Chapter 35

Sky Wongravee

I sit on my bed, the room growing quiet around me, and I can't help but replay everything Nani said earlier. His words sit in my chest, not heavy, but there, like a reminder of everything we've been through. We've never been good at talking about this stuff, and now that we've had this conversation, I'm not sure where we go from here.

I thought I had it all figured out. I thought I was doing okay. I had May to distract me, pull me back into something that felt normal. The laughter came easier. The weight on my shoulders lifted a little.

But then, there was Nani.

The thing is, I've never seen him like this before. I never imagined he'd feel the way he does, especially after the mess we made with that kiss. I didn't think I could hurt him that much. I never wanted to.

And yet, here we are.

I remember that stupid comment I made months ago, the one about us getting married if we were still single. It was meant to be a joke, but Nani's reaction? The way his face flushed, the way he fumbled over his words before Dew excused him... It sticks with me.

I didn't think anything of it back then, but now? Maybe I should've paid more attention. I don't know.

I wasn't looking for anything beyond friendship with him, and I know that. Nani's my best friend. Always has been. But hearing him say what he felt? It's confusing.

Deep down, there's this nagging thought—what if I've lost Nani?

It's not about guilt, really. It's more about knowing that things are different now, and I don't know how to fix it. I never wanted to hurt him like this, but at the same time, I don't regret my feelings for May. It doesn't mean Nani was wrong in how he felt, though.

Tomorrow, when I meet him, I don't know what I'm walking into. Will we be able to talk and move on from this? Or will this be the end of something I didn't even realize I was scared of losing?

I can't let this be the end of us, but I also don't know if I can make things right. All I can do is show up and see if we can find a way forward.

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The cafeteria is as loud as ever, the usual chaos surrounding our table. Dew and Win are arguing about something dumb, probably another one of their random bets. Joong and Dunk are having their daily debate over who's the superior Mario Kart player, while Aou and Boom are making fun of them for taking it too seriously. Perth and Santa are in their own little world, sharing earbuds and watching something on Santa's phone, occasionally laughing between themselves.

It's comfortable. Familiar.

I slip into my seat, tuning into the conversation just as Dunk rolls his eyes.

"Joong, you've never beaten me in a fair race. Just accept it."

"Because you cheat," Joong fires back.

Aou snorts. "Bro, it's Mario Kart. There's literally no way to cheat."

"Exactly," Dunk grins. "He just sucks."

"Shut up."

Boom leans over to me. "Sky, settle this—who do you think is the better player?"

I shrug. "I don't know, man. I've never seen either of you play."

Joong gasps. "Then that means we need to settle this once and for all. Tournament at my place?"

"Count me out," Win says, sipping his drink. "I'm not third-wheeling you and Dunk's competitive tension."

Dew smirks. "And I'm not letting my son get corrupted by this nonsense."

Nani, who has been relatively quiet up until now, scoffs. "I'm literally older than you, Dew."

"Doesn't change the fact that you are," Win says, ruffling Nani's hair.

Nani swats his hand away, shaking his head, but there's something in his expression—a flicker of something more distant. He's smiling, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes.

I don't get the chance to ask him about it before the cafeteria doors swing open.

And then I see her.

May walks in, chatting with a friend from another class, her hair pulled back into a loose ponytail, her uniform slightly rumpled like she's had a long morning. She glances around the room, and before I even think about it, I call out—

"Hey, May!"

The second the words leave my mouth, I feel the shift.

The conversation at the table doesn't stop completely, but there's a noticeable pause—like everyone collectively took a second to register what just happened before forcing themselves to keep talking.

I ignore it.

May turns, spotting me, and a bright smile spreads across her face. She says something to her friend before making her way over, her steps light and easy.

Dew takes a slow sip of his drink, his expression unreadable. Win leans back in his seat, watching May approach like he's preparing for an unpleasant conversation. Dunk and Joong exchange a glance before Dunk suddenly finds his food way more interesting. Aou and Boom are less subtle, rolling their eyes in sync. Perth and Santa? They don't even try to pretend.

I pretend I don't notice.

"Hey," May greets, her voice warm as she slides into the empty seat beside me. "What's up?"

"Not much, just the usual," Dew says, the casualness in his tone just a little too forced.

I glance at Nani.

He's still smiling, but he's not really here. His hands rest on the table, his fingers idly playing with a loose thread on his sleeve. His gaze flickers between me and May, but he's careful—so careful—to keep his expression neutral.

I've known Nani long enough to recognize it for what it is.

A distraction.

A mask.

I don't know what to say. So I don't say anything.

Instead, I turn back to May, keeping the conversation moving, trying to pretend I don't notice the way the atmosphere around the table has shifted.

The others go back to their usual chatter, but the energy is different—like they're tolerating her presence rather than actually including her. They don't go out of their way to talk to her, don't engage much when she speaks. It's subtle, but it's there.

And Nani...

Nani just listens.

Or at least, he pretends to.

His eyes stay on his hands, his smile stays in place, and I know—deep down—I know he's not okay.

But he won't say it.

Not here.

Not now.

And maybe... not ever.