Chapter 22

Derek's POV

I woke up so many times throughout the night, because I couldn't really get comfortable. However, waking up constantly allowed me to check on Adrian damn near ever 30 minutes. I can't believe I kissed his forehead when he was asleep. I feel kind of bad, but I don't think he knows I did it.

He definitely doesn't know what I did to those Florida State hoes. I lowkey surprised myself by doing all of that, but sometimes when I'm so filled with anger I can do whatever, and I really just crashed out on all of them. No one hurts Adrian and gets away with that shit.

I'm just sitting on the couch in Adrian's room right now, watching TikTok while I wait for him to wake up. He had such a difficult day yesterday. Having to play an entire football game where he was being called the f slur the entire time, and then getting jumped by linemen is not a good day in any way.

"Derek? Are you awake?" I hear Adrian's soft voice call out for me.

"Yeah," I say, standing up and walking over to Adrian's bed. "How are you doing?"

"Better. My eye doesn't hurt that much. Does it look bad? Do I look weird with it?"

"You still have a black eye, but it doesn't look bad at all. You don't look weird or anything, Adri. Don't worry about it. You still look great," I state. He really does.

"Thank you. Do you just wanna chill today?" he asks and I nod.

"Of course. I don't want to do anything today. We can just stay here and watch football all day if you want. We have food and everything."

"Yeah, exactly," he smiles before sitting up, the blankets sliding off of him revealing his unclothed upper body. I looked away, but I saw enough. I've seen him shirtless, but not with the amount of feelings I have for him right now. His chest is so perfect, his arms are beautiful, and he has amazing abs.

"I think I'm gonna talk to Aaron about something, I'll be back in a little bit," I tell him and he nods at me.

"Cool. See you later. I'll leave the door unlocked."

"Okay. I'll be back soon."

I leave the room and find Aaron's room. I need to talk to him about my feelings. I can't believe I'm actually about to come out to someone, but I need to talk to someone I know well enough about Adrian. My feelings for him are not just a possibility anymore. They are real, and I really want him so bad. I want to hug him in a not platonic way. I want to kiss him so bad and just make him feel so good about himself.

I find Aaron and Cam's room and knock on the door. I wait for a few seconds and Aaron opens the door, wearing an oversized shirt and possibly only underwear. He looks like a complete mess, and his hair is crazy. I think I can put 2 and 2 together and understand that they fucked last night.

"Hey, Derek," he says tiredly.

"Uh, hey, Aaron. Can I talk to you for a little? It's kind of important."

"Yeah, yeah, for sure. Just let me get dressed and shower. Cam's in there right now. You can come in if you want," he says, opening the door wider.

They have a cute setup in here. They moved the beds next to each other so they can sleep together. That's kind of nice. It's still really weird to be around my best friend the night after they definitely did something involving dicks.

"We didn't do anything last night by the way, I just woke up and Cam's entire body was on top of me. That's why I look like this, sorry," Aaron says.

"No, uh, don't worry about it."

Cam soon gets out of the bathroom, without a shirt on, and I barely even care anymore. I have no feelings for him, or anyone else, for that matter, other than Adrian. He's the only person I want in this world anymore. Aaron goes into the bathroom right after Cam and soon Cam gets in a shirt.

"Hey, Derek, what's up?" he says, dapping me up.

"Not much, I just wanted to talk to Aaron."

"Did he let you know that he only looks like that because he invaded my side of the bed?"

"Uh, something like that, I guess," I reply.

"Good. Because I didn't somehow climb onto him while we were sleeping, that's definitely not what happened."

"Yeah. I, uh, I believe you bro." I really don't know what to say at this point.

"Well, I'm gonna go out and get some breakfast, so I'll see you later, I guess," Cam says, leaving the room.

I don't want to say 'thank God' but that was about to be a very awkward 20 minutes while Aaron was in the bathroom if it was just me and Cam. We don't know each other well enough to really make solid small talk. I blame myself for having feelings for him for so many years, which made me not want to even approach him. Something's different about Adrian though.

Aaron finally comes out of the bathroom, fully dressed and looking actually ready to have a normal day, instead of completely dead.

"Hey, so what did you want to talk to me about?" he asks, sitting on the couch next to me.

I take a deep breath. "I know I can trust you with my secrets, and you're not the first person to know this, but you're the first person I'm straight up telling instead of them figuring it out."

"Go on," he says, kind of confused.

"Well, I'm gay. I am very gay."

"Really? Why does everyone come out to me?" he questions.

"Huh?"

"Adrian came out to me and now you're coming out to me. Also, why is everyone gay?"

"I don't know. Anyways, I'm gay, and I need advice. I don't know what to do right now," I state.

"Tell me what's up, I'll try to help you."

"Thanks, Aaron. Anyways, if you noticed, I'm spending like, all my time with Adrian. Damn near every second of the day that I'm not in class or when we're in practice, I'm hanging out with Adrian. I went straight to the hospital after he got concussed in week 5, and I stayed by him all night in his room."

"Oh, I think I know where this is going."

"Well, yeah. I have feelings for Adrian, and I've known that for a few weeks now, but my feelings are getting way too out of hand. I feel like I'm gonna say something stupid and screw up our friendship, and I don't want to do that," I say, looking down.

"Derek, I really had no clue you were gay. You kind of acted zesty and said fruity things during high school, but I thought that was just you being comfortable with your sexuality and not being afraid of acting gay."

"Well, I'm completely gay, and unfathomably gay for Adrian."

"That's some crazy vocabulary. Anyways, I feel like you got feelings for him because you spent a lot of time with him. It makes sense, when there's one person you want to hang out with, it starts out with you wanting to chill with them as friends, and then you slowly want to become more and more romantically involved. It's normal," he says.

"I think it's more than that, though." I lower my voice a little bit. "Last night, he was jumped by a bunch of Florida State players and I was the one to pick him up and we hugged for like 30 minutes. His blood and tears are all over one of my wife beaters, and I don't even care that much."

"He was jumped?" Aaron asks, surprised.

"Yeah. They really hurt him. He was crying so much and I just wanted to hold him forever and make him feel okay. Once he went to sleep, I went back out and found the Florida State players and beat every single one of them up. There were like 5 of them and I was so angry at what they did to Adrian and I beat them all up. Some of them were linemen."

"Are they gonna press charges?"

"No, they committed a hate crime, so they can't without Adrian getting involved and suing them back," I respond.

"Do you think you love him?"

"I don't know. I really don't. My feelings are definitely taking me to a point where I will undoubtedly love him, and for all I know I love him right now. I really don't want anything else in the world other than to just kiss him and hold him in my arms."

"Damn. That's some serious feelings, Derek. I think you should ask him out, not now, but whenever you feel comfortable with him knowing that you really want him. You two would be a really cute couple, by the way. The way you're telling me you have been treating Adrian, I think you would be a great boyfriend."

"You think I would?" I ask.

"Yeah. Cam is the perfect boyfriend for me. He showers me with love, gifts I don't need, and just makes me feel so happy. I think you'd do the same for Adrian. I know that Adrian was kind of upset he didn't really get to experience high school romance, but you can be all the romance he needs. I'm sure he would be eternally grateful if you just took him on one date."

"It's crazy that no one wanted to be with Adrian in high school. He's so beautiful."

"See? Cameron calls me beautiful every 5 seconds, and you can do the same for Adrian. Just do what you think is right, okay? I believe you will make the right decision. You're not dumb, and I think Adrian might either already know you like him or like you back. You went out of your way to spend the night with him in the hospital, knowing it would probably be uncomfortable to not be sleeping in a bed. That's real shit, and I'm sure Adrian is so grateful for that. You also picked him up and consoled him after he got jumped, which is also such an amazing thing to do. He might not have feelings for you right now, but if you're basically his protector, he'll realize that no one can ever treat him as well as you're treating him, and he'll fall for you too," Aaron states.

"You think he'll actually want me?"

"I mean, I kind of have to assume that he already wants you, there's a reason he's only spending time with you. He likes being with you. You make him happy. You make him feel better about himself, and that might not sound like much, but it really is."

"He does say I make him feel safer when I'm with him," I remember. That was one of the most meaningful things anyone has ever said to me.

"See? Listen, Derek, I know that Adrian is going through some shit right now. Me and Cam are also dealing with a lot of homophobia, but we have each other, and Adrian didn't really have someone before you decided to help him. That means a lot to him, I have to assume. You showed to him that you care a lot about him, and he needed that. He needed to know for sure that someone cared enough about him to spend every moment with him."

"Yeah, I guess I am kind of showing him how meaningful he is to me," I say.

"Exactly. Now, one more question. Was coming out to me difficult?"

"I mean, I kind of just needed to rant to someone, and you're the only person I know other than Adrian that kind of has an idea of what I'm going through right now."

"Would you care if other people knew?" he asks and I ponder it for a moment before finally answering.

"I don't know. I don't really want that many people knowing, but I feel like I'm opening the floodgates at this point. Three other people that are major influences in my life know I'm gay now, and I don't even know how to react."

"I feel like this is a dumb question to ask, because I should've picked up context clues, but does Adrian already know you're gay?" Aaron asks. I might've forgotten to tell him that.

"Yes. Adrian knows, because uh, he, uh, I came out to him, because I also trust him."

"Well, now that's another thing that could make him want you. When I first came out, and was already catching feelings for Jason, I really had no way of knowing his sexuality. That made things pretty frustrating, because I didn't want to ask him out and embarrass myself by asking a straight dude out. But Adrian knows you're gay, you know he's gay, and he might want you even more because he knows there's a better chance that you like him."

"I guess. I want him so bad, not even sexually, just straight up romantically. I just want to hold him and tell him how much I like him. I want to go to movies and fancy restaurants together. I want to go on nice vacations with him," I ramble.

"Wow. You are in way too deep, Derek, and that's absolutely not a bad thing in any way. I eventually realized that's what I wanted more with me and Cam, and we've gone all season without having sex."

"Uh, that's great."

"I know, right? We're just cuddling and shit. It's lowkey better than constantly having my back being blown out. Now my back is just being blown out from getting tackled in games. Not as bad, bu-"

"Okay, that's great, I'm over the moon for you two, but I don't need to know about my best friend's sex life," I tell him.

"You mean currently non-existent sex life?"

"Yeah, whatever you have."

"Sorry. Anyways, if you want Adrian so bad like that, and don't even really feel like sex should be an essential part of a relationship with him, that means a lot. If you can just sit and talk for a long time instead of fucking constantly, that's a healthy relationship. I was worried about the transition from extremely sexually active to basically no sex at all in me and Cameron's relationship, but I think we really pulled through and have proved to each other that our love is more powerful than mindblowing sex," Aaron rambles.

"Do you actually think I would be good for Adrian?"

"Are you serious? You're literally perfect for him. You would give him everything he wants and more. Do you realize how happy he would be if you just asked him out? When you don't really have much of a romantic life, you will jump at the first opportunity to go on a date with someone. And look at you! I don't think anyone would say no to you," Aaron states and I blush a little.

"Uh, thanks?"

"Listen, there are a lot of things you can do, but if you break his heart somehow, that would be so upsetting to see. Adrian is such a kind person, and you breaking his heart would be awful to watch."

"Trust me, I would never break his heart. I don't want to be with anyone else, and that's not gonna change anytime soon. It's just Adrian who I'm interested in," I tell him.

"Well, do something about it. Ask him out."

"You can't be telling me to ask someone out when you knew you were in love with Cameron for months and didn't do anything about it," I laugh.

"Don't talk about that time, that was embarrassing for me. I should've said something to him. Especially since he loved me too."

I laugh again. "Anyways, I don't know if I've really had the opportunity, for whatever reason, to congratulate you and Cam. You have no idea how happy I am for you. I'm so glad you found permanent love, I truly am."

"Thank you, Derek. I will be giving that same exact speech to you when you get with Adrian."

"I can only hope," I say.

"That's dumb. You can do much more than just hope, for instance, ask him out on a date. Or disguise it as just going somewhere as friends and then pay for his stuff and then ask him out on a real, formal date. Pay for him there too. The blonde one has to pay every time."

"Why?" I question.

"Because that's better than me paying. Cameron still gets a lot of money from his parents without them knowing, so of course he's paying every time."

"And because he's the man in the relationship?" I ask, laughing at Aaron again.

"No, that's not true. He's the girl."

"You said you're the one getting your back blown out," I point out.

"Shit. Whatever. Well, it's me most of the time."

"Well, I'll pay for him only because I like him so much."

"Good. Don't even try to deny your feelings either, tell him straight up that you really like him and want to be boyfriends. Be straightforward, don't make him have to connect the dots. That's just stupid and a waste of time that could be spent being boyfriends," Aaron says.

"Okay. I'll try to do that at some point."

"Good. Is Adrian okay right now?"

"Yeah. He was fine when he woke up. He has a black eye but he still looks so fucking gorgeous," I reply.

"I'm glad he's doing alright. Now, I'm sure you have to get back to him. Give him a kiss and he'll feel much better, I guarantee," Aaron says. I stand up.

"I won't do that, I might at some point, but thanks for all the advice, Aaron. I will try to go on a date with Adrian and not fuck it up."

"I think you can pull through. Don't stress it. I'll see you later."

I leave Aaron and Cam's room and go back to Adrian's room, quietly opening to door in case Adrian is sleeping again. He should be getting rest, he really needs it.

I walk in, and Adrian is sitting on the couch, his body stretched out across all of the cushions. He bags on me for wearing short shorts, but the shorts he has on right now are way shorter. He's so fucking cute and I want to just hold his face in my hands.

"Hey, Derek," he says, smiling at me.

"Hey, Adrian. Is there any football on yet?"

"Yeah. The Panthers are playing the Jets. That's it," Adrian says, disappointedly.

"Damn, is that really it? I guess that's the best we'll get, but that's still terrible."

"Yeah. I can cope though, it's not the end of the world."

"True."

Adrian turns on the TV and finds the Panthers vs. Jets game. I don't want to watch this bullshit game, but it's football, and there's nothing else to do today. As long as I'm with Adrian right now, that's all that really matters to me.

We watch the game for a while, very often commenting on the atrocious play by both teams, which might be hard to watch, but it's hilarious, especially with Adrian. I think Adrian just makes everything better, honestly. He brings joy to everything he's involved in, and just makes me want to be a happier person all the time.

Around halftime, I feel Adrian's head hit my shoulder, and I look down and realize he's sleeping. I put an arm around him and hold him closer to me. I don't really love being a human pillow, but just like everything else he touches, Adrian makes it good. I am willing to sit here for hours if that means Adrian gets more rest. Watching him sleep kind of feels weird, but he's sleeping on me, so it's difficult not to.

"Adri, I'm falling for you," I whisper to him quietly. "I don't know what's happening to me, but you're making me go crazy for you."

I obviously get no answer from him, because he's sleeping. Somehow, I think he heard me. I hope he wants me as much as I want him.

A/N: Kind of a filler chapter. More was supposed to happen between Adrian and Derek in this chapter, but the dialogue between Derek and Aaron was flowing perfectly. I am so excited to write the next chapter. I've had ideas for it in my head for weeks, and I'm so excited. This slow burn is finally paying off for me and all of you that stuck with it. Again, I'm considering not having any angst between Derek and Adrian, but there will still be plenty of drama. Just not between the two of them. I just don't see them breaking up, especially because of everything Derek said about Adrian in this chapter. Thanks for reading!!!