: Chapter 12
When in Rome
Well, that escalated quickly.
Guess whoâs in my truck, loopy out of her mind and fresh from a checkup at our local doctorâs office where I begged Dr. Macky to come in after hours? Iâll give you two hints: (1) She promised Iâd not even notice her around; and (2) Sheâs been nothing but noticeably since I met her.
This woman has only been in my life for a few days and sheâs going to be the end of me. The moment I saw her tonight I could tell something wasnât right. Her eyes were glassy and her normal sparkle was absent. She looked horrified and out of it all at once. For a split second, I thought someone slipped something in her drink and I was about to flip every table in that bar until I figured out who did it.
But then I saw her pull those pills out of her purse and stare at them and it all clicked. The relief I felt that she wasnât maliciously drugged was immediately replaced with terror. I checked the pill container only to find that she accidentally took a sleeping pill. Iâm not a doctor, but even I know that mixing sleeping pills and alcohol is not a good thing.
Annie came back over to the table when she realized something was up, and I had her help me discreetly get Amelia to the truck. Luckily, everyone in the bar was so rowdy and dancing that no one seemed to notice us. I got her into the front seat of my truck and told Annie what was going on.
I sat with Amelia in the truck while Annie went inside and used the barâs phone to call Dr. Macky. Iâve never driven so fast in my life, and Iâve never been more thankful to show up late to the bar before. If I had been there an hour earlier, I would have been blocked in just like my sisterâs truck.
Anyway, we made it to the clinic and Dr. Macky did a quick evaluation of Amelia. Her blood pressure was fine, her oxygen levels were fine, and although sheâs loopy as shit, the doctor said sheâll be okay and just needs to sleep it off.
Right now, sheâs passed out across the bench seat of my truck, and Iâm standing outside the door with my sister trying to find a way out of this responsibility I didnât want in the first place. But even as I think it, I know thereâs no way Iâm leaving her like this tonight. I want to, but I just canât.
Annie looks toward the open door of my truck where we can see Amelia with her dark hair fanned out around her and her cheek squished against the leather, mouth breathing to her fullest. âShe kinda reminds me of a puppy. All lost and sad. Please will you keep her, Noah? Pleeeeease,â says Annie, putting her hands under her chin and blinking a hundred times.
See, the thing about Annie is, sheâs quiet until sheâs alone with me. And then she has no problem speaking her mind.
I roll my eyes, not allowing myself to ask why my sister thinks Amelia is sad. Iâve gotten that feeling, too, butâ¦it doesnât matter. I donât need to know. In fact, the less I get to know that woman, the better.
âNo. And all Iâm saying is you and the other girls shouldnât get attached. You canât trust a woman like her.â I give her a stern look to drive the point home. I can already tell each of my sisters are falling in love with Amelia and thereâs absolutely no good that will come from it. Weâre no one to her. She wonât even look over her shoulder when she leaves town on Monday, and theyâd do well to remember it.
âOooh, stern look. You must really mean business,â she says with a deadpan delivery. âYou know what? I bet sheâs not actually a pop star but an undercover agent, sent to this small town to scout out a base for her new assassin agency.â Sheâs nodding thoughtfully. âYouâre right, we better keep our distance.â
I narrow my eyes at her and try not to smile. âSmart-ass. Iâm just trying to keep yâall from getting your hearts broken when your new friend leaves you high and dry.â
âKeep us from getting our hearts broken, or keep you from getting your heart broken?
â
Itâs annoying having siblings who know me so well. I refuse to play right into her hand, though. âKnock it off, and hop in the back.â
âFine. Are we going back to your place?â
âNope,â I say, closing the tailgate behind Annie after sheâs settled. âSheâs gonna take your bed tonight.â
Annie gives me a horrified look. âWhy? Youâre the one with the spare bed!â
âI may not like her, but that doesnât mean I donât want her to feel safe when she wakes up in the morning feeling like crap. Sheâs sleeping it off at your place tonight where sheâll be surrounded by women and not in a house alone with a man she hardly knows.â
I can tell she wants to grumble but has too much of a soft heart to decline. âAll right, I see your point. She can have my bed. I forget other people donât know youâre a saintly old man like we do.â
âNot so saintly according to your cussing chart.â
She points a finger at me. âWhich, by the way, you owe the jar forty dollars.â
I groan. Iâve paid more money into that damn jar than my retirement fund. If Annie didnât donate it all to charity at the end of the year, Iâd have stopped indulging her a long time ago. But for whatever reason, us not cussing is important to her, and soâ¦I guess itâs important to me, too. At least when sheâs around.
Just as Iâm about to slide into the driverâs seat, Annieâs head pops around the truck. âAnd Noah? Grandma wouldâve liked Rae, you know? No matter what you think, sheâs got a kind heart. I can tell.â She smiles like sheâs reliving a memory. âGrandma always wanted someone like her for you.â
I stare at Annie, trying to mentally bounce her words back to her instead of soaking them in. And then point to the bed of the truck. âSit back. Weâre leaving now.â She gives me a quietly stern look until I tack on, Does everyone in this town know my weak spot? Itâs like I have a red-painted target on my chest. They know exactly the person to mention to rip my heart in two.
â
Ipull up the gravel drive to the house and cut the engine. Ameliaâs head is only a few inches from my lap and some of her hair is draped across my thigh. She whimpers when I poke her shoulder. âHey, drunky. Wake up.â
she says, cracking her blue eyes open to peer up at me. Shoot, Annie was right. She looks just like a lost puppy right now. I donât love the protective instincts itâs triggering in me.
âYou might as well be,â I say, but sheâs already asleep again. That pill and alcohol combo steamrolled her.
I get out and walk around my truck to open her door. Annie hops out of the bed of the truck and stands beside me. âShould we just tug one of her arms until sheâs sitting up?â
âSeems like our best bet.â
Annie and I work together to get Amelia sitting upright. Her head lolls back against the glass and her mouth falls openâeyes closed. If we stuck a pair of sunglasses on her, people might think weâre reenacting âAll right, upsy daisy,â I tell Amelia, draping one of her arms around my neck and hauling her out. She gives zero effortâlimply hanging off my side and forcing me to hold on so tight Iâm afraid Iâm going to bruise her. Annie goes to Ameliaâs other side, but my sister is only five feet tall (literally, not an inch more) and isnât much help.
âScrew it,â I say, turning so I can scoop Amelia up in my arms and carry her inside. This is much easier somehow, especially after Annie resituates Ameliaâs face so her head is on my shoulder and sheâs no longer hanging off me like a dead person. Geez, what a weird couple of days.
Annie runs ahead of me to unlock the door and turn on the lights as I carry Amelia up the front steps, remaining mentally detached from how she feels in my arms and how sweet her hair smells or how her breath feels against my neck. I get her inside and set her down on Annieâs bed, and no sooner than her body hits the mattress does she whimper and clutch her stomach, curling into a little ball with her eyes closed. Is she nauseated? Dr. Macky said it could be a side effect. Again that instinct to protect and soothe startles me.
I look down at Amelia with Annie at my side. Weâre both a little unsure of what to do now. Actually, I know what I should do. Itâs time to hand this situation over to my sister. She can take care of Amelia since sheâs the one who invited her out in the first place. The pop star is her problem now, not mine. I did my duty by getting her seen by a doctor, and taking her somewhere safeânow I can go home and sleep easy.
I should go.
Sheâll be fine.
Turns out, Iâm not going anywhere except to the corner of the room to push Annieâs reading chair closer to the bed. Next, I go to the bathroom and wet a washrag with cool water so I can dab it across Ameliaâs forehead to help with her nausea. Annie watches all this with an overly indulgent smirk.
âWhat?â I ask her, even though the clip in my voice is clear and I donât want to hear her thoughts.
She presses her lips together and shakes her head, amusement sparkling in her eyes. âNothing. Nothing at all. Iâm going to go get a shower really quick and try to wash off the smell of Hankâs. Can you dab my head with cool water, too, when I get out? Looks really nice.â
âShut up,â I say, pretending to try to kick her as she skirts out of the room chuckling. I like when Annie shows fire, though. I wish sheâd do it more around other people.
I continue to run the washcloth across Ameliaâs forehead, not sure if this is even doing much, but I remember seeing someone do it in a movie once. Come to think of it, it might have been one of those old-timey movies one of my sisters made me watch. And I canât remember if the heroine was actually sick or just had a fever. Whatever, at least this makes me feel like Iâm doing something.
Not even sure why I want to be doing something to help Amelia.
And then she groans again and her eyes crack open. She squints at me almost like sheâs trying to decide if Iâm real or a dream.
âFeeling okay?â I ask quietly.
âNoah?â
âYeah, itâs me.â
Amelia breathes in deeply and tries to keep her eyes open, but canât. âAmâ¦I safe?â she asks in a sleepy slur that twists my heart.
âYes. Youâre at my sistersâ house. Theyâre going to keep an eye on you tonight.â
She lets out a sound between misery and embarrassment, never opening her eyes. âNoooo. They were gonna be my friends. Now they wonât want to be.â
I frown and use my knuckles to wipe away the tear that has just streaked down the side of her cheek. âWhy do you think that?â
âHigh maintenance.â She pauses and I think maybe she fell back to sleep before she speaks again. âPeople only like me when Iâm easy.â With her eyes closed, her brows squeeze together and another tear drops down the side of her face. âMust always be polite.â
I shouldnât, but I use my hand to smooth away another one of her tears, because I canât stand seeing them streaking down her face. Amelia catches my hand with hers and squeezes it. I know sheâs loopy out of her mindâevidence that her eyes are still shut and her words are practically one long slur. But thereâs a raw honesty that cuts painfully through the triple-reinforced walls of my heart.
âBut not with you.â She nuzzles her cheek against the back of my hand. âI donât have to be polite with you because you donât like me anyways.â
âThatâs not true,â I say, more to myself than her.
She hums. âMy mom used to be my best friendâbut she only likes me for my money now. Susan only cares about my success. And the world only wants me for Rae Rose.â Thereâs a long pause as she sighs deeply. âIâm drowning and no one sees me.â
Iâm speechless as Amelia continues pressing my hand against her soft face like itâs the most precious thing sheâs ever held. Itâs agony and heaven to have her confide in me. To feel her holding me like she needs me. I shut my eyes against her words, because, I donât want to feel anything toward her, but I do. Sheâs hurting and lonely and for some reason, I care deeply that she not feel either of those things. Iâve worked very hard ever since Merritt to not let another woman have so much power over my heart again, and of course, this womanâthe most unavailable oneâis who squeezed her way through the bars and is making me things.
Itâs not infatuation. Not even lust. Itâs the worst of all the feelingsâ¦care.
Care is reckless because it doesnât come with the seat belt that selfishness offers. Care has so much to lose, and almost always ends in heartbreak. Unfortunately, Iâm powerless against keeping my heart in check around her anymore. Thereâs a very short list of people in my life that I allow myself to truly care for, and it looks like I just added another name to it.
I push Ameliaâs hair back from her ear so I know she can hear me. âI see you.â