Chapter : 32 - Bas, mohabbat hogayi tih tumse.

Maine kabhi nahi socha tah ki mai aaj Tawaif ke khote ke saamne khadi hongi.

(I never even imagined that I would stand at the doorstep of brothel)

Because of my love. I wish the person who called me a little while ago, being absolutely intoxicated wasn't Samir.

I wish someone else had called me from his number. I wish it was a prank and Samir wasn't there at all. The person called me and said he was in the brothel? If that call was from Samir... why did he call me?

With small, hesitant steps, I went towards the door and opened it with trembling hands. My face was covered to avoid any lewd glances, but even though my face was covered, these tears wouldn't stop.

When I entered, there was a dim yellow light everywhere, and people were doing all sorts of things under the influence of intoxication.

Among all this, my eyes were only searching for that one person, hoping he wasn't there, that he wasn't in that place, that he wasn't doing things under the influence that I couldn't even bear to think about.

But all my hopes, trust, and belief were shattered in a second when I saw him sitting on a sofa right in front of my eyes. There was a girl beside him, he was completely out of it, his shirt buttons were open, his hair was disheveled, and he was drinking with them.

"Sa-Samir," my broken voice came out, with great difficulty. Sameer didn't see me. Loving him, trusting his every word, believing in him, yearning to see him, waiting for him-everything was a sin.

What a grave sin I committed by falling in love with someone who shamelessly engages in debauchery in a brothel. Oh Allah, what have I done? The tears wouldn't stop, and he didn't even care to look at me.

"Samir!" This time my voice was rough. For the first time, I said his name with such coldness. He looked at me with his half-closed eyes. I had removed the veil from my face, and then his gaze fell on my tear-filled eyes. He suddenly stood up and started coming towards me.

"Sahara," he said my name with his filthy tongue. Earlier, I used to yearn just to hear my name from his mouth, but now that very voice felt like poison to me. I stared at him without blinking.

"What are you doing here, Sahara?" he asked sternly.

"Me? What am I doing here? Souldn't I be the one asking you this question, Mr. Farsi," I retorted without answering him.

"Shut up, Sahara, let's go from here," he said, now trying to reach for my hand, but before he could touch me, I took a few steps back.

"If you even try to touch me, I'll break your one hand and place it in the other, Samir," I said, pointing towards him. My voice was filled with hatred, betrayal, pain, frustration, and much more.

Sahara," this time he called my name softly.

People around us were staring, but I was in no condition to notice their glances.

"Why, Samir? Why? Didn't I tell you that I love you? Was my love not enough for you that you are here?" I asked him, sobbing uncontrollably. My voice was broken, but my heart-its pieces were nowhere to be found.

"You said you liked me, didn't you? Then why are you here? I knew you went to clubs, smoked cigarettes, but drinking? And worse, being in a brothel? Didn't you even think of me? Forget me, didn't you even once think of your parents, Samir?"

"If not for me, you could have at least respected their love." This time, I couldn't hold myself together and fell on my knees right there in the brothel.

A piece from the glass he dropped pierced my hand, and blood started flowing from my right hand, but I couldn't even feel that pain. I had loved him, for so long, so much that even his flaws seemed endearing. But what I saw now wasn't a flaw, it was a sin.

"Jab tumhe pata hai ki mai kaisa insaan hon phir bhi kyun Sahara?" He asked, coming closer to me.

(When you know the kind of person I am, then why, Sahara?)

"Haan, jab pata hai, phir bhi Samir," I said in my broken voice.

(Yes, I know, and yet, Samir)

"Kyun?" he asked.

(Why)

"Bas, mohabbat hogayi tih tumse," I said.

( Just fell in love with you, that's why)

My tears wouldn't stop, and I began to feel a strange suffocation, as if, if I stayed there for another minute, I would surely stop breathing. Covering my face again, I left that hell, but what about the sin I committed by falling in love with that person?

Why? Why? And why? Why did all this happen to me?

Bas mohabbat hein toh ki tih maine, uski itni badi sazah kyun allah?

When I came home, there was no one to wipe my tears.

The next day is Aaliyah Khala's death anniversary. How can I bother Appi at this time?

On Khala's death anniversary, I learned the truth about Appi's nightmares, and after knowing her truth, my pain didn't seem like pain anymore.

Compared to her sorrow, mine was nothing. And my hatred for Samir grew even more. And my Appi is such a pure woman. What did she do to deserve being called impure by Abbu? All men are like this.

But then, Aziz Bhai's face comes to my mind.

-someone who can climb a pipe in the middle of the night for Appi, someone who can break a door in two pieces for her, someone who goes into prostration upon seeing her collapse. Finding such a pure person is very difficult.

I only pray that my Appi gets Aziz Bhai.

And today, seeing Appi smile made me feel relief. I didn't want to tell her anything, but when she asked if I was okay, I couldn't hold myself together. No one had asked how I was till now, and when she did, all my sorrow came pouring out at once.

Is this the same cheerful Sahara who is now sitting in front of me, crying her heart out? I never ever imagined that Sahara was going through so much pain.

Yaah Allah, how could I overlook her pain, how could I not see the sorrow hidden behind her smile, how could I not notice the sadness in her eyes? How did I miss all of this?

I hugged her tightly as soon as she said everything. Then I broke the hug while wiping her unstoppable tears.

"How can you cry for someone like Samir--

"You're talking about Samir, Uns, when your Aziz Nader is far worse than him." Some familiar voice interrupted me.

We all three turned towards the voice coming, only to see Zaki standing near the entrance of the room. HIs voice and expression seemed stern and cold.

"Watch your words, Zaki," I said sternly, but I was still puzzled by what he had just said about Aziz.

"I am just telling you the truth, Uns," Zaki said firmly while entering the room.

I stood up, and Sahara and Ezzeh stood up with me.

"Aziz Nader is not what he seems, Uns," Zaki said. "He's even worse than Samir and-"

I cut him off, "If this is some kind of joke, it's a very bad one, Zaki," I said, walking toward him.

No matter what I say to Aziz, I can't tolerate someone else talking nonsense about my Aziz-the man who broke the door into two pieces for me, the man who hates rain but still joins me in it, the man who started drinking coffee for me, the man who has only ever loved me. Am I supposed to listen to all this about him?

"Maybe you're jealous because I rejected you, so you're saying all this about Aziz. But remember, I have full trust in Aziz," I said proudly. Because I know that Aziz is a good person.

"Oh, really? You're saying this? Aziz isn't even worth trusting, Uns." He chuckled at my words and continued with more nonsense.

"Is your nonsense finished, Zaki?" I asked, ignoring his words.

Nonsense, huh? You just can't handle the truth, Uns," he said, proving his point.

"And you think I will believe your words, Zaki?" I asked, crossing my arms and standing in front of him.

"Bhai!" Ezzeh called to him to stop, but Zaki ignored her, staring deeply into my eyes.

Sahara stood beside me, placing her hand on my shoulder. I patted her hand for assurance and looked back at Zaki, who now had a serious expression.

"I know, Uns, you love him, but I am too your friend, and I can't let you destroy your life." Zaki began slowly.

"Aziz is not who you think he is. He-he's far from Allah, Uns, that person don't even know about Islam and you fell in love with him?

"Mazak kar rahe hon na Zaki?" I asked him with hope.

"Nahi", He broked my hope in seconds.

Pure silence enveloped around us and I... my heart beat stopped for the first time. I felt like I had misheard because it just couldn't be true- him being far from Allah-these things about Aziz were unbelievable.

It was hard for me to even find my voice to speak further.

"This isn't true, and next time, think a thousand times before saying such nonsense about Aziz, Zaki," I said, looking straight into his eyes without blinking.

"Brother, enough now," Ezzeh said, trying to take Zaki away by grabbing his hand.

But Zaki shook off her hand.

"I knew you wouldn't believe my words, so I want to show you, Uns," Zaki said in a firm tone.

"What do you mean?" I asked him just as sternly.

"Come and see for yourself. You'll know everything, Uns," Zaki said as he turned and started walking out.

He's lying, my Aziz is completely pure. Isn't he, Allah? I stood there, not moving, not saying anything. I didn't need to think much. I know Aziz; and my Allah isn't so unkind as to make me love someone who is unworthy, who doesn't believe in him.

''Uns?'' Ezzeh called my name, shaking my shoulder.

''Huh?'' I looked at Ezzeh and Sahara, who were standing in front of me.

''Your brother has gone mad, Ezzeh. Put him in a mental hospital,'' I said with a laugh, then went to sit on my bed.

''You're not going, Uns?'' Ezzeh asked.

''Where?'' I asked her, being confused.

''Where Bhai said,'' Ezzeh replied.

''You think I will go, Ezzeh?'' I asked her sternly.

"Your brother comes and says nonsense about Aziz without any reason, and you expect me to believe him? Are you for real, Ezzeh?'' My voice was loud yet calm.

I didn't want to shout at her because of her brother, but still, I couldn't stay calm when she thinks I should go somewhere unknown just to see what Aziz is doing?

''Uns, I'm just asking you to go. I can't believe my brother either. Mr. Aziz Nader can't be like that, but what's the harm in going once where my brother is saying?

What if it's not Aziz Nader but Samir Farsi? We can teach that shameless man a lesson for breaking our Sahara's heart."

Ezzeh was trying to reassure me, but why is my heart not agreeing to go with Zaki? One side of me wants to go and see whatever he has to show, and the other side doesn't want to step out of the room.

I have a strange fear that if I go out, I won't come back in the same state. But why is my heart so restless, suddenly?

Despite not wanting to, I found myself sitting in the back seat of Zaki's car. Sahara was next to me, and Ezzeh was sitting in the front beside Zaki.

With a sudden brake, Zaki stopped the car. Stepping outside, I looked at the sky; it was getting dark, and clouds were gathering, hinting it might rain. Then my gaze fell on the building in front of us, and I felt the ground slip from under my feet.

I had never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would be standing in this place at this time.

Zaki was walking ahead, but neither Sahara, nor I were ready to move.

A night club?

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Chapter Aesthetics :

But all my hopes, trust, and belief were shattered in a second when I saw him sitting on a sofa right in front of my eyes.

"If you even try to touch me, I'll break your one hand and place it in the other, Samir "

Bas mohabbat hogayi tih, tumse.

Then my gaze fell on the building in front of us, and I felt the ground slip from under my feet.

Night club?

🤍