I know and many men. Angelia, you are still fighting hard. It takes time. Just try to keep living and keep hoping. You want a short cut to recovery. It won't work. I am always here waiting for you. I will be here holding your hand until you get better..."
Angelia said "I am sorry I am so weak. I don't want to be like this. I want to be ok."
Viggo said "You are not weak. You are weakened by all that's happened. You will get better. I promise. Just don't give up. What was your nightmare about this time? Do you want to tell me?"
Angelia looked away "It was so horrible. Their faces are haunting me. Why? Why can't it stop? I don't want to see nightmares. I just want it to stop. I didn't hurt anyone. Why do I suffer? Why do I feel so sick? It's so horrible I don't want to explain what it was I saw..." She then wiped her tears "I am tired of crying. I wish I could run out of tears so I don't cry again and you don't have to see my tears..." She then broke down and sobbed.
Viggo said "Shhh..It's ok. Cry. It's ok to let it out. Don't hold it in... You are all alone Angelia. It hurts more when you are all alone. You have me but you don't even want to tell me what was in your nightmare. We maybe even surrounded by people but if we can't tell them what's bothering us it hurts so much more. You have me. You can tell me anything but you don't want to tell me because you think it hurts me... You are sacrificing yourself and your health so those who love you are protected. But you don't have to protect me. Tell me what's wrong. Tell me about your pain."
Angelia said "I don't want to. Viggo. It's my pain... Not yours..."
Viggo said "It's not technically your pain if someone else caused it. You didn't cause anyone pain and hurt. It's not your fault. You see nightmares because of your scars and wounds. When someone gets shot, they get bandages. Everyone sees the bandages and where the wound is. So they nurture the injured person and keep the pressure off the location where the wound is. They know what to give to the casualty to eat and drink to get better to help them regain their strength. But in your case... there is no visible wound. It's a wound that is hurting you but no one sees... I can't see your wound and I can't help you except by holding your hand while you go through this tough recovery time. If you had a dislocated shoulder or broken arm you knew how long you had to wait for the wound to heal. But you can't know because your wound is not an ordinary one. You are hurt and I am sorry. Just know I a knowledge your pain. I know you are suffering. I am always here. I wait. So please don't be too hard on yourself. You are braver than many people I know. And please listen to me carefully... Don't question why it happened. Ask yourself why I hate myself so much when I did nothing wrong. You are hurting because someone else hurt you and caused you pain. Ask yourself why do I feel guilt when I did nothing wrong to anyone? Stop blaming yourself for the pain caused by others to you. You are hurting because every would needs recovery time. The physical ones may take days or months or years and at times wounds don't heal at all. Did I ever tell you about my uncle Alec?"
Angelia said "I remember his name? You said you went to visit him days ago..."
Viggo said "He is my mother's cousin. You know my mother has no cousins except uncle Alec. My mother's cousins died in the World War II. My grandpa was the youngest so his children, my mother and uncle Angelo were much younger. Other cousins were at the age to go to war and they didn't return except for uncle Alec."
Angelia gasped "I am so sorry...."
Viggo said "I am sorry too. I never get to know them... Uncle Alec is the only one who has survived. I didn't want to tell you about my mother's cousins because I thought it upset you... But I guess now that you are abit better I can tell you... My uncle wanted to die for his country. He says there is no honour bigger than to serve your country. As much as how he wanted to die in the battlefield he is living and he tries to do what he can to help others have a good life that he fought hard in the war to preserve for us all. I might take you to see him. He needs help arranging a trip to ... Normandy for the veterans. It's a lot of paper work and he knew I am good good with paper work. It will be in next November. But it takes time to arrange a reunion. He is quite upbeat about life. I think it's good if you go to see him."
Angelia asked "Does he know your father is a criminal?"
Viggo shook his head "No. But even if he did he doesn't judge. He is like my mother. Very religious. He prays for the souls of those who are going to the wrong path. Well my father was not gently asked to become a criminal you know. He was born into this family. He never had a choice. One day our family will not be criminals. One day we can slowly break the bonds that has tied us to the cut throat underworld. Until that day we have to live as we are. We all come from somewhere. My uncle works with people who have post traumatic disorder. It's not just veterans. It's everyone. He is always working and has no time for family catch up but always sends us presents and cards when it's festive time or it's time for our birthday. When I went to visit him I asked him was he ever scared in his life ... he said he was and at times he was hurt. At times he felt alone ... But he always told himself to never to surrender. Because once we surrender then ... the entity we are fighting can take the only thing we have that's worth fighting for... our free will and our freedom. Lead your life he said. Don't let it be ruled by your pain. Live with the pain but don't let it rule your life. You rule your life and not your pain. My uncle Alec has a lot of pain but he lives because he believes life is worth living and fighting for. Life is a battle Angelia. You can get better. Let me help you."
Angelia was moved by his words and moved closer. She planted a kiss on his cheek "You already are..." She then attached her lips to his giving him a deep kiss for the first time in a long time.
Outside Vincenzo was standing in the cold watching the skies. The stars had gone now and he could see some clouds approaching.