Chapter 72

ASHER

My mom heads into Ella’s and Tilly’s rooms, preparing them for the girls to sleep in tonight. She’s made the beds with fresh linens, found some spare clothes for them since we didn’t pack any, and even whipped up her famous hot chocolate topped with marshmallows and cream for a cozy nightcap.

Ebony, however, politely declines the hot chocolate, revealing her lactose intolerance. This makes my mom frown, but she nods in understanding.

Addison seems more than content to take Ella’s room. She accepts the pajamas and hot chocolate with a soft thank you, then promptly closes the door behind her.

This leaves Maddison and Ebony to occupy Tilly’s room.

“If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask Asher to get it for you,” my mom announces, as if they weren’t already aware of that option.

She hands Maddison the pajamas and a mug of hot chocolate, earning a nod from both girls who are glancing my way from my doorway, trying to peek into my childhood bedroom.

They know where I am, but I doubt they’ll seek me out.

Once they’ve closed their door, my mom instructs me to follow her into my room.

It seems the time has come to bare all to the one person I’ve been dreading to tell. My mom might reveal truths I’m not ready to hear, ask things of me that I’m not prepared to do.

She’ll be expectant, eager to uncover the truth.

“Come sit, baby boy,” she says.

Our hot chocolate is waiting on my bedside table. My bed is freshly made, as if I’d slept here just last night, and my mom climbs in without hesitation.

I grab my pajamas from my drawer, quickly change in the bathroom, and then rejoin her.

“Okay, Mama, what do you want to know?” I ask, climbing in beside her.

She takes a sip of her cocoa, leaning against my headboard as she waits for me to begin.

“Why don’t you start at the beginning? I want to know everything, baby boy,” she says.

I sigh. Of course, she does. But am I ready to spill it all?

The fact that I slept with Maddison?

The stolen kisses with Ebony that I instantly regretted?

Ironically, I regretted sleeping with Maddison, but not because I didn’t want it, but because I did.

Honesty is the best policy, right?

“Well…it all started at work with Daniel. A woman came to him for help; her daughter was missing. But Daniel said he didn’t practice that type of law, that he couldn’t help her.

I couldn’t accept that. She was so desperate, and he was so dismissive. So I talked to her, looked at her information, and agreed to help her… Actually, I’ve failed to contact her.” I trail off, realizing that in the midst of everything with the girls, I’ve neglected to reach out to her.

“Anyway, I took her folder and started to look into it. I stumbled upon Maddison quite by accident. It was all a fluke, really, but there she was, one of the girls I was trying to help find right in front of me.

She played hard to get, but eventually, I got a meeting with Fennick. That’s when he offered me the services of his girls. He introduced me to Ebony and Addison, and I knew, Mama—I knew I had to pay whatever he wanted for both of them.”

“And Maddison, how did you come to pay for her?”

“She showed up at my apartment in a bad state, and the very next day, Fennick cornered me to make payment for her. He left me no choice… That’s when I realized how deep I was in shit I had no business being in.”

“You haven’t slept with them, have you?” Mama asks, catching me off guard.

I can’t meet her gaze. Instead, I turn my face toward the bedroom door to avoid her disappointed eyes.

She sighs, a sigh so deep it feels like a knife twisting in my soul.

“Who?” she asks, her voice soft but laced with disappointment.

“Maddison. It was mutual, Mama. I didn’t force her to sleep with me.”

My words aren’t entirely true, though, and I know that. Just because she agreed, it doesn’t mean she truly consented, if you catch my drift.

And then there’s Ebony.

The kiss she initiated, the one where she pleaded with me to supply her with the drugs she’s addicted to.

And then today, the kiss I planted on her without her consent…

“Asher, you need to keep things platonic with them… Damn. I know how ridiculous that sounds, given how your fathers and I met. But I’m serious, Asher. It’s not a good idea for you to get involved with her.”

“Why?” I questioned, upset that my mama didn’t approve of Maddison.

What had Maddison done to earn her disapproval?

“This is a big deal, Asher, and you’re the one who paid for them. If it comes out that you’ve been intimate with her after the money changed hands, it could create a whole mess of problems we don’t need.”

“She agreed to it, Mama. I didn’t force her,” I defended, but I found myself nodding in agreement.

Deep down, I knew that sleeping with Maddison was all kinds of wrong. I had felt it the moment I stepped into my Dad’s office.

There was a part of me that regretted it even then, despite the undeniable connection we seemed to share.

“I’ll let you get some rest. We can talk more about this tomorrow,” Mama said, kissing my forehead and preparing to leave my room.

As she began to walk away, the words I had been holding back suddenly rushed out.

“I kissed Ebony today…”

I winced as she froze, her foot hanging in the air for a moment. Even from behind, I could see her shock.

“Asher!” she exclaimed, saying my name in a way I’d never heard before.

“She’s too young. You can’t,” she said, turning to face me.

Her eyes were wide, and worry lines creased her forehead.

“Please, Asher. Stay away from her,” she pleaded. “She’s just a child…”

“I know, Mama. I regretted it immediately. But there’s something inside me that wants to protect her, and I don’t understand why or how to figure it out.”

“You have to ignore it, Asher. She needs to go home and recover from all of this. She might even need to see a psychiatrist. The last thing she needs is more trauma.”

“I know. Do you think I’m an idiot, Mama? The first time, she was the one asking for drugs. She started it. And today…it was just a quick kiss on her neck, and I pulled away immediately, knowing it was wrong.”

“She’s addicted to drugs?” Mama asked.

“Heroin. It’s been a week since she last used.”

“Nothing at all?”

“Nothing,” I lied.

“Damn, Asher. She should be going through proper detox.”

“She’s okay; her symptoms are almost gone now.”

I wanted to tell her that I was also withdrawing—that my symptoms were fading too. But I knew this was the absolute worst time to bring that up, even if I wanted her to be proud of me.