Chapter 4

Rhainne Jhammira Alethea Lopez

I was walking down the hallway, the quiet hallway of the school around me, when I heard it again—my name, shouted over and over. "Hey! Ali! Ali! Ali!" It felt like I couldn’t escape it, like the sound was coming from all directions, bouncing off the walls, each call scraping against my nerves. The more she shouted, the more it took away my   patience. This wasn’t the first time. It’s been happening for weeks now—her relentless voice, always just behind me, always too loud, too demanding.

My fists clenched at my sides. The urge to turn around and snap, to tell her to shut up, to make her stop was almost overwhelming.

I could feel my heart racing, the frustration rising up inside me like a tidal wave. I didn't want to be like this. I didn’t want to be angry. But how many times could a person endure this? How many times could you be trapped in someone else's noise before you snapped?

The thought of just turning around, walking straight up to her, and telling her to "please just stop" was so tempting... but I bit my tongue, my nails digging into my palms, trying to keep the storm inside from breaking loose.

My patience is being tested by her again.

"If you're going to ask me to get you home. Back off" I said at nag lakad na deretso at nilagpasan ito

Ramdam ko naman ang pagsunod nito kaya napabuntong hininga na lamang ako.

Can I have a peaceful day? Kahit isang araw lang please.

"Why are you being like this Ali? It feels like the, the Ali we know are gone? Ano bang nangyayari sayo? Tell me please nahihirapan akong intindihin ka. Ipaintindi mo naman sakin, diba kambal tayo? Diba you promised me that no matter how hard life is you'll always be here, asan na yung promise mo na we will say everything to each other? "- mahaba niyang turan kaya napatigil ako

The nerve of her to say that! She didn't even know what I've been through yet her she is commanding me.

Mabuti nalang at wala ng masyadong tao, siguro dahil kanina pa umuwi ang mga to.

"Damn it Yana stop pestering me. That promise was gone. Promise are made to be broken. Forget it already gosh we were young back then we don't know what we're saying. " I said saka ito tinalikuran muli.

I heard footsteps. Hindi pa ba siya tapos?

"Go away Rhianna. I'm tire of you already. Paubos na rin ang pasensya ko sayo" diin kong sabi dito pero hindi ito sumagot hanggang sa makarating akong parking lot.

Can't she just stay away from me?

"Are you relax now?" that voice.

All this time I thought it was Yana.

I turned around to face her. There she is, those eyes.

"Going home?

"Obviously"

I open the door of my car and get in. Onti onti ko itong pinaandar hanggang sa mawala sa paningin ko ang unibersidad.

___________

I was here sitting in the living room when my phone vibrates. Agad ko itong binuksan at bumungad saakin ang mga chats ng mga kaibigan ko

Bitches 💅🏼

Rayla: @everyone Girlllll, I have good news

Amrielle: Whut?

Jenaiah: ??

Say it already rayla:

Rayla: Uuwi ako diyan ulaannnnn

Amrielle: What?? Bakit hindi ka nag sasabe?

Jenaiah: wala pang one month sa Pilipinas si Lead sumunod ka na agad

Rayla: you can sunod, you have your own money guys

Have you gone mad?:

You're crazy as fvck rayla:

You can't follow me here, dumbitch:

Rayla: chill ulan may iniwan naman akong trusted natin and Ulan come on hindi mo ba ako namiss?

Amrielle: lagot kay lead, lead sama rin ako

Rayla: stop staying in your monochrome life Ulan. Come on wala kang magagawa cause I already booked at flight, just expect me to see you in your doorway

Jenaiah: wait for me mag impake lang ako. I'll come too

Gosh you're all crazy:

Make sure na mapagkakatiwalaan talaga yan rayla:

I'm drained already kahit wala kayo please wag na kayong dumagdag pa:

Rayla: relax ulan, si justin yon

Rayla: mag rereport naman yon, we can visit them anytime anyways

Rayla: why? Do they always bother you?

Amrielle: fuckers nyo iiwan niyo ko dito?

Tsk. :

Amrielle: Oh well, I'll come too

May magagawa pa ba ako?. You already decide:

:

Amrielle: bye na guys mag iimpake narin ako :))))

Amrielle: see you tomorrow or maybe next day?

Rayla: because we don't want you to have a boring life.

Rayla: tsaka isa pa wala kami para pigilan ang temper mo so I decided na sumunod sayo

Bye. Nandito na siya:

Rayla: what?! Sinong siya?

Older sis:

Rayla: No way! Impossible. Knowing you, you won't agree with that!

And Knowing me, I didn't make anything as a joke. So, see you here.:

At sinarado ko na ang phone ko. Gosh gugulo lalo ang buhay ko pag dumating yung tatlong yon.

Pero anong magagawa ko masaya naman sila kasama. Sila na ang naging sandalan ko 10 years ago hanggang ngayon. Biruin mo yon 10 years ko na silang kilala, kasabay ko na silang tumanda and they know me very well. Kung may dapat na pag tanungan tungkol saakin silang tatlo iyon.

They know even the most not important things in my life.

Kahit saan ako mag punta lagi talagang naiisipan ng mga yong sumunod sakin. They treat me like a sister anyway aarte pa ba ako

"Yana said that you walked out. She wants to see you again and she wants me to bring her here but knowing you, you wouldn't like it" tinignan ko ito at kitang kita ko ang pagmamakaawa sa mata niya

No. No way.

"Tsk."- I said at umalis na sa kinauupuan ko

"You don't have any plan to get close to her?"- dagdag niya pa

" I don't. So stop it" tuluyan na akong umakyat leaving her in wonders.

If you all just only knew why I did this—why did I have to push you all away when I wanted the opposite.

While drowning in my thoughts again my phone rang.

:apo, how are---

Hindi nya na natuloy ang sasabihin niya ng putulin ko ito

:What do you think?

It's getting heavier day by day.

:Sorry my dear but you have to be there. Forget about everything that hurt you. Just be happy there, marami kang malalaman at matututunan diyan and besides kapalit niyan ang pagpasok mo sa Empire hindi ba? Enjoy it with them, open your heart lower your walls. If you don't trust them then trust me.

Lower your walls. Ilang beses na iyang sinabe saakin ni Zhera pero hirap na hirap parin akong pagkatiwalaan ang salitang iyan.

: Empire.

: that's your home and I'll use everything to make you stay there.

Impossible! This old man! I can't beat him in his own game as always.

: Playing that game again huh

: And you don't have a choice but to play with me

His voice was firm. Being dominant was visible in his voice.

Ilang beses niya na ba akong tinrap sa gantong sitwasyon.

: As always

I'll beat you this time.

: when I got there. We'll be having dinner with them. Be prepared

I stopped for a second.

What's his plan?

I heard him laugh dahil hindi ko na ito sinagot pa

: And I've heard that your friends are coming. How wonderful is that Rhainne?

: they're playing with me.

Sagot ko sakanya kaya muli nanaman itong tumawa.

: And you all know that in this game only me can win but this time both of us can have benefit.

: what would it be? Another 3 years being imprisoned of the trauma?

And this time ako naman ang tumawa, sarcastically.

: that's not it Rhainne. I'll hung up now. See you soon my dearest apo

"Ali"  tawag ng kung sino habang kumakatok sa pinto ng kwarto ko

Agad akong tumayo para buksan ang pinto ng kwarto ko. Bumungad naman saakin ang babaeng kasama ko nga pala sa bahay na to.

"The food is ready let's eat" then again flashes a smile

She'll get tired of me, I'm sure about it.

I nodded and follow her

Pagkarating namin ay agad naman akong umupo. I was about to get my food when someone already put something on my plate, pagtingin ko dito it was her.

When will they stop pestering me for god sake!

Tinignan ko naman si Nanang as if I was asking what is she doing but Nanang just shrugged and sign me to eat.

Nanang siya ang nag alaga saakin simula nung umalis ako sa bansang—or simula nung paalisin ako.

Tahimik lamang kaming kumakain, just what I expected. Natapos ang dinner ng mapayapa agad naman akong umakyat sa kwarto ko para mag ayos dahil nga ako'y aalis.

Agad naman ako dumiretso sa cr at naligo.

I just wear a black fitted shirt, a black wideleg pants and a black highcut shoes. Simple isn't it, hindi nako nag make up I just wear my maroon liptint and that's all ready to go. I grab my leather jacket at nasa bulsa non ang phone ko at car key

Lumabas na ako at naabutan ko siya sa living room na nanonood.

"Where are you going?" tanong nito habang nakatingin saakin na tila sinusuri ang kasuotan ko. Alam kong wiwirduhan siya sa suot ko.

"Somewhere" walang kabuhay buhay na sagot ko sakanya.

"And hindi ka nag papaalam?" she said. Why are she acting like I need to?.Nung nasa ibang bansa ako hindi naman ako nag papaalam eh. I just do whatever I want to do without someone asking.

"Do I need to?" And just like that she have no words to utter anymore. Another emotion flashed in her eyes and I know that emotion dahil yun ang kadalasang lumalabas sa mata niya tuwing may tagpong ganito.

Pain.

Agad akong lumabas without even saying a word to her. I just can't stand those stare, as if she want to say something but chooses to stay quiet.

Nag drive lang ako hanggang sa makarating ako sa destinasyon. Pag ka baba ko ay agad ko naman sinuot ang maskara na kalating muka at ang isang mata ko ang nakikita.

"BR nandito ka na pala " - bungad sakin ng kung sino.

I look at him. He still looked the same since I last saw him. Nagbago lang ang pananamit niya pero parehong pareho parin siya ng dati.

I stared at him for a minute. Another one of those people—always so cheerful, always so loud, always so… makulit. How do they manage to smile through everything? Is it even real? Or is it just a mask they wear to hide what’s really going on inside?

"Cold ah, hindi ka parin marunong mag salita?" pag bibiro nito ng lagpasan ko siya matapos ko siyang titigan

I mentally rolled my eyes.

I miss this place. Matagal rin akong hindi nakapunta rito. It's still the same place I know. Hindi parin naman nagbabago ang itsura nito, pati narin ang mga tao sa lugar na to kasama na don si Kai na kanina pa naka-buntot sa akin at kung ano ano ang kinukwento

"If you're gonna keep annoying me, stop it. I might kill you using my favorite gun" pagbabanta ko dito kaya naman nanahimik na ito at sumunod nalang saakin.

Better. Mas okay na manahimik siya kesa patahimikin ko mismo siya.

"Yow nandito na ang UNO natin" someone said.

I didn't remember him though, pero pamilyar siya saakin. I'm familiar with what he looks like but I can't remember his name and I don't care anyway.

Nilibot ko ang tingin ko at nag kunwaring may hinahanap kahit wala naman. Just to distract myself I hate how they look at me. I wanna rip their eyes off.

"Wala pa si King kung hinahanap mo siya" sagot ni Kai as if yun talaga ang hinahanap ko.

"Oh" tanging sagot ko, what else?

Hindi ko naman talaga hinahanap si King dahil alam kong nasa ibang bansa pa ito.

"Bakit nga pala napabisita ka?"

"Oo nga akala namin nasa ibang bansa ka "

"Wait Uno are you gonna stay here? "

Sunod sunod na tanong nilang lahat. Is this some kind of interview? I bet it's not they just want to have some information.

You can't blame me if I couldn't see good interest in this people. Parang lahat sila ay may hindi magandang gagawin.

"It's all on King's decisions. I'm just following what he wants" sagot ko naman

I know they didn't feel satisfied with my answer—I can sense it. Alam nilang kahit minsan hindi ko sinusunod ang gusto ni King.

"Well mas mabuti nga namang andito ka. Para ka rin naman nang kanang kamay ni King. Tsaka ikaw rin ang pinakamagaling saaming lahat pag dating sa pakikipaglaban"

Indirectly saying that they're willing to sacrifice me huh.

I smirked at them.

If only they know what I've been through to get here. To get this strong, heartless and numb.

"So bakit napabisita ka dito?"- Kai asked me

Naupo naman ako sa chair dito sa conference room.

"Am I not allowed to?" I coldly said, nakita ko namang nagulat ito sa kung paano ko siya sagutin ng isa pang tanong

"Hindi naman. Nakakapanibago lang na nandito kana ULIT" sagot nya habang diniinan ang ulit. Tsk. It's been 3 years lang naman.

The last time I go here was with him but now I'm alone. Here we go again with those memories.

"I have rights to be here"

"Teka nga asan yung iba?" tanong nito

"The other side of the world"

Masyadong matagal na silang hindi nag papakita sa mga to at ganon rin ang tagal na hindi sila pumupunta dito kagaya ko.

It's always that night, doon rin kami huling nagpakita and I swear to myself that I'll get stronger. I'm going to take justice that I needed—that he needed.

"So nauna ka umuwi? Ano bang naiisip ni King at pinauwi niya kayo?" curiosity is visible in his voice

The usual Kai, napaka chismoso.

"Ask him."  sagot ko naman.

Parang fresh parin ang mga alala niya—namin. I was so reckless, dapat ako yon but he—he protected me at wala akong nagawa kundi ang tignan siya. They didn't want me near him. Kaya hindi niyo rin ako masisisi kung bakit takot akong may lumapit saakin. I might be the reason para mapahamak sila and I can't let that happen kaya hanggat kaya kong ipagtulakan palayo ang tao I will.

But then again, may tao paring nanatili sa tabi ko and that's my friends. Those bitches na ayaw akong iwan at hanggang dito ay sinundan ako.

"balita ko grabe daw improvement ng base natin sa ibang bansa ha. Grabe ka talaga ibang iba ka talaga. Dito ka naman mag focus Uno. Di namin ramdam yung presensya mo dito"

I did that because I have to. I needed to make sure that I'm prepared. I'm prepared in case I might meet him here. Alam kong lalaki ang may gawa sakanya noon. And if I meet him I swear I'll kill him without a hesitation. Mag kita nalang kami sa impyerno.

"Well let's see if I'm gonna stay here"- sabi ko at tumayo sa aking kinakaupuan

"Aalis kana agad?"

"This is not the last that we will see each other Kai. I have to go."

"Then welcome back again Uno. You look like you're stronger now" he happily said to me and bow

He doesn't need to though.

"I need to Kai. I'll get to them sooner." He was not shocked at all.

"You still have the same hatred, anger and raged. Sana wag kang mabulag sa mga yan. I hope you wouldn't let it consumes you. Too much of that might harm the people you loved" his voice echoes in my mind until I got home

Mali nanaman ba ako?

Is this another wrong decision?

I want justice not revenge.