Chapter 17 - "Kane came into my room yesterday."

"I'm telling you, he was in my room yesterday!"

Charles searched through their gazes.

"He came to my room right before dinner. A nurse told me I had a visitor, and when I went, he was there and I fainted!" Charles explained, throwing his hands in the air. "And then, I woke up strapped to the bed and had another panic attack, and he kissed me!"

The two therapist looked at one another.

"And when he kissed me, it did calm down my panic episode, but it was still very scary. After that, he released my hands and gave me food, but I couldn't eat it because I was so scared, I couldn't even talk!" Charles shrieked, planting his palm on his forehead. "And after that, he told me he had to leave because he had a meeting, and then he kissed my forehead and when he did that, he put a needle in my shoulder and I fell asleep."

One of them raised an eyebrow.

"You have to do something. I don't care what it is, put bolts on my door if you need to, but I know he'll be back and I'm too scared of that happening."

Charles didn't have anything else to say, his heart rate starting to rise again and he didn't want to have another panic attack triggered, hence he fell into silence.

The two psychiatrist shuffled uneasily, before one of them cleared their throat. "The kiss that you mention, did you feel the sensations on your lips?" Charles rapidly nodded his head. "And you said you couldn't touch that person?"

"I couldn't because my hands were restraint."

Both of them jotted down notes in their notebooks.

"And you said it was the same person that murdered your close friend? He was present in the room with you?" the other one asked slowly.

He vigorously nodded his head.

"And you couldn't touch him?" Charles shook his head. "But you could hear him?" He nodded his head.

They both jotted down notes and looked at each other again, and those looks were agitating him even more that he couldn't stop himself from blaring, "What are you guys not telling me?!"

One of them exhaled a long sigh, finally closing her notebook and leaning forward with her hands on her knees. She sent a grave and thoughtful look towards Charles, her lips thinned into a tight line, before she finally confessed, "Those are visual and auditory hallucinations."

Charles thought he was going to puke.

He felt as though a sudden weight had caused his shoulders to slouch down, and he looked at his quivering fingers. There was no way that it had been an hallucination; Kane had been in the room. He was certain about it because the kiss he felt was something he had never felt before. Although his panic usually made him reach for his hair, this time, Charles' fingers had reached for his his lips, gliding his fingers across the dried flesh—there was no way that sensation wasn't real.

"Although rare, when people start new medication, they can have a wide variety of side effects, including hallucinations."

Charles didn't even look up to meet their gazes. "B-But...I haven't started any new medications."

"We prescribed to you a benzodiazepine called Zolpidem, remember?" The tension in their tone made Charles feel as though he was going to have a heart attack any second. "You have a history of insomnia, and those sleeping pills are effective, very potent, but can have severe side effects."

That was all a side effect of a medication?

That was all hallucinations from a drug?

Then why did the kiss feel so real?

It made his entire body calm down to the point that he could breathe; that had never happened before.

"What I am suggesting is that we try a different prescription, less dosage, less aggressive, a bit more subtle, and I feel as though that would definitely adjust those side effects."

He had felt Kane's lips though, they were warm and soft and made his entire face feel tingly. Kane had blown air into his mouth so harshly that his lungs were forced opened, his throat unclenched, and he could breathe again. There was no way none of that was real.

"Why don't you check the security footage?" Charles suggested, refusing to believe that this was all his mind toying with him. "I'm sure you'd see that I was walked to my bedroom by a nurse and then I—"

"The reason why we decided to have this meeting today was because of your claims. You spoke to your daily nurse this morning, remember? You told her about this, right?" Charles had said those things at breakfast, but he didn't think she would've repeated it before he had a chance to. "We checked the footage and there was no trace of anyone being in your room. The last person to walk into your bedroom was you, and you didn't come out until this morning."

As much as he didn't want to believe it, maybe it had been all in his mind because why would Kane even visit him and kiss him? Why would Kane want to help him through his panic attack or even bring him food? He was the leader of an upcoming troop; there was no way he would waste time visiting a sixteen year old mental patient. Charles planted his palms over his face; there was no way he was going to leave in a week if he kept bringing this up. They didn't believe him, but at this point, he didn't even believe his own self; was his mind telling him the truth?

"Let's try this new prescription and will revisit this conversation at the end of the week, alright?"

***

"How has it been here?"

Charles didn't want to make him worry, hence he forced a smile and said, "It's been fine."

Dante's eyes had been wandering around the daylight room, glancing at other parents and children and wishing dearly that he never had to return to a place like this after a week. "Are you sure?" he asked again, tilting his head and slowly bringing his gaze back to the droopy ones of Charles. Charles lips tightened; he was not a great liar and his fathers knew that. Hence, it was no surprise that he heard that knowing sigh from Dante who then asked, "Tell me the truth, baby."

"You're not going to believe me," Charles mumbled, planting his palm against his forehead. "To be honest, I don't even believe myself anymore."

"Tell me what's up."

Charles exhaled a long shaky sigh. There was a chance his father thought he was going mental, but he mostly cared about being truthful. And maybe talking to him would appease a bit of the distress he had felt ever since the meeting with his psychiatrists this morning.

"Kane came into my room yesterday." Dante's body stiffened. "At first, I fainted. And then when I woke up, I was strapped to the bed, I ended up having another panic attack, and then he..." Charles swallowed hard; part of him didn't want to share that with his father since none of them knew he was interested in men.

But Dante wasn't going to let it go. He leaned forward, his elbows on the table as he insisted, "He did what?"

After a short pause, Charles biting his bottom lip until he had enough courage, he admitted quickly, "He kissed me." When he said that, he felt totally humiliated that his cheeks flared red and he eyed his fidgeting fingers, unable to meet his father's gaze. "He helped stop my panic attack, then gave me food."

"Ah..."

That was all his father said. He didn't add onto it, neither did he dismiss it either; all Charles heard was Dante's shuffling in his seat. When Charles peeked for a split second, he noticed that Dante was staring into space, lost into his own thoughts and not paying attention to the fact that his son was with him.

Charles swallowed hard before he whispered, "No one in here believes me dad. They even checked the security footage and saw nothing, but I know what I felt."

Dante sighed, before mumbling, "Oh, don't they..."

At first, Charles was confused, uncertain why his father wasn't saying much and had completely gone quiet, not even looking at him. Until he recognized that look into his father's eyes, as if he was thinking and unable to make sense of all of this.

The same look the psychiatrist shared with one another.

Charles' teeth gritted before he spat under his breath, "They fucking spoke to you already, didn't they?"

Instantly, Dante's eyes returned to Charles, and immediately, Charles knew. "All they said was—"

"I knew it, you don't believe me either!"

"Keep your voice down Charles," Dante hissed under his breath, glancing around in a frenzy as he didn't want anyone else hearing this conversation. "It's not that I don't believe you, but you have to understand that," he leaned forward, "it's quite unlikely for the person who murdered Natalia, the leader of a troop, and the one who asked you instead to repay him the money, would come to a hospital to help you...and kiss you."

Charles' lips tightened into a line, his eyes widening in horror.

None of them believed him.

"I'm not saying I don't believe you, okay?" Dante tried to reassure through a shaky breath, seeing the light within Charles' eyes start to diminish the more he spoke. He was trying to salvage this conversation, but if this was hallucinations, he couldn't bear the thought of his son having these illnesses for the rest of his life. He exhaled a long sigh, not wanting to say the wrong thing but still wanting to tell him the truth. "All I'm saying is that it's...a farfetched story."

"I would like for you to leave."

"Charles, please," Dante worried, reaching forward to grab his son's wrists. "At least try to consider other options as well. I'm not saying you're making this up, but maybe the doctors are right, maybe your mind is playing tricks on you."

Charles stormed to his feet.

Dante did the same, hoping to prevent him from finishing their visitation time so early. "Charles, I'm just really scared, alright?" He reached for his shoulders, forcing a smile since a few eyes had turned towards them, although they couldn't hear the conversation.

He kept his voice down as he whispered, "I went nuts when I first witnessed someone die in front of me. The same thing happened to your father, and Lucius was the worst one. I'm telling you these things from a good place, Charles. I want you to get better and to be able to come home. Maybe they're not hallucinations, alright? But please just..." Dante leaned forward, pulling him into a hug and whispered in his ear, "...don't mention it to them so you can come back home, okay?"

No one believed him.

He was all alone.

What if Kane came back again?

What if this time, he did hurt him?

Or maybe this time he strapped him down and let the panic attack kill him?

"I need to go to bed."

He couldn't stand being in the daylight room, he couldn't stand being in front of his father anymore. Hence, after Dante heard how cold his son's tone had been, he slowly released him and watched him head towards the exit to the bedroom, pressing a button to let him leave without even looking back.

***

"We changed your medication, so you have to let us know in the morning if you still have those side effects, alright Charles?"

Charles didn't even respond to the nurse, pulling the blanket further above his head. After a long day of trying to convince everyone he wasn't insane—to no avail—he definitely needed plenty of rest.

"I do hope you have a good night, Charles."

And the door closed, and he was alone in his room again. Part of him was frightened that Kane was really going to return, another part of him hoped he did to prove that it hadn't all been a figment of his imagination. Although, he wasn't sure whether it was to prove it to the world or if he really wanted that kiss to have been real. He touched his lips again, wondering why he had felt such strange tingles along them when Kane pressed them against his; was it because they had helped him through his panic attack or because he genuinely had an emotionally reaction?

Charles shook his head, burying his face further into his pillow. He didn't want to think of any questions that could hinder his sleep, and he firmly closed his eyes, attempting to empty his mind as much as he could.

Thankfully, the new medication had worked, since he was in a deep sleep before he knew it. However, when he felt a trickle of liquid across his forehead, he instinctively wiped it with the back of his hand while shuffling to his side, still deep in his sleep. He felt it again, and again, until his eyes slowly opened and he blinked profusely.

When he realized what had been the cause, he was seconds from bursting into screams when a palm was shoved over his lips, preventing him from calling for help.

"Relax, it's just me," Kane smiled.