Tempted by her Daddies: Chapter 58

Tamsyn stood on the top of the bluff, staring out at the crashing waves.

It was getting lighter; the sun would rise soon. Not that it would get much warmer. The island had a harsh climate which matched the towering cliffs and raging ocean.

She’d tried not to come back here. To move around, not wanting anyone to follow her.

But it was time to let go.

She couldn’t live without them. And there was no way they would want her anymore. However, she’d felt them hunting her.

Likely to bring you in to punish you for what you’ve done.

She’d come here to say goodbye to her friends. The last few days, they’d fussed over her, trying to feed her, horrified over her lingering bruises.

But she was mostly healed after four weeks. She had some experience with blocking pain.

It was fitting to come back here.

Full circle.

“You best not be thinking about doing what I think you’re going to do.”

The voice startled her.

How had she not heard him?

“You move quietly for such a big guy,” she told him without turning.

She tried not to react, but this was a problem. She couldn’t go back with them. She was too cowardly to face a trial. But she also didn’t want them to see do this.

Turning, she took them in hungrily.

They looked tired. Worn and unkempt. Salem had a beard which was damn hot. Roman’s hair had grown longer and there were dark marks under his eyes.

Alexei had let his facial hair grow too. And there was so much anger in his face that it made her heart skip a beat. He was the one who had spoken and he took a step forward.

“Don’t come any closer.”

He took another step and she moved back.

“Alexei,” Salem warned.

“No,” he said. “I’m not going to listen to her. She doesn’t get a say in this. Her time to think is over.”

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I didn’t mean to hurt any of you. But I can’t go back.”

“Why not?” Roman asked. “Do you not love us anymore?”

“What? No! Of course I do. That doesn’t have anything to do with it.”

“Coming back to live with us, to be ours, doesn’t have anything to do with loving us?” Salem asked.

She ran a hand tiredly over her face. When was the last time she’d slept for more than an hour or two at a time?

“I still love you. That’s why I’m doing this.”

“That makes so much fucking sense,” Alexei said sarcastically.

So angry.

And it’s all your fault.

“I can’t face a trial,” she told them. “I’m sorry. I know I’m a coward.”

“What trial?” Salem asked.

Huh?

“For all the things that I’ve done,” she explained.

“Who said there was going to be a trial?” Roman asked her.

“I . . . what?”

“You’re not in trouble,” Salem told her.

“How?” she whispered.

“Technically, you don’t exist so Roman has managed to get you a new birth certificate and identity. We changed your surname. As far as anyone in authority knows, you were never there, and Pinky never had a child.”

Relief filled her. “But you guys know.”

“Ask us if we fucking care,” Alexei said.

Salem stared at her intently. Now that she looked closer, she could see how cold he appeared. Roman just seemed quiet. Sad.

“Why are you here if not to take me back to face a trial? I mean, shouldn’t I pay for what I did?” She turned to glance out at the ocean again. “I’m not a good person.”

“So you’re going to punish yourself? Not happening,” Alexei told her.

To her shock, he suddenly appeared next to her. She was in a bad way if he could sneak up on her. He wrapped an arm around her waist, his touch surprisingly gentle.

“You’re not leaving us. I refuse to allow it. And until you understand that you don’t get a say in what goes on.”

She didn’t fight him. Or Salem, who injected her arm with a drug. Likely a sedative.

She had no fight left.

“We’re losing her.” Alexei paced back and forth in his office.

He was so angry.

And no amount of time in the gym or the boxing ring was helping him overcome it.

Roman was sitting on the couch, staring down at his feet despondently.

And Salem felt a wave of failure go through him.

He was letting them all down and it wasn’t acceptable. They were all disintegrating.

He was the leader. He had to hold them together.

Tamsyn had been home with them for a week and she was completely closed off. She wasn’t eating, barely drank anything and spent her time in her room.

Alone.

Nope.

No more.

“I have an idea of what to do,” he said.

Both men turned to him.

“What?” Roman asked hoarsely. “If she doesn’t want to be with us, what can we do?”

“We make her. Right?” Alexei asked, slamming his first on the desk. “We don’t let her leave us.”

“Yes. We’re going to have to be a bit hard before we can be kind. But it’s for her own good.

And theirs.

“Fuck, yes. I’m in,” Alexei said.

Salem glanced over at Roman. Alexei was the easy one to convince.

“Will it bring her back to us?” Roman whispered.

“At the moment, I think it’s our only option,” he told him.

“Then I’m in. Let’s do this.”

The plate of food was placed in front of her.

It looked amazing. Filled with several of her favorite things.

Lasagna and garlic bread.

Along with a salad on the side filled with seeds and nuts and feta.

Delicious.

Someone had taken the time to put all of this together for her and she should appreciate it.

She would if she wasn’t completely drowning in a pit of despair. There was no way out.

Everything was dark and horrible.

She’d betrayed them and they could never forgive her. Why would they?

But why was she here? Why didn’t they just let her go? Why had they come after her?

Go back upstairs.

She hadn’t wanted to come downstairs. She’d wanted to stay in her room, but Alexei had picked her up and carried her downstairs and she hadn’t had the heart to fight him.

At least upstairs she could hide under the covers and try to pretend that this wasn’t her life.

That she could go back to the way things had been before.

It wasn’t possible, but she could try and fool herself into thinking it was.

“Don’t even think about moving,” Salem’s cold voice told her.

This was how it had been since they’d first found her. They all stared at her now like they didn’t know her.

Like they were waiting for the other shoe to drop.

And she understood it. Why wouldn’t they be thinking like that? Why would they keep trusting her?

However, it was hard to be on the receiving end of those stares. She hated that they gave her coldness and distrust when she’d grown used to their warmth and care.

But no less than you deserve.

In fact, you deserve far more.

Their wrath. Their anger.

Their punishment.

However with punishment came forgiveness. They’d taught her that.

And she couldn’t be punished because they couldn’t forgive her.

Why would they when she couldn’t forgive herself?

Even though she didn’t know what else she could have done. Even though she’d done the best she could to mitigate things so that they weren’t in danger. So that Pinky didn’t gain anything that he could use against them.

Even then . . . she still didn’t deserve it.

Maybe she could show them that she could be different.

Be the person they deserved.

How long would it take? A year? Two?

Ten.

But they were worth it. They were worth everything.

So she sat, but she couldn’t eat. It was physically impossible. She just knew everything would come back up as soon as it hit her stomach.

“You need to eat,” Roman told her quietly. “You haven’t been eating since you got back and you’re losing weight.”

She stared across at him. He looked so sad.

God, how she hated that.

Roman should never feel sad. And definitely not because of her.

However, she didn’t make a move to pick up the fork. They all had plates of food sitting in front of them as well, untouched.

Had they been eating? Sleeping?

They looked almost as bad as she did. Was that her fault, too?

“Eat!” Alexei slammed his fist down on the table, making her flinch and shy back.

Years of her grandpa’s volatile temper and her sperm donor’s ‘training’ and she still flinched.

She didn’t know why.

“Alexei,” Salem snapped.

Alexei stood and started to pace. Back and forth. Back and forth.

She watched him warily. Would he attack her?

What would she do if he did?

Just take it?

She wasn’t sure that she could. Her instincts might kick in and she could end up fighting back.

And she didn’t want to fight him.

Although she was pretty certain that she wouldn’t win. Alexei was built like a brick wall. And he was skilled. While she was fast, she wasn’t sure if that would work that well against him.

“Tamsyn, look at me,” Salem told her in a low, stern voice.

Tamsyn. Not baby or Little one or Pet.

Nope. Just Tamsyn.

Because that was who she was. She wasn’t theirs.

Had she become some sort of charity case? Someone they took on out of pity.

God.

She wasn’t sure what was worse. Pity or ire.

Actually, yes, she was. She hated being pitied.

She moved her gaze to Salem’s, obeying him. Because that’s how he’d trained her.

And she couldn’t seem to break that hold he had on her. That they all had.

Reaching down, she started scratching at the scab on her knee. She wasn’t sure when she’d gotten it but couldn’t seem to let it heal. Every time it itched, it felt like a reminder of what she’d done.

Of how she’d lost everything.