56

They get coffee from a vendor at the edge of the park. Winston accepts his from Ryder--who's paying--and holds it with both his hands. Even through the mittens he can feel the warmth of the liquid in the paper cup and it is a heavenly sensation. He pulls the steam in through his nose, lets it warm his throat, and then takes the tiniest possible sip from the drink.

His tongue burns.

Surreptitiously grimacing so no-one sees it, he hides his face behind the cup and watches Ryder and Jason talking. They're barely stopped talking in a whole hour, and Winston can't even imagine doing that. Doesn't their throats hurt?

"And so Clyde nearly knocked a whole cabinet right over--" Jason is energetically explaining to his brother, one hand waving in the air and the other tightly attached to his own cup of coffee. He hasn't drunk from it once so far.

Winston takes another, much more gentle, sip form the liquid as they wander out of the park, turning left at the first cross section and walking on the sidewalk. Cars whizz by slowly, the many spots of ice littering the roads forcing them to cut their speed. Winston eyes their progress as he walks, listening to Ryder and Jason's conversation with half-an-ear.

Ryder follows them all the way back to campus, and before they head to Jason's dorm they stop by the cafeteria so Jason can show off all it's glory to his brother, and then to the library so Ryder inhale the scent of learning--and sweat, blood and tears.

Ryder lingers a little at the law books when they go past the section--"Ry's a lawyer," Jason discreetly whispers to Winston--and then they head onward to Jason's dorm.

Winston, who's been holding his empty coffee cup for about half-an-hour now, finally manages to find a trashcan to drop it in on the way over the grass section--now covered entirely by snow.

He lingers beside Jason while Jason unlocks the dorm's front door. As soon as he steps inside he's already unwrapping the scarf around his neck, pulling his mittens off and unzipping his puffy winter jacket. Exhaling, he relaxes and lets the heat wash over him.

They bumble up the stairs, Jason in the lead and Winston at the end. Jason's room is empty when they arrive; Terry having been bribed out with promises of revenge against... somebody. Winston didn't really keep up during that part. But apparently Terry is in a perpetual state of war with another art student. Or something.

Winston and Jason settle beside each other in the room sole couch, the one that faces the huge TV screen and all the gaming consoles. Ryder, meanwhile, drags over Jason's desk chair and sits on it very prim and proper, one of his legs crossed over the other. He even clasps his hands together in his lap.

Winston doesn't think he's ever seen someone sit like that outside of the TV.

But it suits him. Something about Ryder just screams refinement, and it's kind of quiet, dignified one. It's not gaudy like it so often is in shows and movies, and Winston is actually kind of envious.

He bets Ryder would be such a good cosplayer.

It's not one of Winston's talents; never have been, probably never will be. Gary isn't into at all, either, and while Winston isn't exactly hurting for money at the moment, he also can't afford to recklessly toss it away.

"You're coming to my game, right?"? Jason asks Ryder and Winston zooms right back into the conversation, perking up and looking to Jay's brother. To be quite honest, Winston probably knows significantly less about Jason's upcoming game than he should; he knows it's big and important and that it matters a lot of Jason--but he doesn't know anything beyond that.

Ryder says, "Of course, I've already booked the tickets. You don't have to worry, everything has been sorted."

"And your boss is fine with it?" Jason's eyebrows are furrowed.

"Yes," Ryder says patiently, "I have confirmed with all relevant people and system. I'll be there," he repeats, and Jason exhales. Winston pats Jason's knee and Jason relaxes, pressing his leg into the motion.

The following conversation is, honestly, beyond him. Jason and Ryder both know what they're talking about when it comes to Jason's basketball, and the games they play, and the game season and... well, more things that Winston just doesn't understand.

But Jason is excited. His motions are big, arms flailing in the air as he explains something and when Ryder asks an obviously insightful question Jason goes on a whole rant about something to do with nutrition, and Winston nods at all the right places and smiles every time Jason looks at him and hopefully his ignorance isn't a hindrance here.

It doesn't feel like it.

Because this matters to Jason, so much, and Winston might not understand, might not care about the thing for its own sake, but a Jason that is happy, passionately talking about something he loves, adores, knows to its core... that is a great thing.

And Winston doesn't need to understand in order to bask in Jason's happiness. He doesn't need to know everything to be happy for Jason, to be happy with Jason.

It matters to Jason, and that's enough.

So Winston is entirely content to fade out of the conversation; content to simply watch Ryder and Jason go back and forth, a volleying conversation that leaves him dizzy. They're animated, expressions open and fierce, hands waving back and forth, following trains of thoughts Winston doesn't even realize are related.

"What do you think, Win?" Jason asks him in the middle of the discussion, turning to face him and looking at him with such an open, honest expression that Winston can't possibly say he has no idea what's happening (even though Jason must surely know that, because he is a ware how little Winston knows about basketball).

So Winston blinks, and bullshits a little with, "There's a lot of factors to consider."

Ryder's coughs is a poor attempt to hide his laughter, shoulders shaking slightly for just the barest second--long enough for Winston's eyes to narrow suspiciously on him but nothing else, and by the time Jason looks at him Ryder has already straightened and fixed his expression into what seems to be his default; eyebrows just slightly furrowed and lips the tiniest bit down-turned.

Jason then looks back at Winston, pats him consolingly on his head and sighs out a theatrical, "It's okay, babe, I love you anyway," expression nothing but false pity. And Winston loves him so ridiculously much.

"Thank you for your benevolence," Winston snootily declares, only now running through what Jason actually said. His mind screeches to a halt--he can actually hear it.

Did Jason just—say he loves Winston?

Have they said that before?

Winston doesn't know, can suddenly not remember a single conversation they're ever had and Jason seems to realize what he said just then before his eyes widen and his head snaps to stare at Ryder, who's eyes are equally wide, and Winston's chest burns, butterflies attempting to murder the inside of his stomach, and his next breath is nothing but a gaspy mess that leaves his dry mouth aching.

Jason leans forward, grabbing onto Ryder long shirt-sleeve, squeezes out a wheezy, "I-" that doesn't go anywhere. His face is delightfully red, and Winston can't take his eyes off him.

Ryder pats Jason's hand, and Jason finally turns to look at Winston again. Jason's eyes are still wide, the color enrapturing, enchanting, and all of Winston's thoughts are for a moment sucked in, his every word lost. Jason's emotions are plain to see but--

But Jason hasn't taken his words back.

And so...

"I love you," Winston says, simply, words unadorned by anything else. Staring right at Jason's beautiful eyes, he gulps, breathless when Jason freezes and staring at him, silent.

Winston is barely aware of Ryder anymore, can't spare a shred of attention at this point. Every thought, every worry, every emotion is narrowed on Jason and Jason alone.

Jason, who's blush is so deep that Winston kind of wants to nibble on his cheeks. Just a little.