Summary: SBI get on planet and are like "Where the fuck are our kids? Why is everyone useless? Where's the human?
Philza: WHAT THE FU-
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Notes: I don't really like this chapter this actually took me longer than the others purely because I genuinely didn't know what to put, bare with me, this is not one of my best chapters. I don't think so anyways, I edited this as much as I could.
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"I'm gonna strangle Tubbo, I will, I swear I will" Wilbur gives an angered huff when he nearly trips over a root that uprooted itself out of the ground. It's been what? The 5th root? Techno gives no signs of reacting, but the way his nose twitches shows amusement.
It had to be planet For'estrx damn place was- well, a very dense forest. But Tubbo landed in the most dense part! None of the crew could figure out why Tubbo did that. The damn officer didn't believe them and had noted down that it was simply an error in the system that made them land in a different part of the planet.
Wilbur had a few choice words to say to them but unfortunately Techno and Phil stopped him from giving them a piece of his mind. Damn officers, you mention anything about species and it's all assumptions. Fucking pricks.
Phil stretched his wings out carefully, looking very tempted to start flying everywhere just to spot them. But there are strict rules on the planet, one such rule was do not do anything that could purposefully startle the animals living on planet. This includes flying, Phil is not a quiet flier.
The natives didn't hunt, especially not the wild animals, If they want to trade meat they would have livestock of animals shipped to them to start. Does that imply they have never used the animals on planet as livestock? Yes. It's almost like a religious thing with the planet, all the wild animals are sacred and only they can eat each other since they are animals.
They do however take advantage of the many fruits and herbs the planet naturally grows and offers. It's why it's so successful in the trade market, the planet grows all sorts of fruits in record time.
Now normally that would be great survival wise for Tubbo and Ranboo, But Ranboo eats meats strictly and neither boys know how to hunt properly, Ranboo lacks proper camouflage, unless he was skill enough to remain silent and still, and Tubbo is small, he would need to fly, but even his wings produce enough noise to upset the animal into a run.
It's been 3 cycles since the pod had landed, if the time frame the pod gave on planet was right. Ranboo could possibly be in critical health or would have managed to grab the rations quick enough before they crashed.
Phil trills worriedly, wanting to fly at breakneck speed and find those 2. Were they injured in the crash? Do they have shelter? Is Tubbo keeping warm?
Phil feels a hand on his shoulder and he nearly fucking squawked like a newborn Ivory. Techno rumbles out a calming growl that relaxes Phil. "We'll find them, both of them. Tubbo is smart and Ranboo is resourceful. I'm confident both of them are fine, have some faith in them"
"I do have faith in them, im just worried..." Phil let out another quiet trill, walking forwards headed to the closest town that is settled closest to the dense forest, they would be the ones best to ask about the forest and what to look out for, maybe even asking if they've seen the 2 teens.
Wilbur chuckles, trying to lighten the mood, "We know, you nearly killed all of us just to get to the ship and again to get to this planet" How their ship is still in one piece is astonishing really, blessed by the voids truly.
Phil laughs sheepishly, as if he wasn't full aware he nearly rammed their asses straight into a passing asteroid on the way here.
They walk past small creeks, not heading deep into the dense forest just yet, if they headed in they would easily get lost, so instead they trek on the border... or what they can see as the border, the density increases enough on the edge to tell.
Techno walks with confidence, his stance relaxed but his ears straight up, keeping on ear out for any possible predators or the voices of their lost crewmates. Wilbur using his sharp eyesight to scan the area, looking for clues or maybe even catch a sight of the 2 teens.
Phil itches to use his wings to help, but he'd get in trouble....
At least until they can get deep into the forest enough that nobody would be able to detect them from breaking some rules.
Or maybe they upped the security, they haven't come here in a long while. Nearly hitting his wing on a tree, they finally find the stone path that leads to a medium sized village, not too big where it could effect the local forest and not too small that they don't have business with travelers.
It's a pretty nice setup honestly, friendly locals as well, as long as your friendly in return and respect the rules. The houses were made of wood, dirt, reeds, straws and stone, just made from the materials around them to use to their advantage.
They ask around for information, getting simple answers, there's massive Arachnids that lie deep in the forest, although they say a brown one has been spotted lurking around the town recently, it never attacked them, but just kinda, stared at them.
Wilbur goes to ask people in the shops, Techno asking the guards positioned outside of the town to ask them if they've seen anything odd, Philza goes to the head of the town, whatever form of government or leader this town possess to ask questions and maybe even assistance.
They all said the best bet they had to find the teens was to find water, it's the basic survival rule, water, even if Tubbo does not need a lot of water and especially not Ranboo, it's a good landmark to start on, an elderly Floran pointed to a direction that she claims has a large body of water with a stream that's connected to it, that can be their starting point.
They thank her and she wishes them luck.
"We honestly could have just asked her the entire time, literally everyone else was useless, none of them cared or bothered to say anything different than the next person. What is it with people not giving a shit these days" Wilbur was tired of walking, he was lead on a Valrin Rat chase, a shop owner claims someone would know, then that person claims someone would know, and it was a repeated cycle of going back and forth around town for him.
"Wil, it's not like we knew she was the only one helpful, we had to ask around, and it's just how some aliens are, we are outsiders, we are none of their concern until we break a rule or law" and wasn't that the truth, outsiders who ask around and don't do the normal routine of the typical traveler who buys then leaves are seen as weird and odd aliens. Immediately seen as looking for trouble.
The only reason these people even bothered was due to the fact they were asking around for lost people and even asking about the deep forest, they helped but mainly just spouting the same information every damn time.
"So we head in this vague direction that the lady pointed us, and what? Find the lake and start where? We are literally starting from scratch" Techno bends a branch that was in his way and lets it go once he passes.
"We start now or we start too late, once we get further in we can break a couple rules in the form of having dadza- OW- FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK TECHNO!" The branch came back full swing and slapped Wilbur right on the face, he holds it in pain and Techno looks back at him, only slightly sorry.
Phil doesn't even pay attention to them, looking around the forest as they head deeper and deeper, the boys lagging behind slightly thanks to the branch.
Wilbur rubs his face, sore from the hit and noticed how much ahead Phil was. "Techno we gotta pick it up or bird brain dad is gonna ditch us in his search, honestly" Techno huffs and pulls Wilbur forwards "If you would have ducked we wouldn't have lagged behind" Wilbur screeched in his ears and Techno only barely restrained strangling him.
Back with Phil, the second he saw the lake, he spread his wings, and starts flying over the trees. Confident that Wilbur and Techno can search and take care of themselves, each of them have their own communicators on and ready.
He follows the stream upstream, he tries to watch from a birds eye view, but quickly realizes that it's literally called the dense forest for a fucking reason. So he has no choice but to fly down.
Landing, he tries to hear anything out of the ordinary, maybe talking? Buzzing from Tubbo? Maybe warbling from Ranboo. He also keeps on eye out for the potentially loose human. He believes Tubbo had a reason to have hijacked the pod to not land where authorities could have helped them.
Then there's the case of why and what are the humans motives. He's confident the human left with his boys, for what purpose though? If the human killed them then their... corpses would be in the pod, there would be blood, something to show struggling, there was blood but it was red. Neither Tubbo or Ranboo have red blood.
It's possible that they might be helping the human? Or maybe even the human is helping them. He's trying to think of all the possible options, nothing is 100%. Nobody knows a lot about humans, so this situation is a wild card, the best and worst situation could be happening and he wouldn't know it.
They could be helping the human, the human could be trying to hunt them, the human could have already killed them, the human could now be a pet- there's really a lot of stuff that none of them will have answers to until they find the 2 teens. Best case scenario is the 2 of them are fine, and no human in sight. Worst case scenario....
Let's just not think about that.
He stumbles near a creek when he hears a hiss from above. He readies his talons in case some predator tries to attack him. Above him he sees a brown Strenx arachnid. Said arachnid seems to be carrying some fish.
That... was an extremely strange sight to see, Strenxs don't fish, they are capable yes, but they really don't like water, so what in Suns is this arachnid doing with fish? It hisses at him again, then proceeds to continue crawling away, a destination in mind.
He watches it crawl away with purpose, carrying the meal it has on its back in what looks like a fish net made from spider silk. Smart.
He goes to continue searching the creek, hoping to maybe find some equipment from the boys, but something nags him in the back of his head about that arachnid. Arachnids don't carry food with them to places, unless they are bringing a gift to their mates for courtship. But never fish, it's considered a lowly food for them. That arachnid is bringing food to somewhere...
He really doesn't think it's something to search into, but he did consider it an oddity, and what harm can it to do follow the arachnid?
Feeling like he will only reach a dead end but willing to take his chances, he follows the arachnid, making sure to stay a good distance from the creature to not alert it of his presence and pursues the creature, hoping against logical odds that this spider will lead him the right way. It's an oddity, and when in doubt, follow the unnatural.
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Ranboo thinks he has definitely crossed some form of human pack bonding ritual.
Talking with Tommy- or well, "Talking" with Tommy- has been very nice, he doesn't know what he's saying but to know that he's not glaring at him and even tolerating his contact is making Ranboo very happy. He doesn't know why he felt such a need to have Tommy like him, maybe because if it wasn't for Tommy himself none of them would have escaped.
But it feels nice, and Tommy is nice company. Both of them leaning against each other watching the fire. Ranboo likes the warmth, he has no need for it but unlike other Enderians he's one of the few that actually like it and seek it. It's comforting in a way. It's like an indication of life, compared to the coldness of his home.
The warmness of a breathing living body compared to the coldness of a corpse kinda way.
He purrs quietly, content to just listen to the crackles of the fire be the only sound around them aside from the soft breathing. They all fell asleep at some point. A small nap, surrounded by each other was bound to lead to them shutting their eyes for a couple minutes. It's only natural.
When he woke up the fire was barely still alive, but definitely less alive- it's dying is what he's saying. The sky was getting brighter too. So there's that.
The planet works weirdly, it'll have this "resting" cycle where the planet will get slightly darker, usually an indication that it's going to be nighttime. But then it brightens again and continues being daytime. It's really weird and confusing for first time visitors.
He curls his tail around Tommy, not able to reach Tubbo but he thinks it won't matter when Tommy is leaned down over Tubbo like a blanket. He doesn't think humans should sleep like that, it doesn't seem very comfortable for him, much less for his neck.
He hears a familiar buzz, then a small groan. "The f'ck? Why can't... why can't I move?" Ranboo looks down and sees Tubbo awake, he's kinda just... trapped under Tommy's head, arms, chest- he's just trapped. Tommy mumbles and moves a bit, likely to get in a more comfortable position, releasing Tubbo from his human prison.
Tubbo quickly but carefully peels himself away from Tommy, who sleeps peacefully unaware that his favorite alien just left his side. Once Tubbo frees himself, he checks his wings and fur.
"It's not like he squished you much, he's pretty light honestly, is that normal for humans?" Tommy weighed lighter than he expected, not from starvation or malnutrition, from what Tubbo told him they've fed him cooked meat, enough that it would satisfy his hunger. But that they fed him twice a cycle. Maybe he needs to eat more? If that's the case then they need more fish if they want him to be at full health.
Or better yet, they get the crew to give alien-care to Tommy when they find them.
"I have no idea, I did think he'd be heavier, maybe he's just naturally that light? Or maybe I'm just that strong" He puffs himself up, making himself look bigger. Ranboo croons, amused. "I mean, you are pretty strong, so that could also be it" Tubbo nods enthusiastically.
They hear a hiss, Tubbo jumps a bit, startled. Ranboo spots a familiar Arachnid carrying some fish, he warbles happily. Shroud must have left to get food for them- well, specifically Tommy, they know who the favorite is and it hasn't even been a full cycle.
The Arachnid crawled inside the cave, crawling rapidly towards them in an uncomfortable pace that puts them at unease until Shroud was in front of them and stops, both Ranboo and Tubbo had leaned back, not really knowing what to expect from Shroud. Shroud only stares at them, then at Tommy, nudging him with a leg.
Tubbo waved an arm towards them instinctively. "No! He's sleeping and if you wake him I will actually fight you, he'll never know I beat your ass" Shroud only stared at him with a challenging look. Then slowly plopped the fish down next to the fire.
"I'm actually impressed he's bothered to get fish for us- err for Tommy, you know how Strenx spiders have a dislike for water" It's true, something about how their "hairs" reacts with the water. Not as a violent reaction like Ranboo has with water. But still uncomfortable for the Arachnid. He thinks it has something to do with the legs being hydrophobic to water
Tubbo only looks at Shroud who has decided these 2 aliens are boring and he left the cave, climbing up the side and probably went to rest on the rocks up top. "I can't believe he befriended that thing, normally they hiss and scurry away once they are satisfied with asserting their dominance against literally any damn creature or traveler"
"Maybe he mimicked back? Nobody really mimics or tries to copy a creature, unless it's a reflex to a threat" Knowing how Tommy acts though, he probably also did it back to spite Shroud. He doesn't seem the type to let someone have the upper hand on him willingly.
Tubbo giggles, and gestures to Tommy's head. He makes a scratching motion. "Speaking of Choo-mi, I learned in the cell that he fucking adores his hair being played with, but with my hooves I couldn't really scratch it. It was more like rubbing if anything. You have claws, try it! I want to see if he reacts any differently"
That sounded like a bad idea to play with a sleeping humans hair, but Tommy has already shown that he likes Ranboo, so mmmmaaaaybe he can try it.
Slowly, he carefully brings his hand down on Tommy's hair, gently scratching his scalp with his claws, worried briefly that he'd scratch him too hard on the head.
The reaction was instant, Tommy did a full body shudder, made a whimpering sound, and leaned impossibly close into Ranboos personal space that he was literally on Ranboos lap. Ranboo had a lap full of human. He has a deadly deathworlder on his lap simply because he gave him a head scratch. Tommys head leaning on his chest and his upper chest and arms on Ranboos lap while the rest of Tommy is just curled close but not in fetal position, half way.
What the fuck?
Tubbo was enjoying the sight, suppressing his laughter at seeing this side of Tommy interacting with Ranboo who looked clueless and all frozen up, the only thing moving was his hand still gently scratching at Tommy's head.
"Aww look at him! He was always the one doing it to me so it's fucking hilarious seeing him like this... and a little sad... but still kinda funny"
Tubbo continues to quietly laugh and Ranboo could literally do nothing else, he was hostage, only giving a pleading look to Tubbo to help him escape being Tommy's pillow but he only cackled at him. Ranboo shut his eyes and accepted his fate as a pillow and a head scratcher.
Neither heard a set of footsteps coming closer to the cave, if they did, they thought it was Shroud until-
"Boys?"
Their heads whip over to see that at the mouth of the cave was Philza Minecraft. They all stare at each other, silent. Neither knowing how to respond, Ranboo and Tubbo frozen and having no fucking idea how to respond to Philza on why they weren't at a local village and instead in a cave with a dying fire, some fish, and a human.
Philza didn't know what to say or do, staring at his 2 youngest crewmates, who one of them has a sleeping fucking HUMAN snoozing away on his lap.
"I- how...- what?" Phil stuttered, he honest to gods does not know how to react. Tubbo has his mouth gaping, looking like he was having a stroke and a meltdown at the same time while trying to collect his thoughts. Mouth moving, opening, closing again, then opened again, something to finally say.
"You've been replaced"
"WHAT!?"
"SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHut the fuck up!!!!"
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Notes: H A. Philza found cave with sleeping human, said human would fucking have him for dinner if he was awake.
https://twitter.com/Lone_Bloodhound/status/1493712346052710400
This is fanart from Hound! LOOK AT IT! IT'S SO NICE! LOOK AT SHROUD!
I don't know how to put links on this thing, but it's a nice fanart if ya wanna look at it!