Tried so hard to be what you wanted
You couldn't have been any less of a man
To light my paper-thin heart in flames
Burn out the red to create ash grey
Wanted so bad to believe there was reason
To think destiny could defy the odds
Think that maybe my delayed gratification was divine timing
Instead of a desperate man trying to take his pants off
What a repeat of past jokes played
Put on my jester costume once more
Serenaded you with the most perfectly crafted poems
I would've given you my life had you stayed just a second more
God, I feel so stupid
Got caught up in the touch of your hands
I believed every word you were saying
I believed this was romance
And God, wasn't it so sweet how he reassured me?
God, isn't he like a sculpture made of glass?
I told all my friends you were changing me
I didn't think it would mean I would crash
Feel so ashamed I let you feel me
Was drunk so it was easy to let down my guard
I can't believe I let you in so easy
Did you know all along you'd break my heart?
What was it about my profile that made you realize
Made you KNOW I was easy to pull
What was it about me that made you realize
You wouldn't even need a bullet to have me killed
And in what moment did sex stop being a reason to pursue me?
In what moment were my stories becoming "too much"?
Was it that I didn't eat the cookies you bought me?
Or is it because there's someone that's actually good enough?
Written on: September 25, 2024