Chapter 18:Moth's love it,You may not be able to see without,But you don't need it(Rhymes with damp)
Level Up, Felicia
Player: Felicia
Location: World 1, highschool
Victor was reading. I wondered if he was enjoying it. I leaned over to see how far heâd gotten in my diary. The page read:
Then, without warning, it turned into a lamp.
Not slowly. Not with a dramatic poof or a shower of sparklesâjust a sudden, unapologetic click and glow.
One moment, it was frog-shaped. The next, it was casting a warm, yellowish light across the desk, complete with a tiny lampshade that had appeared out of nowhere and somehow fit perfectly.
I blinked. The lamp blinked backâor maybe the light just flickered. Either way, I suddenly felt like Iâd wandered into a surreal magic show.
I half-expected it to start lecturing me on electrons⦠or perform a one-lamp light show explaining the mysteries of electricity.
Instead, it just hummed softlyâlike it was waiting for someone to plug it in or offer it a cup of tea.
In that moment, I realized two things:
One: this frog-lamp was the most interesting thing that had happened in class all year. (And yes, that includes ghost chasing.)
Two: there was absolutely no way I was getting any homework done tonight.
I poked the lamp with my pencil. It didnât hop awayâno surprise thereâbut the light flickered, almost like it was acknowledging me.
âHello,â said the lamp.
I blinked. Then blinked again.
Then I shrugged and said, ââSup.â
Leaning in, I asked, âCan you⦠talk?â
âOnly when I want to,â the lamp repliedâits voice low and unexpectedly smooth, like a late-night radio DJ with a secret.
It blinkedâor rather, its light dimmed and brightened. I decided to take that as a wink.
âAlright, frog-lamp,â I said. âWhatâs next? Got any secrets about the magic bag?â
The lamp pulsed eagerly. âOh, you have no idea. Like, itâs a real shocker.â
Pause.
âI have absolutely no clue about the magical bag.â
And just like that, science class went from disaster to mysteryâthree blinks flat.
âIâm a shapeshifting monster,â it said, the lampâs light pulsing dramaticallyâlike it was auditioning for a horror movie.
I blinked. âIâm not.â
The lamp flickered, as if trying to decide whether that was meant to be comforting.
âBut are you a monster killer?â it asked, its glow shifting with curious intensity.
âI prefer monster chaser,â I said, slinging my backpack over one shoulder with mock bravado. âI only go after the ones I have to. And calling myself a âkillerâ kind of scares the ones I befriend.â
The lamp flickered againâthis time, clearly impressed. âAh, a specialist. Selective hunting. I respect that. Keeps the energy bills down.â
I grinned. âExactly. Why fight every monster when you can just admire most of them?â
âPerfect! That means Sirius did his job,â the lamp said, voice smooth and mysterious. âI was sent by F.R.A.N.K. to ask for your helpâmonster to monster. Remember, monster killers are still a kind of monster. Usually the kind thatââ
âWhat monster do you need me to kill?â I cut in. Iâm not one for long speeches or cryptic warnings.
The lamp blinkedâalmost impressed by my bluntness. âStraight to business. I like that.â
âYeah, well,â I said, crossing my arms, âif Iâm going to chase monsters, I prefer to know if they bite, breathe fire, or just want to borrow sugar.â
The lampâyes, the lampâsmiled.
âWait. Wait. Wait,â Victor said. âThe lamp smiled? How is that even possible? That didnât seem even a little suspicious to you?â
âOh no,â I said. âI found out later that the mist shapeshifters use can create minor illusions. Science class is so boring,I had to find enjoyment, so I started researching how those illusions can form facial expressions, even when the monsters are in their faceless forms. If youâre curious about more monster facts that definitely wonât be important right now, check under Deepikaâs desk.â
He didn't. Then he started reading again:
âSo who am I going to kill?â I asked.
âOh, itâs not like that,â it said, swirling thoughtfully in the air. âBut itâs top secret. F.R.A.N.K. said I canât say anything until Iâve known you for at least a day. Orders are orders.â
I raised an eyebrow. âA whole day? Thatâs practically an eternity in monster-chasing time.â
âExactly,â it replied with a flicker of a smile. âTrust is important. Besides, Iâm not great at spoilers.â
âFair enough,â I said, folding my arms. âMaybe I can help later. Letâs build some trust first.â
I glanced toward the glowing bag, still humming with energy and mystery. âRight now, I need to check out this âmagical bag.â If it starts glowing neon and screaming, Iâd rather be nearby.â
The lamp nodded solemnly. âWise choice. First things first.â
I walked out, the lamp hopping beside me with an almost jaunty glow, as if it was ready to lead the charge into whatever weirdness awaited.
âI donât believe you, Glinda,â a student called out from across the hallway, eyes narrowed suspiciously.
We moved down the hallway, the lampâs glow softly lighting the dim corners and casting long, playful shadows on the lockers.
âJust watch, Jeremy. Anything I wish for comes out of this bag,â Glinda said, eyes sparkling with excitement and a hint of mischief.
âLucky us!â said the lamp, flickering brightly. âSheâs explaining it like you're the main character who needs to know whatâs going on!â
I gave the lamp a sideways glance. âIf thatâs true, can I wish for a week without science class?â
The lamp flickered sadly. âSorry, no refunds or wish cancellations. School policies.â
âHere,â Glinda said, flipping the bag over with a flourish. Nothing came out. She flipped it back up. She peered inside, then smiled. âNow Iâll wish for the lipstick I left at home.â
She reached in, fingers trembling slightlyâand *poof!*âthe lipstick appeared, perfectly intact and smelling suspiciously like bubblegum.
âWow. Just like magic,â Regina said, eyes wide as saucers.
The lamp hopped closer, blinking in amazement. âI didnât even know lipstick was a magic item. I thought it was just for smudging on mirrors and mysterious notes.â
Glinda grinned, twisting the cap off and giving her lips a quick swipe. âWell, if Iâm going to face the fact I have to see Felicia again, I need to look fabulous doing it.â
Regina leaned in, whispering, âCan I try?â
Glinda handed over the bag with a wink. Regina dipped her hand inâand pulled out a pair of glittery sunglasses.
The lamp flickered dramatically. âOkay, *thatâs* an upgrade. Now weâre talking style and substance.â
I shook my head. âMeanwhile, Iâm still waiting for the bag to produce something useful. Like, say, a homework-free weekend.â
The bag shimmered faintly, but no homework excuse appeared.
âI still donât believe you,â Jeremy said, arms crossed and eyebrows raised. âTry getting the new action figureâthe kid who does karate. You know, the one everyone wants.â
Glinda gave the bag a pointed look. âAlright, bag. Time to put up or shut up.â
She reached in with a dramatic flourish, fingers probing the soft fabric as if negotiating with a stubborn genie.
The bag wobbled, hummed, and thenâpop!âout flew nothing.
Jeremyâs jaw dropped. âNo way. Thatâs legit! Whereâd you get that?â
He paused. âWait, nothing came out?â
âAh,â the lamp whispered, its glow dimming slightly in a thoughtful way. âItâs a summonerâs bag. It can make things appear, but only if you already own them.â
I stared at the bag, then back at the lamp. âSo her lipstick worksâ¦â
âBut not an action figure,â the lamp added, looking stern. âBecause she doesnât actually own it.â
âSee?â Jeremy said, arms crossed smugly. âJust a trick. The bag only works when you feel like it.â
Glinda narrowed her eyes and gave the bag a pointed glare. âNope. You broke it.â
The bag sagged a little, like a deflated balloon.
The lamp sighed, its light dimming just a bit in exasperation. âHumans never take the blame for knowing nothing about magic⦠always blaming the magic instead.â
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âYeah,â Regina chimed in to Glinda's conversation, crossing her arms and tapping her foot. âJeremy broke it. Now what?â
Jeremy threw up his hands defensively. âHey, I was just observing! I didnât break anything! Itâs probably just tired.â
âRight,â Glinda snapped, narrowing her eyes at him. âLike your science skills are tired, too.â
She turned to me with a sly grin. âOh, Felicia! Want this bag?â Without waiting for an answer, she tossed it across the room like a hot potato. âA dud for a dud. Perfect match!â
I caught the bag awkwardly, nearly dropping it as if it might explodeâor worse, demand homework.
âYou shouldnât say that!â Deepika scolded, arms crossed but a smile tugging at her lips. âFeliciaâs good at everything except school. Just like me.â
I clenched my fists, grabbed the bag tightly, and said, âI wish for the sword I left at home.â
With a whoosh and a sparkle, the bag trembled and thenâta-da!âout popped a slightly dusty, but unmistakably real, sword with a glittery hilt.
The studentsâ eyes widened like someone just announced pop quizzes were canceled forever.
Regina gasped, âNo way! You actually own a sword?â
Jeremy leaned in, eyebrows raised. âThatâs⦠unexpectedly cool.â
Deepika rubbed his hands together, clearly impressed. âAlright, Felicia, you just raised the bar.â
âOh look,â I said, holding the bag up like a trophy. âI fixed it. Thanks for the gift! Iâll be playing with it while you all rot in detention.â
âOh, right,â Deepika said quickly, pointing vaguely toward where the others in the hall. âWe should⦠probably get to that. Mr. Kapany did say the consequences of leaving his classroom.â
But instead of following them, she spun on her heel and ran straight up to me, eyes wide with excitement.
âThat was AMAZING!â she half-whispered, half-screeched. âIs that one of your monster chaser abilities?! The bag, the sword, the hopping lamp?â
I blinked. âWhich part? The dramatic timing? The glowing footwear? The fact that I technically just stole a magical artifact through just standing there?â
âWait,â the lamp said, its glow flickering with alarm. âYou told a human what you are?â
I gestured grandly between them. âMonster shapeshifter, meet Deepikaâmy best, and statistically speaking, only friend. Deepika, meet the shapeshifter, who used to be a frog, is now a lamp, and occasionally sounds like heâs judging me.â
Deepika gave a polite wave to the lamp. âHi. Love your glow. Very Pixar-meets-haunted-attic.â
The lamp blinked. âIs she always like this?â
âYes,â I said.
âUnfortunately!â Deepika added at the same time.
The lamp tilted slightly, like it was re-evaluating its life choices. âWell, now two humans know. If F.R.A.N.K. finds out, Iâll be turned into a desk lamp and reassigned to a dental office.â
âHmm. Sounds bad.â Deepika said, while not looking at him. âReally, Felicia, it's outstanding that you have that bag.â
That the bullies gave me, I thought grimly, the words echoing in my head louder than I liked. My grip on the bag tightened just a little.
The lampâclearly reading the mood on my face, and possibly my soulâbrightened a few watts. âLet me cheer you up,â it said with forced enthusiasm. âI have a gift.â
âOh no,â Deepika muttered. âItâs going to be frog guts, isnât it?â
The lamp ignored her andârather impressivelyâgrew a pair of tiny glowing hands. Like, actual hands. Out of the base. It was horrifying and adorable!
The lamp extended one of its hands and placed the soft, velvet bag on the groundâopen end pressed flat against the floor. For a breath, it was still. Then, with an elegant lift of its wrist, the lamp began to raise the bag upward.
As the bag lifted, something peculiar happened. The curved tip of an umbrella emergedânot pulled from inside, but revealed, as though the floor beneath had been a window to somewhere else entirely. Bit by bit, the umbrella came into view: a polished wooden handle, a band of deep navy fabric, ribs unfolding slightly as they passed into this world. The higher the lamp lifted the bag, the more the umbrella appeared, until the umbrella stood upright on the ground, perfectly intact and far too large to have ever fit inside the bag.
The lamp paused, as if admiring its handiwork, then gently shook the bag onceâjust to be sure. Empty. Impossible, yet entirely real.
An umbrella. Not a cool one. Not a sword-disguised-as-an-umbrella or a magical babysitter(Who feeds the birds) umbrella that lets you fly.
Just a plain, sad, dollar-store umbrella.
It was taped to the floor.
We all stared at it.
âTa-da!â the lamp said proudly.
â...Itâs an umbrella,â I said.
âThereâs duct tape,â Deepika added, pointing to the haphazard job anchoring it in place. âIndustrial strength, too. Someone meant for this thing to never leave.â
âThe restraints keep it from floating away,â the lamp explained, gesturing with its tiny hands as if it had a degree in cursed umbrella engineering. âItâs cursed to float just a bit, but can grow as big as you want. The tape grows too, so it stays in place. Very advanced stuff. Ancient magic. Probably invented by a wizard who hated sudden weather.â
Well, I thought, if it wasn't for the tape, maybe it would let me fly and feed the birds.
I stared at the umbrella, which now bobbed gently up and down in the air like it was trying to remember what clouds looked like. âThanks, but⦠wouldnât that make it useless?â
The lamp blinked. âExcuse me?â
âI mean, Iâm in a hallway,â I said, gesturing around at the thoroughly ceilinged surroundings. âThereâs no weather here. No sunlight. The ceiling already is an umbrella. And now I canât even move it, because itâs duct-taped to the floor with ancient, expanding, emotional sadness tape.â
âItâs not sadness tape,â the lamp said defensively. âItâs magically reinforced optimism tape. It just has commitment issues.â
Deepika nodded seriously. âYeah, that tape is committed. Itâs in a long-term relationship with this tile now. Probably bought a condo together.â
I sighed and tapped the umbrella, which responded by spinning slowly, like a ballerina who missed rehearsal.
âSo,â I said, âmy consolation prize for getting bullied is a floaty umbrella I canât take with me, that can only protect me from weather Iâm not currently experiencing.â
The lamp puffed up. âAnd your emotional baggage!â
I turned to Deepika. âYou heard him. Itâs also a metaphor. Iâm being protected from feelings.â
Deepika nodded, patting my shoulder. âPerfect. Just what every teenager needsâa giant floating symbol of unresolved trauma.â
The umbrella made a soft woosh sound, as if agreeing.
âYeah, but it looks pretty,â the lamp said, as if that justified everythingâincluding supernatural duct tape and questionable utility.
I glanced up at the umbrella again. It was pretty, in a chaotic, âdesigned-by-someone-who's-emotionally-fragile-but-still-has-a-Pinterest-boardâ sort of way.
It was bright pink, the kind of pink that aggressively demanded attentionâlike it had crashed a birthday party and was too loud about it. Scattered across the canopy were little red drops, which I originally thought were supposed to be hearts but looked suspiciously⦠drippy.
Deepika squinted. âAre those⦠blood droplets?â
âIt is beautiful.â I said.
âBesides,â the lamp added smugly, âyou can use your new bag to teleport it elsewhere. Boomâmobile weather protection.â
I raised an eyebrow. âYou mean Iâve been emotionally dragging this umbrella around (in the past five seconds) and youâre just now telling me I can teleport it?â
The lamp shrugged.
Before I could respond, Glinda bumped into me from behind, her arms full of sparkly gel pens and chaotic energy.
âLook,â she said loudly, gesturing like she was hosting a tour of Bad Decisions. âSheâs talking to a lamp. A lamp, people. She should be sent to an asylum. Or at least the nurseâs office.â
âIâm right here,â the lamp said.
âAnd he talks back,â Glinda added with a theatrical gasp. âThatâs worse! Thatâsâwhatâs the word? Possessed? Hexed? Deeply unemployed? Ugh. Disgustingâ
And she walked off. Just like that.
I hugged the lamp, who awkwardly shuffled its tiny hands but didnât protest. âThanks, I really appreciate it.â
âGirl,â Deepika said, wrinkling her nose, âheâs just giving you his trash. That umbrellaâs got blood stains.â
âYou know,â the umbrella said, its voice suddenly low and serious, âI like you, Felicia. I trust you and see what youâre up to. Iâll tell you about the project I need help with.â
I pulled away from the lamp.
âSure,â I said, trying to sound casual, âanything.â
There was a pause. Then, in a chilling whisper, the umbrella leaned in and hissed, âKill all humans. Start with this girl.â
âWait. Wait. Wait,â Victor said. âMr. Science Teacher had a murderous shapeshifting monster in his classroom. That didnât seem even a little suspicious to you?â
âVictor.â I said. âThis joke is getting old. Mr. Science Teacher didn't put the lamp there.
âThen who did?â
âRead the story, then you will know.)
He did so. Then story read:
It pointed directly at Deepika.
âWhat?â I squawked.
The lampâs glow flickered, suddenly looking a lot less friendly.
I realized, in that exact moment, that the lamp wasn't as friendly as I thought he was. Hmm. I think I prefer him when he was a dead frog.
âOh, you donât have to pretend anymore,â the umbrella hissed, voice dripping with mock sympathy. âWho would really keep her as a friend? Deepika? Sheâs just a distraction. A pawn. A warm body to strike when the time is right.â
I blinked, clutching my sword tighter. âHey! Sheâs not just a âwarm body.â Sheâs the only one who gets my weirdness.â
The umbrella snorted. âAdorable. And with that sword of yours? Youâve got nothing to worry about. In case you didnât know, itâs made of level 2 metal.â
He pulled out a mirror. I guess he got distractedâheâd just told me to kill someone, but apparently explaining magical materials was more important. But I guess distracting him was the best option as I figured out his weakness.
I frowned. âLevel 2 metal? Is that good orâ?â
âThis,â he said, holding it up with a flourish, âis a mirror made of level 4 glass. Very rare, very sturdy. Your sword couldnât break it even if you hit it with all your might.â
I squinted at the shiny surface, half-expecting it to wink at me or judge my fashion choices. âLevel 4 glass? Is that better or worse than level 2 metal?â
The umbrella gave a dramatic sigh. âBetter. Much better. Youâd need level 5 metal or a ridiculously powerful magic user to even scratch this. It all depends on how powerful the magic user was when they enchanted it.â
I tapped the sword against the floor. âSo, my swordâs basically beginnerâs luck.â
âExactly,â the umbrella said smugly. âYour swordâs the training wheels of monster hunting. Cute, but donât expect it to do any real damage.â
I raised an eyebrow. âWell, maybe Iâll just have to level up.â
The umbrella winked. âThatâs the spirit. But rememberâmagic isnât just about power. Itâs about knowing when to use it. And when to run screaming.â
I glanced at Deepika, who was watching us but pretending to look at her phone.
âGot it,â I muttered. âLevel up, then figure out who to run from.â
The umbrella shimmered. âWelcome to monster killing, rookie.â
âWait. Wait. Wait,â Victor said. âWhy say âmonster killing' when you respectfully want to be called a monster chaser? That didn't-
âOkay, Victorâ I said. âThe joke is getting super old. I'm already losing readers.â
âReaders?â
âFrom when I make my life into a web novel.â
âAhâ he said. Because sometimes I sentence does really explain all of life's troubles.
He went back to reading. It read:
By then, Deepika was already boredânot that it took much. The lamp had completely gone off track somewhere between the level 4 glass and the theory of emotional support umbrellas. She was staring at the umbrella, counting the dried blood drops as if they were an art project gone horribly wrong.
âBut do you know what level human skin is?â the umbrella asked, voice suddenly smug. âZero. Same with anything human-made. So go on! Swing that beginnerâs sword all you want. Anything will die from your sword as long as it's not from another dimension.â
Deepika snorted. âLevel zero, huh? Guess that explains why I always lose at dodgeball.â
Mr. Lamp Dude immediately turned to Deepika. His lights flickered in anger. I had stop him before he transformed into something that could seriously hurt Deepika.
âMay I have the mirror?â I asked, holding out my hand cautiously.
The lampâs hands twisted like it was considering whether I was worthy or about to smudge it with fingerprints.
âOh, this?â it said coyly, turning the mirror slowly so the light reflected directly into my eyes like it had studied stage lighting. âLet me show you how it works.â
Ugh, not again. This is exactly why I hate science classâjust endless nonsense dressed up as important stuff.
âThis mirror,â the umbrella said, waving the shiny surface around like a bad magician, âreflects anything. If you were a cyclops with laser eyes, itâd bounce those lasers right back at you. Zap! Instant self-scorch. Your entire team would fry like bacon on a summer grill.â
I imagined a cyclops shrieking, covered in crispy laser burns. What a pretty picture.
âBut youâre a monster killer,â the umbrella added with a wink, âso no worries there. Your teamâs safeâunless someone on your team is secretly a cyclops. Then youâre on your own.â
I raised an eyebrow. âYou donât think thatâs a little harsh? What if my âteamâ includes a cyclops? I mean, I donât even know if I have a team yet.â
The lamp shrugged. âWell, consider it a warning. Mirrors donât play favorites. They just reflect. And sometimes, they reflect too much.â
âYeah, okay, but I want to reflect their failures onto my victims,â I said, narrowing my eyes with determination. âYou know, like make them experience all the embarrassing moments theyâve ever had. Maybe even the ones they try to forget. Karma through reflection.â
The umbrella twirled thoughtfully. âHuh, I guess. Maybe make a wish, like with the bag, orââ
âOr what?â I prompted, crossing my arms.
âOr use the mirrorâs power to turn their own worst moves against them. Imagine a bully tripping over their own feet every time they try to act tough. Or a monster whoâs all bark and no bite suddenly hearing its own roar echo back like a squeaky toy.â
âMay I have it?â I asked, eyeing the magical mirror like it might suddenly sprout legs and run away. âI could use it against a human, making them feel sad and distracted before I wham! With my sword.
âYeah, sure,â The lamp said, tossing it over with a grin that said, Good luck, youâre gonna need it.
I caught it awkwardly, the mirror feeling lighter than I expected.
Great. Now the lamp had no shield.
I swung my sword with all the flair of a movie heroâslicing right through the lamp. It split clean in half, pieces floating apart like a weird science experiment gone wrong.
âWhy?â he asked from his two floating halves, sounding genuinely hurt. âWhy did you do that?â
âYou asked me to kill Deepika, sheâs my friend,â I said firmly. âBesides, I could never just go willy-nilly killing humans. Thatâs not who I am.â
The lampâs top half floated closer, its single eye narrowing. âIâll be avenged. Someone else at this school is with F.R.A.N.K. Theyâll recognize my... demise and seek vengeance.â
I blinked. âWait, you expect to rely on other monsters to avenge you? Sounds like a bad sequel already.â
Deepika grabbed the sword from me and swung at him multiple times, slicing the lamp into pieces that scattered across the floor like confetti at a weird party.
I stared at her, mouth hanging open. âWhat? Heâs a shapeshifter! What if he turns into a lamp zombie and survives everything? Then weâre screwed!â
Deepika shrugged, wiping imaginary dust from her hands. âBetter a zombie lamp than a creepy talking light haunting my nightmares.â
From the floor, the lampâs pieces twitched. âHey! Iâm not a zombie... yet.â
I backed away cautiously. âThatâs exactly what a zombie would say.â
The pieces of the lamp were scattered all over the floor.
âHe did start out as a zombie frog,â I reminded Deepika, waving the twitching lamp pieces in the air. âSo, honestly, this whole zombie lamp thing isnât that surprising.â
Deepika crossed her arms. âWe need to find out who else is dating Frank.â
âI think F.R.A.N.K. is an organization.â
Deepika raised an eyebrow. âPeople are dating an organization now? I need to get in on this. Imagine the money. Forget starting a cult, I've found a better solution to getting the most cash.â
I stared at the broken lamp.
âAre you finally dead, buddy?â
I walked over to a piece and tapped it.
Monster shape shifter
Health: zero
âDefinitely deadâ I said while slinging the bag over my shoulder, âLetâs interview our classmates and see who else is plotting humanityâs end.â