Chapter 38 Surprise!

"My second relationship isn't a pretty story. There are very few good memories to outweigh the bad ones."

Pierce paused, but I stayed quiet. I didn't think he was looking for a response nor did I think there was one. At least nothing appropriate. I waited patiently as he gathered his, if his expression was anything to go by, obviously grim thoughts.

"I met him about six months out of college. We had one of those romance story chance meetings, or so I thought." Pierce looked at me then with a disgusted twist of his lips. "It turned out there was nothing about our relationship that was chance. I just didn't know that. At least not for a while."

"We met. I fell. For close to a year I was a besotted fool."

Pierce paused again and I again remained silent. Mainly because I couldn't have spoken even if I wanted to. My stomach was twisting.

I hurt for him. It was obvious he had suffered. But I didn't think what I was feeling was all about him. Yes, I felt sympathetic but I was also feeling this strange anger and weird feeling in my gut.

As I had listened to him speak, I had felt overly sensitive to his story as if a small scalpel like knife was inflicting biting little wounds along my skin. His words made me hurt for him but they were hurting me, too. It was weird and confusing. Simple words had never physically affected me this way before.

Listening to him was not easy. It took real effort to make my face remain impassive. He was already visibly struggling to tell me his story. The story I had asked him to tell. The last thing I wanted was to show him I was struggling to listen. He deserved better than that from me.

I breathed deeply and remained expressionless, schooling my features to one of, I hoped, sympathetic patience and understanding. Pierce was always patient and encouraging with me. I wanted to offer the same to him. Though the knot in the pit of my stomach was naggingly annoying, I put it aside. Pierce warranted my full attention. I could think about these strange feelings later.

"Pierce?" I finally quietly prompted when he continued to remain silent.

He squeezed my hand in response and gave a self-deprecating smile.

"Sorry," he replied. "It's just not easy admitting what an idiot I was, not to mention easy target."

"Easy target?" I found myself repeating in stunned disbelief.

Pierce was anything but.

"My supposed relationship, was nothing but a scam. Our encounter had not been by chance. There was nothing destiny related. Fate was not magically involved. I had been scouted and hunted and caught in the proverbial honey trap, or you could say his money trap."

The light bulb clicked on in my head. I was finally understanding what he was saying. From his dark expression it seemed he still had more to say. That pit in my stomach expanded. This time though the misery I was feeling was all for him.

"I found out the truth the worst possible way. Something right out of a drama," Pierce continued with a humorless laugh. "I wanted to surprise him with a weekend getaway. I'd told him I had to work late but was in fact making arrangements. I drove to his place without calling to pick him up. You know? Surprise! Only the surprise was on me. Or should I say shock!"

I swallowed. My heart dove to my knees. I could only imagine what he must have felt walking in on his lover with another. I squeezed his hand in silent support.

"I knocked. I remember having a huge smile on my face. I couldn't wait to see his expression when he saw me, as he had been pouty when I had told him I had to work. I had played out all sorts of scenarios in my head how it would go down. My imagination just wasn't that good."

Pierce looked at me with an uncomfortable expression. His hesitation confused me a bit as I couldn't imagine anything worse than what he was already telling me.

A moment later I realized I was as naïve as Pierce had once mentioned.

There could always be worse.

"When he opened the door, he was only wearing boxers. As he swung the door open, he was calling out, 'we've been waiting for you,' and was giggling in this weird high-pitched way. There was laughter ghosting down the hallway from his bedroom as he yelled."

"I was shocked. I just stood rooted to the floor. I can't begin to explain how completely confused I was. I knew what my eyes were seeing. I knew what my ears were hearing. I even knew what my nose was smelling. But no matter how smart I think I am; I have never felt dumber than I did in that moment. I couldn't comprehend the glaringly obvious facts staring me right in the face."

"Oh Pierce," I murmured, instinctively closing the space between us and gathering him into my arms.

I didn't care how unapproachable he looked at that moment. Despite his hands-off expression, I couldn't do anything else.

Pierce stiffened but only for a moment. Slowly he wrapped his arms around my slighter form and returned my embrace.

"It's all okay now, Jackson. I'm okay," he reiterated.

I scoffed and pulled my head back to look up at him. He smiled down at me and kissed my nose before sitting me back a few inches. I felt a little hurt at the distance he put between us but he kept hold of my hand. I realized then he wasn't finished with his story and I settled back, giving him the distance, he seemed to need to complete the telling.

As he spoke, I understood why.

"The surprises just kept on coming after he opened that door. But thankfully my brain finally started functioning. I'm quick so it didn't take long for all the pieces of the puzzle to find their places. The smell was definitely drugs. The sounds were definitely from multiple males hidden away from sight as they were in bedroom. My boyfriend was almost naked with several telltale marks on his body that I know I hadn't given to him. His shaken expression coupled with the multitude of evidence splayed before me revealed everything."

My mind bulked at the mental image. I put myself in Pierce's shoes and tried to imagine walking in on something like that. I couldn't. It was as Pierce had intimated. Something like that belonged on television and not real life.

"I'd looked at him in disbelief. I had almost demanded an explanation but then decided I had no desire to hear one. What did it matter anyway? What good would it do? I already felt crushed enough as it was. I had turned to walk away when the last, and I would have to say, most humiliating part of the entire experience happened."

I mentally shook my head. I again couldn't imagine things could get that much worse, but from his words and by his expression I could tell they had. I dreaded hearing it. I almost even told him to stop.

But another part of me thought this might actually be good for Pierce to share. Pierce being Pierce, with his notably small inner circle, I wondered if he had ever had the chance to get this off his chest, to verbalize the pain and release it out into the world, ridding himself of the poison a wound like this would undoubtedly leave festering inside him. With that hope, I remained silent as he continued.

"As I made to turn away, a laughing voice started talking from behind me. As I turned, my eyes connected with cruel humor. I was being laughed at. The man wasn't trying to hide it either. He was enjoying my reaction. I made to walk around him. By this point I just wanted out but my so-called boyfriend grabbed my arm. As he held onto me the other guy started talking, verbally twisting at the invisible knife embedded in my back."

"While my boyfriend tried to beg his way out of things his boyfriend, or should I say one of his four other boyfriends proceeded to tell me everything. I was a mark. They had all been together for years. They had a poly relationship. They were a family of sorts. I was the outsider. Or should I say the purse."

I felt my bottom lip tremble as Pierce wound down and I bit at it to stop the wobbly involuntary movement. My eyes pricked and I knew tears were not far off. I could not imagine how it would feel to have been so intimately manipulated to that extent. What had been done to Pierce had been cruel and selfish and immoral.

Totally and completely unforgiveable.

Dawning comprehension enveloped me. Pierce's story. Our first meeting at the club. His nasty insinuations. At the time they had seemed ludicrous and completely unfathomable. But in Pierce's life experience it was neither of those things. To him, those suggestions were quite plausible.

For Pierce it had been a been there done that development. A fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, fuck you kind of situation.

Pierce's behavior would never be considered okay but it could be considered understandable and it would most definitely be considered forgivable. On every level. He'd been traumatized. Even if he was okay now, like he said, that wasn't something that ever went away. There would be times, like that night, the memories surfaced.

Hopefully, gradually over time, they would finally go silent.

I reached my hand up and cupped Pierce's cheek.

"The parallels of that night with me and my friends and what you witnessed with your boyfriend, don't go unnoticed by me," I finally said with a rueful smile, trying to pull Pierce out of the dark place he had had to gone to in order to share his story with me.

He reciprocated with his own more mocking smile.

"It definitely didn't go unnoticed by me," he assured me and I shook my head at him.

"You need to work on your temper," I replied quietly.

It was my roundabout way of saying, hey I understand, but you still can't act like that.

"Work in progress," he replied, smiling a more humorous smile at me than the previous one.

I took that as his roundabout way of saying, I make no promises.

"In all seriousness," Pierce started with a tired sigh, sitting back and pulling me against him, his arms settling around me. "I had thought I was over it. I honestly have not thought of him or that in a long time. But when I saw you on the dance floor, sandwiched so intimately between your friends, the memories swooped in."

"I watched them with you in the club and they were so protective of you. They seemed to touch you freely. I even waited outside the club for you all to come out, on purpose. I wanted to prove to myself I was right, though the lord only knows why. And the way you all came out cemented my thoughts. The way they protected you. The easy touches. The familiarity that enshrouded all of you. It threw me back into the past and the nasty words came flying out of my mouth. Their reactions on your behalf just made me dig my heels in deeper and get nastier."

"That you did," I murmured, remembering that night.

"I'm sorry," Pierce whispered, bending down and kissing the back of my head. "I am really, really sorry for that night. I wish your first memory of me wasn't that."

I gave a sudden scratchy chuckle. "Well our first encounter was memorable, at least."

"It definitely gives me room for improvement," Pierce conceded.

"Understatement," I retorted, teasingly.

Pierce suddenly leaned in closer to me until his mouth was pressed up against my ear.

"Thank you for giving me the chance," he whispered back with undisguised warmth and sincerity. "You won't be disappointed."