Chapter 61: Jesse

James left a little while after. He said he was getting thirsty for a beer and I raised an eyebrow for the hundredth time today but let him leave nonetheless.

A few minutes after I heard a hesitant knock. The person didn't come in until I said "Enter!". That person definitely has the most knowledge of why people have doors.

Jesse entered slowly but once he saw me leaning on the balcony like James was doing just a second ago, he ran-like a track star-to me and mushed all of my vital organs into one. Not knowing if I should reciprocate his actions, I stood there unmoving.

"I'm so sorry Lidia. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me." His plea was muffled by my hair. I immediately softened and wrapped my arms around my youngest-older brother. With his face in my hair and my face in his torso, it was safe to say that we were barely audible.

I felt little droplets on my scalp. Poor Jesse was crying. "Jesse, it's okay! It's okay! I promise! Just please don't cry!" My voice was hardly audible since it was pressed so deep in his defined stomach.

"No Lidia it's not okay. It's never okay. I'm so sorry I didn't see it before. How could I not when James slapped me? I was so naive. Please forgive me." He began to cry harder.

"But I do! I do forgive you! I love you! Never would I not love you!" I pushed him back and grabbed ahold of his face. So what I had to stand of my toes to reach it? It's the thought that matters.

"Promise me you're not mad?" He pitifully whispered. His face was mixed with sadness and regret. Why would he need to feel this way? I don't want him to feel this way.

"I promise." I whispered back and softly smiled. He smiled against my palms and leaned into my touch.

"I couldn't believe it when Zack told us. It-it was just so random. So out of the blue. It felt like I was in a movie and we just found out we were in a simulation the whole time." He explained. The way he told me how it felt was definitely different but I understood it nonetheless.

My hands fell and we hugged once again. I didn't want to let go. I wanted all his pain to become mine. He shouldn't have to suffer my burdens. I could stay in his arms forever.

Everything I had said about my brothers earlier today, well it was partly true. They still should've given me a few days or asked in a different way, but after talking to all of them, I realized that all the shit they did was their way of saying "Lidia I'll love you forever and I'm so sorry that happened to you and I hope you forgive me for not seeing it before." That's okay because if I'm being honest, if I were them I would've reacted in some sort of the same way. Not completely like them since they're all animals but close.

Jesse lifted his head and sniffed. "I think you might need to wash your hair tonight." He said, continuing to sniffle

I took his bait and said. "Are you serious? I washed it yesterday!" I bit the side of my cheek to keep from bursting out laughing.

"Did your shower consist of alcohol or was that the other guy?" He quipped, tilting his head and putting a finger to his chin.

"It was her you idiot." I said and rolled my eyes.

He smiled softly. "Oh right. So I'm guessing you won?" His curious gaze swept over me.

I scoffed. "What do you think?" How dare he asked that absurd question?

"She won?" Jesse continued to pester me.

"No you dingus, I won. Obviously," I crossed my arms whilst rolling my eyes, "How dare you think anything different?"

He mock-gasped and used his left hand to cover his mouth. "Oh my! Of course! What was I thinking? Why wouldn't you win?," We simultaneously smiled. He held up a finger to my lips as he backed up towards my bed, "I think I hear something. I-I think there's a monster under your bed. I better go jump on it so the monster will crawl out." Then he literally launched himself on my bed and began to jump.

"You are literally a maniac. I hope you know that." I giggled but joined him all the same.

"Oh my Lidia! It's really stuck under there! Jump faster!" He shouted. I giggled uncontrollably as he unbelievably jumped faster. I jumped faster but it obviously wasn't as fast as him since he was an incredible athlete.

"You are so stupid." I wheezed out. All Jesse did in response was look at me like I was the apple of his eye.

Suddenly he stopped jumping. "Lidia, do you hear that?" He looked around like he was in a movie.

"No?" I giggled. How can Jesse make someone giggle so much? It should be illegal how amazing he is at cheering someone up. No wonder all the girls fall for him.

"The monster's coming out!" He shouted and tackled me to my mattress and started to tickle me. In no way was I going to stop laughing. I was sure I was going to die from lack of oxygen to my lungs.

"Jes-Jesse stop! I can't-I can't breathe!" I gasped, trying not to die. When I die, it's going to be because of Jesse.

I felt his hand graze against my bandages. His playful demeanor abruptly ended. Instead, curious eyes squinted at me as I widened my eyes against my own will.

"Lidia, is this-is this a bandage? Lidia why do you-" his voice trailed off as he understood what they meant. He gasped as a hand flew to his mouth. "Lidia please tell me this isn't what I think it is." Tears began forming in his eyes again.

"I-I," my voice broke looking at him. Such a loving man in such a messed up family, "I wish I could." Nothing more then a whisper but Jesse felt the impact all the same.

"Oh Lidia..." Jesse sat me up and caged me in his arms for the second time today. I have never felt more safe in my life than I did right then. Being held in the arms of someone who's in the category of who you love the most just feels different than other hugs.

"Please don't be mad." I said into his shirt.

"I'm not. I could never be mad at you," after a couple of seconds he added, "but I will have to tell Luke. And it's not because I'm violating your privacy. It's so we can find someone who can provide the help we can't. Okay?"

A shrink. Yay. If people knew I went to therapy they would stare more than they already did. I would be the odd one of my class. Well more than I already am.

Nonetheless I conceded. "Okay, you can tell him, just don't-don't make a big deal of it okay?" I pulled away-as much as I didn't want to-and gazed into his eyes that were almost identical to mine.

"I promise." He he looked down at me and pushed a slight hair from my face. I softly smiled at the sweet gesture.

"We all have the same eyes don't we?" I said to break the heaviness that weighed down on us.

He snorted. "It's a White Family trait. I've done the research and all of our kids will have the eyes."

"Doesn't that go against science?" I tilted my head to the side and quizzed.

"Partially. But everyone who was born with the last name White has had our eye color. Isn't that enough proof?"

I put my finger to my chin in a mock question. "I dunno. I'm the only one who inherited the brains."

He lightly shoved me backwards as I giggled. "Oh get lost Lidia." He said but I could tell he didn't care.

We both smiled at each other. Nothing more, nothing less. Just basking in each others company. Suddenly he cradled my cheek with his right hand. I leaned into his touch almost instantly.

"You really don't know how much we love you, do you?"

Ahhhhh one of them found out!!!!! This was a super cute chapter and i absolutely loved the jumping on the bed part. I hope you enjoyed it and don't forget to vote, comment and obviously like:)