Chapter Three

ALL THE THINGS I'VE YET TO DO (2) : GO TO A JUNKYARD

Do you ever just feel immensely sad for no particular reason? It's like, a happy song plays while your phone is on shuffle, and you immediately change it to a more solemn tune. There is no specific thing that is making you feel down, but you can’t seem to snap yourself out of it.

This is my current situation.

Nothing is wrong with me, I just feel sad.

Songs that don’t usually make me feel anything suddenly have me bawling. Lyrics that I can’t even relate to, cause me to feel the exact pain that the singer feels. These moods can either last an hour or a few days.

I pop out my headphones, opting for silence that can hopefully lull me to sleep. After tossing and turning for more than a few minutes, my eyes fly open and land on my clock. The bright red numbers flash 1:32.

Knowing that it would likely be a sleepless night, I unlock my phone and press the green Facetime icon. After a few rings, Ariel answers her phone. She’s in bed, a silk scarf tied around her head.

“What’s wrong babe?” she asks, and I realize that my eyes are probably red and puffy.

“I’m bored,” I evade, “Can we do something?”

She nods, not buying my answer. Her eyes light up as she gets an idea. Instead of telling me what it is, she tells me to dress in something comfy and warm, and that she’ll be there to pick me up soon.

I pull on a tracksuit and throw my hair into a low bun, pulling the hood of my sweater up. To be honest, I look like a complete bum. Splashing some cold water on my face, I hope that I now look a bit more alive. When I get to the bottom of the stairs, I see the kitchen light on.

When I step into the room, I see my mother sitting at the table on her laptop with a mug of tea in her hand. She raises her glasses to the top of her head and looks at me with tired brown eyes.

How could we look so similar but behave so differently?

“I’m going out, I’ll be back later. If not, I’m over at Ariel’s so don’t wait up,” I say.

As I turn to leave she sighs. “Isn’t it a bit late to be leaving the house? What are you guys going to be doing?”

I do a 180 and look at her incredulously. “I literally spent the past seven months in a completely different city. You had no idea what I was doing and when I was doing it.”

“Yes, but you’re not back in Mayley right now, are you?” Knowing that it is rhetorical, I continue to stare at her. “Now, you’re under my roof. I have a right to know where you are. Are those boys going to be there?”

“I just said I’m going to be with Ariel,” I say in a low voice.

She places her glasses back on and returns her gaze to the screen before her. Just when I think the conversation is done, she says, “I’m only letting you go because I trust Ariel.”

I rush out of the room, mumbling, “I’d be going whether you let me or not.”

By the time I finally reach outside, Ariel is parked by the curb. “Did your mom give you shit?” she questions, noticing my annoyed expression.

“Of course she did. When does she not?” I grumble.

“Lucky for you,” she smiles gently, “I have the perfect outlet for all that anger.”

Although I’m confused, I don’t ask questions. I just enjoy the feeling of the late April wind flying through the window and cooling my cheeks as she drives.

At first I thought we were going to her house, but when I notice that we should have been there already, I look at the time and realize that almost fifteen minutes have passed. Still, I remain silent.

After what seems like forever, we pull up to a gate. I can see that another car is parked there, but I can’t see who is in it from this far away. Ariel drives closer to the car and parks. As soon as we stop, three doors of the other car open, and figures start climbing out.

When I get out of the car, I notice that the figures are actually my friends, but the car is one that I haven’t seen any of them drive before. We approach them and the driver’s side opens, revealing another boy.

“Man Eater,” the boy says.

“Chrissy,” I retort. Internally, I let out the longest groan ever in existence. Who decided he could come? My mood continued to plummet. “Why are we here? What is this place?”

“What did you ask us to find the other day?” asks Justice.

I rack my brain for any conversation we had that could explain why we were in the middle of nowhere at 2am. “No idea.”

Eli rolls his eyes and drapes an arm around my shoulder. “Guess you’ll have to wait and see.”

We all walk closer to the gate. Adrian pulls on it, then says, “We’re gonna have to climb.”

I think most girls would complain right about now. The fence is taller than any of us here, and the top is covered with barbed wire. That, coupled with the fact that outside was nearly pitch blak, proved that this would not be an easy feat. Though, I think you’ve realized that I’m not like other girls.

Adrenaline now pumping through my veins, the corner of my lips twitched up as I asked, “Who’s first?”

Christian stepped forward, volunteering himself. He climbs the fence with ease and is on the other side in minutes. I, of course, admired the view of his ass in his fitted joggers as he went up.

Damn, maybe I am exactly like every other girl.

I choose to go next, excited to see what is on the other side. Believe me when I say that I started off fine, but by the time I reach the top, my arms and legs are screaming at me. Needing to take a quick break, I pause at the top, and try to figure out how to get over without getting stuck on the wire.

The vision of Chrstian hopping over guides me, and soon, I’m climbing down the opposite side. When I’m just a few feet from the ground, I misplace my foot and begin to fall. Just when I begin to brace myself for the landing, it doesn’t come.

I look up at you-know-who, who is holding me bridal style. Being in such close proximity sends a cold shiver down my spine, which I try to ignore. He smirks down at me and I roll my eyes. “You can put me down now.”

“No ‘thank you’?” he feigns surprise. “You’re the mean one.”

It’s been well over a week since his sister’s party, but I still remember her warning very clearly. I smile at the memory and smack his chest playfully. “Thank you.”

“Can you two stop making out for a second and watch me to make sure I don’t fall too?” calls Ariel from the top of the fence. Her voive sounds serious but her face is clearly amused.

“He wishes he had the privilege of putting his lips anywhere near me!” I yell back.

“Harsh,” he says to me. “I’m starting to see how you got your nickname.”

“I just say it like it is, and that scares guys for some reason,” I tell him.

Before Ariel can scold us again, we step closer to the fence in case she falls. I know that she knows that if she really does drop, I will not be able to catch her. I’m mostly there for moral support.

Once everyone joins us on the same side, we begin to walk until we’re surrounded by trash, left and right. My eyes widen when I realize where we are.

“You guys!” I exclaim. “You remembered my list!”

“What list?” Chrstian asks, but I ignore him and continue to walk until we get to a little open spot that I assume is in the middle of the yard.

Eli wraps a lazy arm around my shoulder. “I told you we’d be there for the next one.”

“If I had known it would smell this bad, I would have missed this one too,” scoffs Justin. When Ariel punches him in the shoulder, he yelps, “I was joking!”

She then comes over and hugs me. “I don’t know what’s wrong, but you seemed like you could use this right now.”

“Thank you,” I whisper, truly grateful that she found a way to cheer me up.

“Well,” starts Adrian, swinging a metal bat that I never saw until now, “let’s get to wrecking.”

The first thing we find is an old television. It’s one of those ones that have a long back. It reminds me of grade school when the teacher would roll one of these in whenever the class got to watch a movie.

Simpler times.

Two of the boys carry it and place it in the middle of the space, on top of a folding table that we found. The table has a wobbly leg, so Justin piles rocks under it to even it out. Adrian hands me the bat, allowing me to take the first swing.

I breathe in deeply, everyone around me now silent. The only thing I can hear is the sound of my blood pumping in my ears. As I exhale, I swing the bat as hard as I can. The glass caves in, a few shards flying out. I hit it again. Harder. Again. I keep going until my arms are sore and tears threaten to spill down my face.

I drop the bat to the ground and take a step back.

“That was amazing,” I say, breathless.

My friends break out into a round of applause, cheering loudly. I laugh a little and begin bowing dramatically. Separating myself from the group a bit, I try to regain my composure. I watch as everyone takes turns crushing various objects.

Smashing that TV really had the desired effect and proved itself worthy to be a part of my list. I really have a great best friend; she knew exactly what I needed. That’s what’s so great about her. Rather than trying to force me to talk it out, she found a different way to help me. Sometimes when you’re upset, you don’t want to vent. You just want something to take your mind off of it. She understands me.

I continue to watch Ariel as she uses the bat to rip through an already damaged canvas. She looks carefree, strands of her dark hair sticking to her forehead. I feel a pang of sadness when I think of how she’ll handle the news at the end of the summer.

A presence next to me pulls me out of my thoughts.

“You worked up quite a sweat over there. You alright?” he asks.

When I look at him, I see no trace of his usual smirk. “Yeah, I’m good now,” I reply truthfully.

He nods and we stay and watch everyone for a bit. In front of us, Adrian and Eli are placing bets on who can cause the most damage to an old stainless steel refrigerator. My money is on Eli. He has more of a muscular athletic build, while Adrian is more lean.

“What’s this list they mentioned earlier?” he faces me, breaking the silence.

I have a short battle with myself over whether I should involve him or not. Regardless of how I feel about it, it’s clear that he’ll be around more often. Even though nothing is going to happen between us romantically, I might as well accept his friendship. He really hasn’t done anything to make me hate him or act cold towards him.

Other than be insanely attractive for no goddamn reason.

No. It’s not fair that every one of my guy friends is attractive. What about the less fortunate? The girls who have to put up with all of the ugly guys? I can’t just be selfish and keep them all to myself. Not being friends with him would be the selfless thing to do. I’d like to think that I’m giving back to the needy.

Realizing that I have been quiet for quite some time, I choose my words carefully, “It’s just a list I put together of some things I want to do before everyone goes back to school.”

Not technically a lie.

“What kind of stuff is on it?” he asks, now giving me his full attention.

I shrug. “Stick around and you’ll find out.”

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Favourite character so far??

I LOVE Justin so much! I think I have a lot planned for him, so stick around!