: Chapter 12
A Long Time Coming
âAre you both there?â I say into the phone once I conference Huxley in.
âYes,â they say at the same time, and then Huxley adds, âThis better be fucking good. Lottie is waiting for me.â
âKelsey is cooking pancakes naked, so yeah, hurry the fuck up,â JP says.
God, their lives are so annoying . . . annoying because Iâm jealous. So fucking jealous.
âI need to talk to you guys because Iâm going to do something stupid. I can feel it. I need to come back to work. I need to distract myself with something, anything, please, just let me come back to work.â
âUhh . . . the desperation is thick. Whatâs going on?â JP asks.
âI almost fucked up,â I say. âOr maybe I did, I donât know, but fuck, itâs not good. Itâs really not good, so please just let me come back to work. Iâll wear a wig, a fake mustache, Iâll even do another job. Just anything to get me away from . . . from this hell.â
âA mustache, huh?â JP asks.
âTell us what the hell is going on,â Huxley says in that father-figure voice of his.
I take a deep breath while I squeeze the steering wheel of my car at a red light. I should be stressed by the goddamn lawsuit being hurled toward me. I should be worried that the Cane name is being disparaged. But no. Iâm stressed about the woman I love who I just told Iâd fuck hard enough to make her hoarse from orgasms. The fuck? But first . . . âI, uh . . . came to the conclusion that I have feelings for Lia.â
Thereâs silence.
And then, âI fucking told you he was going to figure it out in a week,â JP says. âSpending that much time with a girl youâre harboring feelings for while she attempts to plan a wedding with another man, yeah, that will give you a swift kick to the scrotum.â
âCan we not play the I-told-you-so game?â I ask.
âBut we did,â Huxley says. âWe told you this would happen.â
âOkay, great, wonderful, you two are modern-day matchmakers. Congratulations. Now, can we please move on?â
âGlad you can be big enough to acknowledge that,â JP says.
âHow does this pertain to work and fucking up?â Huxley asks.
âI canât be around her anymore. I need reasons I canât help with the planning of her wedding.â
âSo youâre just going to crush her like that?â JP asks. âDude, thatâs not cool.â
âWhat the hell am I supposed to do?â I ask. âI just told her if she was mine, Iâd never let her go. I would fuck her every chance I had.â
âWhoa, what?â Huxley says.
âUh, dude, thatâs a bit extreme for not even admitting your feelings. How? Did you just announce that youâd fuck her out of the blue?â
âNo.â I drag my hand over my face. âWe were talking about the honeymoon phase, and I mentioned how I wouldnât let her out of my sight but quickly changed it to my girl. But then, after that, she tells me that she and Brian barely have sex because heâs tired, and I just fucking lost it. All I could think about was how this lucky son of a bitch was taking advantage of her and how he didnât deserve her, and I told her that if she was mine, weâd be fucking all the time, so yeah . . . there you have it. I need to not be around her anymore, and if I could return to work, that would be great. Thank you.â
âYou canât come back to work yet,â Huxley says. âNot until Taylor says itâs clear.â
âSo what am I supposed to do? Keep being her man of honor when clearly all I want is her?â
âYou could do some next-level shit and jeopardize her wedding so she doesnât get married at all,â JP says.
âDonât listen to him,â Huxley cuts in. âThatâs a terrible fucking idea. Why donât you just tell her how you feel?â
âPlease,â I scoff. âWe all know how that goes. I tell her how I feel, she doesnât feel the same way. She ends up patting me on the shoulder, and then we donât talk anymore.â
âWhere are you getting your evidence from? Movies and TV shows?â
âOf course, where else?â I ask as I pull into the parking lot of the trailhead.
âProbably not your best source of reality,â JP says. âI think Huxley is right. You tell her, and if she doesnât feel the same way, at least you know, and you can move on.â
âWhat about that Birdy girl? Canât you move on with her?â Huxley asks.
âIâm about to tell her I canât see her anymore because I like someone else, and I donât want to lead her on. Also, Iâve kissed her twice now and felt nothing, and I think itâs because I want Lia and only Lia.â
âThat much is obvious,â JP says.
I press my fingers into my brow and say, âSo what should I do?â
âWe already told you what to do,â Huxley says. âTell Lia how you feel. If you donât, youâre going to regret it.â
âBut sheâs on this mission now to do things before she gets married. What am I supposed to do about that?â
âWell, if you think she might not feel the same way about you, then help her understand how youâre a better match for her than Brian,â JP says.
âYeah, I agree,â Huxley chimes in.
âHow do I go about doing that?â
âBe everything Brian is not,â JP says. âWithout crossing the line, obviously, you canât go fuck her and be like, see, I fuck you, and Brian doesnât.â
That actually makes me chuckle. âI would never do that, but I get what youâre saying.â I lean my head against the headrest and ask, âDo you really think it could work?â
âNever know until you try,â Huxley says.
âAnd I just want to state for the record one more time about how right we were about this.â
âShut the fuck up,â I say, causing them both to laugh. âI hate you.â
âNo, you donât,â Huxley says. âYou just hate that weâre always right.â
âYeah, that too. Okay, Birdy is here for our hike. Got to go.â
âBe gentle with her,â JP says.
âNo, I thought I would kick dirt at her and tell her to get lost.â
âNot recommended,â Huxley adds right before I say bye and end the call.
I look out the window where Birdy steps out of her white SUV wearing a matching set of maroon biking shorts and sports bra. And from where Iâm sitting, I can see a small bird pattern on them.
Fuck.
I squeeze my eyes shut again.
I donât want to make her feel bad.
But Iâm going to. Thereâs no way around it. She definitely thinks weâre about to have a fun birdwatching hike. How do I tell her otherwise?
Grumbling to myself, I get out of my car just as Birdy steps up.
âHey, you,â she says in a cheery voice just as her hand lands on my chest, and she stands on her toes to press a kiss to my jaw. âHow are you?â
Fucking awful.
âGood.â I tack on a smile. âUh, I like your outfit, very themed for birdwatching.â
âI told you it was good.â She beams up at me, and I realize I must tell her now. I canât go on this hike and pretend everything is fine and then tell her after. That would be brutal. She must sense my uneasiness because she asks, âIs everything okay?â
I pull on my hair and shake my head. âNo.â
âOh, whatâs going on?â
âCome talk with me,â I say as I take her hand in mine and lead her around to the back of my SUV and open the trunk. I take a seat, and she does the same. âIâve been a fucking idiot, Birdy, and I dragged you into my idiocy.â
âWhat do you mean?â she asks.
I look up at her and say, âI like someone else, and I thought that maybe if I just ignored it, I wouldnât think about it. But itâs become more and more clear that I like this person, and I donât want to lead you on.â
âOh,â she says, looking down at her hands and making me feel like the absolute shithead that I am. âIâm guessing itâs Lia, isnât it?â
I could deny it, but whatâs the point in lying?
âYeah,â I say softly. âLike I said, itâs really fucked up, and I canât pretend the feelings arenât there while I try to date you at the same time. It wouldnât be fair.â
âI appreciate that,â she says softly and then asks, âDoes she know?â
âNo,â I say quickly. âNot even a clue.â
âAre you going to go for it?â When her eyes connect with mine, I realize at that moment who Iâm talking to, who set me up with her. Brian. Fuck.
âUh . . . no,â I answer, but the lie even sounds stupid to my ears.
âI wonât say anything,â she says. âI donât care for Brian all that much. I think heâs a tool, and honestly, I think Lia could do better. I donât know what she sees in him.â
âMe either,â I say softly.
âYou should go for it,â Birdy says. âYou two have such a strong connection.â
âThatâs nice of you, but you donât have to talk about this. I know itâs got to be weird.â
âSure, itâs weird, and am I disappointed? Of course. I think youâre amazing, Breaker, and if you asked me out on a date, I would one hundred percent go, but I also know when a guy isnât interested or is hung up on someone else. I had a feeling that might be the case. I could just tell by the way you two interacted and the way you spoke about her. Something is there, and I really think you should try to figure it out.â
âBut sheâs getting married in four weeks. Doesnât that make me look like a giant ass? Like I couldnât have figured this out sooner? Now Iâm going to come swooping in and tell her how I feel? It doesnât seem appropriate.â
âNot sure there is a standard for an appropriate time to tell someone you love them. But the last thing you want to do is not tell her and regret it forever.â
âThatâs what my brothers said.â
âDid they also say I told you so? Seems like something they would pick up on.â
âYeah, pretty sure everyone picked up on it besides Lia and me.â I sigh heavily. âJesus, Birdy, Iâm just so sorry.â
âDonât be.â She takes my hand in hers. âIâd rather you tell me the truth. Frankly, this might be the most real conversation Iâve ever had, and I appreciate it.â
âWell, thanks for being so cool about it.â
âDo you still want to go on a hike? Maybe we can talk about Lia, and I can help you.â
âYou donât want to do that.â
âI do,â she says convincingly. âIâm all about true love, and I think you and Lia have that. She just needs to see it too. Plus, I canât waste this outfit.â
âTrue,â I say as I hop off the back of the trunk. I hold my hand out to her and help her down. âCan I give you a hug?â
âOf course,â she says as she pulls me in.
âThank you for understanding.â
âThank you for being honest.â When we push away, she says, âNow, if you happen to have a single friend who is kind, sweet, doesnât hurt to have some looks, and can be as honest as you, then I would love to meet him.â
âYou know . . . I just might have someone in mind for you.â
Her eyes light up. âReally?â
I shut the trunk of my car and nod. âYeah, heâs a former baseball player. What do you think about that?â
âUm, I say yes, please!â
I chuckle, and we head up toward the hiking trail.
âGOLDFINCH, RIGHT?â Birdy asks.
âThatâs right,â I say, feeling like a proud teacher. âLook at you getting it after the twelfth time.â
She chuckles. âWell, donât say you canât teach me anything. Clearly, Iâm a master at birdwatching.â
âClearly.â We make our way up the hill, almost to the crest. âIâm irritated that we havenât seen more variety.â
âWell, you know, the crow and goldfinch have sealed the deal for me on this birdwatching thing. I think Iâm an avid fan forever.â
âYour sarcasm is easily detectable.â I let my binoculars rest on my chest. âIf this was a real date, Iâd be thoroughly embarrassed by the showing. Here, Iâm taking you on some exotic bird tour, and we find a gaggle of crows and a dozen goldfinches.â
âCould have been worse, could have been just the crows.â
âVery true.â When we reach the crest of the hill, we pause and take a second to check out the view of the city.
âNot too bad,â Birdy says as she finds a boulder and takes a seat on it. âCare to join me?â
I take a seat as well. âIâm glad we still went on the hike. I think itâs helping clear my head.â
âGood, which means you might be ready and open to talk about all things Lia.â
âEhhh, not sure thatâs the case.â
She bumps her shoulder with mine. âCome on, I have some insight. Iâm a girl, and I know Brian. I could give you some pointers.â
âYeah?â I ask. âI guess that wouldnât be too bad to maybe . . . see what you have to say.â
âGlad youâre open to it.â She chuckles. âFirst of all, you need to know Brianâs weaknesses, and I will tell you right now that communication is one of them. Heâs also a workaholic, heâs not very thoughtful, and even though he proposed to Lia, it certainly wasnât his idea. It was his momâs because she wasnât happy with him not being married yet. Do I think he loves Lia? Of course, but do I think he could marry anyone? Also, yes. I donât think the ability to deeply love and be in love with someone is in his bones. Iâve seen it with his girlfriends growing up. They were more like accessories than anything.â
âYeah, I got that feeling from him. He and Lia started dating not long after she lost both of her parents, and I believe there was comfort in having him around for that type of affection I couldnât give her.â I wince and say, âPlease donât say that to anyone. I donât want Lia to find out Iâm breaking her trust.â
âDonât worry, Breaker. Iâm on your side. I wonât say anything . . . especially since youâre dangling a baseball player in front of me.â
I chuckle. âA good one at that.â
âIâm counting on it, but seriously, I think one of the best things you can do is be there for her more than you already are. Knowing Brianâs relational deficits, why not emphasize your strengths in those areas? She knows you. But is she aware of the man youâd be in a romantic relationship?â
âThatâs what my brothers said.â
âYour brothers are smart. And do everything with her, maybe even flirt just a touch.â
âI donât want to cross the line.â
âThen donât, but you should subtly let her know that youâre attracted to her. Start hinting at how you feel so that when you do tell her, this isnât a total shock, and she doesnât have some assumption that youâre trying to ruin her wedding. Not that I think Lia would process information that way, but just in case.â
âYeah, thatâs actually really smart.â I kick some dirt away. âFuck, this feels terrifying.â
âWell, feel free to call me anytime and ask for advice. I think you have a leg up on Brian. The only thing that could hold you back is her fear of facing the truth. And the truth is, I donât think she truly loves Brian. Iâve seen how she interacts with you and how she interacts with him. Thereâs warmth when you two are together, a connection. I donât see the same thing with Brian.â
âI donât either.â I drape my arm over Birdyâs shoulder and say, âWeâre going to have to stay in touch, you know. I really appreciate your honesty and help right now.â And hope Iâm not putting my trust in the wrong person.
âJust promise me, when you two get married, because I know itâs going to happen, invite me and offer me a plus-one.â Thatâs something I can do.
âI very well might dedicate a toast to you if this all works out. You gave me a bout of confidence I wasnât feeling this morning.â
âIf you ever need someone to pump you up for overtaking Brian, Iâm your girl. He might have introduced you to me, but he still is an idiot.â
âYup, canât disagree with you there.â
We both laugh and then stand from the boulder. I was right all along. Brian is a douche.
âShall we head back? The birds are letting us down today,â I say.
âYes, and we can go over all the ways you can be flirtatious without crossing the line. Itâs time for the Win Your Girl Bootcamp. You in?â
âTeach me all the things, wise one.â
Stopped by Masala Palace and grabbed some chicken tikka, reshmi kabab, paneer korma, and garlic naan. You in?BREAKER:
Are you kidding me? I think I just drooled reading that text message. Iâm home, want me to prepare the gameboard and table?Lia:
Obviously.Breaker:
On it. Please choose your Plunder ship color.Lia:
Why are you asking? You know Iâm always green.Breaker:
Youâve lost the last three times, so I didnât know if you wanted to change it up. Maybe switch your luck.Lia:
Green for life.Breaker:
Okay, prepare to be annihilated. Also, I have a surprise to show you when you get here.Lia:
Yeah, does this surprise happen to be one of the things youâre checking off your list?Breaker:
Yes.Lia:
Well, I canât wait. See you soonBreaker:.
FOOD IN HAND, I step off the elevator of our apartment building and head right to my front door. After Birdy and I made it down the hill, I gave her a hug goodbye and then traveled back up the hill myself, this time thinking about everything. Letting my mind wander, my mind process, ruminating on my true thoughts and feelings.
First and foremost, I love her. I let that sink in. I let myself sit in my feelings and understand them. Lia is the most precious person in my life. Sheâs my ride or die. She means everything to me.
Sheâs my girl.
After I let myself accept that, I went on to accept that everyone is right. I need to tell her about my feelings, but I need to ease her into it. It might scare her if I jump out at her with these feelings.
Also, I need to give her time to check her goals off her list. I donât want to get in the way of that. I want her at her best when I approach her with my feelings, which will give her time to adjust to the new way Iâll approach our friendship.
After some time up on the hill and just living in the moment, I made my way back down again and ordered food, knowing Lia wouldnât be able to say no to Indian food. Itâs one of her absolute favorites.
With excitement in my chest, I reach my door, turn the knob, and enter, half expecting Lia to be standing there, waiting for me. When sheâs not, I call out, âHey, Iâm here.â
âIn the bedroom,â she says. âCome here.â
Confused but also excited, I drop the food off at the table and make my way to my bedroom, where the door is cracked open. Whatever she wants to show me, she sure is making a big deal about itâwhich I love.
I push the door open and glance in. Thatâs where I find Lia standing in the middle of the bedroom, her hands clasped together in front of her. Sheâs wearing a pair of leggings and a crop topânot her normal type of shirt since it shows off a touch of her stomach, but it looks great on her. Really good on her, but thatâs not whatâs gathering my attention. Nope. Itâs that her long red hair has been cut and dyed. Thin blonde streaks are woven through her hair that now sits just above her shoulders, with long flowy bangs and messy curls that fit her personality so well.
âHoly . . . shit.â
She is wearing a large smile as she says, âDo you like it?â
âOphelia,â I whisper while I take a step forward. âJesus Christ, you look hot.â
Her smile glows even brighter. âReally?â
I close the space between us and reach out to touch her short locks. âYeah,â I say breathlessly.
âItâs a little spunky, but I feel like a new woman with all that hair lifted off me, and I thought the highlights would be fun, but I kept them minimal because I still like my red hair.â
I take her all in as my heart beats wildly in my chest. Jesus fuck, she was gorgeous before, but now, I donât know if Iâll be able to keep my hands to myself.
And before I can stop myself, I tell her exactly whatâs on my mind.
âYou look fucking sexy. Not that you didnât before, but Jesus fuck, Lia. You look so fucking incredible. I love it.â
âThank you,â she says, a light blush staining her cheeks. âI sent a picture to Brian, still waiting to hear back from him. I hope he likes it as much as you do.â I bet the fuck he does. But I donât fucking care.
âHe will,â I say, still touching her hair as this wave of lust pours through me.
I want to sift my hand through her hair. I want to pull her close. I want to slip my hand under her crop top. I want to show her just how much this transformation turns me on. And itâs not just how she looks. Itâs her confidence, her smile, and how proud she is of herself. I want to pin her to my bed and run my mouth up and down her neck.
âAnd the outfit, itâs not too much, is it? I thought Iâd try something new.â
I look down at her crop top and the hint of her lace bra strap lining her shoulder as I shake my head. âNo, not at all. You look really fucking amazing, Ophelia.â
âOoo, two Ophelias. You must really approve.â
I swallow as I squeak out, âYeah, I do.â
I approve so much that Iâm struggling to remind myself that sheâs engaged, and that I need to take this slow. That I canât touch her the way I want to.
Pulling it slightly together, I ask, âBut more importantly, how do you feel?â
âWell, after your reaction, I feel really sexy.â
âYou should.â
âIâm just excited to see what Brian has to say.â Ah, yes, weâre all waiting on bated breath for Brianâs reaction. Did you hear the sarcasm in that? From the kitchen, her phone rings, and she glances up at me. âSpeak of the devil. I bet thatâs him. Iâll answer, and you can divvy out the food. Donât hoard the garlic naan.â
âWouldnât dream of it,â I say as she moves past me, and my eyes follow, falling straight to her rear end.
Fuck, would you look at that?
Bubbly, pert, all shown off in her skintight pants.
I swear the universe is testing me and will decide my fate on how I can control myself in this situation. My best friend, who Iâve always thought was incredible, turned into a smokeshow in a few short hours.
I reluctantly remove my eyes from her ass and fall in step behind her. While she reaches for her phone, I open up the bag of Indian food while my eyes casually drift in her direction, taking another opportunity to check her out.
Even her tits look incredible in that shirt.
Yup, the universe is testing me for sure.
âHey, Brian,â she says cheerfully. âHow are you?â
I try to block out her conversation because I donât want to hear him tell her how much he loves her new hair, so I focus on dividing up our food.
Thatâs until I hear her say, âWhat? You donât like it?â
That snaps me to attention. I forget all about the food and focus on her instead.
The confidenceâwhich was propping her chest out only a few moments earlierâvanishes.
Her beautiful smile that had stretched from ear to ear falters.
And I can feel the pained disappointment in her voice as she lowers her voice to reply.
âI wanted a change,â she says. âBecause I wasnât feeling myself. Yes, I feel like myself now.â She pauses and then turns away from me. âBrian, can we talk about this later?â Another pause and then, âFor how long? A week? I mean, itâs not like I can stop you, right? Business is business.â I crumple the paper bag in my hand as I continue to listen, my hatred for the man growing stronger. âYes, but weâre supposed to get married shortly. It would be nice if you were here.â It would be great if he wasnât. âOkay, fine. Yeah, talk to you later.â She hangs up and drops the phone to the side of her.
I wait a few moments, and when I notice sheâs not going to move, I decide to move to her. I sit down next to her on the couch, lift her eyes so sheâs looking at me, and thatâs when I notice the tears.
Iâm going to fucking kill him.
âIâm sure you got the gist of that conversation,â she says. âBut he didnât like my hair. Said it was a mistake.â
Yup, murder is in his future.
âHeâs wrong,â I say as I cup her cheek and swipe the tears away. âHeâs so fucking wrong because the moment I saw you, my heart skipped a beat, Lia. You look gorgeous. So fucking stunning that I had to remind myself that youâre my best friend.â
âYouâre just saying that.â She shakes her head.
âIâm not,â I say as my eyes fall to her lips and then back to her eyes. âIâd never just say something to appease you. Brian is an idiot because the fact that he canât see how you shine with this new hair, canât see your confidence, is his loss.â
âHe thinks his mom is going to be really mad.â Who the fuck cares? Is he still attached by his umbilical cord, or what?
âGood,â I say. âI hope she is mad. Gives us more fodder to fuck around with her.â
She lightly chuckles. âHeâs also going to be gone for a week, maybe more. I guess what heâs dealing with in San Jose requires more attention than he initially thought, so thatâs great. Not like weâre getting married or anything.â She sighs. âGod, why did he have to be such an ass? Maybe heâs stressed.â
âBeing stressed does not give anyone an excuse to be a dick. And he was a dick. Flat out. I need you to realize that. What he did was an inexcusable dick move. Do you hear me?â
She blinks and then nods. âYes.â
âGood. Now, weâre going to forget that just happened because we have a fun night planned, and Iâm not going to allow him to ruin that. Understood?â
âYes,â she says again, and then she falls into my chest. I wrap my arms around her and let her cry it out for a few more minutes. All the while, I think about what I would have done if Brian dismissed her boldness in person.
âYOUâVE BARELY TOUCHED YOUR NAAN,â I say. âThatâs unacceptable.â
âIâm sorry,â she says, pushing it to the side. âIâm just . . . not in the mood.â
âIs that why we havenât started playing Plunder?â
âMaybe I should go back to my place.â
âYeah, okay, as if I would let you do that,â I say. âWith that frown you canât seem to shake, no way would I allow you to just sulk away. Nah, sorry, youâre here with me for the rest of the night.â
Her eyes well up again, her lips tremble, and I tug on her hand to sit on my lap right as she bursts into tears again.
âIâM sorry about all of this,â she says quietly as we sit on my couch, watching old reruns of Family Feud.
After she ate a few more bites of her food, we packed everything up in containers and stuck it in the fridge. Since she wasnât in the mood for a board game, we both took a seat on the couch, where weâve been mindlessly watching reruns ever since. Iâve wanted to pull her in close several times, to stretch her legs across mine, to massage her feet, to do anything to touch her, and to make her feel better.
âDonât apologize,â I say.
âI know, but I didnât even ask you how your date with Birdy was. I just kind of bogarted the night with my issues.â
âYou didnât bogart anything. You have the right to be upset. Brian let you down, and you need to work through those feelings. Thereâs nothing to apologize for.â
âStill . . .â She turns toward me now. âHow was birdwatching with Birdy?â
I shrug casually, keeping my eyes on the TV as I say, âWe decided just to be friends.â
âWhat?â she asks. âWhy?â
I shrug again. âJust donât think I was into it like she was.â
âAnd she was okay with that? She said she was so excited about meeting you.â
âShe was,â I answer. âWe had a real honest conversation about it, actually. She could tell I wasnât feeling it and said it was okay. Sheâd rather know now than have me drag things on. We still went on a hike together. Did some talking, and I told her I would hook her up with one of my friends who I think would be perfect for her.â
âWho?â she asks as her lips lightly turn up.
âPenn.â
Momentarily forgetting her woes, Lia leans over and grips my forearm. âOh my God, Breaker, they would make the cutest couple.â
âI think so, plus Penn is really honest, and is the kind of guy sheâs looking for.â
âIs he dating?â
âI think so, just hasnât found anyone he wants to be serious about. I think that could be Birdy.â
âWell, look at you being a matchmaker. Iâm sorry it didnât work out, though, I thought you were looking for that kind of relationship,â she says.
âI was, but she wasnât what I wanted.â
âWhat do you want?â she asks.
You.
Everything about you.
Your soul.
Your mind.
Your heart.
Your body.
I want all of you, every last fucking inch of you.
âStill processing that. Iâll let you know when Iâm ready.â
âOh, you have an idea?â
âYes, I have an exact idea, but itâs going to take some finagling, so letâs put this conversation on pause.â
âOkay, thatâs not evasive at all.â
âNot at all.â I wink, which causes her to push me with her foot.
âThatâs annoying.â
âAt least weâve moved past Brian being a dumbass.â
She leans against the back of the couch. âHe really was being a dumbass, wasnât he?â
âHe was because from where I sit, heâs completely missed the fact that youâre a total smokeshow with that hair.â
âSmokeshow, huh? What was I before?â
âA smokeshow,â I answer. âBut without confidence. This new haircut just makes you shine brighter.â
âI was feeling really confident.â
âHeâs a certified troll for saying anything negative. Bet you he thinks youâre too hot now, like youâre out of his league, and heâs worried you might wander off.â
âWell, if he keeps acting like an ass, I very well might.â
Thatâs the spirit. Wander off, straight into my arms.
Not wanting to push the subject, I turn back to the TV and say, âAre we going to apply to be on Family Feud again this year? We have Kelsey and Lottie, who we can add to the team, as well as JP, so I think the odds are in our favor. Kelsey would have precise answers, JP would have the funny covered, and Lottie will cover the wildcard topic.â
âWeâll never get picked.â
âThatâs not the kind of attitude I like to hear. We must manifest this shit. Come on, we were born to be on Family Feud. You and me during fast money? Weâd annihilate. Steve Harvey wouldnât know what to do with himself because weâd destroy it. And who knows, Iâm not opposed to paying people off to get on the show.â
âI told you, weâll get on the show on our own merit, not what number you can write down in your checkbook.â
âYeah, but the checkbook would be a surefire way to make it happen.â
âWhere are your morals, Breaker Cane?â
âIffy at best when it comes to Family Feud.â
âI can see that.â Growing more serious, she says, âThanks for hanging out with me tonight, and being my own personal hype man about my hair and my outfit. It truly did make me feel special.â
âWell, you should feel special. Because you are. Iâll hype you all day, every day.â
âAnd that is why you are my best friend,â she says.
Yeah, if only I was so much more.