(a/n: viv's dress for the ball in media above)
It was Saturday. The day of the ball.
All over the school, all the sixth formers were brimming with excitement. You could just see it radiating from their faces. The hallways were filled with murmurs of what to wear, when to go to the grand hall, and other such constant questions.
Kate had asked all her guy friends if they wanted to go with me to the ball, but by the time she asked, all of them already had dates. So ultimately, feeling angry at myself for being so desperate, I put my foot down and told her I'd go solo. It wasn't a big deal and I'd always have my best friends. Fifth wheeling would be a downside but it couldn't be helped. And if Archer decided to tease me for not having a date, well, he could go to hell.
During assembly, Headmaster Richards provided us with all the details about the ball. It would start sharp at 6 in the grand hall and go on till 9, after which everyone would go back to their dorms.
After classes ended at half past 2, everyone instantly went back to their dorms to start freshening up and get ready for the ball. I figured if I did some of my work till 4 I'd still have plenty of time to get ready. So I went to the study to finish it.
Unsurprisingly, Archer was absent.
By 4:15 pm, I was thankfully done with my work for the day, and so I headed to my dorm to join Kate and Angie and get ready fast. But on my way, I got stopped by Ms D'Angelo, the History teacher.
"Vivian! There you are, I've been meaning to catch up with you all day."
"Yes, Ms D'Angelo?"
"Yes, dear, did you finish making the list I asked you to?"
My face paled, but I quickly composed myself and smiled confidently at her. Fake it till you make it.
"Just a bit is left, ma'am, I'll get it ready by evening. I'll hand it over to you at the ball itself?"
Ms D'Angelo beamed. "Of course, Vivian. Thank you."
As she turned around and walked back to the staff room, I felt like sinking deep beneath the ground and burying myself there.
She'd asked me specifically to prepare a list of students for a History debate she'd conduct next week, and she wanted me to categorise each person in her class into different teams and assign a historical figure to each of them, with some context added.
And I'd completely forgotten about it.
I looked at the time. This would take at least another hour.
I was ready to cry.
I texted Angie and Kate on our group chat, telling them to get ready without me and that I'd be joining them later. They called immediately to make sure if I was okay with it and when I said it was the only option, they reluctantly agreed.
I trudged back to the study and collapsed on my chair, bringing out a fresh set of papers and a name list of all History students.
This wasn't supposed to happen. I was actually supposed to take a bit of a break tonight. Now I'm just going to be very, very late and by the time I get ready and dressed and go down to the hall, half the fun will be over and I'll just miss out on it and Kate and Angie's efforts to get me a dress and a date will be in vain and--
"Vivian?"
I spun around. Archer stood at the doorway, his brows scrunched as he looked at me.
"What are you doing here?"
"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with Angie and Kate, getting ready? Why are you still working?"
I shook my head. "Some work came up last minute. I'll join them later."
"What work?"
I frowned. Why was he so curious? "Ms D'Angelo asked me to make a list of students and assign them figures from history for a debate she'll conduct."
"And you're doing this now?" Archer paused a little and then smirked. "You forgot, didn't you?"
My cheeks burned and I glared at him. "So what? I'm human, I can forget sometimes."
"I can't even imagine what Ms D'Angelo will think if I let her know that you forgot."
My frustration was already at its peak, and Archer's taunting was not helping. I was ready to burst.
"If you're going to be such an arse about it, why don't you just get the hell out of here and leave me alone?!"
Okay, so maybe I overreacted a bit, but my mind was tipping over the edge.
Archer stilled, stunned by my reaction. After a few seconds, he said, "No, I'll stay."
"What?"
"I'll stay. Help you with this list. If we do it together it'll get over fast."
"Why would you help me? Also, won't you be keeping your date waiting then?"
Archer hesitated, and scratched the back of his neck. "I decided to go without a date this year, only with my friends. Plus, that ball is stupid and the longer I can avoid going down to the hall, the better." He gave a non-committal shrug.
I narrowed my eyes at him. That was the lamest excuse ever. But I decided not to prod him further since I had a feeling it would be going into a territory I wasn't ready to explore.
"Uh, okay. Here's what I've done so far..."
Archer and I surprisingly worked well together. There wasn't any bickering for once, and we completed the work in another hour. I looked at the time. It was half past five. I'd be at least half an hour late to the ball.
I hesitated when I saw Archer clearing his things. "Uh, thank you for helping out. You didn't have to."
He glanced at me with a strange gaze for a fleeting second. Then he looked away, murmuring "Not a big deal. I only did it to kill some time."
"You'll still be at the ball by 6, though, since you won't take more than half an hour to get ready, right?"
Archer looked at me. "I can wait for you to get ready."
I stared at him. "What did you eat for breakfast today?"
"What?"
"No, I mean why're you acting so weird? Normally you'd never wait for me like this, or even help me with this paperwork. What's the matter with you?"
Archer's eyes flashed. He glared at me. "Why do you assume something's wrong with me? I offer to do one nice thing out of some pity and here you are, being rude and ungrateful."
"What did you say? Out of pity? I didn't ask for your help, you wanker! You were the one who decided to spend extra time here! And I'm being ungrateful?! Really? Why don't you just shove that comment up your--"
I didn't get to finish my heated argument because Archer covered my mouth with his hand.
"Okay, okay enough. You're just wasting more and more time like this. Now go to your dorm and change quickly."
I glared at him one last time, then shoved past him in my anger and rushed to my dorm to get ready.
I freshened up, then put on my blue slip dress. I didn't have Kate or Angie to help with my hair or makeup so I managed as best as I could. I applied some powder, did a smoky eye, and put on nude lipstick. Then I decided to leave my hair down and just brushed it thoroughly to make it look less of I-just-came-from-the-zoo and more of I-have-a-fancy-ball-to-attend.
All this took nearly an hour, after which I started walking towards the study. Archer had been texting me incessantly to meet him fast, since he was ready and waiting. I have to admit, his behaviour was putting me off today. It was very unlike him to say the least. Why would he help me out and wait for me to get dressed? He could just leave me out here and proceed with the ball. Why offer to help at all?
And not to mention, I felt really strange about going down to the hall together with him. That was something you'd do with your date or even a friend, but not with your ex who hated your guts. Of course we'd separate once we reached the hall but still, going there together brought a peculiar feeling in the pit of my stomach that I couldn't quite name.
My heels clicked against the hardwood floor as I reached the study, and saw Archer leaning against the door frame.
I saw him before he spotted me, and instantly took in a sharp breath.
He looked... well, let's not beat about the bush, he looked good.
Who are you kidding, Viv? He looks gorgeous.
He was wearing a white shirt and a black tux, with a thin black tie. His dark hair was brushed back and he wore a watch, probably a Cartier, on his left hand.
Ugh.
His eyes finally landed on me, and for a fraction of a second, I thought they widened, but it could just be my imagination.
I walked up to him and looked into his eyes. "I'm ready."
He stared right back. "I can see that."
Somehow, that comment, coupled with the way his golden-brown eyes were burning into mine, made my insides twist. This wasn't right.
To get rid of the sudden crackling tension, I cleared my throat. "Uh, we should get going then. It's late already."
He looked away. "Yeah, let's go."
We walked down the winding stairs together, and I started wondering what it'd feel like if we were a couple even now. How would we walk down these same stairs, wearing these same clothes? Would we have taken a detour, just to kiss? Would we have held hands tight, promising to never let go?
My mind swirled with these thoughts, involuntarily going back to the good old days, when there wasn't such a painful, glaring distance between us, between our hands and our mouths and our hearts.
What the bloody hell, what are you even thinking, Viv?! Snap right out of it!
I noticed Archer waking stiffly beside me, and realised I was doing the same. I sighed.
At last we reached the main hall, which was literally the epitome of grandeur. Built two centuries ago, it boasted of Victorian decor and vintage furniture, along with a huge crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling. The whole room had been lit beautifully for the ball.
I realised how it might seem if Archer and I entered together, so the moment we neared the hall, I left him and rushed inside, not looking back.
When I noticed the fleeting look of hurt on his face, I realised that it was a bad move on my part, probably aligning with his claim that I was ungrateful, but it was already too late to go back. Plus, could you blame me? What would everyone think if they saw us entering together, like a couple?
I went inside and looked around for my friends, before finding them dancing in the centre of the hall. They saw me and broke out into huge grins.
"Viv! Finally! You look gorgeous!"
"Viv, thank god you came, Katie's been driving me crazy."
I laughed as Katie glared at Angie, while Dean chuckled. He really was a great guy, and I could see him and Kate becoming a couple soon.
I danced with them for a while, also conversing with Kevin, Angie's date. He was a sweet lad, but Angie and he seemed to be platonic. She had never really had any serious boyfriend in her life, just a couple of summer flings.
As I danced with Kevin, I noticed Archer standing with his friends at one end of the dance area. Jack, Phil, Joe, Edwin and a few other guys were with him, talking and laughing. But his eyes, strangely, were already on me.
As I met his gaze, he quickly looked away, though I could still see his glare from across the room.
Guilt kept on gnawing at the bottom of my stomach. I knew I should've thanked him for waiting for me, instead of leaving him abruptly outside the hall, but I didn't have any other choice.
And yet, the guilt never went away. So I decided to do something I'd never even imagine doing before.
Kate and Angie were preoccupied with their respective dates so I figured they wouldn't miss me if I was absent for a few minutes.
I walked over to where Archer was standing. "Hey."
His gaze was hard, unflinching. "What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be with your friends?"
I closed my eyes for a second. "About that. I'm sorry for leaving you like that outside the hall. I shouldn't have, after you waited for me and helped me out today. So I'm sorry."
He looked at me. "It doesn't matter, Vivian. I don't care."
But something in his tone said he did care, and the way he said my name, so coldly, made me utter something I'd definitely regret later.
"Dance with me?"
He looked at me incredulously. "Have you gone bollocks?"
"I mean it. Consider it a thank you, from my end."
"I don't need your thanks."
I swallowed my hurt. "Okay, then. Whatever."
I turned to walk away when he said, "Wait."
"One dance."
I cracked a smile. The corners of his lips lifted up slightly too, or maybe it was just me.
At that point, I didn't really care what others would think if they saw us dancing. Everyone was preoccupied with their respective dates, and even if they did notice Archer and I, I didn't think about what they'd say. I just somehow focused on the present.
His hand rested gently on my waist as he held mine with the other. My breath hitched. He hadn't really touched me like this ever since we broke up.
I realised what I hated most about him wasn't his behaviour or attitude. What I hated most, what angered me the most was how he could still affect me with his proximity even when we resented each other. It was inexplicable, and plain unfair.
We danced to the beat of the song, and I was acutely aware of his warm fingers on my back. This wasn't right, what I was feeling wasn't right. It's just your teenage hormones, Viv, that's it. Nothing else.
Nothing else.
After barely a minute, his hands suddenly left me, and he took a step back. I felt strangely cold.
His eyes were dark, and hooded. "I'm sorry, I can't do this."
And with that one single sentence, he turned around and strode back to his friends, leaving me a confused, wide-eyed mess.
a/n: probably the longest chapter in the book, till now. i tried my best to bring out all their unresolved feelings into this chapter, and i hope i did it well. until the next, stay safe and strong folks! xx