Chapter 32

It was Friday night and my plans consisted of reading a bit since Graham was away in a game.

I tried to focus on the book, but a gnawing urge itched me. I hadn’t heard from Graham all day. Biting my lower lip, I slapped the book shut and grabbed my phone. I shot a quick message to Graham.

Hazel

Hey. Did you arrive safely?

I thought Graham was busy, but he replied immediately as if he’d been waiting for my text all day long.

Graham

Hey. Yes. Wanna do a video call?

Hazel

Sure.

Graham’s video call entered, and I arranged my hair and my PJs before answering. I shuffled in my bed to straighten my spine.

He showed up on screen without a shirt on, on a bed, with messy hair. My mouth dried at the sight, while my gaze wandered up and down.

~Jesus.~

I smiled at him, feeling the thud of missing him already. I wished I was there, cuddling with him. He looked so inviting and warm.

“Hey,” I said in a soft tone.

Graham smiled when he saw me. “Hey, baby.” His husky voice traveled down to my core like sharp ripples. “What are you up to?”

“Just starting to read a book.” I raised it to show it to Graham.

He ran a hand over his face. “You never told me about the last one.”

“You’ll have to read it to find out.” I shot him a playful look and he snorted.

“Baby, you can make me do a lot of things.” My heart stumbled at his words. “But reading a book that long isn’t one of them. I mean, you’ll have to do a lot of convincing, but I believe you know how…” A suggestive twitch of his lip rose slowly.

I blushed at his insinuation. “It’s not ~that~ long,” I protested. I meant it wasn’t standard for fiction, but there were other books much longer. It was only six hundred pages. Well, almost seven hundred. But again, it could be worse.

Graham shook his head. “It is. What’s that one about?” He nodded at the book still in my hand.

“Greek mythology,” I explained. “I’m going to say it is kind of an Iliad retelling, I’m not that far in yet. I think you’d like it. It has Hercules vibes.”

“Hmm…is there anything I can do to make you tell me more about it?”

“Don’t be lazy,” I scoffed, rolling my eyes.

“It’s not being lazy,” he protested in a soft, soothing tone. “Well, not completely.” He had the audacity of not being ashamed of his confession and chuckled. “I also like to listen to you talk about it. And you love to ramble about books. You get all excited and it is cute and sexy.” He shrugged. “I really like to listen to you gush about anything—schoolwork, swimming practice, books.”

Boy, did I love his confessions. They were vulnerable but honest and unapologetic. I wanted to kiss him.

“Gush about me,” he added, and I giggled.

Instead of following the conversation, I looked down, flustered. “That’s sweet of you. Saying that you like to hear me ramble.”

“Surpassing your expectations?” he joked, but there was a vulnerability behind his question. Graham apparently liked to please and make proud the people he cared about. It moved my heart I was part of the small clan.

“Always,” I said earnestly. Graham St. Claire was different from what I expected. Far too different.

It was incredible how you had an image of a person but when you met them for real, they surprised you. Graham had unbalanced me. I never thought of him as thoughtful, honest, or vulnerable, especially the latter when you saw a huge body full of muscles like impenetrable walls. The guy looked unbeatable.

Graham had surprised me at every step, I was grateful he pushed his existence into my life because if it were up to me, we wouldn’t be where we were right now.

I studied him closely. There were bags under his eyes, more than usual.

“You look tired,” I commented.

“Fucking exhausted.” He massaged his face with a hand. “Had to wake up at five a.m. to catch the bus. Then the guys didn’t shut up for a second throughout the entire ride, so I couldn’t sleep. And when we arrived, Coach made us train for a few hours.”

“Well, try to get a good night’s sleep for tomorrow. Maybe I’ll leave you so you can sleep now—”

“No,” he interrupted. He didn’t want to hang up yet, and neither did I. The thought was thrilling. I straightened in bed. “I’ll try to sleep later, but now I want to talk to you.”

I smiled.

“Also, I’m sharing rooms with Jackson, and the asshole went out tonight. I don’t want to fall asleep before he shows up. He’d better not drink and arrive late, or I’ll kick him out of the room,” he explained, annoyed but amused. That was their friendship—they joked about being annoyed with one another. Jackson liked to push, and Graham counterattacked. He swallowed after a moment and clenched his jaw. “I’m a bit nervous.”

“About tomorrow?” I asked and he nodded. Graham had never been nervous or never manifested it. “Are you ready?”

“No. And it would be better if you were here. At least you could distract me.”

“Distract you?”

His eyes smoldered and my heart stopped.

I was conscious of my slow breathing, inhaling and exhaling. The movement caused my chest to jet out. My nipples brushed against the stiff material of my shirt with each inhalation.

“Yeah.” He smirked as he thought about me. I knew what he was thinking about from the way he licked his lips and his eyes glistened. “You’re good at keeping my mind focused on only you.”

His declaration sent a delicious shiver down to my core and it throbbed. I closed my eyes for a second, feeling blood rushing to my face. I swallowed hard as an idea formed in my head. Breathing in, I gathered as much courage as I could before speaking.

I wanted to help Graham however I could. And if this could help him—

I also wasn’t against the idea. Far from it.

Hot shudders spread across my arms, creating goosebumps as I opened my mouth. “Maybe…” My voice was broken and weak. “Maybe I can help distract you…somehow.”

Graham’s face darkened. His nostrils flared as he digested my suggestion. There was clear longing on his face, plain and naked. He must have been in disbelief since he had to ask.

“What do you mean, baby?” he growled, his stare intense.

I shrugged coyly, though my face was red. “You tell me. Is there anything I could do to distract you?”

“Anything?” he asked, inching the phone closer to him like that would bring us closer. He was a bit desperate. His voice came gruff and raspy, barely getting the words out.

My pulse throbbed against my ear, though I managed to nod.

He opened his mouth, exhaled, and cursed. “Fuck.” He blinked and rubbed a hand over his face. He jumped from the bed. “Let me lock the door. I don’t want interruptions.”

A small smile hiked in my mouth as his phone wiggled from his brusque movements to go to the door. I heard him clicking it locked and rushing back to bed.

He swallowed and focused his gaze on me. “Okay, baby.” He ran his tongue across his lip and breathed hard. “Put your phone somewhere so I can see you completely.”

His command raised the hairs on my arms and the back of my neck. My knees wobbled as I crawled on the bed and adjusted the phone against the bed frame. I moved back until I was completely visible to Graham. His gaze ravished all of my body. His face twisted into a painful frown.

“Now, take off your clothes.” His voice was commanding and strong but pleading.

My hands went first to my stiff shirt. I toyed with the hem before I lifted it up in a single yank and exposed my naked breasts to him. He took a sharp breath in and cursed in a low voice. His reaction unbalanced me. Then I raised my shaky hips to remove my shorts and panties in one go. I shivered at the feeling of cold air around my bare skin. I had to press my thighs together.

When I turned to look at him, his hand was rubbing his jaw as he clenched and unclenched it. “Fuck. Try not to kill me here, baby.”

I giggled and crawled on the bed. I couldn’t believe I was doing this. My head was thumping with my pulse and adrenaline.

My breasts jiggled with every move until I was face to face with him. He pressed his lips together.

I licked my lips. “I want to see you too.”

Graham closed his eyes and groaned, but then nodded. He lowered his phone enough for me to catch his hand in his pants already.

“See this?” his hoarse voice asked. He lowered his pants and grabbed his huge erection. My core throbbed and clenched. My mouth dried. “This is what you do to me. You drive me crazy, baby. Crazy.” He squeezed his penis. “I can’t barely think of anything but you.”

I bit my lips, mesmerized as he rubbed his erection up and down. I wanted to grab it from his hands and rub it against my clit and entrance. I wanted it prodding my pussy until it brought me to a climax.

“Baby,” Graham groaned. “Lie on the bed and open your legs. I want to see you as you touch yourself. Imagine it is me.”

Air was robbed from my lungs as I retreated and lay down. The first thing Graham could see was my feet, all the way up to my legs. My face was the furthest away, however, I could see him clearly if I canted my head up. Slowly, I opened my legs for Graham. I propped up on one forearm while my other hand glided down my breasts, stomach, and to my clit. I felt how wet I was, and my finger started to rub small circles around my core. My fingers moved up to soak my clit, and I gasped at the feeling. It didn’t matter how many times Graham had touched me there, it felt intimate when I did it, like uncharted territory.

I looked at Graham one last time. His cheeks were flushed, and his chest rose and fell quickly. A face of complete marvel on him.

I closed my eyes and lowered completely on the bed. With one hand I played with my clit, and with the other, I introduced a finger inside and started thrusting slowly. My hips rose as I moved.

All the time, I thought about Graham. It didn’t feel the same as when he touched me. He was more demanding and faster and harsher. His fingers were thick and filling. His movement carried confidence and skill. However, I was breathless at the thought of Graham watching me at this very moment and jerking off at the sight.

I moaned when Graham started to grunt commands. He said things like: “Faster,” “Open your legs even more. I want to see everything, baby,” or “You’re so fucking beautiful.”

All the time, I was lost in my senses. I felt too much, and I heard his grunts as he fisted his cock. When my muscles were tensed, I felt an up before coming. I whimpered as ripples of pleasure spread down my legs and up my stomach and back to my chest.

“Oh, ~Graham~,” I moaned, closing my eyes hard and writhing.

Then he cursed and chanted my name over and over. “Fuck, ~Hazel~, fuck.” He was reaching his orgasm. Though my bones were lax, I managed to prop up and see him come.

He came and continued pumping his cock until he was satisfied and slumped back in bed. I looked at him and smiled.

He was blushing and his eyes were bright and alert. His smile was soft and lazy. “What I would do to be there to hold you.”

My chest clenched. “I hope this helped you clear your mind.”

“Did it, baby?” He chuckled. “I don’t think I’ll be able to think about anything else but this. God, I can’t wait to come back. I miss you so much.” He rubbed his face.

“I miss you too,” I admitted. It was maddening it’d been only one day, and the day had dragged slowly though I had school. I couldn’t imagine the weekend without him. “It’s getting late. You’d better get that sleep now.”

“I will.” He grinned. “Thank you, baby.”

There was silence between us. Neither of us was willing to hang up yet, but the silence felt charged, like too many emotions were going on but no one said anything.

My chest bubbled with emotion as words clung to the tip of my tongue. My heart was beating hard, and it wasn’t precisely because of what we had done, but with the realization of what those words were.

~I love you. So, so much.~

Should I…

No.

I got frightened. As much as I wanted to say the words, I wanted it to be when we were face to face. When I was able to touch him, caress his cheek, and get lost in his eyes.

My stomach twisted and churned as the silence continued.

Finally, Graham opened his mouth, and I felt the anticipation building inside me. “Sweet dreams, Hazel,” he said with a blissful smile, though his eyes said otherwise. Before I could answer, he disconnected the call.

That moment haunted me.