Between Desire and Denial: Chapter 23

My brother tucked a basketball under his arm and glared at us as soon as he saw us making our way over. I tried to talk fast under my breath to Dimitri. “So, we don’t get along, we haven’t in years. He’s not been himself lately. He won’t want to talk to you or me.’

“Best time to make amends is the present time,” he murmured.

One foot in front of the other, I thought of what I would say when we got to the driveway.

But when we got there, nothing came out.

I stood there with Dimitri, staring at my brother, whose eyes looked much more lucid than the last time I’d seen him. But everything else was still so different. He used to be so much bigger, was still taller as he stood there, but the muscles he’d had before were gone as he dribbled a basketball in front of us. “Guess the rumors Dad told me are true.” He looked us up and down, disgust in his eyes. “You moved back here for him.”

I folded my arms across my chest and nodded. “I moved back to be closer to home and you and to be with him. Yes.”

“Dad’s not happy about it. Can’t stand that you’re basically working with the enemy.” His choice in words held so many meanings—Enemy of Paradise Grove, of our family, of the Diamond Syndicate or something deeper than that? I wanted to ask but couldn’t with Dimitri there. Knox just shook his head at me like I should know better. Turning his attention to Dimitri, he asked, “You enjoying the ripple effect you’re having around here?”

“Just trying to make Paradise a little better,” Dimitri responded. He wouldn’t be deterred so easily. “You play ball?”

My brother nodded before he threw the ball harder than needed right at Dimitri’s chest. Instead of getting furious like I instantly did, Dimitri chuckled and grabbed the ball fluidly. He dribbled once, twice, three times, then executed a flawless jump shot.

Although I was impressed, my brother rolled his eyes like a snobby teenager and walked over to grab the ball as it bounced away. He dribbled and jumped in the way Dimitri had to make a shot from the exact same distance. As he retrieved the ball, he asked, “So, you plan on sticking around once your investments are settled, Mr. Hardy? Or this all for show?”

“Probably depends on your sister.” Dimitri shrugged, and I glanced at him in question. He had a serious look in his eyes as his gaze bounced between us. “It started out as a show.”

“Dimitri!” I gasped his name, not sure what he was doing.

“We’re honest with family, Honeybee. I’m being honest with your brother. He needs to understand, I was originally here for an investment but now I’m only here for you.” He said it so genuinely, tears sprang to my eyes immediately. His focus now was on Knox though. “She only wanted to be here because of you. So if she stays after we figure it all out, I’ll stay. If she doesn’t, I’m willing to go where she wants.”

“So, this between you is real now?” Knox asked me instead of Dimitri.

“Real for me,” Dimitri answered. “Can I talk to you inside? Invite us in for a water?” he asked my brother.

Knox’s gaze flicked to mine. “Georgette isn’t home. Hasn’t been here for a few days.” I wasn’t sure if he was giving me a heads-up or trying to coax me into agreeing to come inside.

I chewed on my cheek before I said, “I’d love some water, Knox.”

So we followed my little brother inside, and my whole body broke out in a sweat from the anxiety that rolled around in my blood. How could I know where Knox’s head was at, what he’d done the last few days, how he’d felt?

We hadn’t spoken since last week when he’d explicitly told me to stop calling and texting. He’d done it at our father’s request, I was sure … but still.

And I hadn’t really talked with Dimitri about it either. How could I explain the Knox situation to Dimitri, who knew nothing about any of it?

Knox sat at the island and waved me over to the sink. “Help yourself. Sure you still know your way around.”

I sighed and grabbed two glasses from the cupboard, one for me and one for Dimitri. I looked at Knox, really looked at him, to see if he was completely aware today before I asked, “Want water or—?”

“I can get my own water if I need it.”

“Okay. How’s it going, Knox?” I tried again. “You seem better since the last time I saw you—’

“You don’t need to act like you give a shit if I feel better or not,” he grumbled, his tone laced with venom.

“Careful.” Dimitri’s voice was low.

“Careful?” My brother didn’t seem to weigh anything regarding Dimitri logically. He appeared aware and not as tired as when I’d last seen him, but there was no way he thought he would be able to square up to Dimitri. “What the hell are you going to do about it?”

“Look, we don’t know each other real well, Knox, but I don’t let anyone talk to my girlfriend that way. Whether it’s a stranger, a friend, or a brother. Her father could look sideways at her, and I’m going to have something to say about it. You get me?”

“My sister can handle herself.”

“I never said she couldn’t. But she doesn’t have to when she’s with me.” Then, Dimitri rubbed his jaw. “I got sisters too. And quite frankly, she shouldn’t have to when she’s with you either. She’s your blood. You’re supposed to take care of her.”

My brother scoffed but his dark eyebrows dipped a bit, and I saw something like guilt flash across his face when he glanced at me. I was older, I was supposed to take care of him, and even though Knox sat back down and didn’t look like he wanted to argue it, I needed to say something. “Dimitri’s right. You’re my brother. We haven’t been acting much like siblings the past few years though. I should have come home more.”

I would be the bigger person. I wiggled the flower in my hair and tried to maintain eye contact with him. Admitting to the heartache I might have caused him by leaving him behind wasn’t easy, but I stood tall as I faced his response head-on.

His fists clenched and his frown deepened. Then he breathed out what looked like a load of tension and combed a hand through his short curly hair. “Dad and Georgette are a fucking lot, Olive Bee.” He said it so quietly, and his jaw flexed as he whispered my name like he needed me to understand, to connect to him again. “Dad and …” He hesitated like he wanted to say more as he looked at Dimitri. “This year has been a lot.”

I rounded the island and threw my arms around him. He didn’t return the hug, and he felt so stiff and small under my hold, but I still squeezed him tight and said, “I’m here now. I’ll come over and—”

“Or you can come stay with us,” Dimitri offered.

“What?” I gasped and my curls whipped around as I looked up.

“We’ve got room if you’re not feeling it here.” So nonchalantly he offered his house to my brother, so easily he made me think he was a different sort of man than I’d ever met. He was ready for a commitment, ready for the responsibility.

And Knox actually thought about it for more than a second, longer than he should have if he was happy at home. “Nah. It’s fine. My stepmom and Dad haven’t been home much anyway. I got things to do this summer, too, and my friends—”

“Who are your friends, by the way?” I asked, trying not to sound intrusive. “Esme said you two weren’t hanging around much anymore.”

“You talked to her? When did you see her?” His eyes were like lasers on me now, bright and aware.

“She stopped by with pizza the other night.” I didn’t mention the library.

He kicked at nothing on the ground as he asked, “What else did she say about me?”

“Not much.” I crossed my arms. “Just that you don’t hang out anymore.”

He let out a small “ha” and shook his head as he looked down at those fisted hands again. “Yeah, I don’t know. She got her own friends, I guess.”

“Really?” I asked and then threw out, “Because she looked pretty sad about not seeing you.”

Dimitri cleared his throat. “So, you play basketball?” he asked, changing the topic, before I laid into my brother. That’s where the conversation was headed, because Knox and I both knew Esme was a great girl.

“Used to.”

“Your fadeaway still looks decent for a quitter.”

Dimitri’s words had me snapping my gaze to Knox. And I saw his face reddened. “I’m not a quitter.”

“You just said you used to play,” Dimitri continued.

“Yeah. I did. I can’t now.” Knox puffed up his chest.

“Oh, you break a bone?” Dimitri lifted an eyebrow, waiting.

“Wow, you’re extremely inquisitive today.” I wanted to steer him away from this particular conversation, but Dimitri wasn’t even looking at me.

“I’m working with my dad now. Plus, I’m just not into it anymore.”

“Why’d you go out front to shoot hoops then? Didn’t make varsity and quit?” Dimitri was egging him on. We all knew it. But I saw some of the determination in Knox’s eyes that I was used to, saw a little of the competitor he used to be.

“Man, I made varsity freshmen year. Could now if I tried.”

“So, you’re either a quitter or not good enough. Which is it?”

“Dimitri.” I glared at him.

My brother didn’t let me say anything though. He grabbed the ball and said, “One-on-one. Let’s go right now.”

A smile more genuine than I’d ever seen whipped across Dimitri’s face. “I’m going to beat you, kid.”

They both walked outside, leaving me standing in the kitchen wondering what had just happened.