Chapter 12

“You have a very beautiful daughter,” Xavier said to my parents as we were seated at the dinner table with him sitting opposite me. Why tell my parents that and not me? Was he only trying for my parents? Maybe I was just judging too fast, to be fair at least he didn’t strike me as some kind of freak. But he was too happy considering the circumstances.

I did wonder for how long Xavier knew of this plan. Did he also find out recently… or maybe he knew at the hospital? Was that why he helped me? And why was he so okay with it? I had too many questions and no answers.

“So… Meredith.” Mrs. Lockwood said. “What are some of your hobbies?” She asked and to be honest, she looked too high end to accept any of my answers but what’s the point in hiding? There wasn’t anything that I could say that would please her. Wasn’t even sure why they agreed to meet knowing my reputation.

I let out a bitter laugh. “I think we all know that we aren’t here for a pep talk. So why don’t we get to the bottom of this?” I asked. My father glanced at me, warningly.

Mr. and Mrs. Lockwood didn’t look pleased with my answer as expected.

I sat up straighter and smiled.

“I like archery,” I said but it was so much more than like. It was the rush I got every time the arrow hit my aim, and even the slight disappointment when I rarely missed made me enjoy it even more.

“That’s impressive,” Mr. Lockwood said. “Are you any good?” He asked, narrowing his eyes with his lips in a thin line.

“Want to bet?” I challenged him. But of course mom didn’t like it and cleared her throat at me, I just gave her a raised eyebrow look. Did I have no place to be myself here?

“I don’t have time for pointless bets,” he said boringly.

“Why pointless?” I asked him instantly.

“You don’t actually think that you have a chance against any trained man?” he asked, laughing mockingly and looking at Xavier for support but he didn’t laugh with him. Yet he did look slightly disappointed at his father’s statement. “You don’t have a chance against me. I was trained by the greatest archer there is. There is a reason he only taught young boys and not girls. “He was so sure of himself I noticed how Xavier just watched the argument trying to catch his father’s glance to make him stop.

I took my glance at Xavier. “Do you also think women are unable to do anything better than men?” I asked him spitefully.

“Meredith!” My father warned me.

“It’s alright.” Xavier said, looking at my dad. “I think that women can do anything a man can.”

Mr. Lockwood laughed mockingly. “I apologize our son is too open-minded and oblivious,” he said, stuffing his face with tuna salad. I eyed Xavier, he looked just as miserable as I felt... Then my father... he didn’t look happy as well.

I crossed my arms in front of me. “Do you actually think that you are better than everyone or you just trying to cover up your insecurities?” he put down his fork and swallowed what was in his mouth. Only then he let the emotions show on his face.

“Listen here!” he raised his voice at me standing up.

“Don’t raise your voice at my daughter,” my dad yelled at him.

I picked up my fork and took a huge bite of the peas mom made. “This dinner is going great!” I said to Magdalena by my side but she just watched what was going on in front of us.

They were still arguing. I didn’t really listen… but it was somewhere between the lines of. “We don’t stand disrespect, we want a good wife for our son.’

I took another bite of my food. “Wow... you really outdid yourself mom,” I said out loud as she looked shocked at me. Magdalena was trying to say something to me. They were both arguing about something. Swearing at each other.

“Does anyone want some more wine?’ I asked over their yelling and looked around at the mess around. Fathers yelling, mothers worriedly trying to calm their mates, Magdalena trying to shut me up and Xavier giggling something to himself. I shrug my shoulders. “More to me.”

I poured my glass up to the top. “You said your daughter was ready to be married!” Mr. Lockwood yelled while my dad was defending me. Or lying… either way… the same thing.

“We should do this more often!” I said as loud as I could but couldn’t match up their tone. I made sure to keep my expression as cheery as I could. Sitting calm as ever.

I took a look at Xavier. “Your family is great, can’t wait to be part of it!” I told him, his mother shot me a shocked look.

Magdalena nudged my leg, I didn’t react.

“How dare you insult my family,” I managed to get back into listening to their yelling. Nonstop they were talking over one another.

“let me tell you... Christmas dinner is going to be even better,” I said at Xavier. My voice was starting to give me up. I couldn’t keep up as their shouts became louder. I was drinking my wine over their screams and fist banging on the table.

I was drowning my glass but stopped when I was disturbed when voices got quiet. I looked over and saw how red they both were. Stood up and staring at one another.

My father brushed his jacket with his hands. “I think it is best if you go,” he said to Mr. Lockwood. And he nodded, taking his wife by her hands and gesturing to Xavier.

Xavier didn’t seem bad at all, and my dad said that there were others in this pack, what if I didn’t find a better one, what if all the others would just be old pricks?

Xavier suddenly spoke from his side. “May I speak with you?” He asked me. Finally someone speaking with me and not through my father. He said it loud enough so they all knew.

All their eyes shot at us. Angrily Xavier’s father took his mate by her hand and they stormed out.

Soon after we both walked outside.

We didn’t go further than the porch but I made sure the doors were closed so they couldn’t hear us. I managed to take the half-finished wine glass with me.

I rested my back on the porch railing turned towards Xavier just watching him. Waiting… he did ask me here.

“I didn’t guess that the dinner would end so soon, I had a clue when I first entered but didn’t think so soon,” he said scratching the back of his head. “And you even dressed up so beautifully.”

“I didn’t do it for you,” I quickly said. “If it was how I wanted I would have been dressed in my usual clothes, I just don’t understand this pretend marriage when we are lying to look better but still I have a feeling we both think this is already morbid as it is. And if it was how I wanted, this dinner would have never happened. But it’s not like I had a choice.” I added the last part. Maybe too forward… but he seemed like someone to understand.

I took a sip of wine and my mind stopped on one particular though. “How long have you known?” I asked.

He nodded understandably but looked a little guilty. “For a while.” He admitted.

“That’s why you were there at the hospital?” I questioned.

“I didn’t know you were going to faint. But I thought it maybe could be an opportunity to meet you,” he leaned against the wall opposite me. “I didn’t think mentioning arranged marriage would have been a great start for our friendship.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t think it’s a good conversation topping in any case.”

I didn’t have that much wine so I wasn’t sure what made me so talkative. “You made it seem like you never found your mate…” I started.

He cut me off before I could finish. “You assumed. Didn’t want to burden you with a sob story about how I didn’t even get a year with my mate before she passed.”

He didn’t look particularly mad or sad about my question. He moved on quickly from it, changing the topic. “I wasn’t excited about this meeting either until I saw you, I didn’t know your name, but... I have seen you around, “he said.

“Well you must have heard stories about me. I am not so popular among this pack’s people.”

He chuckled to himself. “I am aware of your reputation. I think they are all full of shit.”

“Why? Don’t you think I am ungrateful and a mess and bad and reckless and...?” I spoke but he interrupted.

“You are neither of those things,” he said calmly. “But I do think that if you stay contained you will explode. You need someone to let you live, I know how it is like to be kept in obedience. I have seven brothers. When...” he cleared his throat. “When my mate died, I went back to live with my parents in their house and I lost every freedom I had, because it must be so sad to lose a mate, everyone said that and thought that. It is heartbreaking but because of that I was made to push it all away because I am a man and there is no place to be love sick puppy with broken heart, I needed to pick myself up and find a women to marry so I have a family when I grow old but no one ever seemed to be fit until you. I need someone like you,” he said and that made my lips part.

Love confession? From a man I didn’t know?

“You think I am the one for you?” I asked. He nodded. “What makes you think you are the one for me?” I asked him shocked from all this information. Or rather from finding out what he thought of me.

“I am not in love with you...” he said and I felt huge relief because he said all those nice things I almost felt he was.

“Then why are you telling me this?” I asked.

He shook his head. “Just keeping a conversation...” he chuckled. “There are not many people I can talk about my feelings with. I don’t know you, but I would like to,” he drew his hand through his blonde locks.

“Do you want to marry me?” I asked.

“I don’t love you,” he said, narrowing his eyes, but didn’t say he didn’t want to marry me.

“Good, me neither... you lost your mate nor I will ever get one.” I pointed out the obvious reason we were even here.

“Well you made great points about our unfortunate situation but...”

“We don’t have to love each other, just... be together,” I explained. “We get married, live together, if you find someone you actually love we separate if not... I will be ready to start a family with you... not now of course, but in the future...” I said but actually paused to think about it. “maybe....” I added. I don’t think I would want children out of convenience.

“Will we just be together?” He asked, lost in thoughts.

I shook my shoulders, “like friends,” I said.

I cleared my throat. “Think about it, I will not find a better husband than you...you can most possibly find a better wife than me but if there is really no one my offer is always up to stop this life of being someone else’s responsibility.” I said.

I noticed the smile Xavier had. “I don’t need to think. Why do you think I even agreed to this?” he asked. “If you wouldn’t ask me this, I would…” felt like a stone fell off my gut. “ But to make this work everyone needs to think we are... in love, at least like each other.” he added.

“I little lie never hurt anybody,” I put my hand forward. “Deal? friend?” I asked and he shook my hand back. “Deal!” We both walked back inside and they were all now staring at me.

I looked at Xavier and then back at them. “We will marry,” I said and my parents didn’t say anything but exchanged looks. Magdalene looked confused as ever.

They didn’t say anything so I decided to guide him back out. Without saying any word we awkwardly stepped back outside. “Do I need to worry?” he questioned their shock behaviors.

“I’ll work on them and you try to fix my bratty delinquent perception of me,” he laughed out at me.

“I’m not a miracle worker,” he joked.

His laugh faded out and we were both standing face to face.

“Thank you!” I said quietly.

“For what?” He asked.

“For even trying,” I said.

“I think we can be great friends.” He had a very pretty smile.

“And you look beautiful by the way.” He added before leaning away to walk to his house. “See you later, wife,” he said lastly and walked off.

I might like Xavier more than I thought I would…

I smiled down on the ground… like something dropping in my brain I remembered that Death was waiting for me…