10: delicate

Nila wasn't there at her stop.

Alarm bells rang in Vijay's head and he wasted no time in pulling out his phone and texting her. It didn't matter if it seemed too desperate because Nila never missed a day of college unless she was sick or there was an emergency. She had mentioned it during the times they had texted.

Where are you?

Lateeeee.

Did the bus leave?

Yeah.

Fuckkkk

But I didn't

What

Vijay had hurried out of the bus like there had been a bomb inside it. He didn't see a point in going to college in a bus without Nila. It was simply not worth it.

Nila rushed to the bus stop, her tote bag bouncing with each step she took. He watched her slow into a jog and then a speed-walk as she reached him. Her jaw hung open as she slowly began to believe he was indeed waiting for her at her bus stop. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" she asked. Well, that wasn't quite the response he had wanted from her. He was disappointed, not surprised.

"No that was sweet of you, Vijay or thank you, Vijay?" he asked her back, placing a palm over his heart. "You wound me."

She rolled her eyes. "My bad. Let me correct myself. How stupid of you, Vijay," she said, her words dripping with sugar venom. It had become his favourite drug, especially when it was accompanied with Nila's infamous eye roll.

"What happened? Why are you late?" he asked.

"Anamika made me binge this new series with her and I guess this is punishment for relentlessly pushing the next episode button all night. I only slept at 4:30 in the morning. Can you believe it? And the series had the most irresponsibly made ending in the—" Vijay didn't listen to her. He was too busy studying her. Nila was dishevelled, her freshly-washed hair all over the place. Her eyeliner was missing and her lipstick was smudged, just a tad bit near the left corner of her lips. Without thinking, Vijay reached out and swiped that brown tint off her skin.

Nila froze under his touch.

Vijay snatched his hand back and looked away, tucking his hand into his pockets. "Um, there was lipstick." Nila averted her gaze but a blush was creeping up on her slowly. She was trying hard not to show any emotion. Vijay could see that. "It-it was smudged. I-uh..." He ran a hand through his hair and turned away. He would hate himself if he made Nila uncomfortable. Dammit, he couldn't keep his hands to himself, can he? "I'm sorry. I didn't think—"

"It's fine. You were only looking out for me," Nila said, forcing a smile on her face. Her eyes still didn't meet his. "I'm sorry I overreacted."

"You sure, Nila?"

"Yes, it's not a worry at all. Actually, I should thank you. I would have looked stupid walking around with lipstick on my face." She laughed nervously.

Vijay smirked. "Right. Then maybe I should also tell you that you have lipstick on your teeth."

A small squeak escaped her lips as her eyes grew wide. Her palm flew to her mouth and she spun around to the other side quickly, away from him. She pulled out her phone to check and wipe it off. "Why didn't you tell me this before? You let me talk all this time with lipstick on my teeth?" she asked, her back still facing him.

"I mean, it was kinda funny—"

She spun around to grace him with a glare, lowering her phone. "You're such a meanie. You should wear a sign around your neck saying: Beware! Deceptive charming face, Scum underneath."

Vijay chuckled. "All I got from that was that you think I have a charming face."

Nila looked away. "I mean, it's true," she whispered after a beat. Vijay bent forward to see her face but she turned away.

"What was that? Why are you acting all shy?" he asked, stepping closer to her.

"I am not!" she retorted back, glaring at him. "Why are you acting like an asshole today?"

"Woman, I gave up my seat on the bus for you!"

"I didn't ask you to!" she fired back.

"So, you are not even a little bit grateful that I did?"

"No! That was irresponsible of you. I know how to travel alone. I'd been doing that before I met you," she said, stepping under the sunshine to face him better. The bags under her eyes were visible.

Vijay held her arm and pulled her into the shade. "Fine. I'm leaving!" he said, turning around. He had no clue where to go or when the next bus would come. But Vijay didn't stop walking away from her.

It took only half a minute before a dainty palm wrapped around his arm and tugged him to a halt. "Stay," Nila said. "I'm sorry."

He faced her. "Is everything okay, Nila?"

"I am just tired. I don't function well when I don't sleep for a full eight hours." She pulled her hand from his arm and pushed her hair back that was unravelling out of her hairdo. "I also missed my coffee and breakfast. What I'm trying to say is, I'm cranky. I took it out on you. I am really touched you waited for me even though I think it was a stupid thing to do."

Vijay grinned. "You're forgiven. I'm sorry I made it easy for you to get cranky."

Nila stood next to him in a way that her shoulders touched his. "You're forgiven too." She pulled her hair-tie from her hair and handed it to him without a word. Weaving through her silky black strands, she gathered it all up and twisted into a bun. Vijay returned the hair-tie back to her when she opened her palm and watched her tie it in place. All of this was done in silence, as if they knew each other so well that words weren't needed to know what the other wanted. Vijay enjoyed it.

He was so distracted that he didn't see the bus coming until Nila hit his arm like a kindergarten child with a drum kit. "Bus! Bus! Bus! Bus!" she chanted with every slap.

He hid a smile, enjoying every excited slap against his arm and jostling like it was a once-in-a-while opportunity.

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Vijay eyed a pair of people on the bus from where he stood. The man looked like he was three or four years older than him and the woman was not as old. They sat together on the seat, whispering things to each other. He couldn't see the man but there was such a bright smile on the woman's face. She watched him with such fascination, admiration and something— something softer. Something so delicate it could easily shatter. The woman handed him a piece of bluetooth earphone and she tapped something on her phone. After a few seconds, the man nodded and said something to which she beamed again.

Something ached in Vijay. He wanted that. He didn't know if that man realised how she looked at him but he hoped for him that he did. That was the look that he yearned for. Nila's face flashed in his mind and he bit his lip. He had no idea what he was doing with Nila. He wanted her. He wanted her to be his. But he didn't know how to make it happen.

For now, the only thing he knew for sure was that he loved to spend time with her. He wanted to be around her all the damn time. He could listen to her go on and on about anything and he'd listen to her every word. Vijay wanted to capture each frame of her smile in his mind and look at it when he was feeling frigid. He would let the warmth of her soak him, get burnt by her light and come back for more. Because he was a fucking addict.

He was pulled back to his thoughts when the bus light flickered on. Outside, the sky had gotten dark, spreading its shadowed claws into the bus. Nila must be waiting in the bus stop by now, he thought. She had been so tired in the morning that she should have just taken the day off. He was worried about how her day went.

Vijay then noticed the couple shouldering their bags and removing their earphones. The next stop was where Nila would be getting in. And it seemed like the couple would be getting down. Vijay's brain had never put something together so quickly. He moved next to the seat in a flash. When the bus stopped and the couple left the seat, he sat down and put his bag on the seat next to him.

"Take your bag," A man said, already going to sit on the seat.

"Someone is coming."

"Who?"

Right on time, Nila's curious face came into his view. He grabbed her hand and pulled her to the seat, only taking his bag when she was about to sit down. The man grunted in disapproval and turned to the other side.

"We got a seat?" Nila asked, her eyes lighting up. Vijay felt a wave of pride in him for grabbing the seat.

"Yeah, we did," he grinned.

Nila put her palm around her mouth in shock but her eyes were clearly reflecting glee. Then she did something that made his heart stop in his chest. She put her arms around his neck and squeezed. "Oh my god! I can't believe it! Thank you so much. I am so tired and I was about to cry when I saw the crowd in the bus. You are the best!" she said, pressing her cheek to his for a second and pulling back. "I could finally rest my legs. They're killing me. It's like I'm carrying double the weight of me today because I am so exhausted."

Vijay's speech never hiccuped. But since Nila, it had been malfunctioning. He couldn't get out a single fucking word.

He nodded like a loser.

Nila pulled out her phone. "... best day," she whispered to herself, clearly not ready to leave her bubble of happiness. "Oh, and I wanted to show you something. Oh, before that— here!" She pulled out the sports drink.

"Nila," he said, his voice scratchy. "These drinks cost too much. I don't want you to spend so much money on me."

She looked at him like he'd grown a new head. "You don't like it?" she asked.

"No, it's not that. We are all on a student's budget, Nila. I don't want you to spend unnecessarily," he told her gently. Their shoulders brushed.

She blinked. "It's not unnecessary."

Vijay didn't know what to do with that piece of information. He was already spiralling from that half-hug that she had given him.

"I like spending money on people I like," she said. "So don't worry too much. It's not burning a hole in my wallet. Besides, you get me bus tickets all the time."

"Nila, bus tickets are less than twenty bucks," Vijay said flatly. She likes spending money on people she likes.

LIKES.

LIKES.

LIKES.

Holy shit.

"I wanted to so I did. Don't stop me unless you don't like it," Nila said, pressing the drink in his hands and going back to her phone. "It's a Thank you for today. For every day, actually."

He nudged her shoulders. "You know a simple thank you would suffice."

"I know but I love spending on—"

"People you like. Got it. Case closed," he said, unable to hear the words from her mouth again. He didn't know what it meant and how much that word held significance. He was losing his fucking mind.

Her eyes lit up again. "I wanted to show you this. Look at how much she's grown!" she said, showing her phone. It was a picture of a plant. Vijay frowned but the creases thinned out when he realised it was the plant he had bought her. "She's so beautiful, right?"

Vijay had never heard a person call a green stem with five leaves on it beautiful. But he liked how she found beauty in the simplest of things.

"I will send you pictures of her from time to time. Soon, she will bloom."

"It can grow flowers?" he asked stupidly.

Nila frowned. "Wait– wait, you didn't know what plant you bought me?"

He shrugged. "I told you I picked the one that was similar to the one you carried. Why?"

"Never mind." Nila tucked in a smile. "You got me a Violet. And do you know what I'm calling her?"

"What?"

"Vi."

Vijay laughed. "Very original."

She rolled her eyes and smacked him. "Vi. It has two meanings. Vi for Violet and Vi for....?" The dip in her voice meant that she was expecting him to guess it.

His brain wasn't working. Couldn't she tell?

"Vi for Vijay, you idiot. How could you forget your own name?" she said, giving up on him after his silence.

She named her plant after him.

What was with Nila today? Did she wake up and choose war? She was wreaking havoc on his poor heart.

"That's–that's very clever," he said, laughing nervously. Gosh, he sounded like Krish. Except he wasn't blurting out random science facts out of nowhere.

"Anyway, I will take good care of–" Nila yawned, stifling it with her dainty fingers. She had rose-gold nail paint on, "-- Vi. God, I'm so sleepy. I'll close my eyes for a bit. Can you wake me up when my stop is near?"

"Yeah, yeah, you get some sleep," he said. Nila closed her eyes but he didn't think she would actually doze off. The bus was so noisy it could be a prime source of noise pollution. How she managed to sleep amidst all that was a mystery. Vijay got her a ticket when the conductor came by and wished he had let her take the window seat because the man standing next to their seat was eyeing Nila from time to time. When someone knocked into her shoulders from the side, he almost cursed them for waking her up but he realised that she hadn't woken up.

Nila's head simply lolled to the side and fell on Vijay's shoulders.

Fuck.

She was so warm. Her cheek against the thin fabric of his t-shirt was lighting his skin on fire. Nila adjusted her position in her sleep and her hand gripped his shirt sleeve as support. Slowly her fingers slipped and fell against his inner elbow. She looked so uncomfortable in the position but she didn't seem to care. If he was more to her than what he was then, he would have slipped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer so that she could sleep better. That would raise eyes in a bus but he didn't give a fuck.

But if only he was more, right?

Vijay sighed. His thoughts were going haywire, oscillating between two extremes. He needed two business days to unpack and process everything that happened that day.

Guess it was his turn losing sleep and staying awake till 4 in the morning.

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a/n: by some strange luck, my reel went viral on instagram (🤭) and has brought in a bunch of new readers. i just wanted to say hello to y'all and i hope you like the story so far! thank you for stopping by! ❤️