Chapter 22: Chapter Twenty One

GUN'S POV

"Anything for Gun."

"Anything for Gun."

"Anything for Gun."

"Anything for Gun."

Those words haunted me for days... I know I shouldn't give much meaning to it since we're just friends but I couldn't help but think of it... Is he like that to all of his friends or... he treats me special? Ugh I have to get up.

I've been busy with a lot of stuff since the incident, I needed to make sure everything was okay and nothing similar happens next. The incident didn't really affected the business that much, it was immediately responded to. I filed restraining order against Oab and that he is not allowed my property.

I also managed to get more security from my dad so that the younger customers will be safe whenever they wanted to keep going here. Off assured his fans that everything was fine so he contributed largely again on the promotion of my coffee shop.

I haven't left the coffee shop for almost two weeks now, Tay has been sending me final papers and details about the studio, I wanted to visit the studio today since there will be a meeting. I assured my staff that I will visit or go back when I finish from my meeting but my manager has also been bugging me to take some days off, they won't even serve me coffee anymore.

"Geez, you look like a zombie, have you been sleeping?" Tay asked when I walked in the nearly finished studio.

"Yeah, a little..." I said

"Pim told me you go home very late and leave too early, Gun get some rest" Tay said.

"I'm paranoid I guess. Even with a restraining order, who knows what Oab could do next?" I answered.

"But you are also gonna get sick and you won't be able to look after your coffee shop if they put you to medicines" Tay said.

He has a point though...

"Let's begin with the meeting." Tay said

"Off isn't here yet." New pointed out.

"He won't be coming, his personal assistant messaged me." Tay said.

I don't know what Off has been busy with but he has been this busy as well that he has been missing a lot of meetings. We talked about the opening ceremonies that we'll be doing and also the promos and projects we're making after the opening. I took down notes of the important dates to remember because I need to make some adjustments for the days that I'd spend in the coffee shop and in the studio.

"Gun, you're having dinner with me." Tay told me when we finished the meeting.

"I have to go back to the coffee shop." I said packing my stuff up.

"No. The coffee shop is doing just fine. Take the night off. I messaged the manager already, she said she'd tell me when something goes wrong." Tay said.

"New? A little help here?" I asked New for some help about Tay.

"Yeah I actually agree with Tay, I also have some place to be that's why I'm letting you go with him." New said.

Ugh. Of course Tay already talked to New about it. He always finds a way to get his way as well.

"Where to?" I asked when we were in my car.

"Our usual" He said smiling at me.

There's this diner that we always go to ever since high school and it's become our constant hang out place ever since. We often visit there when we don't feel like doing anything or even if we just feel like getting fat with the greasy burgers, chicken tenders and milkshakes.

We arrived at the diner and we went to our usual booth. Not gonna lie, but I missed this.

"How are things with you and Off?" Tay asked.

"Nothing. We're just friends I told you." I told him.

"Really Gun? You're not gonna tell him? I see that you're falling a lot more for him, buried feelings grow Gun." Tay told me

Good thing the server came to our table and took our orders but Tay didn't let the topic go, after we placed our orders he was waiting for my response again.

"I don't see any future with him okay? I am nothing compared to him, heck I won't even make it to one of his standards, plus I don't know if he's even open to that kind of relationship" I told Tay.

"Since when did you become that scared? Give it a try Gun, secrets turns into regrets sometimes." Tay said.

"Where have you been getting those words of wisdom, you seem like a different person." I asked him trying to change the topic

"There's this Filipino song, but it's english. Listen to it, the title is lifetime by the band ben&ben" He said and smiled at me.

"Okay I'll listen to it." I said.

"Just saying that you should shoot your shots before it's too late Gun, if you fall too hard and it gets too late, even that friendship that you're holding on to might be gone." Tay said.

I shrugged and good thing the food came. I took my phone out to take some pictures for instagram stories and such. I was uploading some boomerangs and photos when I saw Off posted on his stories. I opened it and to my surprise, he was on shooting but he was with this girl... He didn't seem too busy and he was just hanging out with the girl.

I closed that tab and opened my twitter. Fans were going crazy about him and that girl named Mild? There was a tweet from Mild saying that Off is done shooting why is he still hanging around with her...

I know jealousy was growing inside me but what can I do? I'm just his friends. I didn't let Tay see the change in my mood so I faked so much smile, it was tiring to be honest. I wanted to tell him about it but I don't even have the guts to tell Off about my feelings and I know I'll just burden Tay so much if he will keep on worrying about me.

"Please go straight home and get some sleep." Tay said when I dropped him off at his house.

"Yeah" I said but he turned to me again before shutting the car door.

"I'll ask your manager to message me when you come walking into your coffee shop again, I'll go there no matter what time it is." Tay said.

"I won't. Byeee, good night." I said trying to convince him.

I wasn't going back to my coffee shop. I wanted to think, I wanted a moment to myself. I went to the rooftop restaurant again. They were closing already and since I have access here anyway, I was glad when there was no one in my usual corner anymore.

I checked my phone, I couldn't help it but I kept stalking Off. He wasn't responding to any of my messages. I think he also turned off seen options for his phone so I don't know, but he has been really active posting and reposting stories from his friends. He even went out with some of them. Ugh this is frustrating.

I scrolled through twitter and saw more photos, fans are actually thinking he and Mild are a thing now. They were mentioning me as well because they wanted confirmation. Do I know? Do I even wanna know? Ugh. I was about to close the app because it was getting frustrating but then I saw Off tweeted. He wants to talk to his fans huh? He has a lot of time then.

I put my phone down for a bit and stared blankly to the view of the night lights of Bangkok. I miss New York so bad, I suddenly had the urge to run away again, until these feelings fade. It's funny how I don't catch feelings for anybody in New York but I fall so deep here in Bangkok. I opened my phone again and created a fake email and fake twitter account.

I disguised as a fan of Off hoping maybe he'd notice me...

forofftumcial: hey off! do you like someone atm? # talkwithoff

forofftumcial: what do you think about offgun? # talkwithoff

I left just two questions for him. I wasn't really hoping that he'd answer especially the second question, but I lowkey wanna know what he thinks about it.

off_tumcial: hey @forofftumcial, i think i do like someone atm... :)

I was shocked when I got flooded with notifications. HE ANSWERED ME?! But I didn't know what to feel about his answer and sadness was actually flooding me. He likes someone already, I guess I'm too late. Maybe all their theories were right after all, maybe he does like Mild...

I immediately deactivated the account that I made and some fans actually made a fuzz about it. They were so determined to know who owned the account, I didn't wanna open it anymore because they kept flooding me with Mild and Off's pictures and videos. I bit my lower lip, this shit hurts. Why do we even fall in love?!

Was there a lifetime waiting for us in a world where I was yours?

Paper planes and porcelain

I decided to listen to the song that Tay suggested for me. It was kind of sad to be honest, it hits me hard, it got me wondering if me and Off has a lifetime waiting for us... Maybe in another life I guess?

I was scared to lose you then

But secrets turn into regrets

Buried feelings grow

Oh, you were a good dream

I guess for me Off will just be a good dream. I didn't know what got into me but the next thing I knew is I was booking a flight to New York. I suddenly remembered Tay... he wanted to come.

Tay Tawan

Tay? You wanna come to New York with me?

wth? are you crazy? ofcourse, but not now?

im booking a flight, you wanna go or not?

WHAT?! WHEN?! ARE YOU OK?!

Yeah, I just wanna go... away...

are you coming or not?

what happened?!

where are you?

are you home?

i'm coming

I decided to buy an un-named ticket. Whoever wants to come with me can go... It'll just be a week of running away, let me just get my thinking straight again. I know this isn't a part of my budget at the moment but the coffee shop is doing so well both New York and Bangkok branch so I just wanted to give this as a gift to myself. I have an apartment there anyway. I don't need to worry about the accommodation.

It was hours of overthinking and just drowning in all the thoughts I have until I realized it was already 1AM. I drove home and I was walking to the liquor shelf when I shockingly saw Pim and Tay at the dining table with all the gadgets they could possibly have.

"Where have you been P'Gun?" Pim asked worried.

"Why aren't you answering our messages? We're so close to calling your parents and telling them you're missing" Tay said in panic.

"I took a time to myself." I said.

"You what?! You said you were going home." Tay told me obviously not happy.

"I'm home now. I'm okay." I said assuring them.

Pim sighed and started fixing her stuff.

"Don't do that again P'Gun." Pim said and walked upstairs. I must've worried her big time. I'll just make it up to her.

"What happened to you?" Tay asked me.

"I just needed time to think." I said.

"You sure?" Tay asked still worried

"Yes, why?" I asked back.

"You were headed for the liquor shelf. What problems are you drinking away again?" Tay asked.

"Just life Tay, I guess I really am just tired." I told him.

"I won't be drinking anymore, I need to get you home again." I said.

"No. I'm staying here, I have clothes" He said holding up his backpack.

"How did you get here?" I asked him when I realized how late it was.

"New drove me, I bugged him as well haha" He said and smiled at me.

I took a glass for my self and poured bourbon.

"You want some?" I asked Tay.

"Sure." He said seating on the bar stool we have.

I sat beside him after I poured him a drink...

"You coming to New York or not?" I asked him.

"You really did purchased tickets?" Tay asked.

"Yeah." I told him.

"When are we leaving then?" He asked while sipping from his bourbon.

"A week after the studio opening, we don't have a project for that week, it's just open for bookings, I'm sure some staff and the two could handle that. It's only a week of vacation anyway." I told him.

He was contemplating the information I just told him... I know he wants too...

"I'll give you time to think. No pressure" I said.

"No pressure, we're barely two weeks away from opening" He said and hit me lightly on the shoulder.

"Just saying..." I said.

Days flew fast, we're now  less than a week before the studio opening. Off has been showing up to meetings but he has been so cold to me and he has been avoiding me? We barely even talk but I know I was falling deeper. I smile every time he talks to me, it makes me happy that he interacts with me even for just seconds.

Off was like a complete stranger to us. He has been talking to New a lot but he has been avoiding me and Tay, he does talk to Tay but he barely does unlike to New. I don't know what we've done but it seems like he's hiding something from us.

"Tomorrow's meeting, can I bring Mild? She wants to see." Off said while we're in the meeting room.

"What for? It's not even done yet" Tay asked.

"I just wanna bring her along, we're also having dinner, she has nowhere to go while she waits for me." Off said.

I stood up and took some papers with me to keep in the company folder. Are they even dating already?

Weeks went like that until it was two days before the opening. We all have been spending so much time together because of the studio opening. We're making sure everything will go well. There are also projects booked already two weeks after the opening, just in time when I go back from New York.

The weeks with Off being cold and acting like a different person was difficult. It feels like I've lost a friend and all, did he knew I liked him? There were a lot of rumors that he is already dating Mild. As much as I don't wanna mind it, he's always everywhere. His fans kept asking about him at the coffee shop, they mention me on social medias. They always ask me as his friend but I don't really respond to any of it.

If he's gonna be this cold, please take my feelings away.

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Thanks for reading! <3