CH 18
I Was Confessed to by the Person I Was Admiring
When feeling helpless like this, itâs best to focus on something else.
So, I put all my effort into thinking about what to do about the situation that had arisen in Dorothea.
However, one worry has been lifted, which is a relief. Now that I know that Dorothea wonât be hurt if I continue to play the role of Jeremiahâs girlfriend, I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Where in the Bible does it Say to C...
But a new problem has already arisen.
Watching Dorothea, it seems that Aurelio is serious about her. Iâve heard stories of falling in love immediately after meeting someone, but this is the first time Iâve seen it happen. Moreover, the other party is a well-known libertine. If you think about it properly, the only thing to do is to tell her to stop. If she still insists, I will advise her that if she can endure having a mistress someday, then itâs fine.
Because Aurelio Caldelara is a Viscount and would make a perfect marriage partner. He seems to have a good income, and the only flaw is that heâs not faithful to women. If you can turn a blind eye to mistresses and illegitimate children, itâs fine, but Dorothea doesnât seem capable of such tricks.
Or rather, I couldnât believe that Aurelio was trying to seduce Dorothea. Not because Dorothea is unattractive. On the contrary, if she didnât have a strong personality, I think Dorothea would be somewhat attractive.
There were several other ladies invited to this mansion, and even from a womanâs perspective, there were some exceptionally beautiful women among them, including some widows. If one were used to playing around like Aurelio, they would choose women who were not averse to giving in to passion, like these women, as it would be less troublesome.
However, Dorothea had the opposite nature of such women. It should be clear after talking to her for a while. Yet, Aurelio seemed to be passionately pursuing her.
ââThere might be something going on.
I thought I shouldnât rush to a conclusion.
âWell, anyway⦠letâs observe a little more. We can get to know him while staying in this mansion, and Iâll also investigate. From the way he talked, I didnât think he was the type of person rumored about⦠Maybe heâs carrying something.â
âCarrying somethingâ¦? What do you mean?â
I didnât know what to do with Dorotheaâs anxious face. To be honest, what I just said was just a hopeful speculation. However, I was exposed to her too earnest gaze, so I said it after a preamble.
âYou know, this is just my guess, and it may not be true, but I think people who indulge in âplayingâ have some kind of emotional problem. Not everyone is like that, but they may be in despair or have to give up something⦠If he is like that, maybe he will stop his debauchery if we can solve his emotional problem.â
âAh! If thatâs the case, Iâll do whatever it takes to help him.â
âThatâs right. So, letâs make sure we know what kind of person he is now. Iâll help too, so cheer up, okay?â
âYes, Iâll try my best.â
Dorothea nodded quietly. It was a bluff, but it seemed that I was able to plant some hope. However, if he was really a true philanderer, she might get hurt.
I felt heavy-hearted.
Speaking of feeling heavy-hearted, I had to tell my aunt about this. What should I say? When I imagined my auntâs face, I suddenly remembered the conversation we had about Jeremiah.
What did my aunt say to Lord Castalde again?
As I pondered about it, his smile came to mind again, and I became confused. And then I suddenly remembered. Yes, something had been bothering me for a long time.
I was surprised by the request to play the role of his girlfriend, and I had forgotten about it.
The Jeremiah I knew and the one I saw in the past few days were too different.
In the past, during the social season, when we exchanged greetings and I watched him from afar, Jeremiah seemed like a colder and more distant person, and I had the impression that he was rather stiff.
He had a promising future and was beautiful, so he was often surrounded by young ladies and their mothers, but I remember his eyes being cold and a sneer on his lips, even though he behaved politely.
Well, I was fascinated by his harsh face.
At least, in the past few days, he has shown me an unpretentious attitude and smile that he has never shown in such situations. Above all, he seemed to despise the ladies and mothers who were making a fuss about marriage.
Thatâs why I understood that he didnât like that kind of talk. Thatâs why I easily accepted his proposal.
Of course, I thought it was acting, so I expected him to behave coldly. But he keeps paying attention to me and teasing me. Is this his true nature? And what does it mean that he is showing it to me?
My head is spinning.
âLorraineâ¦? Whatâs wrong? Your face is red. Are you tired?â
âOh, yeahâ¦maybe. There were a lot of things going on today, but Iâll rest soon. Dorothea, you get some rest too, I have one more thing to do and then Iâll go to sleep.â
ââ¦Yeah, um, Lorraine, thank you. I feel a little better after talking to you.â
âWell, thatâs good. Goodnight then.â
After holding Dorotheaâs hand, I stood up and left the room. I had to go tell my aunt, but I couldnât tell her everything.
I shook my head and tried to shake off the thoughts about Jeremiah that were occupying my mind.
ââActing as a girlfriend, acting as a girlfriend! Iâm not like the other ladies who are aiming for him, and Iâm not desperate, so Iâm sure heâll be easy to talk to. Thatâs all.
I told myself that and hurried to my auntâs place. I told her that Dorothea had fallen in love but didnât reveal that the person was Aurelio. I also didnât mention that the other person was interested. If I said something like that, I could see my aunt doing everything in her power to stop it.
âOkay, so⦠So youâre trying to find out who he is, what heâs like.â
âYes, I know there are things I can do, but⦠so please wait a little before questioning Dorothea.â
âWell, I guess that canât be helped. Oh, I know! Why donât we ask Jeremiah? He knows more about these things, and speaking of Jeremiahâs eye for women⦠Oh, I wish someone like that would appear for Dorothea soon.â
As the old lady sighed and put her hand on her cheek, I said, âWell then, Iâm tired today, so Iâll excuse myself.â and quickly returned to the room where Dorothea was.
I donât want to think about Jeremiah too much right now.
My head is already confused, and I feel like Iâm going to collapse from heatstroke.
Iâm not good at thinking in the first place, so I sighed.
I wonder if I was too hasty. As I listened carefully, I could hear Dorotheaâs breathing. It seems sheâs already asleep. Relieved by that fact, I called a maid to help me change and prepare for bed, and finally lay down.
As I rested my head on the pillow and closed my eyes, I quickly felt sleepy, probably because I was tired.
However, Jeremiah appeared in my dreams repeatedly. In the dream, in a rose garden that had just bloomed beautifully, he said to me with a happy expression, âI finally found my true love. Thank you for everything so far, I want you to continue being a good friend.â
I laughed and watched him and his real girlfriend standing side by side, saying, âWhat a picturesque scene. I wish I had the heart of an artist to capture it.â But then I realized that salty tears were coming out of my eyes and was confused by my own reaction. There was no reason for me to cryâ¦
Even though the scene changed, similar scenes continued to play out.
In the end, I couldnât sleep well and the fatigue remained until the next day.