Chapter Two

A deadpan silence fell over the table. Despite the fact that we had been going out for a little over a year, we couldn't find it in us to say anything. It was like we had all forgotten our words back at 4th period English. Everyone knew the reason. Hell, even I knew the reason. Not talking about the reason though seemed a good way to carry on. The minute words started to fill the air; true intentions would have been brought to the surface.

Sabrina Valdez was too good for me. I'd decided this a long time ago. Despite being a cheerleader, and one of the most popular girls at school, her heart remained in the right place. She was not a common place cliché. She was not some John Hughes knockoff of what a popular girl was. Sabrina was someone who cared deeply, someone who's words would always carry weight and whose silence broke the hearts of those around her. Such a shame that mines was already broken to begin with.

I stared down at my food, slowly picking my way through whatever inedible mess lay strewn on the ceramic. The grey mush seemed to move and have a mind of its own. Even stabbing it with a fork might only provoke it to attack.

"Xavier," came the soft voice of the girl with the strawberry blonde hair and piercing green eyes. "Can we talk?"

"No" I responded, my voice deadpan. No, the last thing I needed right now was to feel like something was wrong. I already knew that I was unfixable, but for a moment I believed that maybe there was more to me than the scars which plagued me. "No, I don't want to talk Sabz."

Her face half-lit up with that infectious smirk that she wore all too well. The black hole would soon come for that too.

"Babe, please" she pleaded, not daring to make her voice be heard amongst the other sounds of the lunchroom. I doubt that would ever happen, because her voice was as smooth as silk. It was pure and clean, unlike the shrillness of the other students. The jocks roared amongst themselves with a cantankerous laughter, whilst everyone else spoke in a tone various levels higher than what I was used too.

"It's not important." I said this between mouthfuls of grey slop. Were it not for the fact that having an empty mouth would have forced me to talk, I would have thrown it up right then and there.

"Xavier..." Her voice was familiar, hinted with something I'd heard before; disappointment. I wish I knew how to ignore it.

"Not. Important" I shot back, my eyes lifting to meet her own. There was something so warm and delicate about her features.

How could I even begin to put into words that they no longer excited me the way they did? The worst part of falling out of love with someone is having them know that you've fallen out of love with them. I was an asshole for leading her on. I was a dick for not telling her the truth. But I couldn't.

"Stop doing that." Sabrina replied, her cheeks flushing slightly with an anger I'd rarely ever seen.

"Doing what?"

"Shutting yourself off every time we try and have a normal conversation."

"I'm not shutting myself off, I'm just refusing the conversation. Me shutting you off would be more like me pretending I didn't hear you." In my head there was a big difference here. Refusing to answer her question, whilst still acknowledging it indicated that it wasn't worth talking about. Never would I choose to ignore someone. To me it seemed like the cowards way out of an honest question.

"So what, you're the only person that's allowed to feel things?"

Her voice, whilst still as delicate as ever, was getting more and more frantic. Her brows seemed to knot together, giving me a poisonous backdraft. Never before had I ever seen her with such contempt for me. Not even at the hospital when I'd refused to see her.

"I didn't say that"

"But you were thinking about it"

"True"

Maybe it's the way it came off, or perhaps it was just the words, but at that moment, Sabrina Valdez rose from her seat. She was getting ready to abandon this table, and my heart. Not that it was her choice to abandon it in the first place.

"Whatever," she retaliated, pushing herself up from the table. "Do whatever you want, but just know that we're not done having this conversation."

"That's what you think."

As she walked off, I could hear the mutterings of a foreign tongue fill the air. If I'd paid any note in Spanish class, I might have understood her. Something told me that right now I probably wouldn't want to understand her. I'd prefer to keep her as my sweetest mistake; not that she was a mistake, but the entirety of me being with her was so farfetched to have not been a mistake.

As exasperation passed my lips for what felt like the twelfth time today, the sounds of scrapping chairs occupied the air across from me. With any luck, they would go away soon. I was in no mood to deal with this type of shit today.

Alas, this was not to be.

"What's up Domino?" For as long as I'd known him, Anthony Young and his cronies had always called me 'Domino.' Apparently their reasoning was due to my mixed-race upbringing. Somehow in present day Virginia people still had a problem with two people of different backgrounds coming together and sharing their love. They loved it; it gave them an excuse to be assholes.

Were they to try and pick a fight with any other kid, they might have gotten knocked the fuck down. But somehow, when it came to me, no one decided to speak up. Maybe it's because I didn't care, or perhaps it had something to do with the fact that at the end of the day these three -Anthony Young, Gabriel Mitchell, and Caleb Washington- were in fact the only three friends I had in this school at this moment.

"I thought I told you to knock that off" I growled, my tone feeling less fierce now than it would have been ten seconds ago. Where I a fighting person, I might have launched myself across this table right towards Tony. Despite my arm, I knew I could still take him. He knew this too.

"Don't be so pissy Dommy" Gabe managed to pipe up, planting himself down on a seat turned towards me. I couldn't help but feel that I'd be less pissy if these asshatted clowns just left me alone for five seconds.

But this was my life now. Apparently during the summer break I'd become far too intense for anyone to like. My friends quickly turned heel after they heard about the accident, and my teammates ceased to be my teammates. The only people I could actually rely on for company were my girlfriend, who was pretty much not my girlfriend by this point, and these fools. The black hole had consumed my friendships, and I could not care less.

Caleb just stood there with a stupid grin on his face. He felt like nothing more than a hype-man for the much taller Gabe, and the much rounder Anthony. Any personality he had seemed to fall by the wayside. I felt sorry for him. He seemed to be stuck in a black hole of his own, standing in the shadows of two superior personalities. However, the way his mouth curled up, it was the face that made me want to drop all inhibitions most of all. What I wouldn't give to knock that look off of his face.

"So Dom," Anthony started. I immediately shot him my own death glare, but he tossed it aside with a flick of his fat wrist. "Since you're done with that little thang, why don't you introduce us" he spoke, referring to Sabrina. Over my dead body. I couldn't help but think. Our relationship might have been figuratively dead, but I would be damned if I was going to let some pissant with a gap tooth big enough to park a car in take her.

She deserved better than him. Hell, she deserved better than me. I didn't want to think about that right now.

Even then. there was no way that she would even consider the thought of dating either of them. Popularity might not have been her game to play, but she sure as hell knew when she was out of someone's league. Which honestly begged the question; why did she even bother with me in the first place?

"No"

"No?"

"No."

"What the hell do you mean no" barked Gabe.

"I wasn't aware that the word no had another meaning" I replied with a smirk. "Sorry friends, but the answer is an indisputable no."

"And why the fuck not?"

"Because last time I checked," I looked both ways across the table before leaning in with a whisper in my throat. "She's still my girl." The best thing about winning by technicality, it still counted as winning.

"Not for long" Tony grumbled.

"Yeah, not for long" Caleb piped in.

Maybe so, but I still got all the cards in my hand you fat fuckwad.