(NEW) SNOOPING AND SNEAKING...

It was seven in the morning, way to early for a normal person to be up and about on a Sunday, but I was. Mainly because I hadn't slept at all. I'd replayed the conversations we'd had over and over again. The one at the party, the one outside the restaurant and then again at the door.

God so much can happen in a week and I bundled all my laundry together, wrapped myself up in extra scarfs and put two warm tops on and waddled down to the laundry room. I hated the fact the laundry room was in the basement parking lot, which was as cold as a morgue in winter. And then to top it off, the washing lines were on the roof- they couldn't be further away if they tried.

I walked into the washing room and immediately saw it. A portable CD player. What the hell was it doing here? I walked over to the thing and looked down at it.

"Press Play."

A note written by Ben was stuck to the top of it. I reluctantly reached out and pressed play, nervous of what the hell I was going to hear. Suddenly Justin Bieber filled the room...

"Is it too late to say sorry... Cause I'm missing more than just your body."

His voice echoed around the room. I skipped to the next song and more music...

"Please forgive me if I need you like I do. Please believe me. Every word I say is true... Please forgive me. I can't stop—"

I quickly skipped. I knew the lyrics of that song. A big 80s power ballad was next...

"After all that we've been through. I will make it up to you, I promise to."

I stopped the CD and stared down at the player. I didn't really know what to think about this? A CD full of sorry songs wasn't exactly going to make it all better. I pushed the CD player aside and loaded the washing machine. I sat on top of it waiting for the cycle to be over while munching my way through a bar of "sugar free" chocolate and drinking a cup of coffee which had also been conveniently left for me.

Suddenly the sound of a little girls voice could be heard echoing through the room. I knew exactly who it was.

I climbed off the machine and stuck my head around the corner, just in time to see Ben and Li climbing out of his car. She was giggling and so was he. I stayed there and watched him interact with his daughter. I wanted to watch him, as if watching him closely, inspecting him might give me some of the answers to the questions I had about him. I also wanted to watch him because despite everything that had happened, I just couldn't help myself from being drawn to him.

I studied every little thing about it. The way he held her hand softly as they walked, they way his eyes lit up with he looked down at her, the way her entire face lit up when she looked up at him. Suddenly the machine stopped and a bell started going off. I saw Ben's head lift and look in my direction. He caught my eyes briefly and smiled. I jumped back behind the wall.

Half an hour later I was standing on the freezing cold roof, trying to hang my delicates in the only beam of sunlight penetrating the gloomy winter's day. I had just finished and was almost frozen from the wind when I heard that familiar laugh again. I moved over to the side railing and looked down. Ben and Li were playing in the garden together. He was chancing her around and she was giggling. I sighed. The more I watched them together, the more I forgot why I was angry with him in the first place, which was so wildly inconvenient since I'd sworn once again to hate him for all eternity. I wanted to turn away and stop watching this, but I couldn't. So stalker of me. I know.

So I took the lift down to the bottom floor again and then tried to creep silently into the garden. There was a small path running against the wall at the back of the rose bushes. If I crept against the wall, I would pop out by the tree and I could see properly. So I put my back to the wall and started sliding across it.

Oh scarf. Oh long, woolen, fluffy scarf that is not conducive to creeping through thorny bushes. I felt it tug as it got caught behind me on some devilish looking thorns. I turned to undo it and the other side swung out and straight into another bunch of thorns. .Both ends of my scarf were now trapped, and every time I leaned over to deal with one side, I pulled the other side even tighter. The more I moved, the worse it got. Maybe if I bend down and lifted it over my head? But as I pulled- hard- the one side yanked against the rose bush, snapping the branch and causing the scarf to slap me through the face.

"Crap!" I quickly ducked in anticipation of the thorny branch plummeting into my eye. Luckily it didn't

"That's not a very nice word." The little sing-song voice said, my hands were still over my face to protect against the thorns. I pulled them down and there she was, and he for that matter. Both staring at me.

"My dad says that you should never say that word."

I looked up at Ben and he had an awkward smile on his face.

"Well, your dad is right."

"Dad is right about all things." Li said with an adoring tone in her voice.

"Well, maybe not all things, "I said gently, "but he is right about that bad word."

"No, I'm right about all things." Ben said teasingly.

"No, I don't think you are." I forced a little laugh. "No one can be right about all things."

"No! My dad is right about everything." Li spoke loudly and sounded wildly protective.

"Hahah, yes, you're probably right." I conceded. I wasn't going to argue with a six year old who adored her father more that pink tutus and shiny things.

"So, the roses, hey?" Ben folded his arms and looked at me, his brow furrowing in a curious questioning manner.

"I was going to prune them." I said as fast as possible. It was the first thing that had come to mind, the fact that I was without garden sheers, was merely an irrelevant detail that hopefully Ben was going to overlook... not likely.

"I didn't know you were into gardening."

I nodded. "Yup. I love pruning roses."

"Like you love running 10 miles in the morning." Ben smiled. My heart skipped a beat as I watched his whole face change as that naughty, skew smile lit up his green eyes.

"Ben!" I suddenly declared for no reason whatsoever

"Sera. Sera Holmes."

"Mmmm. Ben. Ben White."

"So we meet again." He said.

I looked at him, shook my head slightly in disapproval and shrugged. "It would seem so."

"Weren't you also down in the laundry room earlier?" he asked.

I nodded. "That was me. Doing the laundry."

"Very diligent of you."

"I try." I folded my arms trying to look casual and not look like a person that had just been busted for snooping and sneaking and general creepy-stalkery behavior.

"Happen to listen to any good music latterly?"

"Mmmm, not that I can recall I said quickly. But thanks for asking."

"Pleasure." He smiled at me and I couldn't help my tiny smile in response.

"And now?" he looked at my scarf.

"I seem to be a bit stuck." I said.

"Why don't you just take the pruning sheers and cut that other branch it's hooked on."

"The pruning sheers." I repeated.

"You do have some, I presume?" He was gleefully toying with me once more. He knew it and I knew it.

"I wish!" I shot him a pursed mouth glare that implied that if I did, I might be forced to use them on him.

A small chuckle escaped his mouth and I hated how playfully adorable he was right now.

"But seriously, do you need some help?" he gestured to the stuck scarf again.

"No, no. I'm fine."

Now that the one side was free I wiggled out of the scarf easily. I tried to pull it lose from the thorns, but it was stuck, so I abandoned it and slid back out against the wall until I arrived in the garden.

"You're just going to leave that there?"

"It's not going anywhere."

We stood in silence and regarded each other for a moment.

"Li and I were just going to go up and have breakfast, would you like to join us."

"Oh No! No, no, no thanks." I quickly dismissed the notion as absolutely mental. Mental that we should be literally breaking bread this morning after everything that had transpired between us this last week, last night, a few hours ago actually.

"But were having waffles." Ben said picking Li up so she was at eye level.

"Thanks for the offer, but..."

"Please come." Li's little voice rang out.

I looked at her and she looked back at me with those sweet little eyes. "Sorry sweetie, I have some things to do so I can't, but maybe next time."

She looked suddenly disappointed and my guilt- o- meter sky- rocketed.

"Please. I'll share mine with you if there aren't enough." Jeez, dagger of guilt through my beating heart. She looked at me with a sad face and slumped shoulders. How the hell was it humanly possible to say no to that? It was not even an option, and Ben knew it, judging by his smile.

"You can't say no to that face." He half mouthed to me.

"Manipulative." I mouthed back.

"Please." She asked again.

"On one condition," I said, "We go out for breakfast. Not up there," I pointed at the apartments. The idea of being in his apartment again was just so intimate and so wrong.

"Deal!" He said looking pleased with himself and raising a gleeful Li up over his head and onto his shoulders.

"Let me just go and change first." I walked ahead.

"You look great." Ben's words stopped me and I turned slowly. I was wearing one of the worst Sunday morning outfits that I had ever managed to rustle up.

"Doubtful." I started walking back towards the building.

"Factual." He shouted after me.

"Hmmph." I wasn't convinced. But as I approached the lift Ben's hand shout out and caught me on the back of my jumper. I turned.

"Come." He pulled me slightly, "You look...." His eyes moved up and down my body, "Great." His voice was soft and silky again, like liquid gold and I could feel myself falling for it again, until I became aware of the small person looking down at me.

"You're very pretty." She said. "Not as pretty as my mommy, though. She's the prettiest."

Li was right about that, and in that moment of terrible hair, undress and mess, I didn't really feel like being reminded of how effing gorgeous his ex wife was. Ben gestured with his head in the direction of the garage.

"Fine." I said. Why should I even care what I was wearing? It's not like I was trying to impress him after all. In fact, maybe the worse I looked, the better.