Body Language

Ryder

I sat at my desk holding raking my fingers through my hair.

I could still feel my lips tingling from the kiss even after hours. I didn't even know why I did it. I didn't know why I wanted to and still wanted to do it now.

I probably ruined our relationship.

I didn't regret in the slightest. It was all worth it, but I wanted more. More than just a kiss.

My phone rang and I picked it up without looking at the caller ID.

"Ryder" I heard an eerie voice.

It was Jason's father.

As if I haven't enough stuff on my mind right now.

"What do you want?" I asked, my voice hoarse.

I hadn't spoken a word ever since I left the house.

"Why so rude?" He asked before letting out a quiet chuckle.

"Because you won't leave me alone" I groaned and ran my fingers through my hair.

"Because I enjoy your company a lot. Didn't Irene teach you to respect older people?"

Irene. My mother.

"Don't ever talk about my mother again" I growled.

"Why not? I quite like her. Maybe if your dad wasn't in the way-"

"Shut up!" I yelled.

"You're right, you're right. Maybe talking about your mother is too far. She's not who I want after all. Amara is who I want. Me and my son both"

That was even worse.

"Don't you dare talk about her like this and I told you I don't have her!" I groaned.

"Stop lying Ryder-"

I cut the call.

I cut the call and threw my phone at the wall causing it to break. I couldn't listen to him anymore, I was disgusted. Just the thought of him ever getting his hands on her disgusted me.

I dialed Gordon's number on the telephone I had on the desk.

This has to end now.

"Hey wha-"

"We're attacking them"

"Wha- who?" He asked.

"Jason and his stupid little army. I'm done, we're attacking them I don't even care"

"But Ryder-"

"Don't say another word just get the guys ready. I'll be over in a couple of hours"

I was furious with them.

How could he speak like that about my family and my girl?

She is my girl. She just hasn't realized it yet.

Today would be the end of it. If not today then that week for sure. I wasn't going to sit around and let him control my actions anymore.

________

When I opened the door to the house the first thing I noticed was Amara walking up the stairs. She was always the first thing to catch my eye.

She turned around the moment she heard the door and a smile lightened up her face before she cleared her throat and stopped herself from smiling.

I wanted to see her smile.

She walked down the stairs again and approached me.

She was wearing my hoodie. I didn't really know if she was wearing anything else underneath because the hoodie stopped above her knees. I had to keep my eyes away from her legs. I didn't want to creep her out.

Maybe this was the right moment to see her. Maybe she would give me strength or make me see things in a more rational way, but the only thing that happened was horrifying scenarios going through my head. I kept thinking of all the danger she could get in, of all the bad things that could happen to her.

She must have noticed my frustration because she frowned and studied my face.

"Ryder?" She called out waving her palm in front of my face.

"Yeah hey" I said awkwardly.

What was I supposed to tell her?

"You're acting weird what is it?" she asked.

"It's nothing-"

"It's the kiss isn't it?" She asked.

I saw some guys in the kitchen had noticed us so I shushed her.

"I knew it" She said with a bitter smile.

I sighed and took her hand in mine leading her upstairs.

"What do you want? Why are you even here?" She asked.

I got us into her room and closed the door.

"It's not about the kiss, I'm here to see Gordon" I said.

I saw her gaze drop to the floor and her whole body language changed. She started shifting her weight on one foot and then on the other.

"Oh, yeah he'll be here in five minutes" She said clasping her hands together behind her.

"Amara" I called out walking closer to her. She looked up and I noticed she was flushed, I cupped her cheek with my hand and carressed it, "You should get used to kissing me" I couldn't help but smirk.

Of course that was to see her reaction. I wouldn't kiss her if she didn't want to.

She looked up at me with her blue eyes and gasped slightly.

"You said just once"

"You didn't kiss Jason just once did you? You kissed him, why won't you kiss me?" I asked trying to stay calm at the thought.

"That wasn't even close to our kiss!" She said.

I raised an eyebrow and smirked, "So you liked it?" I asked.

She looked down again and nodded her head. It was a slight movement. I could barely notice it.

It made me feel proud and happy that she liked it. Maybe, just maybe, I could get away with doing it again. Maybe she would let me.

Just when I was about to lean closer, I heard the door open and held back the urge to curse.

"Hey" I heard Gordon's voice.

He must have been confused at our closeness because he sounded surprised.

"Did you do what I told you?" I asked turning to face him.

"Yeah we're good to go. I'll be waiting for you in the car" He said and exited the room.

"Go?" Amara asked putting her hand on my shoulder.

I turned around thinking of an excuse.

"We have something to do. We'll talk later okay?" I asked.

She frowned and crossed her arms, "Okay" She said.

I was taking a risk which could kill me. This could be the last time I was seeing her. I needed a goodbye kiss.

I leaned closer and stroked her hair, "Can I get a goodbye kiss?" I asked.

"I-I don't know" She said hesitantly and pulled away.

"It's okay" I said and pulled away as well, "How about a hug?"

"Of course" She said with a subtle smile and got on her top toes to hug me.

I hugged her tightly and kissed her forehead, "Goodbye" I said before walking out the room.

______

"What's with you and Amara?" Gordon asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You seem close. Closer than usual" He pointed out.

I kept my eyes on the road as I drove, "You're reading too much into it"

"I mean I know you care about her a lot, but if you want her to be something more just know it's dangerous-"

"First of all, no, I don't want her to be anything more she's a little kid and second, don't try to tell me something I already know. She already got herself into trouble"

"She did it to save her family-"

My hold on the wheel tightened, "Couldn't you do something about it? You left her alone-"

"It was her decision, she wouldn't listen to anyone! It's not like you were there for her either!" He yelled.

"But you're her family"

"She saw you as more of a brother than she ever saw me"

I didn't know how to feel about that. I didn't want to be her brother, I didn't want to be her friend. I wanted more.

"I admit I've been a bad brother. I wasn't there for her, but now I'm doing my best and I won't blame her for anything"

I kept silent for a minute thinking. He was right. Blaming her was really wrong of me. I had no right to judge her.

"You're right" I said.

"Okay now say the words" He said. I saw him smirk from the side of my eye.

"Shut up"

"Those aren't the words" He said.

"Fine! I'm sorry" I said.

"Good boy"

"Shut up!" I said making him laugh.