Chapter 19

Nineteen: Killian Killian's p.o.v.

I couldn't sit still. Every time I moved, her scent seemed to grow stronger. I had searched every partof my office and couldn't find the source. It was almost like she had left something of hers in herejust to drive me crazy, and I was completely oblivious as to where she had hidden it.

I had known having her in my office was a bad idea, but now I was positive that nothing good couldcome from having Natalie around.

The only thing I could admit out loud was that I enjoyed having her in my bed. Before her, I slept foronly a few hours a night, and they were not consecutive. Now with her in my arms, I could sleep theentire night, and most of the morning if I wanted to.

But that was it. I had to keep reminding myself that Natalie was not here for anything more than theupcoming battle and our future children, my heirs. Everything else I needed to force to the back ofmy mind and lock it away.

I could not let her in. Loving her would be too painful in the end.

Joselin appeared before my desk. Her scent had been revolting to me today, and I had beenshorter-tempered with her than usual. Everything about her seemed to piss me off, and I didn't wanther near me. It was something that hadn't happened before during our long friendship. I knew shewas getting frustrated by my attitude, but she bit her tongue for the first time in her life.

I was surprised when the most intoxicating scent came from her, and I reached over the desk andgrabbed her arm, lifting her hand to my face. I knew that scent anywhere. It had been burned intomy brain since I first met her. It filled my office even after I was left alone in it.

It was my mate.

Her scent was more potent, toxic almost, and I felt myself losing control. My eyes burned as mybeast came forward. As I unconsciously took in a deeper breath, I moved up her hand to herforearm. A growl ripped free from my chest at the sudden change from sweet to rancid. Joselin'ssmell was offensive today when she normally had barely any scent.

"It's Natalie,” She said with annoyance, seeming uncomfortable as I released her hand, and shewiped it on her thigh.

The uncertainty about what to say had her mouth opening and closing before she took a deepbreath and settled herself. "What I'm going to say, please hear me as a friend and not as yourunderling. I mean no disrespect, but you're going to break her, lan. Natalie is in her heat right now,and she's not doing well. She just accused me of having an affair with you behind her back. Her eyeswere glossy and crazed. For a moment, I thought she was going to shift because she was so angry.You pushing her away is only hurting her.”

I stood up straighter at her words, the realization sinking down in my gut that maybe I had beenpushing her too far. There had to be a balance where I could protect myself and keep her happyhere.

It wasn't like I could kick her out after the battle. I needed a queen. I needed an heir. I needed amate. But I wanted it to be her. I hated to admit it, even to myself, but she was it for me. She wasthe only one I wanted to be with. That was how I knew it would kill me when she left me or cheatedThe last thing I wanted to do was drive her insane the way my mother had done to my father.Whether I admitted to it or not, I was starting to care for her, and that was a dangerous game. Themore she forced her way into my life and heart, the easier it would be for her to destroy me. "She isfine."

The words left my mouth, but even I didn't believe them. Natalie had been pushing, trying to get toknow me or, at the very least, be around me, and I pushed her away each time. I had no reason tobelieve that she would be okay during her first heat, especially if she was going through it alone."No, Killian. She's really not.” Joselin said as she sat back in the chair on the other side of the desk."You need to mark her already. At the very least, go fuck her so she can stop stinking up the castle.Your men are fighting over her as we speak, and you're sitting her while she is all alone and in pain.”"She is mine!" I growled as I stood, towering over Joselin. The thought of anyone else fighting overher when she was not theirs to win made me furious.

"She's waiting for you." She said with a smirk before flickering out of the room.

My anger drove me forward, and I rushed out of the office. As soon as I hit the hallway, I could smellher scent thickening around me. It was pulling me in, designed specifically for me. But by thesounds of the other men in my pack, I knew it was calling to them too. She was their queen.

They would be pulled in, wanting to serve her...to please her.

I let out a loud roar. Satisfaction filled me as it echoed through the castle, warning every man andwoman from laying a hand on my mate. She wouldn't want them, not now that she had found hersoulmate, but it didn't mean that her scent wouldn't lure them to her.

A young pup rounded the stairs in his half-shift state as I reached the banister, moving past ittoward my room. His red eyes were frantic as he sniffed the air, following the scent of my mate. Mywoman.

I didn't spare it a second thought as I grabbed the teenager by the back of the neck and threw himover the banister. He would live, but the impact of his landing would do him good to help himregain control of his beast. 2 If he had managed to get past the guards, then who else had?

I moved faster, feeling my heart thumping quickly in my chest as I approached the siren that wascalling me to her. Joselin stood at the entrance to my wing of the castle, finishing what appeared tobe a barrier spell before vanishing once more.

The thick air enveloped me like gelatin as I moved through it to the other side of her spell. I heardNatalie's heart beating quickly, and I could practically taste her skin the closer I got.

A thud followed by a yelp of pain sounded from behind me, and I looked over my shoulder to seeanother one of my guards in their Lycan form, laying on the ground outside of the barrier. Knowinghe had been coming after my mate, had me wanting to turn back and rip his throat out.

But the sudden drop in her scent made my heart stop. Had someone made it into the room beforeme? Was she with another man? 1 The jealousy that pumped through me helped me to understand where she was coming from aboutJoselin and me. Even the idea that she was with someone had me shifting into my Lycan form, readyto challenge them to the death.

I threw the door open, my hand leaving an indent on the metal of the brass doorknob, and I rushedpast the sitting room to the bedroom. I could feel the pull urging me forward to follow her scentinto the bathroom. So, I did.

Her head was thrown back against the tub as she lay back in the water with her brown hair pulledoff her neck in a bun. I could see the peaks of her breast just below the surface as I stood in thedoorway. But it was the slight ripple in the water, signaling movement that had my attention. Herarm was completely submerged, but she had one leg up and on the edge of the tub. Goosebumpscovered her flesh as she let out a low moan, increasing the speed of her hand between her legs.

My body shifted back as I stared in awe at the beautiful siren touching herself in the water beforeme. She was mesmerizing, and I took a step forward when she moaned out my name softly."Killian." It was a soft sigh of pleasure as much as it was a plea for help. My clothes had ripped uponmy shift, and I stood naked and hard in the cold bathroom as I watched my mate continue to rubher clit.

My hand moved down to grab my cock, pumping it slowly in time with the movements of her hand."Yes, little one?" I asked lowly, feeling myself grow impossibly harder in my hold as she sat upsuddenly in the water, her breast on full display as she stared at me in shock. Her wide eyes and lipsopen in surprise made her the picture of pure temptation. 1 The water ran down her neck and chest, and I licked my lips, wanting nothing more than to followthe trail with my tongue.

".." She stammered, knowing there was no way to explain what I had seen beyond telling the truth."You seem to have some confusion about my loyalty,” I said as I moved forward, releasing my cockand enjoying the way she swallowed hard at the sight of it. "Stand."

The order was not that of a king, but that of her mate.

She did as I asked, and I watched as she pulled herself up, a thin layer of steam rising from her skinfrom the heat of it in the cold water. I eyed the newly exposed areas of her body, from the curve ofher delicate waist to the neatly trimmed hair between her legs, to the toned legs themselves.

I felt the desperate need to have them wrapped around my hips as I drove into her, but instead, Iheld out my hand, watching as she shivered when our skin touched before helping her out of thetub.

"There is no question about it. I know why I am here.” The bitterness sank into her tone, but as Iwalked around her to enjoy the view of her slender neck and the dimples above her pert ass, I couldsmell her heat returning. She was enjoying my attention on her. She wanted my touch on her skin toease away the pain and warmth I would be happy to give up, but I also prayed to the Goddess that Natalie would understand that itwas just for tonight, just for her heat. It couldn't mean anything more than that, not to me at least.As much as I wanted to keep the distance between US for as long as possible, I was driven purely bymy animalistic need. I knew I would regret it in the morning, but tonight I would be breaking myown rules. I needed this woman more than I needed to breathe. I wanted to sink deep into her andfuck her until the world stopped spinning.

"You are here as my mate,” I said as I stopped in front of her, grabbing the back of her neck gently,my fingers tangled in her hair. She moved with me willingly as I tilted it back until I could brush mylips against hers easily as I spoke. "I will always be loyal to my mate. I expect the same.” 2 Natalie blinked once, glancing into my glowing red eyes as she let out a deep breath andwhispered. "Until my last breath.”