Toxic

Amara

It's been a few months since everything happened and me and Ryder had decided to move in together. He promised me that he would stop doing all that dangerous stuff, even though I told him that I don't want to pressure him into doing that. I did appreciate what he did for me, it made feel more comfortable because deep down, I didn't feel okay with the fact that he was involved in illegal business.

We found an apartment somewhere new. Ryder said he wanted a fresh start because a lot of people from his dangerous "past" knew where he lived. Today we were finally moving in together.

"It seems kind of empty" Ryder said, "How about we go get decorations?"

"Maybe tomorrow, I'm tired" and sat on the couch. We had some furniture but it did seem pretty empty. I didn't mind though. It didn't matter to me at all.

"Come here" He said after sitting down beside me and patted his lap.

I smiled and sat on his lap melting into his arms.

"How do you feel?" He asked.

"This is new to me, you know?" I said looking up at him.

"Amara you were about to get married a few months ago"

I rolled my eyes, "This has nothing to do with that"

"How so?" He asked raising an eyebrow.

"Well first of all, I actually want to be with you" I started as I moved my arms around his neck and played with the back of his hair and felt his whole body relax.

"I have never been so glad to kidnap a girl before" He said with a smirk.

"You have kidnapped other girls!?" I asked not believing my own ears.

I wasn't jealous, I was just worried for the girls.

He let out a deep chuckle and kissed my cheek lingering there for a few seconds, "Of course not. I didn't care enough to do that"

"Yeah, now we're together all thanks to your jealousy"

"I didn't know it was jealousy at that time and also it wasn't just jealousy" He said as his fingers brushed through my hair, "I didn't want you to marry someone you didn't want. I didn't want you to be unhappy"

"How did you know I didn't want Jason?" I asked.

Jason was a good guy and I was glad he was okay now. He was in another city and had started a new life.

"Because only I can make you happy, stupid" He smirked.

That's so toxic I love it.

"Don't call me stupid-"

He interrupted me by holding my face and putting his lips on mine. I tried to move away, but he wouldn't let me, deep down I didn't wanted him to either and eventually, I just accepted it and kissed him back.

He slightly pulled away but our lips were still brushing against each other.

"You thought I'd let someone else have my girl? I was and still am too attached to you to ever see you with any other guy"

"Even after so many years of being away from me?"

He sighed and leaned his forehead on mine, "I missed you like crazy every second of the day, Amara. I had to keep myself from coming back every four hours the first months"

I smiled lightly at his words. I never thought about how it must have been for him. All these years I thought that he didn't even think of me once. I thought I meant nothing to him at that point.

"I never knew I would fall in love with you, I just liked your presence. I loved the thought of keeping you safe and hated the thought of being away from you"

I wrapped my arms around him and closed my eyes hugging him, "Don't ever leave again"

"No way I'm ever doing that again. I can't stay away from you" He chuckled. He cupped my face and made me look at him, "I love you, get that through your head"

"You are so sappy" I smiled.

"Shut up" He said rolling his eyes and trying to hide his smile.

"I never said I don't like it"

"I don't care, now let's go to bed. We have some decorations to get tomorrow" He said and stood up still holding me up with his hands on the back of my thighs.

"Are we sleeping in the same bed?" I asked.

"Oh I don't know? Are we?" He said with a smirk, suddenly he stopped moving, "No but, if you feel uncomfortable with that I can just sleep on the couch, or the floor, or-"

"Ryder!" I exclaimed laughing, "Of course I feel comfortable with you"

He gave me a bright smile, he looked so proud and happy, he was adorable sometimes.

He led us to the bedroom and out me down on the bed softly.

The room was pretty empty for now, but hopefully we'd be able to fix that. I didn't care though. Nothing was "empty" when he was in there.

He turned off the lights and lied down next to me.

"Can I hold you?" He asked.

"Of course" I chuckled as he put his hands around my waist and nuzzled in my neck.

"Goodnight, love" He whispered.

"Night-night sleeping beauty" I said with a smik.

"Jealous because of my beauty?" He asked.

I stayed silent for a few seconds, "I think you're way too tired. Go to sleep"

He chuckled, "I love you"

His voice was already husky and quiet as he was drifting off to sleep.

I smiled at the thought of our new life together, "I love you" I whispered, even though I knew he was probably already asleep by now, but I hoped he could hear me.

_________

"I hate this table" Gordon said.

I immediately glared at him and he cleared his throat.

"Just kidding it's nice" He said.

"You guys did such a good job with decorations and stuff" Mary said.

We had invited them over to see our apartment now that it was basically all done.

Gordon was such a coward he still hadn't admitted his feelings for Mary. They were always together, they basically lived together now. Gordon was still claiming that they were just "best friends". I hated that, but I didn't want to be in his business.

Maybe he needs more time.

"Hey Amara, can I talk to you for a second?" Gordon said, "Alone?"

I looked at Ryder who was frowning at Gordon and then Mary who also seemed confused.

"Um sure" I said and led him to our room, "What is it?" I said and closed the door.

"Remember how you always asked me if I have feelings for Mary?" He asked.

Oh God.

"Yes" I said and crossed my arms.

"Well, I do"

I wasn't surprised actually, but I couldn't help but be happy for him that he had finally admitted it.

"Thats great! I'm so glad you finally admitted it! Now you just have to tell her"

"Yeah-" He said hesitating a bit, "I don't think she feels the same"

"She's literally living with you-"

"Maybe she sees me as a brother or a very good friend-"

"Oh My God, you are so dumb"

"Help me" He whined.

"Just talk to her, okay? I promise you she feels the same"

I knew because she had already told me.

After promising me that he would talk to her and after spending a little more time with them, they finally had to go home.

Me and Ryder sat on the couch together to watch TV and cuddle. I loved cuddling with him ever since I was little. This was like the old days. The only difference was we were a couple now.

"I missed this" He said and kissed the top of my head.

We hadn't really been able to rest after everything ended either. Ryder had to quit whatever he was doing which was a long process since a lot of people were mad. He had to find a job, which was still not normal for most people but less dangerous, and we just had so many things to get done and this felt so relieving. We could finally relax.

"I missed this too" I said smiling at him.

It could only get better from here.