We were two hours late. Nobody blamed Jesse. Everybody blamed me. My brother, Jason, was annoyed that his best friend wasn't there when he proposed. I knew his annoyance was pointed directly at me, but I didn't care. I could have stayed at home. If Jesse hadn't insisted and practically blackmailed me into coming, they wouldn't have caught a strand of my hair here. Like always, nobody listened to me. No one was ready to accept that it was Jesse's fault. It was easier to blame someone who constantly gives everyone a hard time.
My mother, on the other hand, was happy to see me. I couldn't find it in me to be pissed at her even though I had every right to be. My mum, despite everything that I do, loved me. She was the only one who never got pissed at me, but she would always wear a disappointed look every time something happened. She had the ability to make you feel like a complete shit when she's disappointed, which was why I tried to stay clear of her this night, but so far, she was more glad to see me than disappointed.
We sat on the patio on the rooftop with the view of the city. Champagne glasses were clinking, murmurs and happy laughter was going around, and the food was arranged perfectly on the table covered with a white linen. Jason and Kelly were holding hands, gushing over each other. My brother and his fiancée loved each other, and I could attest to that. They have been together for four years, and they were finally going to get married. Despite how I felt about Jason and Jesse, I liked Kelly. She was cool. She was the only person who didn't complain about my tardiness. She was just glad that I came. That was who she was; always happy, and always giving excuses for other people, never seeing the bad side of them.
I guess that is why I don't hang around her that much.
There were eight people on the table. Jesse, unfortunately, found himself sitting beside me. Being close to him was something that I didn't want to find myself in, but I had no control over things. It was like the more I tried to stay away from him, the closer he seemed to get. His close proximity made me tense, and it made me sit at the edge of my seat to stop myself from feeling his warmth and smelling his cologne.
"How is the shop doing, Iris?"
I didn't realize the question was thrown at me until I took too long to answer and had everyone gaping. Jason glared at me for ignoring his future father-in-law, but I didn't have the energy to defend myself.
Wiping my mouth with a napkin, I smiled awkwardly and nodded at Jeremy, my brother's father-in-law. "It's doing well," I answered, leaving it at that.
"I think you should be hired for the wedding."
"Absolutely not," Jason cut in with a nervous and panicked laugh.With only a year difference, he and I should have been closer. We were once until I realized that he could not pick me over his best friend. I may have never given him reasons to, but I thought he would still be loyal to family. My brother slide me a look with his sharp green eyes like mine before darting his gaze back to Kelly's dad. "I think we should hire professionals. Besides, I think Kelly already has someone in mind."
"Oh, I could never turn down Iris," Kelly said with a glance, her perfect face spreading into a gorgeous smile that revealed a perfect set of white teeth. "I think it's a great idea," she murmured, sounding and looking like it. "Would that be okay for you, Iris? Would you be my florist?"
Everyone stared at me. My mother nodded her head in encouragement. I could see the eyes that approved and the eyes that didn't approve. Only one stood out. Jason was not on board with the idea, and honestly, I wasn't either. If not for Kelly, I wouldn't even be here. I still stood by my words when I said she was too good for my brother. Too kind and pure. Beautiful. She stood out among crowds. I didn't understand how she chose my brother. Don't get me wrong, my brother was attractive with his sharp features and dark, slicked hair, but not to the point that I would want him to date someone like Kelly. He was Jesse's friend. They shared the same brain and personality.
I took a deep breath and parted my lips to decline because no matter how much I felt about her, I was not going to accept that responsibility. However, Jason beat me to it.
"Kelly.." he put his hand over hers and forcefully grinned. "It's our wedding, your dream wedding. I think we should hire professionals-"
"You don't think I qualify as a professional?" I cut him off before he could finish. Beside me, Jesse straightened and put down the napkin as if he expected a fight to break out.
Jason blinked at the question. "Well, I think..." he stumbled on his words, trying to choose the nicest words to say with a sigh. "Yes, Iris. You're a florist, but you're not exactly worthy of a wedding contract. Your customers buy your flowers for birthdays, anniversaries, funerals-but when it's the matter of a wedding, an important day for couples, I don't think anyone would hire you for that. No offense, sis, but you still have a long way to go."
The table went quiet after he said that.
"Jason," Kelly hissed, wearing a look of disapproval. She looked back at me apologetically, but it was not her place to apologize to me.
"What?" he retorted, looking back at his fiancee as if he had not done something wrong. "It's our wedding. I want to give you the best wedding. We can't afford to mess it up."
My mother rubbed her forehead with her eyes cast down as if a headache had came over her. Dad busied himself picking at his food, probably regretting staying for dinner. Jason's in-laws looked uncomfortable. The rest on the table were trying to busy themselves to lessen the tension that had built up by my brother's words.
My hands shook underneath the table, but I kept myself composed. I sipped my drink with tight lips.
Kelly's mum, Anna, made a gesture to her husband. Jeremy started to say, "I'm sorry for bringing this-"
"Jason, apologize to Iris," dad interrupted. "That was a really mean thing to say to your sister."
"What, I'm just being honest. And everyone knows that her shop isn't doing well. Isn't it time we let her face what's happening? If Iris doesn't think of another option, she's going to end up living with you. I'm sorry, dad, but someone has to tell her."
"It's not your place," mum stated, and I could hear the tinge of anger in her voice.
Jason made a sound of disbelief. "Are you kidding? Would you rather watch her throw away the rest of her life being hung up on something that has failed?" He glanced at me. "Iris, everyone supported you when you decided to chase your dreams, but that dream has failed now. It's time to think about your future and what you want to do. I don't want you to end up like a loser."
I slammed the empty glass on the table and pushed my chair back violently, startling everyone. My chest hurt. I felt something squeezing there. A flash of anger burst in me. White. Hot. Seething. My face closed off immediately. I think they all expected me to start lashing out and screaming, but I did neither. Instead, I grabbed a bottle of champagne from the table and looked at Kelly.
"Congratulations." With that, I turned around and left.
I think I was choking or trying not to choke. Either way, I didn't think I was breathing properly. I rushed out through the doors, my chest constricting with each breath. The air hits my face, but I found it suffocating. My heart burned so much I wanted to thrust my hand into my chest and pull it out.
"Hey, hey." Jesse put his hands on my shoulders and pulled me back before I could walk down the street. I didn't forget that he gave me a ride, but I honestly didn't need to be in anyone's presence now.
Anger sliced through my chest. "Leave me the hell alone." I tried to push him away, but he was firm and strong he doesn't budge. It was irritating.
"No, I won't leave you alone. Do you know why? Because I don't listen to you." He opened the door to his car and shoved me in that direction.
I glared at him. "You're a real asshole."
"Yeah, well, the world ain't nice, sweetheart." He tapped the door with his fingers. "Get in."
"No. I want to walk."
He growled, "I'm not going to let you walk home by yourself, Iris. It's after ten. Either you go back inside and spend the night, or you get inside my car."
I stared at him. He really meant business. He was glaring at me with the eyes that saw through everything I wanted to hide. Eyes that had judged me, eyes that had looked at me as if there was no world between us. The eyes that made me feel beautiful and perfect.
No.
"There's no way in hell I'm going back inside," I told him with gritted teeth. "I think I'd murder him if I go back in there." I glanced behind my shoulder, feeling every bit of anger inside me. I couldn't believe Jason would say that about me. I didn't expect him to be cruel. There were some things even I wouldn't say to him.
Jesse grinned at my words and jerked his chin to the car, still holding the passenger's door for me. "Good, then get in."
"You know I hate you, right?"
"Yeah, you say that everyday. It's starting to lose its meaning."
I didn't take a step, though. He saw my hesitation. In a flash, he grabbed me and I was seated into the passenger's seat. Jesse grabbed the seatbelt over and pulled it around me. He was so close I could feel his heat and scent. It's perfect and delirious. His cheek brushed against my face when he moved to click in the seatbelt in place. My breath hitched. I held it in as his arm rubbed against my front. When he tried to pull back, he caught me staring and paused his movements.
His face was dangerously close to me.
Our breaths mingled with one another.
His eyes stared deep into mine and I swear I could feel his heart speeding up. My lips parted and his followed unconsciously. His mint breath brushed my face and I gripped my seatbelt.
Somewhere around, a car honked, breaking our connection. Jesse pulled away from me and the door shut. He was already going around the front before I could tell my heart to quiet down. My hands trembled and I quickly fisted them, licking my lips.
What the fuck just happened?
I didn't get to answer the question before he was inside, hitting the engine on and shoving off into traffic. After some time, my heart quieted down and my hands stopped trembling. Jesse and I settled into a comfortable silence.
Until he broke that peace.
"Your brother's a dick."
"Shut up."
"But he's kinda right, even though the words he chose were not suitable."
I swung my head around so fast. "Are you fucking kidding me? You think he's right?" I was so speechless I could hardly say anything else besides that.
"It doesn't mean that I want you to quit," he tried to justify with a one shoulder shrug, one hand gripping the wheel. "The shop has not been doing well, Iris, face it. But I would not want you to close it and shut down your dreams. You need to find ways to boost your sales, or you might actually find yourself out of a job."
"Did you give me a ride just so you could be a complete asshole?" My eyes were dark with anger and my tongue tasted bitter. I could hide it from him, but I couldn't hide it to myself. It fucking hurt.
He gave a half-laugh, half in surprise and half in amusement, grabbing the back of his neck. "Most times, but not tonight," he responded, looking back at me as his lips lifted in a crooked grin. "Tonight, I want to make sure you don't end up dead somewhere in a ditch or vanish completely."
I didn't appreciate that. He could not be a dick one second and act like he cared about me after. "Oh, thank you so much for helping me. I appreciate your concern."
"Just trying to look out for you."
I looked back up. There was a yearning in his eyes that had me swallowing over a knot. "Well, don't," I snapped. "Because I'm sick and tired of you and Jason looking down on me." My throat burned. I let out a breath and tugged at my collar to breathe properly.
He tilted his head to the side, his eyes narrowing in disbelief. "Woah, I don't look down on you. What gave you that idea?"
My eyes went to him. "You don't? Then, what's the bullshit about my shop not doing well? You've always looked down on me and the path I chose. What, because you have such a good business that you decided mine isn't worth it and I should give up?
"I never said you should give up." His mouth flattened. "I said you need to find a way to save something you're passionate about. I wouldn't want your dreams crushed."
"I don't care what you or Jason think, Jesse. Say whatever you want about my business, but I'm not going to listen to either one of you. I have never concerned myself with your business, so you should stay away from mine. Don't act like you care about my life because you have only contributed to the bad things. You have only ever cared about ruining my day, so this sudden act of care towards me? I'm not going to buy into that bullshit."
He sighed as if he was tired of me, but he was smart enough to keep his mouth shut. I knew I was not some genius business woman, that I didn't have a successful business like him or a nice job like my brother, but I had something I owned, at least. Something that I put all my hard work into and made it into a real thing. Some people didn't get that opportunity. Not everyone make their dreams a reality.
For the last eight months, sales had been going down. I refused to acknowledge how bad it was, and despite knowing my business was struggling, I still held onto the hope that it would survive. No matter what, I planned to keep the shop open. It was my dream, and I didn't want to have regrets.
Jesse pulled over my apartment building and unlocked the door. His head was turned halfway to me, his jaw clenching over and over again. I walked out of the car before he could say anything to me, knowing we both wanted to get rid of each other. He let me go without any fight, without a word, and I was content with it. I didn't even turn around to see if he had gone. I didn't get to peek through my window to check if his car was still there or if he had drove off. The urge was there, but it didn't overpower my feelings.
When I emptied my bag that same night, I found a little green note inside. I wasn't surprised, but I was mostly surprised on how he was able to slip the note into my bag without me knowing. It was as if he had perfected the act of being sneaky. Or perhaps I had just been too distracted by my feelings and the thoughts going through my head to notice the moment he had slipped the note inside.
I held the note to my face.
I hate how you make me feel.
-
I hate how you make me feel.
What the hell was that supposed to mean?
Morning came sooner than I expected, and I had been going back to Jesse's note, trying to decrypt his words. It pissed me off how uneasy it made me feel. How it made my heart jolt each time I read a word, each time the full sentence rotated inside my head and made me feel dizzy from how many times I have read it. In the end, I finally understood what he meant, which shouldn't have taken so me long to.
I hate how you make me feel. It was easy. I should have understood the second I read the note. For over half of his life, Jesse had done nothing but hated me. Every thing he did to me came from hate. Every nerve he had touched. Of course, he would hate me for making him hate me. Hate was a feeling that was repulsive and made people itch. It made people sad and it made them feel agitated. For a man like Jesse Price, whom people thought was a ray of sunshine, hating me dimmed his light. Hating me puts a stress on him. Hating me was an addiction, a necessity.
Hating me was his sin.
Like all the notes I had gotten over the years, I didn't squeeze this one and throw it in the trash even though I wanted to. Instead, I pulled my top drawer, filled with hundreds of other green notes that came from him. Cece once asked me why I never threw them out. I didn't have the answers to that. It was something I was finding hard to let go of. Maybe it was because I was attached to them. Maybe it was a reminder of all the awful things he had said-of how much I hated him so I wouldn't forget and betray my younger self. The one who had endured a lot in the hands of Jesse. The one scarred and heart broken. The one who managed to grow up, unable to forget. Older me didn't need to forget. Older me held on like a trap in a fish hook, hooked to the memories and to the pain. These notes helped remind me who he truly was, and who I needed to be.
My stomach should have turned when I saw the sight of my shop, but I couldn't. I loved it too much. This was my dream, but being forced to realize that the dream could shatter any moment hurts me to my core. I checked the sales report on the computer, and with each scrutiny came a slice of a knife to my chest. Sales had gone incredibly down. The jump was crazy, and I had ignored it. Maybe if I hadn't, would things have gone this bad?
I rubbed my forehead and continued to scale through the report. Rent was going to be due soon. I checked my bank balance, which got my mouth tasting bitter and my heart jumping through my throat. I wouldn't be able to pay rent in three months. That is, if I wanted to eat and continue paying bills. I couldn't do it. There was no way the shop would be open for another month.
My heart sank. I hadn't realized-no, I had not prepared for this moment. I thought if I ignored it and hoped, something would happen. A fucking miracle would happen where I don't have to close down my shop. If I don't find a way to keep the sales up, I would have to make the biggest decision of my life. I couldn't ask my parents for help. No, I could never take their money even though they would offer it to me with no hesitation.
Were people right when they told me I had picked the wrong location? Or when Jesse advised me to hire an employee who would work on marketing and stuff? I hadn't listened to him because I didn't want any suggestions from him.
Maybe I should have. Maybe I should have listened. Then, I wouldn't be in this problem.
Fuck.
The shop door opened and the bell chimed. I looked up and it was my mother. She hesitated by the door before getting the courage to walk inside. Her steps were light and tensed, but she still put on a brave smile.
"If you're here to talk about last night, mum, I don't want to," I said, as I quickly exited out of the reports sheet.
My mother, even at the age of fifty-one was younger than she looked. Sometimes, I stared at her and wondered why I was the one who looked older each day. She was a tall and beautiful, raven haired woman with sharp features that glared. When she was young, she used to be a model, but after marrying dad and having Jason, she quit. However, she still worked in the modeling industry.
Mum approached the counter. "No, I came to see you, sweetie," she replied, looking around the shop. She was acting like she had never seen it before.
Why was she nervous?
Looking back at me, she played with her fingers nervously. "Well, of course, I also came to apologize. I wanted to call you last night, but I knew it wouldn't have been a great time." She leaned her front against the counter and placed her bag on it.
I pinched the bridge of my nose. "It's over, done with. I promise you what Jason said isn't getting in my head, so you didn't have to come here and apologize." Liar.
"You're good, then?"
I nodded. "I'm great." My mum and I had a weird relationship. I didn't know when it started or how it started, but she was always cautious and nervous around me, as if she was afraid that if she said something wrong, I would disappear from her life.
The thought made my breath hitched for a second. I had never stopped to consider my relationship with her. Staring at her now, really staring at her, it made me wonder when our relationship turned out like this. She used to be comfortable around me and shared things with me. Now she was jumpy and nervous. Did I do this? Did I really let Jesse come between my mother and I? Was I too wrapped up in my shit to realize my actions affected everyone around me?
"Hey, mum-" I started to say, and she looked up at me eagerly. I rubbed the back of my neck. "I haven't had breakfast yet and the cafe across is open. If you haven't had something to eat, we could...uh...grab something together. If you're not in a hurry or anything."
Her eyes sparkled at my request. "I would love that, Iris." She looked happy. Excited. Hope bloomed in her blue eyes. I must have really kicked her down countless times to make her excited and happy over a breakfast invite. Either way, it also brought a smile to my face.
"Great. Let me just-"
The door bell chimed.
Two women walked in. Maybe the universe was finally shinning down on me.
"Hello, what can I do for you?" I smiled politely like I do with every customer.
The woman to my right rested her arm on the counter and glanced around the shop. "Hi, I'm not sure what flowers to buy, but you're the expert. It's for my husband. He got promoted."
"And I need something for my daughter's graduation," the other woman said. "What would you recommend?"
Graduation? In February?
Before I could respond, a group of women strode in. It confused me because this had never happened before. Two customers could walk in at the same time, but six customers under four minutes? I would have found this less suspicious if I didn't know my shop's strength. Flyers did not even work that well.
I was still reeling over the new customers, but maintained a smile and listened to their choices of flowers. It was the woman at the back that caught my eye. It was not the gorgeous fur coat she was wearing that hinted at something. No, it was the secret thumbs up she gave my mum.
I paused, taking all the customers in before an unsettling feeling crept into my stomach. It clogged my throat and made it hard to breathe. I sharply glanced at my mother. "Mum, can I see you for a sec?" To the customers I said, "Could you please excuse us? Thank you."
Mum followed me into the break room. My hands trembled when I shut the door, spinning around to face her.
"What the hell do you think you're doing, mum? I never said I wanted pity customers! Why would you embarrass me like that?" Fresh tears gathered in my eyes, but none fell down my cheeks.
She winced and took a step toward me. "Iris, I was only trying to help. I know what Jason said could have affected you, and I wanted to make you happy." She tried to touch me, but I flinched and pulled away.
"By sending in fake customers?" My voice grated harshly. I was in a state of disbelief.
"They're not fake. They are going to buy the flowers."
"So they can dump it in the trash because they have no use for it?" I crossed my arms, shaking. "Did you pay them?"
"No!" Mum looked horrified by my words. "I would never do that to you."
"But you did!" My voice rose as my arms flailed at my sides. "What made you think this would make me happy? Mum, do you have any idea how humiliating this is? To have your own mother send her friends to her daughter's shop to pity buy flowers from her? So they can go behind my back and have a laugh?" Did she not see where I was getting at?
She winced, taking another step forward. "Iris, I'm sorry."
"Just go, mum." I turned away from her and held the bridge of my nose, squeezing my eyes shut. "And take your friends with you. I'm not selling anything."
"Iris..."
"Please!" My voice shook with thunder. Sheer rage brought my hands clenched at my sides. There was a pounding in my head that made me careless of my harsh tone, but I couldn't think about her feelings now. "You have gone half of my life letting me handle things alone and worrying about Jason and Jesse. Trust me when I say I can handle my business alone and do what you have always done. Go, please," I added softly. "I don't want to talk to you right now."
I didn't turn around again until I could no longer hear her heavy footsteps. I crouched down and gripped my head, letting out a soundless scream of frustration and anger. Lying flat on my back, I let out small breaths through my nose.
Mum did something out of pity for me, something embarrassing and humiliating, and I still couldn't see the good side of it. Sure, she didn't aim to hurt, but it made me realized something. That I was a failure. That my own mother didn't believe in me, and if she didn't, then no one else would. If mum didn't trust that I could save my shop, then how was I able to save it now?
"Uh, everything okay in here?"
I rolled to my side to find Viv, Jesse's assistant standing by the door, staring at me with concern through her blue eyes, her caramel coat draped around her shoulders, and her long legs wrapped around her fishnet stockings.
I sighed, happy to see her. "Is that for me?" I questioned, gesturing to the coffee in her hand.
She nodded amusingly and strode into the room. I struggled to my feet and brushed my hair back, accepting the cup she handed to me while she clutched hers. Viv's bushy brows rose with questions, her violet hair the thing that stood out the most about her.
"Oh, don't worry about me. I'm just the crazy florist." I waved her off, plopping down on the couch. I took a sip of the coffee, which was hot and literally almost burned my tongue. That was how I liked it. Jesse had always said I was like a walking flaming fire.
Now, why the fuck did I think about that?
"The door was open and you are here. Aren't you worried someone could come in and steal from the cash register?"
I snorted and chuckled, tasting the bitterness on my tongue. "What are they going to find? An empty cash register?"
Here was something about me and Viv that you may or may not have figured out. Even though I hated Jesse, I never let that come between our friendship. Viv and I didn't exactly started out as friends, but we came to bond over our mutual hatred for a man. I let her rant to me about her douchebag ex, and in return, she listened to me rant about her boss. If Jesse knew about our little therapy session, he didn't say anything about it.
I glanced at her, watching the way her cheeks dipped as she refrained from laughing. "Seriously," I stated, dragging out a breath. "I'm about this close to losing my mind." I lifted my hand, pinching my thumb and index fingers just a fraction wide.
She didn't hold back a laugh. "Aren't you always out of your mind?"
"Good point."
Viv touched my shoulder. "So, what's the matter?" I told her what mum did and watched her gasp, then laughed again. "No way. I saw a bunch of women coming out of your shop and I thought you got lucky today. Shit, Iris, that must have pissed you off."
"Why do you think you came in and saw me lying on the ground?"
"I mean, she was only trying to help even though I understand where you're coming from. If my mother does that to me, I would go off my rocker."
I snorted and straightened on the couch. "Might as well just accept reality. Face it..." I waved my arms and let it fall. "I'm never going to keep the shop open. I might as well have signed my death certificate."
"Don't say that."
"But it's true." I shifted around and tucked one leg under me. "This..." I waved around the break room, at the shop. "is a complete disaster, Viv. This is proof that dreams can be crushed no matter how hard you try to save it."
"You're not trying hard," she replied. "You're giving up. Try and think of ways to get back on your feet." She poked my arm in assurance and support.
"I will be homeless and starving by the time I'm back on my feet-if I ever get back on my feet."
Viv gave me a look. "Alright, let's go." I tried to protest, but she was already grabbing my arm and I was too drained to fight back. "We're going to think of another way to save your dream."
"Unless my parents magically appear with a secret trust fund-" But she was already leading me out of the room while I tried to unlatch myself from her hold. Viv insisted that we were going to save the shop and dragged me out of the shop. It was too early to close up, but then again, why would it matter when I had no customers?
I waited a few seconds for the universe to answer and solve everything for me when I realized where the universe was pulling me to.
"No, no." I shook my head, trying to drag my feet back so she wouldn't force me in that direction.
"Come on." Viv was taller and stronger so she overpowered me, dragging me to the one place the universe called me to.
Viv's idea of saving my shop was dragging me into Jesse's company.
Fuck you, universe.
In the two years since he had moved, I had only been inside twice, and I couldn't seem to recall those moments or if they had been a fragments of my imagination. Viv practically dragged me inside while I attempted to drag us back. People darted their curious gazes to us. If they had seen me around, which clearly they had, they could finally close their argument on whether I was a crazy bitch or not.
Jesse's office was on the second floor, so Viv dragged me up the stairs and pulled me toward the office. I was jealous of the asshole. He had the whole floor to himself, which was huge and spacious, leaving the rest of his employees on the first floor. Huge stacks of shelves filled with books lined up the second floor.
Without knocking, she barged inside. Jesse turned his chair around. He looked at me, finally saw that it was I, his longtime enemy, Iris, gracing him with my presence. He grinned, which I thought was unnerving. Viv pushed me towards his desk and I almost threw myself over it.
"Can you please find a way to fix Iris' problem?"
Not only did Jesse swung his gaze to Viv on her remark, but it had me spinning around in shock, because clearly, that was not what I had been expecting to hear. Neither did he.
"Excuse me?" I exclaimed.
"Come again?" His tone wasn't exactly sarcastic, but it was clear he was confused as hell or still shocked on seeing me in his office.
Well, me too, asshole.
"Help save her dream," Viv repeated, stating more clearly.
I wanted to let out a chuckle.
She wanted Jesse to help save my dream? The man who had crushed every little dream of mine? The man who told me I couldn't be a model because I was short and ugly when I became fixated with modeling at the age of twelve? Or the man who scared me out of asking out my crush? The man who stole the poem I wrote when I was twelve and printed it out for the whole school to see? To this day, I still couldn't read a poem or think about writing one. That Jesse? She wanted him to save my dream?
He was the last person who would offer to help.
"Because I'm unemployed and have time on my hands? Or because you looked around and couldn't find any sensible person willing to help a soul-sucking person?" he asked blandly. He wasn't even lookin at her, but me.
Anger bloomed like a parasite inside me. How dare he call me a soul-sucking woman?
"Oh, come on, boss-"
"I'm paying you to assist me, Viv," he reminded her, dark eyes narrowing to slits. "I don't remember assigning you a side job. If you don't have too much on your hands enough to want to help someone else, then I would find a task for you."
His words rang through the office, startling Viv. She blinked as if she couldn't believe her boss could be a little bitch, but I knew better. I huffed out a humorless laugh. Unwelcome frustration touched my heart. I spun around to leave.
"If she came here for help, I would offer any help if she asks me. It wouldn't be the first time."
I stopped in front of the door, hand gripping the knob and listened to what he said. I tilted my head and breathed before turning around. We glared at each other from across the room.
"Do you remember my third year?" I started to say, slowly walking back to him. His brows shot up, waiting for me to clarify. "I was sick. I had an unfinished essay due the next day and a test after. I was so sick I could barely open my eyes. Do you remember?" I didn't care if he remembered or not. I was going to make him remember. "You were on campus that day. I don't know why you came, but you were there."
The edges of his lips curled. He remembers.
I continued, "My roommate saw you. I think you two were going to hook up, but you found out I was sick. You came to my room and saw me shivering on my bed. My computer was opened and the whole bed was covered with books."
His gaze narrowed.
"What was it you said?" I asked, rhetorically. "that you wanted to help me, but I still don't know why you felt the need to. It was pity, wasn't it? But what did I say when you offered? I told you no, yes?" I stroked the sleek edge of his desk. "And what happened after? I failed the test because I couldn't study. I submitted my essay late and got points deducted." I looked him in the eye now. "If I was willing to fail that day, do you think I wouldn't be willing to lose my shop if you're going to be the one to help?" I gritted out, facing his stunned, furious silence.
I didn't wait for him to say anything. I walked around the desk, approaching him just as he wheeled his chair around to keep his gaze on me. I smiled at the anger written on his face. I halted a distance away, still keeping my eyes on him. My hand pulled the first drawer on his desk. Jesse didn't move or say anything when I put my hand inside and picked up the green note.
I looked back again, slowly taking the pen he was holding before leaning down on the desk to scribble on the note.
I hate everything that comes from you.
After writing that, I returned the pen back to his hand and slapped the note on the screen of his computer.
Before I could turn to walk away, he snatched my arm in his hold. "You will need my help," he said between clenched jaws. "Maybe not from this, but you will need my help." He let me go and turned away. I had hit a nerve. I realized it the moment I saw his face looking as black as the night sky, brows drawn together over icy eyes.
"I won't," I responded between stiff lips and he scowled. Viv tried to follow me when I headed for the door, but he called her back.
"Do the job that's paying you, Vivienne," he warned. The threat was loud and clear.
She turned back and told me she was going to call, but I didn't care. She pissed me off by dragging me in here and asking him to help me. Viv knew how sensitive I get around him, and yet, she forgot every frustrated words that left my mouth when I spoke about him to her.
"Whatever." I slammed the door shut on my way out.