(Picture of Wayne Owens)
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We head to KFC for lunch since it is going to be Drew's treat. Among all of us, Drew isn't as well-to-do as the rest since he's the only one who doesn't have a car. Most of the time, he takes rides from Wayne or travel on public transportation. We didn't want him to go even more broke than he already is, so we chose KFC although feeding six people is still going to cost him quite a sum.
"Why isn't Wayne here again?" Cass brings it up when the six of us settle into our seats. The girls sit on side while the guys sit across us.
"Bianca duties, he said."
Ally isn't as annoyed about him anymore. In fact, she has been actively trying to ignore him even during our Fridays lunch where she joins us for half an hour usually.
"What about that devil?" She scrunches up her nose.
"It's a long story," Drew continues, although we all feel like he probably shouldn't be revealing this to us since it isn't his story to tell. "So, Bianca is cousin to Justin."
Justin. I haven't heard that name in ages. He has already graduated from our college but he's still an alumni, although thankfully I haven't bumped into him ever since the first party three months ago.
"Justin Rickson?"
He nodded. "Yup. And I think y'all by now should know Justin is a mother fucking asshat."
Everyone except Ally agrees silently. Ally hasn't met him before so obviously she isn't going to make any judgement. "How's that relevant to why he's fucking Bianca?" I ask crudely, not giving a damn to my language.
"Well, you see." Drew puts down the fried chicken in his hands and takes a sip of his coke. "Justin was the guy that his ex dumped him for."
A collective 'ooooh' comes out of Ally's, Cass' and my mouth. I haven't exactly heard that story before other than that one time that Zac briefly mentioned to me. It's no surprise that I generally don't ask people about their personal matters until they want to tell me on their own accord.
"And Bianca knows about it. I mean, she knew it beforehand it was going to happen."
"How?"
"She hated June." I assume that's my brother's ex-girlfriend's name. "And you probably won't find it shocking that some girls are absolutely mental and will do whatever it is to get whoever they want."
Oh, we know. I can attest that the female species is really fucking crazy.
"Okay. I think I see it now." I piece things up together. "So he's doing this for revenge?" The boys nodded. "But how is it revenging when he's pleasing her by being with her? That makes no sense whatsoever."
"That's the stupid part." Zac takes it on. "He wants her to fall for him and then make her watch him cheat on her."
"What?" Cass and I yell out incredulously. That's insane. Revenge cheating is stupid as hell and a never-ending cycle.
"I know right." Carson joins in. "He wouldn't even hear how dumb it is."
"The crazy part is, he plans the third party to be Justin's current chick." Drew mentions, making all of us take a second to process the information. That's possibly the craziest thing I've heard come out of a 22-year-old's head. My brother is officially brainless.
"And y'all just let him?" Ally asks in disbelief.
"What else do you think we can do, dearest?" That nickname is Drew's specific one for Ally. He almost has one for each and every girl he talks to. He calls me 'babe' or 'sweetheart' occasionally while Cass is 'darling'.
Ally shrugs, looking slightly disappointed. I guess she never expected Wayne to stoop that low. "I don't know. Stop him, advise him, give him a good waking up. Something, at least."
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I'm so pissed.
We are finally getting a long weekend for Thanksgiving break yet here I am, being woken up at 7 AM by no one else but myself. My uterus has to squeeze and stab me inside so bad that I jump out of my sleep trembling and hugging my own tummy. It's so bad. Nothing is worst than waking up to having your period plus the wrath of first-day cramps.
I almost couldn't get up, but I knew I have to if I don't want to bleed everywhere on my sheets. Everyone else is still asleep at this hour so I practically crawl my way to the bathroom to pee and put on a night pad for sleep. On the way out, I grab a cup of water from the sink and proceed to pop two ibuprofen at once. Knowing the first hour is considered the least painful, I have to immediately get myself back to bed otherwise I likely won't be able to sleep when the real cramps kick in.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
That's the fourth time someone has been knocking at my door. I had it locked earlier because I didn't want my brother or anyone of the guys to walk in on me while I'm sleeping, especially if I were to accidentally leak on the bed that'll be incredibly embarrassing. Not forgetting the fact that I failed to check my phone and it has been vibrating for hours since I had it on silent so I could sleep.
I turn to my right and check the bedside drawer, noticing it's already 4:30PM on the alarm clock. My blinds are shut to the maximum so I couldn't see any sunlight at all, hence I couldn't really tell the time of day. Though the room is cool and dark, I'm practically shivering and perspiring at the same time. The pain in my lower tummy is immense now and I needed more pills. Painkiller usually only lasts me four hours at once and I always require to pop eight times in order to last me through the day. I didn't manage to sleep well either since I keep drifting in and out from the pain and the noise from outside.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Again. I grip my shirt tightly in my fist in a fetus position. I have my pillow pressed over my stomach too so a little pressure and warmth can distract me. Man, nothing works. Nothing ever works.
"Leave me alone," I weakly shout to whoever is outside knocking my door. They must've said something earlier but I've been too out of it to comprehend whatever they were saying.
"Are you okay?" I recognize it as Zac's voice. I'd get the door for him if it isn't because I barely want to leave my bed at all. I don't want to move nor talk, but clearly he won't go away until I assure him I'm not dead. I reach for my phone and hastily swipe away all the notifications. There's a couple of texts from group chats, and Cass. Cass and I text regularly since the beginning so when I didn't respond for the entire afternoon, she sort of figured out today is the start of my cycle.
I go to my messages and click on Zac.
Me: I'm fine.
I hear his phone chime from my text message. "Open up, Kelsey." He insists. I sigh, struggling to write him another text.
Me: I'm really okay. I just need rest.
Instead of replying me, he chooses to speak through the door. "What's wrong? You haven't been out all day. It's already mid-noon."
Me: Nothing. I'm just really tired and need sleep. I swear.
I mean, it will be weird telling him I'm dying inside from menstrual cramps. Nobody knows how bad it is except Cass. Wayne usually thinks that I just like to camp in my room when I'm having my periods due to moodswings. The first time I didn't come out of my room for two days, he barged in and I couldn't help but yell at him in my crazy state. Ever since then, he leaves me alone each time he notices I lock myself up for fear of facing my wrath again.
"No, open up at least." He demands and I wanted to pull my hair out. Not only are my organs torturing me, so is he. "Please, baby." He whispers it softer through the door, hoping nobody else hears it.
I get up on all fours, one hand still wrapping around my own tummy not having a choice. Standing up, I have to bend myself over to ease the pain slightly in order to take the few steps to the door. I unlock it and he automatically turns the door handle on his own.
"What's wrong?" He looks at me in my weird standing position. I quickly shuffle back to bed and flop myself down, curling back into a ball.
"I need to rest. Stop knocking." I mutter, not wanting to use anymore energy. I haven't even eaten nor drank anything at this point.
He closes the door behind him and attempts to switch on the lights to illuminate the dark room but I groan and he quickly flips it off again. He moves to the windows and pulls the blinds slightly back up so little rays of sunlight comes in the room.
"You're sweating and pale as hell, baby. What's wrong?" He sits down on my bed and sweeps my damp fringe off my forehead, not minding my perspiration at all.
I simply shake my head, not wanting to open my mouth to speak. He slowly inspects my face, my body position and all the open pill bottles on my bedside drawer and seems to figure it out on his own. "Is it cramps?" I nod faintly with my eyes shut.
"Is it really so bad?" He asks skeptically. Oh you have no idea, I wanted to shoot back at him but didn't because I rather have my peace at this point. I choose to ignore him instead. Maybe he'll leave me be as soon as he sees that I'm fast asleep.
I don't know when or how but I did eventually drift back to sleep. When I wake up, the sun has already set and my room is becoming dark again. The door is closed and Zac isn't anywhere in the room. The cramps just really have to linger there each time I open my eyes and it is so frustrating. For some reason, I begin to cry. Not just the pain but because I feel uncomfortable everywhere. My back is aching, my feet feels restless, I feel sticky and sweaty and dirty below. I know I need a shower but I barely have the energy to get up from bed. Most importantly, I'm hungry. I'm so damn hungry and that makes me cry.
My door creaks open and I sniffle, spotting a wet patch on my sheets nowâ tears, not blood. Zac immediately comes over to my bed and crouches down, checking on me. "Baby. Are you crying?" He cups my face with both hands.
With my eyes closed, I shake my head but tears continue to fall down my cheeks. Why am I so upset? I swear, those hormones. I'm crying like as if someone just told me I can no longer eat my favourite spaghetti. It's just one day of no food! But at the same time, I really want ice cream. And it has to be cookies and cream!
"Don't cry, shhh." He tries to console me, wiping my tears off. "What's wrong? Is it the pain?"
I shake my head, but ended up nodding instead. It's a yes and no, so I didn't know how to answer. My shirt is so wrinkled from the tight grasp of my fists all day.
"Baby..." he trails off, looking at me with sympathy. "Tell me what you need. I'll get it for you."
I will myself to stop crying. Pills. I need more pills. But I've already popped eight, and that's already exceeded the maximum dosage of six per day. Every month feels like hell to me. "I-I'm okay. I'm going to take a shower." I slowly push myself up with my elbows and sit up on bed.
"Alright. C'mon, I can walk you there and heat up the water for you. I'll get you your clothes too." He offers and I manage to put up a faint smile. I haven't been taken care of for more than a year. This feels nice.
I stay in the shower for at least an hour, and honestly would've stayed longer if it wasn't for Zac knocking on the door to get me out. Half the time I just sit on the floor and let the warm water rain over me, getting rid of my blood, sweat and tears all at once. One thing that made me feel slightly better is the fact that my Body Shop shower gel makes me smell amazing and I no longer feel so yucky about myself.
He brought me a white tanktop and furry shorts, probably thinking it'll make me feel better looking sexy but instead I really wanted to smack him. Why in the hell will someone on their period want to wear furry shorts? Goddamnit some men are so clueless.
"You okay? You've been in there for so long." He questions when I finally open the door.
"Yeah. I'm just going back to bed." I say as I push past him to get to my bedroom. The first thing I'm going to do is change into black leggings and a pullover because I sure as hell ain't going to risk leaking on these shorts.
"Wait, wait, wait." He follows me in. "You haven't had anything to eat."
I don't know why I am getting angry at this point. Maybe the shorts, maybe the fact he thinks I want to be sexy when I'm not feeling sexy at all, maybe because I'm famished, maybe the stupid cramps, maybe just maybe.
"Just leave me alone, Zac." I sigh as I pick something out of my closet harshly. I know I shouldn't be lashing out at him for no reason but those stupid damn hormones.
"Why are you mad, Kelsey? You don't like what I picked out for you?"
"No. God no." I groan and sit down on my desk chair, shoving my shorts down. The door is wide open yet I clearly no longer gives a shit if anybody walks pass. I need my bed. Just my bed.
"Okay. So, talk to me. Are you feeling better?" He tries to make small talks with me but it only annoys me. Why is it I'm the only one feeling like crap? I want everyone to suffer with me! It's not fair!
I suck in a deep breath, closing my eyes for a second. "You should leave, Zacson. I don't want to flare up at you because of my moodswings. I'll talk to you again in two days, okay? Just let me be on my own."
He remains silent for a while and I genuinely thought he's going to heed my advice. As I try to climb back to bed, his arms shoot out to grab me by my waist, halting me. "No." He says firmly. "I don't care if you shout at me. I will carry you downstairs if I have to."
Ugh. I groan loudly, almost wanting to kick his shin. "I don't want to go anywhere!"
"But I made food. Corn soup and alfredo pasta. Don't you want some? It's still warm and already prepared for you." He smirks, seemingly confident that I will cave.
Fuck. It's food! It's food! I can finally eat, and it's pasta! How can I say no? Even though it wouldn't stop the cramps, warm food will still make me feel slightly better. The downside is only having to leave the comfort of my bed.
"Fine. For the food," I turn towards the door but not before reaching out to grab one of my elephant plush toy on the way so I can press it against my tummy.
He smiles at how easy I gave in, then follow behind me as I walk down the stairs. Nobody seems to be in the house and that's what I want anyway. I honestly can't deal with any bombarded questions or excessive noise when my insides are already tearing me out.
I sit at the dining table and he brings me a plate of pasta and corn soup like he promised. I dig in while he saunters elsewhere doing his own stuffs. I haven't even checked my phone all day and I doubt I will since all I want to do is go back to sleep right after this.
Few minutes later, Zac comes back with a brown paper bag. He places it on the table and sits on the chair that Wayne usually sits. "What?" I ask, his brown orbs already watching me as I eat.
"I got you some stuffs." He jerks his chin towards the paper bag. Curiously, I open it up to see a bunch of random chocolate bars, chips and gummy bears in them. He also bought most of them in my favourite grape flavour. At the bottom is a hot water bag meant for the tummy and a couple of different painkillers.
I wanted to laugh at him and tell him chocolates don't work for me, but quickly dismissed the idea. He so nicely bought all these things for me, how can I be so ungrateful? I smile, almost wanting to tear up as I watch him look at me carefully. He's probably wondering what my next reaction will be.
I push my chair back and stand up, dropping myself in his lapâ startling him. Resting in the crook of his neck, I loop my arms behind him and snuggle into him. "Thank you. You're so sweet." I mumble into his skin.
He leans down and kisses the side of my head. "Anything for you, baby."