Calvin Leans over me, sensing the excitement between our bodies. Feeling a thick flaming enthusiastic energy, with radiating heat rising between us. My heart has a new reaction as Calvin fuses his lips to mine. Changing its rhythm brings my awareness to it.
Finally, I catch my breath as he relocates his lips. Using a soft lightly touching kiss that started upon my chin, continuing down my neckline to my shoulder. Calvin paused after a quick peck to my collar bone. Raising his head up he looks directly into my eyes, giving me a new smile I had never seen before. Feeling confused by the innocents that appeared in his eyes, with this new childish grin. It doesn't make sense to me when I feel into this heavy blanket of sexual energy between us.
His intent feels genuine, soft and caring. Tenderly dragging his lips down my stomach, only stopping to kiss my navel. Creating a tingling sensation to run up my spine. Calvin sprang back up towards my face again. Hovering above me all hot and bothered, kissing me vigorously on the lips. I can sense this massive explosion of lust rushing through him. Calvin's body language had changed. He went from giving sweet soft and gentle kisses to being a hungry, hot and heavy horny animal.
Whoa, what's happening here? Calvin pounces on me like a hungry lion about to devour his prey! Getting handsy he proceeded to try to unbutton my pants, he's shifted again into full throttle mode. Before I could think of what to do next, I heard an inner voice whisper in my mind. He is not the right one, this is not the right time! Knowing in my heart this loving voice is telling me the 100% truth! Although my body and its hormones are screaming yes, look at him he is so damn adorable with that sexy confidence and those baby blues!
This is the first time my body has reacted so strongly to anyone. How can my mind and heart be telling me one thing and this body another? They need to get on the same page as one another, this is serious.
In a fraction of a second, I realized I was no longer in the experience with my body. I have taken back control with my awareness as the observer. I'm the captain of this body, and with this realization I steered myself back on course. Being the one whole self, body, mind and heart, I was in control. Immediately pushing Calvin's hand away from my pants and breaking away from his spellbinding lip lock.
"I am not doing this with you! It doesn't feel right, I know I'm waiting to share this experience with someone I plan to share my life with. Not to be rude, but you and I both know it's not going to be you! I only get to have the experience of my first time once in this life." Speaking my truth, in the gentlest way possible, not wanting to hurt or upset him.
Getting up from the bed to face Calvin I reach out my hand and kindly place it to his cheek.
"I want you to know Calvin that you are special to me! I have grown to have feelings for you, and that's not a lie! I can't explain it to you, but somehow, I just know deep in my heart with everything I am, you're not The One!"
Calvin gives me a look of disappointment, then nods his head in agreement.
"I get it, no worries and that feelings thing Hannah it's mutual!" Giving her a wink before I vanished out the bedroom door, feeling embarrassed.
Getting about halfway down the hall before I started to feel like a jerk. I'm not used to being turned down. It has never happened to me before, and man does it suck! Basically, this chick told me I wasn't good enough to be her first. I respect that and think highly of her. Turning around I walked back to my room and peeked my head through the doorway.
"Do you want a sprite? Sorry I took off like that, I needed to take a break for a minute to calm myself down. We should head to the kitchen and grab a drink. You must be parched from that last make out session, I know I am. I still need to call Nina and quickly finish that paper. After that's done, we can jet to Tom's house." Nervously slapping the molding on the doorway like a drum. Hannah cheerfully smiles at me as she walks over to the doorway to meet me. Being a gentleman, I take her hand and lead the way to the kitchen.
Calvin keeps glancing up at me while he's making a sandwich. I'm guessing there is something on his mind, but he isn't sure if he should share it. After the sandwich was made, he placed the butter knife down on the plate. Placing both of his hands directly on the countertop he takes a deep breath. Giving me that half smile of his as he Leans over the counter. He opens his mouth, and the words came rushing out like water, as if a damn had just busted open.
"Hannah, I am going to be real with you for a minute here, so please listen to me. I'm only going to say this once as your friend, not as your boyfriend! This is something you really need to hear, and I am telling you this because I care about you. Now keep that in mind and don't get mad at me. Alright, Hannah don't you ever come on too strongly to a guy like you did with me in the hall at school!
Unless you're sure he's The One and you're ready! Male hormones aren't something to mess with, they can cloud a dude's judgment. A girl might think she is being playful, but the guy might think she is leading him on for more. So, everything seems to be going fine one minute right. That is until she stops him cold turkey because they were not on the same wavelength. You following me?
Now it sets the stage for a problem to arise. If this dude is all turned on and he doesn't know how to control himself. Those strong urges could change into a rage caused by the same chemistry in his body. The dude could end up snapping back at you! Just to make this extremely clear, I am not saying this should be an excuse for the way a guy behaves!
I would never say a chick has no right to change her mind either, because of course you always do remember that! I want you to have this knowledge for future reference when I'm not around. Do me a favor, pass it along to the other girls maybe it can give them a new perspective on guys. I never want to be one of those types of dudes, and that's why I walked away earlier. It had nothing to do with you it was about me." Feeling out of breath from my long-winded speech. I gave Hannah a minute to absorb the information, while I silently cut the sandwich in half.
Why such a long spiel, and what does he mean about telling me as a friend and not as my boyfriend? Then there was the whole it's not you it's me thing? Calvin still hasn't said a word to me after his long ass lecture. Quietly he hands me half of his sandwich on a paper towel. Then he grabbed two cold sprites from the fridge and placed one in front of me. It's not like us to sit in silence together and it's weirding me out. I guess he's waiting for me to say something next, and I'm sitting here with a loss of words right now. Opening my mouth I just blurt out what came to mind first.
"That has got to be the weirdest break up speech I have ever heard. I guess, I should say thanks buddy!" Calvin is sitting beside me now eating his sandwich. I made sure to pat him on his back like I would with one of my guy friends after a good talk. Then I went back to eating my own sandwich.
"Wait, what? No, no,NO that was not meant to be a breakup speech! HANNAH, you got that all wrong!" Dropping my sandwich, in shock of what she just said. Dumbfounded I Turn my head to the side to look her in the eyes.
"Huh, well what is the point of us dating then! when obviously you want to you know, and I'm not going to you know, with you!" Giving him wide eyes and shrugging my shoulders, as if to say makes sense to me.
"Well, let me give you my list of reasons why I'm dating you!
1. I like you.
2.Your fun to be around and hang out with.
3. I care about you!
And finally.
4. Just because I want to do it, doesn't mean I have to you know, with you." Chuckling through my words. It's extremely clear Hannah is not ready to have sex, the choice words she uses to describe it shows how innocent she truly is.
"Don't make fun of me!" Calvin tried so hard to hold in his laughter. That word pushes a lot of my buttons. It's probably because of the way I was raised and the things I saw as a child.
"Never, I love your innocents. We both know we don't have the chance to get serious anyway. So, let's make the most out of the time we do have. We can still have tons of fun and keep it pg. Why don't you go watch some TV, while I make this call to Nina and finish this paper." This all sounds so simple in my mind, but I'm not stupid there will be times when I will have to just get up and walk away.
Spying from the doorway I watch Calvin pick up the mess and wipe down the countertop. Then he grabs his backpack and sits down. Pulling out his binder, setting it down on the countertop. He reaches for a pen from the ceramic blue mug that is placed by the phone. Opening his binder with pen in hand he picks up the phone receiver and dials Nina's phone number.
Knowing any second, he could catch me spying on him, I mossy my way to the living room. The good news is it's within an ear shot of the kitchen. Sitting down on the couch I grabbed the remote and turned on the tube to watch MTV.
Waiting impatiently for Nina to answer her damn phone, I heard Salt and Pepper playing in the background. Hannah must be watching MTV, interested to see what she was doing, I peeked into the living room. Getting distracted as I watched Hannah dancing around the room to the music having a great time. She's so much fun!
"Hello, hello is anyone there?" Nina picked up the phone.
"Oh hey, What's up Nina?" I completely forgot I was on the phone.
"Not much just sitting here wondering when you were going to call me!" Nina sounded annoyed.
"Yeah, sorry about that I had something to do earlier." I couldn't come up with a quick enough excuse for why it took me so long to get back to her.
"Like who?" Now she's just being sassy.
"Now come one don't be like that; you're not my girlfriend!" stating a fact to Nina. Reminding her it's none of her business, what or who I was doing.
"Well, what would you call me then?" Nina is just playing head games with me now. Is she really trying to get me to label the relationship I have with her?
"A friend!" Emphasizing the word friend. Knowing damn well Hannah is not more than 50 feet or so from me in the other room.
"Wow, I can't image what it's like to be your girlfriend then!" Sounding more condescending than ever.
"What's that supposed to mean!" getting on the defensive I yell back at her. Then remembering Hannah was still here, I lowered my voice and played it cool.
"Don't play stupid with me Calvin! Do you think I believe you hold and kiss all your friends, do you? I'm not that dense!" Unbelievable she is calling me out right now, like she knows something.
"I don't care what you believe Nina! I'm known to be comforting to my friends that are girls." What can I say, I know I'm a big flirt! It shouldn't be shocking news to you by now.
"Yeah, you know on second thought your right! You were sure comforting that friend of yours named Hannah today all over school. Oh, and from what I have heard and seen with my own eyes, she's more than just one of your friends Calvin!" Damn Nina's sniffing around asking about Hannah now. I need to get off the phone with Nina asap. I'm already pissed off at her enough and I don't think I can keep my cool with her any longer. Then Hannah will really have her suspicions about Nina, and it will be like waving a big red flag at her.
Let me know in the comments how you're feeling about Mr. Filmore?
Thanks for all your support on my writing journey, I appreciate and send loving energy to each one of you! Much ⤠Hetza E.
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DISCLAIMER This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, business, events and incidents are the products of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Copyright © 2021, 2022,2023,2024,2025 by Hetza E. All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.