Avery's POV
There was a soft knock at the door and soon Dawson was poking his head through the door frame.
I saw that there was a small container in his hand which was tucked ever so slightly behind his back.
"Hey.." he said quietly as he almost cautiously walked into the room.
"Hey." I say back shaking my head slightly at what ever he was doing.
He was still being too careful and I didn't like it one fucking bit.
He didn't move inside the room any further until I pointed it out. "You gonna come in or just stand there forever...?"
His face looked surprised but he rushed in and shut the door behind him nonetheless.
"Right." He laughs and shakes his head as if realizing how stupid he was being, which was at an all time high right now. Sorry.
I just nod awkwardly. "It's okay. Did you uh need something or..?"
Oh my god I was doing it too now. Someone murder me.
"Oh yeah." He pulls out the container from behind him with a wide and child like grin on his face. "I brought cookies. They're peanut butter. Mona said you really liked peanut butter cookies so I made some." Suddenly he gets an anxious look on his face.
"Not that I made them cause they're your favorite or anything but they just sounded good and I figured I'd bring you some since you like them so much or whatever. But don't think I-"
"Dawson." I say cutting off his cute rant. "Thank you for the cookies. Now sit and stop being anxious. I'm good, okay?"
I patted the spot on the bed next to me and scoot over to make more room. "Here, come sit. We can eat cookies and watch HGTV together."
"You make it sound like we're a married couple in their 30's or some shit."
I laugh along at the idea of that. It was quite an absurd and crazy thought to think. Being married to Dawson and all. Being 30 also sounded like a million years away even though I knew it wasn't.
"Eat a damn cookie, King." Although my words were ever so slightly rude the smile on my face told him otherwise.
Maybe I wasn't as good at concealing my emotions as I thought...
Maybe I didn't want to conceal them though.
Nope that was a terrible idea and I like option one better.
Dawson tumbles onto the bed next to me and hugs a small throw pillow to his chest.
He was literally the epitome of cuteness right now, or always, whatever.
I lean uncomfortably in the corner of my bed against the walls and shift my shoulder around in an attempt to fix the aching within every part of my body.
I hear a sigh next to me and look to see Dawson patting the pillow he was holding against him.
He motions with his hand for me to lie down on it but I look away and act as if I didn't understand the quite obvious gesture.
But of course Dawson being Dawson he knew right away and felt the need to point it out.
"You're not stupid Avery. I know you know what I meant. Lay."
His tone was demanding and for some reason I felt like I had to listen.
I don't make any noise as I scoot over and lean my head against the pillow and lay my body comfortably on the bed and tangle myself within the fluffy scattered blankets.
"See? Was that so hard?" He taps my head with his finger lightly and I close my eyes tightly and scrunch my face at the impact.
"Shut the fuck up." I mumble quietly.
He just laughs and moves his arm to rest one around my stomach and other around the top of the pillow.
I could feel my heart begin to beat faster for some reason.
But I ignored the pounding in my chest and head and tried to focus on the fact that Dawson and I were possibly back to normal for good.
He wasn't acting all cautious or awkward about the other night anymore.
I didn't understand why he did in the first place though.
Out of everyone here, Dawson was the one person I thought would always treat me the same no matter what. And maybe that was true and he just didn't know how to handle this.
I guess some cookies, joking banter, and late night house renovation shows could fix all of that.
"So..." he says after sitting in silence as we munched on the cookies and ridiculed the home choices.
"So." I repeat.
"I know you don't wanna talk about the other night and I'm mostly a total idiot for bringing it up but I'm curious. And I need to see if you're really okay. Or need to talk about anything? So uh what was up..?"
He was nervous. Extremely nervous. And he didn't bother hiding it.
"You're correct. You are an idiot and no, I don't wanna talk."
He opens his mouth, to either beg me to or tell me he respects my choice, I didn't know because i cut him off.
"BUT I will give you a basic overview if you promise to never bring this up again and forget my total and utter humiliation of showing emotions that I totally don't have?"
He nods, almost excitedly. "I wouldn't keep bothering you about it if you really don't want me to. You don't have to tell me. I just wanna know more about you, and I've found that it's really fucking hard to do that."
I was still laying on his chest so thankfully I didn't have to look at him throughout that little monologue or what I was about to do.
"There's not much to know." I admit. "But that girl at the party..." I clear my throat as her name in my thoughts just makes me wanna vomit. "Lilliana..well uh we were friends back in freshman year. Before I met Mona. Guess we got along pretty well and had a lot of common interests. But that doesn't mean anything when the other person is just a fake bitch."
I think he noticed talking about this made me an awful mix of angry and sad so for some reason he thought playing with my hair would calm me down. And usually it would. Cause who the fuck doesn't like people playing with their hair? Psychopaths, that's who. I guess I was a psychopath though because Dawson playing with my hair only made me more anxious than I originally was.
I guess he noticed I paused too long because he looks down at me and smiles encouragingly.
"Well uh she fucked me over. Gave me bad advice. Forced me into things I wasn't comfortable with and just never had my best interest at heart like I did with hers. I just cared about her a hell of a lot more than she cared about me and that kinda sucks..." I shrug and act like what she did didn't hurt me. Because it did. But I was over it. I was angry, but I wasn't sad. Because I found such better things after she left. Like Mona. Like everyone I'm living with. Like Dawson.
"It's her loss."
I looked up to him, giving up on avoiding eye contact at all costs. I was curious as to what he would say or what he was thinking.
He looked mad but smiled at me when he saw I looked to him.
"She lost someone who actually cared about her. I don't know why she would ever make the mistake of doing that. Because it's hard to find. You're like a diamond in the shitty pieces of coal at this school."
"You did not just compare me to a diamond." I say laughing but smiling at the comparison.
"Am I wrong?" He smirks down at me teasingly.
"I am great, aren't I?" I say playfully to him. Narcissistic humor was always fun. And the only time I could acceptably boost my ego.
"The best." He tells me smiling gently.
***