29.

I'd never been happier, seeing my mom step out of a taxi and watching a wide grin spread across her face like her Christmas and her birthday came at once when she saw me.

Chiara and Dad were great people, they honestly were. But they couldn't really help me with the Atticus situation. Atticus and I had told them we were dating for a little while, and now it was over. I could tell both Chiara and Dad were concerned, but there wasn't a lot they could do about us living in the same house and being confronted with each other, even if it was over now.

Mom, on the other hand, could give me an outsider's perspective, and she could hopefully take me into her new apartment soon.

I practically leapt into my mom's arms and engulfed her in a big hug. "Hi Mom, how was your flight?" I asked.

"Whoa, a big welcome." Mom laughed while rubbing my back. "Good. Good." She looked around and raised an eyebrow at me. "Were you waiting at the hotel alone? Paul and Chiara didn't come with you?"

"Uh, yeah. I told them I could wait on my own," I said. "Atticus had to go to practice."

Judging from the corners of her mouth, Mom didn't seem to like leaving me here alone, but commented no further as we collected the key to our room and moved upstairs.

Keeping my mouth shut was difficult. I'd been difficult ever since I started dating and then broke up with Atticus, but I'd wanted to respect Atticus' privacy. Now, I just didn't want to keep the secret anymore. Dad and Chiara already knew, and it wasn't like me at all to keep secrets for long. It didn't work when I was in the closet. It didn't work when I found out Atticus liked me, and it still didn't when we dated. It was better if Mom heard it from me now.

Before the door even closed behind Mom her, I blurted: "I have a confession to make."

Mom placed her bag on the floor and released her curly hair from her messy bun. She didn't even seem surprised at what I said. It wasn't the first time I'd blurted these words to her the moment she saw me.

"And what's that?" she asked.

"You already met my boyfriend. Well, ex-boyfriend."

Mom blinked in surprise. "I have? Don't tell me: does he live in Greensboro?"

"No..." I replied, drawing out the word.

"So, he does live here?"

"Yep."

Mom laughed. "But the only people from here I've met are Chiara, Paul, and their son..." Mom's expression changed. Her jaw went slack. "Oh."

"Yep," I said again, taking a seat on the bed and pressing my hands together. "And it blew up in my face. And worse: in his face, too. He can't handle the attention and remarks we'd get if we dated publicly."

"Oh Kade, silly, what have you done this time," Mom muttered, sitting down next to me and brushing her fingers through my hair.

Brushing was a good sign, right? Unless she was only reaching for my head so she could drag me by the hair to the door and kick me out next.

"You're not... mad?" I asked carefully. "Chiara and Dad weren't, but they're worried. Especially about Atticus because he so nervous now he can't play football well."

"Mad isn't the right word." Mom sighed. "Look, there are worse things you could've done. You're... At home coming out as gay was one of the hardest things you could do. Here, you choose to date the one person you really can't have. I shouldn't be surprised, though. You always insist on finding the worst ideas and dive in head first."

"I don't do that!" I protested.

"Oh, like you didn't try out for the football team without even knowing how the game worked?" Mom sarcastically remarked. "Agreeing to deliver digital designs to the Student Council within one day while you know you couldn't have done it without my help?"

"Okay, okay," I admitted. "Sometimes I throw myself into things headfirst. But... now I'm draggin' someone else into it, too."

Mom shifted and grabbed my upper arms and looked deeply into my eyes. "Look, do you really, really like this guy?"

I took a deep breath. "Yeah."

Mom narrowed her eyes at me. "Painting, or this guy? Which do you pick?"

I groaned, making my distaste for the question known. "How could I possibly choose? If I had to give him up, I'd just be paintin' him all day."

"Okay, you can't give him up. That's what I'm hearing," Mom said.

I pouted. "But I can't ask it of him. I don't want to date in secret, but I can't make Atticus ready to have a relationship with me if he can't handle it."

"Hey, that's not the Kade I know." Mom teasingly poked me in the ribs. "No, you can't make him ready for it. But what I'm hearin' now is that he's not doing well without you, either."

"No, he's not." I sighed.

I worried I'd already ruined everything completely for Atticus, and he wouldn't be able to claw out of the hole I'd tossed him in.

"Then maybe you should talk to him about it again," Mom suggested. "Have you told him everything you told me right now?"

"Well, no, not exactly..."

I'd pretty much spelled out my feelings with the painting I'd made, but not everyone spoke an artist's language. The painting showed I was infatuated, sure, but I hadn't said everything I thought out loud. So far, I'd been going along with what Atticus wanted to protect him with little protest.

And Mom was right: that wasn't like me at all. I was an open book. I said what I thought, probably a bit too much. It usually worked out for me, strangely enough. But when it came to Atticus, I'd been doing the complete opposite lately.

I looked at Mom with renewed determination. "You know what? You're right. I ain't givin' up that easily."

A smile lit up my Mom's face. "Good. So, do what you always do." Mom gave my shoulder an encouraging squeeze. "Speak your mind."

***

"Atticus."

Atticus nearly jumped when I knocked on his open door and peeked inside. I hadn't approached him anymore at home ever since last weekend, and it clearly caught him off guard. I scratched my elbow awkwardly.

"I was hopin' we could talk."

"Not in here," Atticus replied without missing a beat, darting a nervous glance at the staircase.

I wondered why he cared, because Chiara and Dad already knew, but I went along with what he wanted: to take a walk outside. We walked to the park side by side and sat in the grass in a nearby park. A secluded place, especially since the weather was becoming colder.

"I heard Dad's maybe benchin' ya if you don't play better," I said, stuffing my hands in my hoodie to keep them warm.

Atticus took a deep breath. "I wouldn't blame him," he replied. "I've been trying to—" he stopped himself. "I thought it was a good idea to break it off, and I'd be calm if there wasn't a secret hanging over my head."

"But...?" I asked.

Atticus turned to me, face scrunched up. "Are you never worried people will call you a hillbilly or something?"

I snorted. "Because of my accent and background? No, I'm not worried about that because that's original. Never heard that one before."

"Not just because of your accent and background, Kade," Atticus quietly corrected me.

"Oh... Right, hillbillies are known for some other things they do, too."

"Yeah."

I snorted again. But Atticus wasn't amused. His face only scrunched up further to dangerously sour and sad levels. I took a deep breath. I had to be serious and speak my mind.

"I'm not worried about that because, look, no matter what I do, if people want to they'll find a reason to make fun of me," I said honestly. "I hate the thought of not doin' what I want out of fear more than being made fun of a bit."

Atticus was quiet for a moment as he seemed to process my words. "But what if that thought makes you unfocused and unable to play well for the college scouts?"

"Then we will have to do something about your nervousness. If we do that, there's no reason why we can't date."

Atticus hesitated for a moment, then shifted, turning his body towards me. "Like what?"

I darted a glance at Atticus' hands. Sensing it was alright now, I reached for them and rubbed the palms of his hand with my thumbs. "Think about it the other way around."

I slowly leaned in, giving Atticus plenty of time to move away. He didn't, instead letting his eyes fall closed. I pressed a kiss to his lips, then pulled back and muttered: "Stop people from talkin' by takin' away all the interesting secrets."